Quotes About The Bathroom

#1. There was a point in my 40s when I went into the bathroom with a bottle of wine, locked the door, and said, 'I'm not coming out until I can totally accept the way that I look right now.'

Sharon Stone

#2. Of all the subjects on this planet, I think my parents would have been hard put to name one less useful than Greek mythology to securing the keys to an executive bathroom.

J.K. Rowling

#3. The name 'United Nations' was Franklin D. Roosevelt's idea. He rushed to tell Winston Churchill, who was towelling himself stark naked in his bathroom.

John Lloyd

#4. I don't want to be like the actor who rehearses everything in the bathroom, then comes to the set and carries on completely uninterrupted while the other actors tiptoe away.

Ben Kingsley

#5. I rather like the idea of having all my hours to myself: eating a Fudge Sundae, watching a movie, sleeping on my couch, singing in the bathroom, studying the woods, kidding around with a girl, playing cards lazily - all kinds of stuff that American brands 'shiftless.'

Jack Kerouac

#6. When I go to the bathrooms, I cannot take off my pants as before; because there is a light continuously blinking like a camera, everyone says it is just an environmental friendly lighting. Well, I cannot really trust it and I am not taking the risk of circulating my naked photos around.

M.F. Moonzajer

#7. What you forget when you're planning a hijack by yourself is somewhere along the line, you might need to neglect your hostages just long enough so you can use the bathroom.

Chuck Palahniuk

#8. And you think that's going to work?" Dink, dink, dink, dink. "Oh, shut up." Gemma turned and went into the bathroom as he tried not to gloat.
"What?" Dink. "I didn't say a thing." Dink. And with that, he failed to not gloat.

Kathleen Brooks

#9. I'm still trying to defog the bathroom mirror to see the dream for what it clearly is.

From A Wildflower

#10. There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom.

Kiefer Sutherland

#11. I wanna get rich enough in life that I can afford to release a dozen doves every time I walk into a room. You know people would be like, 'Did you see that guy come out of the bathroom? The one with doves, it was beautiful.'

Daniel Tosh

#12. They went on to say that Coach would have to be kept in a kennel the entire day and only be let out to go to the bathroom. So even then they wanted to deny Coach the ability to do his job. It was insanity. Discrimination. Ignorance.

Stefany Shaheen

#13. I remember the first guy who offered me a joint in the bathroom. I said 'No, man, I've got enough problems.'

Steven Tyler

#14. I come out of the bathroom and the first thing I see is Ed. Okay, it was a long shot, but I was half hoping he would cease to exist while we were gone.

Cath Crowley

#15. An ex-ABT ballerina, while staging a ballet for the company, once followed a dancer into the bathroom to deliver notes through the stall door. She was known to bark - literally, like a dog - during private rehearsals.

Sascha Radetsky

#16. You have the power to pause stuff and you have the power to go to the bathroom. You can do whatever you want in your own home. It's a much more relaxed thing. It's more like a book, it seems to me. That's kind of the way I watch movies.

David Fincher

#17. Never discuss the poem you contemplate writing. It's like turning on the outside spigot. It takes all the pressure off the upstairs bathroom.

Robert Frost

#18. Using the bathroom in a frat house is like hanging out the door of a speeding car. You're taking a risk.

Kandi Steiner

#19. There is other disturbing facts surround the hideous 911 attacks, which my family and I could see from the third floor bathroom window of our homes!

Amiri Baraka

#20. Whenever I'm on tour and I'm in my hotel room and I'm writing and playing my guitar, I go in the bathroom and I record whatever I'm writing in there. It's just what I love to do.

Colbie Caillat

#21. You really are a know-it-all pain in the ass," I announced snarkily, brushing by him rudely. I stopped quickly at Ellie and Adam to say, "I'm happy for you." And then I hurried by them down the hall to the bathroom to get away from Braden and his perceptive, growly, inflexible ass.

Samantha Young

#22. Fang (sarcasticaly): Go pick out a tree and I'll carve our initials in it.
Max: (screams and goes in the bathroom)

James Patterson

#23. Some people out there think everything I do is a publicity stunt, they think when I go to the bathroom it's a publicity stunt.

Madonna Ciccone

#24. In order to satirize adequately, I think you need to bring people down to Earth and be like, 'Yeah, these people drink coffee and have tummy troubles and they go to the bathroom like anybody else, and they all have relationship problems, if they even have relationships.'

