Top 50 Quotes About Strippers
#1. Yeah? What're you planning?"
"She nixed the keg and the strippers, so I don't know. Maybe we'll have a bonfire and torch some furniture.
Jessica Martinez
#2. What does this research tell us? It tells us that fiscally concerned strippers should eschew contraception and double up their shifts just before ovulation.
David Eagleman
#3. I like the idea of going out with a woman and not doing anything, and just eating dinner and talking, and that's cool, too. So, someone might look at me and say, "No way, man. He's just banging strippers." And I do that, but not all the time.
Henry Rollins
#4. You walk into a strip club with a wad of cash; they all flock around you. Strippers are just pigeons with tits. They go where the bread is.
Chris Hardwick
#5. I frowned at the list. So ... I'll go back and tell the Traynors that I'm going to get their suicidal quadriplegic son drunk, spend their money on strippers and lap dancers, and then trundle him off to the Disability Olympics -
Jojo Moyes
#6. Yeah I'm telling real stories, but if you pick up a documentary on strippers, you're going to want to see some stripping, so we definitely got that in there.
Method Man
#7. Belly strippers! The use of this device is one of the most highly prized - and highly priced - secrets of fast-money winners.
John Scarne
#8. Making my way out towards the forest with a fresh fox-fur cap on my head, I felt like the most stylish of male strippers as I frolicked through the snow.
Brent Roth
#10. I said no strippers, I said, watching dumbfounded as Trenton danced around the room to Britney Spears.
Jamie McGuire
#11. Polls? Nah ... they're for strippers and cross country skiers.
Sarah Palin
#12. They got ninjas working as strippers in this town or something? Well.
L.A. Witt
#13. Cuttin' taxes for strippers and thugs.
Ja Rule
#14. Hot dogs are like strippers, really. Nobody wants to know the backstory. We don't want to think about how they came to be in their present form of employment. "Well, when I was twelve, my stepfather.." "Not interested! Put some mustard on that.
Jim Gaffigan
#15. Boys dream of strippers, men dream of their women waiting for them at home.
Kathleen Brooks
#16. Which was one reason why Revolt of the Zombie Strippers was being shot in Gallup and not in a warehouse in Van Nuys.
Janet Evanovich
#17. But it's Atlanta that can lay claim to the best of the best (which is to say worst) chef-friendly dives in America: the legendary Clermont Lounge, a sort of lost-luggage department for strippers, who perform - perfunctorily - on a stage behind the bar.
Anthony Bourdain
#18. Americans are gluttons. We shop with forklifts. We have a holiday where we stuff food into other food. Our strippers wrestle in Jell-O, where other countries have to use mud.
Bill Maher
#19. What's funny is that male strippers don't wear thongs anymore. They wear flat backs.
Joe Manganiello
#20. We skipped over the part where we just accept and respect that some women like to seem exhibitionistic and lickerish, and decided instead that everyone who is sexually liberated ought to be imitating strippers and porn stars.
Ariel Levy
#21. Life ain't all burritos and strippers, my friend. - TRUE FACT
Darynda Jones
#22. My boobs are, like, huge, my whole life, buying a bra was a nightmare. What I used to do when I moved to L.A., I found places like Frederick's of Hollywood that make bras for [strippers].
Sofia Vergara
#23. Montreal was a very active jazz center until club owners started putting in strippers instead of music. Before long, there was nothing to hear.
Oscar Peterson
#24. I can't eat chicken and look at strippers at the same time.
Jerry Seinfeld
#25. Republicans don't believe government works, and get into it to prove it will fail. Same with strippers and relationships.
Dana Gould
#26. Strippers. Get them a job, then an apartment, buy some clothes, feed them nice dinners, and then they get culture and start making demands. They were an expensive habit, but one he could not break.
John Grisham
#27. I want to do a documentary about strippers, 'cause it's a moneymaker.
Method Man
#28. This was why men fell in love with strippers and escorts: it wasn't the licentiousness, the dissembling, their craven willingness to do whatever you wanted. It was the way they would, out of the blue, surprise you with the psychic ability to know what you needed.
Chris Bohjalian
#29. Strippers should be role-models for little girls. If only for the fact that they wax their assholes.
Sarah Silverman
#30. My night was fine too," I volunteered. "Thanks for asking. I went to a strip club and then I robbed a bank with a bunch of strippers. We didn't take much, since y'know strippers don't tend to have many pockets.
R.S. Grey
#31. I love to play strippers and to imitate them. I love using that idea for comedy, but the idea of actually going there? I feel like we all need to be better than that. That industry needs to die, by all of us being a little bit better than that.
Tina Fey
#32. Between 60 and 80 percent of strippers come from a background of sexual abuse.
Caitlin Moran
#33. The reason why we're strippers, is invariably more boring, more grounded in nonexistential needs like money - and pragmatic concerns, like money.
Ruth Fowler
#34. Rhythm and sex go together and that's where I come from as far as the music goes. Rag Doll and Love In An Elevator are such sexual songs that you put them on & the strippers go NUTS!
Joe Perry
#35. Of course, the strippers also take pains not to appear too innocent, valorous, or bookishly inclined. (In direct opposition to the Swayze Mandate of 1987, everybody puts Baby in a goddamn corner.)
Diablo Cody
#36. To a bystander like me, those who made 190 million pounds deliberately underselling the shares of HBOS, in spite of its very strong capital base, and drove it into the bosom of Lloyds TSB Bank, are clearly bank robbers and asset strippers.
John Sentamu
#37. You don't call them 'strippers.' They're dancers. 'Strippers' sounds cheesy and amateurish. These women are professionals." The man sipped his beer and glanced at Zoe. "And, you don't call them booger bars or strip joints, for the same reason.
Jackson Burnett
#38. Looking about to burst into laughter, he replied, You have two male dogs in a pen which is wrapped in bright pink fishnet. They look like they're strippers. They look like hookers, Nat!
Belle Aurora
#39. Around the outside of the room other beautiful women wearing little or nothing at all flitted between the infatuated, intoxicated men, sometimes luring them away for a private dance. The men would follow obediently, weighed down by lust and credit cards.
R.D. Ronald
#40. He told me he was used to getting what he wanted.
Celia Conrad
#41. She lives like tomorrow isn't coming and yesterday never happened.
Crystal Woods
#42. What good is it if they miss your face but not your mind?
Crystal Woods
#43. I was a hip kid. When I saw Bambi it was the midnight show.
George Carlin
#44. He said I'm the winning lottery ticket, like he's never meant anything more.
Crystal Woods
#45. Daddy is jive talking
and showering the stripper
Mommy is sleepwalking
while changing baby's diaper
Casey Renee Kiser
#46. My time in heaven was up, and I was being told I wasn't the marrying kind by someone who undresses for a living.
Chelsea Handler
#47. I think we should throw money at artists, not at girls who take their clothes off because they made a bad choice in life.
Darnell Lamont Walker
#48. She was no stripper with a heart of gold, that was for sure. A heart of steel, more like.
Shannon Celebi
#49. Yes, it's me, your PA, now your stripper for the evening. How do you do?
Kate Meader
#50. ... The shocking thing about any stripper gathering, I discovered, was that you have never heard women talk so fast and so explicitly about money in all your life. They make the guys on the trading floor on Wall Street look like a bunch of pansies.
Susie Bright
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