Top 100 Quotes About Your Girlfriend
#1. If you make your best friend and your significant other the same person, you don't have to disconnect to go tell your girlfriend everything.
Niecy Nash
#3. I'm not a militant lesbian. I carry myself in a way that makes it easier for women to relate to. I can be your best girlfriend.
Jackie Warner
#4. Girlfriends are not wives. I draw the line at married women. Actually, women married to men with guns. If someone's girlfriend wants to make herself available, that's her business. Just don't give my name to your boyfriend.
Jack Dancer
#5. how you would feel if your old girlfriend showed up and she had the IQ of a frog. You'd
Bobby Adair
#6. When your girlfriend broke your heart, don't even say a word, just smile because she gives you the opportunity to find someone better than her.
Werley Nortreus
#7. No relationship is perfect nor will anyone ever be the best boyfriend or girlfriend. Long as you put in the effort and try to make your lover happy. That's all we can ask for.
Kevin McCarty
#8. What would you call your decorating style?" I asked. "Boring-bachelor? Or messy-loner? He looked over at me. "More like distracted-about-my-detainee-girlfriend," he said.
Katie Kacvinsky
#9. I don't think your girlfriend likes me." Putting on the most bored face I can muster, I add deadpan, "I'm torn up." Shaking his head at me, he mutters, "Yeah, I can see that.
Belle Aurora
#10. Are you saying you want to be my girlfriend?" His voice was gruff, almost teasing.
I leaned into him and whispered against his lips. "Are you saying you want me to be your girlfriend?"
"Fuck yeah," he whispered back, and pressed his mouth to mine.
Samantha Young
#11. You can go the route of not living your life at all - and a lot of actors do that, where they just won't even go out of the house at all - but it makes life so unenjoyable. You can't go out, you can't hold hands with your girlfriend, you can't do any of these things.
Austin Butler
#12. I have no reasons to be unhappy today. Normally, when I pick my mother up from the police station I go to the gym as soon as it opens and smash the bag for a while. This morning, however, I woke up to your pretty face and I remembered that you are my girlfriend.
Skyla Madi
#13. I got into this business through my girlfriend Denisha. She's a specialist, provides a service for clients who find it hard to connect with women. Just 'cause you're housebound or in a wheelchair, doesn't mean your sex drive's gone.
Sarah Lotz
#14. And so we go and I meet his parents. And it's a very strange thing meeting your girlfriend's boyfriend's parents for the first time. Part of you is angry for obvious reasons and part of you still wants to make a good impression. On a side note, they seemed in perfect health.
Mike Birbiglia
#15. Someone you considered a friend will kick you to the curb because you stop hanging out so much with the fellas to be with your girlfriend. Prioritize your relationships and you will discover who your real friends are.
T.D. Jakes
#16. I'm aware, as a sane person, that I'm not the best-looking guy in the world. I'm aware of it. But when I go into a party, I will walk out with your girlfriend.
Gene Simmons
#17. That is one fireball of a girlfriend you got there. The OR team was drawing straws to see who would go out and update her and your family. I think she actually had them scared.
Jay Crownover
#18. If you're going to be a musician's girlfriend, you have to know that your man will always love his bandmates in a way you can't even touch, because they are the guys who help him create music. You can only help him create a living human being, with your dumb uterus.
Julie Klausner
#19. Cause if you were my girlfriend and a stud like me was livin' in your house, I'd kiss you in front of the guy every chance I got as a reminder.
Simone Elkeles
#20. Is it a bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend makes you say things like, Satan is a myth ... I guess.
Dov Davidoff
#21. What are you gonna say?" Emma asked. " 'I'm not sure I want you back, but I'm sure I don't want your ex-con ex-girlfriend to have you, either'? Yeah. That'll start this little triangle off on the right foot.
Rachel Vincent
#22. Valentine's day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine's Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone's like 'Oh, happy valentine's day!' I even got a Valentine's Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having sex years ago!
Greg Giraldo
#23. God, you're so fucking arrogant. You think I want to be your girlfriend or something?"
... "I don't care what you call yourself. Titles are irrelevant to what I want with you.
Tessa Bailey
#24. If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of have to root for your team. They don't have a choice.
