Top 100 Diablo Cody Quotes
#1. Juno MacGuff: Wise move. I know this girl who had a huge crazy freakout because she took too many behavioral meds at once. She took off all her clothes and jumped into the fountain at Ridgedale Mall and she was like, "Blaaaaah! I'm a kraken from the sea!"
Su-Chin: That was you.
Diablo Cody
#3. The fashion industry isn't merely content to encase my meaty flanks in skintight denim. Oh, no! That denim also has to be white, a color that attracts ketchup, wine, garlic aioli, and any other foodstuffs I might otherwise be able to enjoy if I wasn't wearing ridiculously tight pants.
Diablo Cody
#4. I actually have two children now, and sometimes I wonder if that's it. Because they do make writing and directing more complicated and more difficult, especially now that they're very young.
Diablo Cody
#5. I just go about my life. I'm a mom, I drive an SUV, I go to the grocery store every day. I'm definitely not a celebrity. I always say that I'm a celebrity-adjacent.
Diablo Cody
#6. A few months ago, I had the pleasure of actually visiting the Playboy Mansion. I saw the peacocks, fed grapes to the monkeys, and even braved the fabled Grotto. After seeing the estate, I understood why anyone would be reluctant to leave.
Diablo Cody
#7. Juno MacGuff: I don't know what kind of girl I am.
Diablo Cody
#8. I've been an avid consumer of young adult literature since I was one, and I think some people leave that stuff behind when they become old adults, but I never did. I was always interested in the fantasy world created in those novels.
Diablo Cody
#9. I want Maggie Gyllenhaal. I don't know why. I don't think she necessarily looks like me or acts like me, I just think she's a cool actress and she could play me, so there you go.
Diablo Cody
#10. There's something about a roller coaster that triggers strong feelings, maybe because most of us associate them with childhood. They're inherently cinematic; the very shape of a coaster, all hills and valleys and sickening helices, evokes a human emotional response.
Diablo Cody
#11. I'm a pessimist by nature. I don't think things are ever going to work out, I'm not particularly ambitious.
Diablo Cody
#12. I myself identify as a recovering Blockhead. You'd be surprised how many twenty- and thirty-something hipster chicks have the NKOTB skeleton in their closet, albeit artfully concealed by stacks of Ksubi skinny jeans and ironic Judas Priest T-shirts.
Diablo Cody
#13. I've come to find more satisfaction and enjoyment in writing screenplays over the years because that's what I do primarily now.
Diablo Cody
#14. Speaking of Twitter, I don't even know if I composed a blog entry in 2009, as I was too busy parceling my every thought into cute 140-character sound bites. I used to only worry about being pithy for a living; now some of my best lines are wasted on a free app!
Diablo Cody
#15. I have a huge repertoire. I love karaoke.
Diablo Cody
#16. Let it be said that the makeup artist at '90210' made me look better for the fake red carpet than I've ever looked on an actual red carpet.
Diablo Cody
#19. I don't have a terrible singing voice, but I also wouldn't call it 'good.' I can carry a tune.
Diablo Cody
#20. You make a first impression and people never forget it. If people want to think of me as the wacky 'Juno' lady forever, I could think of worse ways to be labeled.
Diablo Cody
#21. Vodka Redbull: Upper meets downer in an effervescent hybrid of bubble gum and junkie piss
Diablo Cody
#22. Honestly, this will never happen because she's so much classier than me, but I would love to work with Sofia Coppola.
Diablo Cody
#23. Shoulda gone to China. They give away babies like free iPods. They put them in guns and shoot them out at sporting events.
Diablo Cody
#24. Everybody knows that I'm not a snob when it comes to pop culture, obviously. I love reality shows.
Diablo Cody
#25. For me, writing essays, prose and fiction is a great way to be self-indulgent.
Diablo Cody
#26. In my opinon, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with.
Diablo Cody
#27. These days, the Rolling Stones still have an edge, but that fangs-out ferocity has mellowed considerably.
Diablo Cody
#28. I would never consent to a lame publicity stunt at a time when I already want to hide.
Diablo Cody
#29. I grew up in the Midwest; you don't know any screenwriters. It didn't seem like a realistic career possibility.
Diablo Cody
#30. Hollywood is a perpetual summerland, a temperate, godless yaw where the very word 'season' has been co-opted by television executives. There are few harbingers of winter here.
Diablo Cody
#31. 'Sweet Valley High' is fantastic, fabulous, a little bit campy, and - dare I say it - cinematic.
Diablo Cody
#32. He wasn't a carrier of commitment-phobia or other notable boy diseases and he used expensive moisturizer. That's about all it takes to bang my gong.
Diablo Cody
#33. The Ten Worst Songs to Strip To: 1. That Midnight Oil song about aborigines
Diablo Cody
#34. Juno MacGuff: You can never have too many of your favorite one calorie breath mints.