Anna Chlumsky

#25. One time I tried to use the bathroom in the dark, and I missed the toilet, and I fell on the floor.

Rita Ora

#26. I've never turned blue in someone else's
bathroom. I consider that the height of bad
manners.

Keith Richards

#27. Outside the window as steam fogged up the bathroom mirror. The Punisher. That's what I'll call myself, and that is the name that they will fear. It will keep them up at night and have them all looking around

Sara Humphreys

#28. I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth. It is good to brush your teeth when you are angry, because you brush harder and do a better job.

Lemony Snicket

#29. I started singing in the bathroom. Nothing was coming out. It was ghastly.

Rod Stewart

#30. The company revealed that 18 percent of readers report using the Bible app in the bathroom.

Nir Eyal

#31. The body is sort of a pain. It has to go to the bathroom. It has to be comfortable. But the spirit is indestructible. It can move at the speed of light.

Robert Ballard

#32. I was going to wake up early tomorrow and go into the bathroom and write 'I love you' on the mirror with a bar of soap.

Taylor Jenkins Reid

#33. A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.

Bill Cosby

#34. If your shoes stick to the bar floor, you may need to re-think using the bar bathroom.

Kimberly J. Dalferes

#35. When I encounter someone I haven't seen in a while, I have never once thought, I should jump at them and poke their face with my fingers and keep doing that until someone locks me in the bathroom. Because that's insane. What would you think if I did that to your dog friends?

Allie Brosh

#36. Do me a favor, guys. Don't drink so much that you become the guy that goes into the bathroom and moans while taking a leak. See, the women in the room, they might not know what we're talking about; every dude knows.

Christian Finnegan

#37. I pace the room, trying to figure out a solution. She can't stay here. But I want her to stay. I can't share a bathroom with her, but I don't really want anyone else to share a bathroom with her, either. I'm a little bit selfish, apparently.

Colleen Hoover

#38. In 1969 America put the man on the moon.
In 2016 America put the man in the women's bathroom.

Celso Cukierkorn

#39. His lazy eye drifting around the room like a child looking for the bathroom.

Chuck Klosterman

#40. In the cafe bathroom drinking free tap water
Thinking; "Damn, I should've been a better father to my daughter"

Slug

#41. I have piles of poetry books in the bathroom, on the stairs, everywhere. The only way to write poetry is to read it.

Carol Ann Duffy

#42. I bet that the best thing about being a hermaphrodite is that you always get to use the bathroom with the shortest line.

Brad Wilkerson

#43. I like 'Goodbye My Lover' because it's a really personal song and I recorded it in my landlady's bathroom in Los Angeles. She had a piano in there and for me listening back to it, it actually sounds like the voice I hear in my head. It's so close to what I can imagine.

James Blunt

#44. The bathroom door swings open and Nate walks out. He's toweling his damp hair and wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.
Crap. I should have left this for a more appropriately clothed time of day.

Rachel Morgan

#45. She have to go pick up prescription, so I watch Sophie for short time. And tiny bears are happy when I go in bathroom."
"Hamsters, Mrs. Korjev, not bears."
...
"I've got her now," Charlie said. "One of you stay with her while I get rid of the H-A-M-S-T-E-R-S."
"He mean the tiny bears.

Christopher Moore

#46. Japanese women live in fear of making the least sound in a bathroom stall. Japanese men pay no attention to the subject whatsoever.

Amelie Nothomb

#47. When Demetrie got sick, we knew it was our responsibility to take care of her and pay her medical bills. And we embraced that. But the tricky part is, like so many families in the South, we also expected her to use a separate bathroom, to use separate utensils.

Kathryn Stockett

#48. My understanding of Twitter was that it was a bunch of famous people telling you when they're going to the bathroom. And, that was not something I wanted to be part of.

Kerry Washington

#49. For the others, like me, there is only the flash
Of negative knowledge, the night when, drunk, one
Staggers to the bathroom and stares in the glass
To meet one's madness

W. H. Auden

#50. People never sing ... except in the bathroom. Birthing women also make their natural sounds next to running bath water. There is something about the power of water. People are drawn to water, spas, and sacred streams. Women in labor are drawn to water, too.

Michel Odent

#51. It's always in those moments when you've shunned God, or you've gone ahead as if you don't need Him, that you find yourself crawling back with pathetic little attempts to get His attention because suddenly you're weak and you need to convince yourself you're not alone on the bathroom floor.