Jimmy Fallon
#25. Yeah, he's taking this little kid home." I let the sarcasm drip. "At least I won't whine like a spoiled brat, unlike you, you bleach-blonde brainless moron. Really, Officer Dan, I am sooooo disappointed in you. This is your girlfriend? Really? I thought you had better taste than this.
Apryl Baker
#26. He said I was a pretty little thing."
I kiss her again. "You are."
"He called me a broad."
Another kiss. "He did."
"He said I was your girlfriend."
I kiss her once more, this time deeper. "I heard.
J.M. Darhower
#27. Whatever happens, we've got your back, girlfriend! Unless, of course, the crowd gets mad and decides to tar and feather us. Then, I'll be leaving you in the dust!
Rachel Renee Russell
#28. It's always dope being able to perform with your girlfriend and get money with your girlfriend.
Meek Mill
#29. I still don't have any crushes on actresses or models. It's always been one of those things with girlfriends. They say, "Who's on your list?" What do you call it, the Get Out of Jail Free card?
Henry Cavill
#30. Covered in tats and can't take your girlfriend getting a simple script. I'll be finished in a minute, Mate."
Travis' frown deepened. "Wife. She's my wife.
Jamie McGuire
#31. It's amazing how people can sound like retards when they're talking to their girlfriend, especially if they really love her a lot. Because when you're just fucking someone you make a point of keeping your cool, but when you're really in love - it can sound pretty repulsive.
Etgar Keret
#32. It's like getting your girlfriend pregnant, you can't unscrew her.
Ben Lopez
#33. You throw the kitchen sink at your early books. You put everything in there. It's like when you meet a new girlfriend or boyfriend, you tell them all your best stories. By the time you have been married for 10 years, they are crying, 'Shut up!'
Mark Billingham
#34. Find out if your girlfriend is a feminist before you get too far into it. Some of them are pretty. They don't all look like Bella Abzug.
Phyllis Schlafly
#35. Don't tell your parents you're gay and I'm not your girlfriend. Tell them you're gay because someone is your boyfriend."
"Can I tell them it's that hot guy on Teen Wolf?
Avon Gale
#36. When you're a teenager, you want to meet a lot of girls - you want to get the most girls. You don't know anything about respect; you don't know anything about being faithful and loyal to your girlfriend.
Nas
#37. On Friendship
You got good friends. I like them. I don't think they would fuck your girlfriend, if you had one.
Justin Halpern
#38. I feel like for me the lyric writing really comes from just what's going on in my heart and that's what consumes me; think a lot of our heart is relationships. Not just with boyfriend or girlfriend but all your relationships in your life with other people and our interactions with other humans.
Amy Lee
#39. When you have a Thai girlfriend, you never lose her ~ you just sometimes lose your place in the queue
Warren Olson
#40. Happiness is when you see your husband's old girlfriend and she's fatter than you.
Croft M. Pentz
#41. Appearance is something you should definitely consider when you're going out. Have your girlfriend clip your nails or something like that.
Usher
#42. Isaac, tell your girlfriend she can't bring weapons into holy-shit-your-spider's-on-fire!
Jim C. Hines
#43. Nothing says 'classy' like posting bond for your girlfriend so you can escort her to a black-tie dinner.
Linda Morris
#44. I think that my regrets mostly have to do with my relationship with my ex-girlfriend. Every once in a while, you get those flashback memories of conversations you had with your exes, and you just, like, wince when you're walking down the street. Something occurs to you, 'Oh, no, I said that.'
Mike Birbiglia
#45. Does that new man in your life call his ex "a slut", "a whore", "a bitch", "psycho" , "crazy", "a nutter" etc etc. Chances are, whatever he's calling his ex right now, he'll be calling you when things don't go his way. Be warned.
Miya Yamanouchi
#46. Family time was hard when it was your own family, it had to be twice as hard when you were the girlfriend.
Jennifer Close
#47. True love is hard to find, sometimes you think you have true love and then you catch the early flight home from San Diego and a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend
Luke Wilson
#48. A girlfriend went on a couple of dates with a guy who criticized the color of her nail polish. She said, "The suggestion department is closed for the evening, but fax your idea tomorrow and we'll file it right over there in the suggestion box." (Then she pointed to the kitchen trash.)