Diablo Cody
#35. Personally, I consider 'Titanic' the most brilliant example of successful counterprogramming; the film actually countered itself by embedding an epic chick flick within a classic disaster movie.
Diablo Cody
#36. I appreciate the positivity of those 'year of the woman' articles - it's good to get that energy out there - but at the same time, in Hollywood it's not happening yet.
Diablo Cody
#37. Tabloid photos capture people at their most self-conscious and disoriented; in real life, Paris Hilton is like an elegant paper crane.
Diablo Cody
#38. I don't think I ever got the hang of the writers' room. I love collaborating with people, but I really do my best work alone, and I think I would want to - if I did something again, I think I'd want to take total ownership the way Aaron Sorkin or David Kelley does.
Diablo Cody
#39. I've been watching 'American Idol' since its debut season in 2002. Back then, America hadn't yet evolved into a gladiatorial cybernation of bloggers, tweeters, and self-ordained voice coaches.
Diablo Cody
#40. Unfortunately I don't live by a Target now, so I just go to a regular Starbucks as opposed to a Starbucks nested inside a Target, which is my ideal situation. That works out for me. I like that white noise, those interruptions, and the people around me.
Diablo Cody
#41. The funny thing was that the sisters were hardly nubile, creamy-skinned Lolitas blushing on the bough. In fact, one of them looked like she'd beaten herself with a tire iron during a smallpox-induced hallucination, and the other looked like a close-up photo of a wolf spider.
Diablo Cody
#42. When I do encounter young women or aspiring filmmakers who tell me that I've inspired them or that my work means something to them, that's amazing. That's really exciting!
Diablo Cody
#43. If a woman chooses to work, people say, "Oh it's so sad that you're not at home with your children." But no one ever says that to a man because it's assumed that the man is going to be the provider. There's this double standard that exists and it really frustrates me.
Diablo Cody
#44. Of course, the strippers also take pains not to appear too innocent, valorous, or bookishly inclined. (In direct opposition to the Swayze Mandate of 1987, everybody puts Baby in a goddamn corner.)
Diablo Cody
#45. I always say when you write a book, you're a 'one-man band.' Whereas, when you finish a screenplay, it's just a sketch.
Diablo Cody
#46. The name fuse followed me from the book to the screenplay, and now I have to live with the name, which I chose in 30 seconds with no thought about how it might sound or what it might imply. It was just a funny thing.
Diablo Cody
#47. Ah, reality TV: where opportunists delight in exposing opportunism! It's kind of like the indie music scene.
Diablo Cody
#48. The Rolling Stones are so versatile, they're like the band version of that Infinite Dress they sell on QVC.
Diablo Cody
#49. When you're in a competitive environment, always give out the impression that you don't care. It makes people want you more. If you act desperate, it's over. I think a passive attitude is helpful. It comes naturally because I'm lazy.
Diablo Cody
#50. Judy Blume excels at describing how it feels to be invisible. So how poetic is it that Blume herself is suddenly everywhere?
Diablo Cody
#51. It's possible that I've matured as a writer, and I hope I've matured emotionally, but I always find myself revisiting these adolescent scenes.
Diablo Cody
#52. Now '90210' is returning with an all-new cast of slightly more plausible teens. I'll be honest: I wish the old cast was back. Ideally, this spin-off would be an Ice Storm-esque exploration of the West Beverly gang's bleak adult lives.
Diablo Cody
#53. You know, I did not like being famous. It was a stressful and ugly time, and I'm glad it's over.
Diablo Cody
#55. I don't know if I have some kind of defiance disorder or something, but if I'm hired to write something by "The Man," or by a studio, for whatever reason, it's really hard for me to finish. I inevitably wind up using that time to write something else.
Diablo Cody
#56. I've never even seen a great set fight or a great set meltdown. I seem to always be on these incredibly relaxed sets.
Diablo Cody
#57. And I think I'm an adrenaline junkie, and there's nothing that will spike your adrenaline more than sitting in a theater and listen to an audience react to something you've written.
Diablo Cody
#58. I had written the script for Juno and apparently Steven Spielberg had read it. I can't just call him Steven, that's weird ... Mr. Spielberg had read it and he liked it. He asked me if I would write this television show for him and I said, 'Yeah!'
Diablo Cody
#59. Everyone's favorite supper is a gluey carbohydrate-rich concoction known simply as "hotdish" and served in a community Pyrex.
Diablo Cody
#60. Juno MacGuff: I was out handling things way beyond my maturity level.
Diablo Cody
#61. I usually try not to think about actors while writing, because the odds of those stars aligning and you getting those specific people are so rare.
Diablo Cody
#62. The public's appetite for frothy, flippant blondes has waned, but Paris Hilton still fascinates me.
Diablo Cody
#63. The stuff I write isn't strictly autobiographical, but it's personal, if that makes any sense. It draws all these little incidents and people out of my life and then contorts them.
Diablo Cody
#64. The things that I write are autobiographical in a surreal sense, like when you have a dream and you go to the doctor's office, but then you turn around and it's actually your childhood home and the doctor has turned into Ryan Reynolds.