Hannah Brencher

#52. I'd rather be able to face myself in the bathroom mirror than be rich and famous.

Ani DiFranco

#53. I always seem to be chosen to do very flattering things like the beard comb over or go to the bathroom with the door open on Sex and the City or be the guy people meow at in Super Troopers. It's great for self esteem.

Jim Gaffigan

#54. Once, I lived in an apartment with a skylight in the bathroom. Every winter, it would snow through the skyline, but we got a discount because of it.

Jim Parsons

#55. Three Denises wobbled in front of her, all of them watching her with fond concern. You're a sweetie. I appreciate you cheering me on from the sidelines. But I think I need to go to the bathroom now and throw up.

Sarah Mayberry

#56. Problem is, the bathroom pass can't help you escape life. It's still there when you come out. Problems and crap don't go away hiding in the can.

Simone Elkeles

#57. Kitten, when did you get so tall? (Ravyn)
I grew while you were in the bathroom. (Erika)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#58. I picked up the phone to call the police, but then I considered how it would sound when I told them that I was calling from inside my bathroom, where I'd OD'ed on laxatives, and that a possible rapist was quietly passing me notes under the bathroom door.

Jenny Lawson

#59. Shrouded in his red cassock, he padded off to the bathroom lost in the silent ecstasy or wearing new socks.

Julia Stuart

#60. And you want more holes because you think pain will distract you from all the annoying celebrating? Or because stabbing me will make you feel better?"
"Something like that." She smiled enigmatically, went into the bathroom, and came out with a wad of cotton balls and a safety pin.

Holly Black

#61. I had an older brother, an older sister and a younger brother, and though I look back fondly on my childhood, I think that when you've got four siblings sharing the same resources and a single kids' bathroom, it's going to get a little tense at times.

Jeff Kinney

#62. Michelle would get picked up and bang someone anonymous stud in the bathroom, and i would sip my drink wishing i could go home and curl up with a book. i sigh. thats ok. she was my vicarious slutty friend. and for that i loved her

Marata Eros

#63. Now, my brothers are bustin' their asses to cover our shit, and you race to the bathroom like you're fifteen, we're in your bedroom, I just popped your cherry, and your Dad's at the door. Babe, I get you got issues but on top of all our other shit, we gotta spend some time sortin' those out.

Kristen Ashley

#64. And now I've got to explain the smell that was in there before I went in there. Does that ever happen to you? It's not your fault. You've held your breath, you just wanna get out, and now you open the door and you have to explain, 'Oh! Listen, there's an odor in there and I didn't do it. It's bad.

Ellen DeGeneres

#65. I was depressed as a child. I found it hard to make friends. My favourite thing was locking myself in the bathroom and practising comedy routines.

David Walliams

#66. How about we get rid of separate bathrooms for boys and girls? Gays and straights share the bathroom with zero issues. We need to put an end to the sexist pooping policies of yesterday. The only way to achieve gender equality is to start crapping in front of each other.

Daniel Tosh

#67. Girl you need to go in the bathroom and get a mirror and look at the ones I put down below, on your pussy.

Chris Renee

#68. I sleep through the next day. Each time I go to the bathroom, I try not to look in the mirror. Once, I catch my reflection: it looks like I've been punched in both eyes.
I can't talk about the day that follows that.

Nina LaCour

#69. Yeah ... I finally understood it ...
That exchanging information ...
Sharing time ...
The act of "let's go to the bathroom together" was the holy ritual of confirming one's friendship ...
Until now I was an idiot doing stupid things.

Taishi Zaou, Eiki Eiki

#70. Make sure your bathroom is clean. If you're having a girl over the house for the first time, make sure your toilet is clean, not disgusting. Guys' bathrooms are always the most disgusting thing.

Carly Aquilino

#71. The result was enough noise to wake the dead, one of whom started hammering on the bathroom door.
Miss Palmer. Are you all right?

Karen Chance

#72. Tonight , I leave the bathroom light on and double-check the lock on the front door. I rest in the middle of the bed again and make a few more snow angels. It is a fruitless exercise though, because when I am done moving my arms upward and downward, I end up in exactly the same place I started.

Julie Buxbaum

#73. Let's stick together." "Well, you're going to have to wait here for me there: I'm going to the bathroom." "But how long are you going to be?" "Oh, three hours?" "Rocky ...

Georgia Byng

#74. Through the small tall bathroom window the December yard is gray and scratchy, the tree calligraphic.