Sherry Argov
#49. And on this night, the last of its kind before we get married to each other at the stroke of 8 tomorrow in the evening, as I walk towards my bed to call the day off, the last puff of wind brought from a fairy-tale land urges me to write this letter as your girlfriend, for one last time.
Debalina Haldar
#50. By loving you,
I learn everything
because your soul
contains the entire universe.
Kamand Kojouri
#51. Not your girlfriend?" Grandmother guessed. "Well, she should be, you dolt! Don't let her get away. You need strong women in your life, if you haven't noticed. Now, to business.
Rick Riordan
#52. I think whenever we think of our hometowns, we tend to think of very specific people: with whom you rode on the school bus, who was your next door neighbor you were playing with, who your girlfriend was. It's always something very specific.
Joyce Carol Oates
#53. I thought that one was going to hit me," I said, watching the disappointed girl stalk off into the crowd. "Being your girlfriend is dangerous."
"What can I say? I'm a magnificent specimen of manhood. Of course they all want me. But I do appreciate you protecting my honor.
Kylie Scott
#54. I see you brought along your violent little girlfriend. What a nice surprise! - Saint Dane (The Reality Bug)
D.J. MacHale
#55. Trying to shoot your girlfriend is a pretty solid way of saying 'It's Over
Kelley York
#56. Just for the record, a nymphomaniac girlfriend might be great material for imagination, but in real life, trust me, having a nympho in your bed night after night is not as fantastic as it sounds. At worst, they are sick; at best they are exhausting, and in both cases they wear you out.
Carol Vorvain
#57. You only lie to two people in your life, your girlfriend and the police.
Jack Nicholson
#58. You know your girlfriend is too young when she'll do everything in bed but go upside down because it's too scary.
Daniel Tosh
#59. You think it hurts your feelings that girls talk about you behind your back, until they tell you to your face. And they each wanted a turn. Every time, it started with 'girlfriend' and ended with 'bitch.
Jennifer Echols
#60. Now how about you man the fuck up, put your big girl panties on and go get your fucking ex- girlfriend back.
Karina Halle
#62. She was the kind of girlfriend God gives you young, so you'll know loss the rest of your life.
Junot Diaz
#63. You didn't tell Summer about it, did you?"
"What?" Gage scoffs. "Yeah, telling your girlfriend the Angel of Death might visit her if some switch is flipped is normal pillow talk.
Laura Kreitzer
#64. Won't you be my girlfriend
I'll treat you good
I know you hear your friends when they say you should
'Cause if you were my girlfriend
I'd be your shining star
The one to show you where you are
NSYNC
#65. The thing about impressing your girlfriend is that when you do something like a private island in Fiji, it's all downhill from that point.
Kevin Hart
#66. You can put a girlfriend on a motorcycle, yes, but what about your children and your bridesmaids, and your mother-in-law?
Anne Fortier
#67. Everyone, whether you are married or have a boyfriend or girlfriend, there's always someone who has a hold of your heart. You learn to let it go, but there's always a place in your heart. For me, it was someone I went to college with and we had an amazing bond, but I left.
Kip Moore
#68. Men, if you're traveling with your wife or girlfriend and she mentions that it's time to start looking for a restaurant, you need to sit up and take notice. This means her blood sugar level has dropped and, for you, it ought to be a red alert with flashing lights and sirens. Get that woman fed!
John Gray
#69. It's rude to discuss your wife with your girlfriend
Robyn Carr
#70. Who's my date" the Colonel asked.
*You're girlfriend is your date"
"All right" he said, and then deadpanned "but we don't get along very well
John Green
#71. We have a saying in my house, my kids and my girlfriend. We say, 'Be your best for the greater good, and rock out wherever you are.'
Michael Franti
#72. I've always felt it's ridiculous to say, of any of the females in my life: You're my friend, you're my wife, you're my girlfriend, you're my co-worker. This is your box, and you're not allowed to stray outside of it.
Jack White
#73. You told me, girlfriend. Will your boyfriend be jealous we're tossing bitchy banter back and forth?