Diablo Cody
#65. I had the experience last year of directing my first feature while I had a 1-year-old son and while I was also pregnant, so I am now well aware of the difficulties women who are rearing children face when they're also trying to make headway in mainstream of film.
Diablo Cody
#66. A lot of people are concerned with staying physically young ... I'm more interested in maintaining my curiosity.
Diablo Cody
#67. The fact is, when I wrote 'Juno' - and I think this is part of its charm and appeal - I didn't know how to write a movie. And I also had no idea it was going to get made!
Diablo Cody
#68. I'm not an especially highbrow person, but I have always loved small, quirky, edgy movies.
Diablo Cody
#69. People don't have these tidy little redemption arcs in reality the way they do in movies.
Diablo Cody
#70. I'm glad that as a 33-year-old working mother, I can still choose to wear a Hello Kitty T-shirt or stay up late scrolling through the Twitter feed of my junior-high crush.
Diablo Cody
#71. Fact: The new '90210' is cooler than the old '90210.' It's the lithe, streamlined Skipper to the elder series' venerable Barbie. Gone are the traditional parents - they've been replaced by a hipster mom n' pop who get busted necking in the car.
Diablo Cody
#73. I spent a lot of time staring at the clock in school, so I have that kind of personality.
Diablo Cody
#74. I do not quote my own movies. I think I would be pretty insufferable if I did.
Diablo Cody
#75. I write small and weird. Romcoms are not in my skill set.
Diablo Cody
#76. I don't think coolness used to be such a commodity among adults. And now it is.
Diablo Cody
#77. I had gone to the bookstore, and while I hadn't bought any books on how to write a screenplay, I'd bought a couple of scripts so I could see how the formatting works. I just needed to know how a Hollywood screenplay looked on the page, which was something I was totally unfamiliar with.
Diablo Cody
#78. In the past, I'll admit, I've enjoyed being compared to the protagonists in my screenplays.
Diablo Cody
#79. For me, I am a huge fan of Sofia Coppola and Lynn Shelton. I love Lena Dunham, like everybody else. I love Kathryn Bigelow.
Diablo Cody
#80. Well, to aspiring writers, I would tell them that we live in a wonderful time where you're able to make your work visible, easily.
Diablo Cody
#81. I know white clothing is supposed to enhance that summer glow, but writers don't tan.
Diablo Cody
#82. I didn't even know how to talk to people, I didn't know how to talk to the press. I was just a jester. And I still feel that way. But, I mean, what haven't I learned? Everything that I know is new information because I was starting with nothing.
Diablo Cody
#83. It doesn't matter if they're in front of the camera or behind the camera. I know women who are producers who are surviving on nothing but juice and almonds.
Diablo Cody
#84. I can't write at night. For me, I'm programmed to believe that nighttime is for relaxation.
Diablo Cody
#85. I keep joking that I'm in Jason Reitman Film School, because I keep asking him questions every single day about directing and I have a list of things that he's told me to do and not do and I definitely couldn't learn from a better person.
Diablo Cody
#86. I've been told that I'm incompetent, socially retarded, maladjusted. I still know that I couldn't function in reality. Los Angeles is a good place for me.
Diablo Cody
#87. I don't know why, but I've always been a sucker for roller coasters in movies.
Diablo Cody
#88. I am actually able to do other things. I'm not just this writer.
Diablo Cody
#89. People have always wanted to be recognized, and that's human nature. But people used to want to be recognized for their accomplishments, and now they simply want to be visible.
Diablo Cody
#90. You definitely meet a lot of extremely powerful, successful, wealthy people in Hollywood who are extremely miserable.
Diablo Cody
#91. This is for the writers. I want to thank all the writers. I especially want to thank my fellow nominees, because I worship you guys. I'm learning from you every day.
Diablo Cody
#92. Put your blog out into the world and hope that your talent will speak for itself.
Diablo Cody
#93. Bren MacGuff: Well, honey, doctors are sadists who like to play God and watch lesser people scream ...
Diablo Cody
#94. I think when you take people who are damaged and you give them money and freedom, it can be a toxic cocktail.
Diablo Cody
#95. Even though I am in this weird position of being a semi-recognizable screenwriter, which isn't that common, at the same time, I'm not an actress. I'm pretty isolated.
Diablo Cody
#96. Juno MacGuff: Thanks a heap coyote ugly. This cactus-gram stings worse than your abandonment.
Diablo Cody
#97. Los Angeles is often described as the nadir of vapidity, a smog-choked space cradle.
Diablo Cody
#98. I think sometimes people really require the satisfaction of closure.
Diablo Cody
#99. People say 'teenage girls aren't so clever. Your characters should be less articulate to reflect our youth.' People who say that aren't spending time with teenagers.
Diablo Cody
#100. Love is mysterious and rad, like Steve Perry from Journey
Diablo Cody
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