Dave Eggers

#75. It's too late. It's too late. Through the open door of the bathroom I see a watersoaked bag on the floor.

John Rechy

#76. You know your life is completely screwed up when you have to look up the mythological figures who talk to you in the bathroom mirror.

Maurissa Guibord

#77. The bathroom door swings open. Emma sees the blood painting my skin and the red rivers carved on my body. Emma sees the wet knife, silver and bone. The screams of my little sister shatter mirrors.

Laurie Halse Anderson

#78. A mother comforts, a mother cleans. A mother gives when any reasonable person would deny. Life might affix any number of labels to Vera- Russian, pensioner, widow, daughter- but when she looked to her washed-out reflection in the bathroom mirror, she saw only Lydia's mother.

Anthony Marra

#79. So he taped a sign on the bathroom door that said OFFICE OF MR. THOMAS WADE. My mom put a sign next to it that said I'D RATHER BE FISHING.

Katherine Applegate

#80. There won't be any revolution in America ... The people are all too clean. They spend all their time changing shirts and washing themselves. You can't feel fierce and revolutionary in a bathroom.

Eric Linklater

#81. I smoke so much. Three packs a day ... I went to the bathroom, a camel came out of my ass.

Dave Attell

#82. For marriage to be a success, every woman and every man should have her and his own bathroom. The end.

Catherine Zeta-Jones

#83. And Father's fondness for talking about farting and going to the bathroom is disgusting.

Anne Frank

#84. Inside their small house, Grace listened as Roman stood from the couch and walked into the bathroom. He sat down to piss. She thought that Roman's sit-down pisses were one of the most romantic and caring things that any man had ever done for any woman. After

Sherman Alexie

#85. The same kind of Diefenbachia that Grandmother Waterhouse used to have growing on the counter in her downstairs bathroom.

Neal Stephenson

#86. I can't believe anyone would voluntarily run 26 miles. Sometimes I sit on the couch cross-legged because I don't feel like walking to the bathroom.

Jen Lancaster

#87. She came out of the bathroom a couple of minutes later, holding five sticks in one hand. She stared at them, horrified, like they were going to start calling her Mommy at any moment.

S.C. Stephens

#88. Mother says there are locked rooms inside all women, kitchen of love, bedroom of grief, bathroom of apathy. Sometimes, the men, they come with keys, and sometimes the men, they come with hammers.

Warsan Shire

#89. The secret of marriage is: separate bedrooms and separate bathrooms.

Bette Davis

#90. Clair smiled, "I don't sing, and besides, shower singing is meant only for the person taking the shower."
Alex walked into the bathroom and stood beside the tub. "So does that mean if I were to join you, you'd sing to me?"
"Maybe," she grinned.

Loni Flowers

#91. My special thing as a kid was to play dead because I thought I was really good at it. When I was 7 or 8, I even did it in the bathroom with a hair dryer in the bathtub. I realized that I was good at it because each time my mom would scream.

Daniel Bruhl

#92. It has come to the point where if I know I'm leaving a house with a man, I can factor in a bathroom visit or a phone call or both, and when I'm done, he'll almost be done tying his shoes.

Mindy Kaling

#93. People forget that public people and celebrities, they too have to go to the bathroom and get divorced.

John Densmore

#94. I'm staking out the bathroom to see if I can pick up chicks," he told her. "See? It worked.

Hailey Abbott

#95. He said that when you are in love with someone, you want to follow them to the bathroom. He said love just makes you pathetic.

Heather O'Neill

#96. Sometimes making a story is as easy as putting two characters in a room and seeing what happens. So, imagine a great white shark and a giant squid in the same bathroom.

Jim Toomey

#97. I completely bombed the audition ... I was insecure, stopping and starting. I went to the bathroom and cried.

Lake Bell

#98. I stand and grab a hefty bottle of perfume from the bathroom shelf and return to the bedroom door. It's not much of a weapon, I know, but it's heavy and square, and hitting someone over the head with a glass brick has got to be better than bitch-slapping them.

Nick Alexander

#99. My favourite room in my house is easily the top room, which is a bedroom but also a bathroom, with a big, wooden carved bath, two huge fireplaces and a raised bit in the corner for performances. I've had some really lovely parties and poetry readings up there.

Deborah Moggach

#100. I'm going to the bathroom, not to Beirut. What horrible fate do you think's waiting for me in there? Death by toilet swirly?

Melissa Landers