Lorelei James
#75. You should change your Password"
"not exactly a priority so I haven't got'round to it"
"I'll do it for you"I offered.
His arms gave me a squeeze and he grinned.
"What'll you chose?"
before I could stop my mouth from forming the words, I said "Shebitchfromhell666
Kristen Ashley
#77. So, you're Bianca? The freshman bitch that's been screwing my boyfriend?"
"Your boyfriend? I haven't been-"
"Stay the hell away from Jake.
Kody Keplinger
#78. Solomon's Laws:
8. If a guy who's smart, handsome, and rich invites you and your girlfriend to a nudist club ... chances are he's got a giant shmeckel.
Paul Levine
#79. My girlfriend said, Emo, I'm seeing another man. I said, Well, try rubbing your eyes or something.
Emo Philips
#80. Your life and everything about your world should be represented on your social media accounts, and everybody feels that way from family to friends to boyfriends and girlfriends.
Aeriel Miranda
#81. It's a bonus if your girlfriend likes your music - definitely not a downfall.
Ashton Irwin
#82. It just gets frustrating playing the girlfriend, It's just this awful feeling, sitting in your house, waiting for a script to come. I like to be more proactive.
Joey Lauren Adams
#83. On Friday night, if you want to go out on a date with your wife or your girlfriend, nothing on Netflix competes with that, right? Because you're getting out; that's what you're doing. If you don't want to put your shoes on, nothing in the cinema competes with the worst thing on Netflix.
Ted Sarandos
#84. You know how on Christmas day, the day feels different, even if you're just sitting in your chair waiting for your girlfriend to put her face on and you haven't even started any of the festivities yet, the day still feels different. The electrons are fatter and pushier.
Bill Callahan
#85. You might be a redneck if you go Christmas shopping for your mom, sister, and girlfriend, and you only need to buy one gift.
Jeff Foxworthy
#86. Dora appeared, placing Alex's coffee in front of him."Your girlfriend is a wonder, honey,"she siad to him, squeezing willows shoulder. Willow's smile turned strained at the word "girlfriend. He could see her wanting to correct the woman and then deciding to let it pass.
L.A. Weatherly
#87. Not godlike at all, but more like a sociapathic, bipolar ex-girlfriend who loses her shit, burns all your jeans and then blames you for making her do it.
Heather McVea
#88. A single girlfriend can play an important role in success of your career but a bunch of girlfriends can seriously ruins your successful life.
Wiz Khalifa
#89. Bad sign when the thought of your x-girlfriend sends you reeling in a search for new adjectives to describe stupidity and thoughtlessness?
Dov Davidoff
#90. When the picture your girlfriend conjures up in your head is of a cartoon skunk, reconsider the relationship.
Jackson Galaxy
#91. From Shane's Point of View:
Jester talking to Shane:
"What's the matter? You afraid you'd bite your skinny little girlfriend?" Jester laughed. "She's already someone else's, you know. I can smell the bite on her. He's marked her."
Myrnin.
"Shut up," I said, and kicked him in the face.
Rachel Caine
#93. Your girlfriend is a narcissistic bitch, and you're an indecisive coward. Congrats on creating a little human that's perfect.
Tarryn Fisher
#94. You actually fucked her? What, did her forked tongue feel exceptionally good on your dick or something? - Keely to Jack after meeting his ex-girlfriend.
Lorelei James
#95. It's one thing to be a high achiever; it's quite another to privately sneer at your girlfriend's friends after feigning friendliness because they have the "misfortune" to drive a bus for a living.
Mallory Ortberg
#96. I think behind every great man there's got to be a great woman, whether she's your wife, your girlfriend or not. I'm not gonna say that there's not that special girl out there. But I'm in the music biz, and I'm focused on the music.
Prince Royce
#98. Sometimes I pretend not to look at my own characters, because that's like different people getting off with your girlfriend or something.
Grant Morrison
#99. Believe me,' [ ... ] 'I would know about it. That's the difference between me and your girlfriend. I am the jealous type. I am the Spanish Inquisition when it comes to being fucked around on. No quarter will be given.
Jonathan Franzen
#100. A night spent spooning with your girlfriend isn't nearly so exciting when your uncle is curled up against your other side.
Mike Mullin
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