Top 100 Quotes About Gag
#2. For another thing, we're under martial law, so I can do very nearly whatever the fuck I want. Including march through your precious little ship there towing you along behind in a ball gag and lacy underwear. So your warrant bullshit? You can roll that up and fuck it. Now tell me why I'm here.
James S.A. Corey
#3. Cyrus's momma thinks I'm a gift from God. I didn't have the heart to tell her if I was then God was guilty of handing out gag gifts, Joyce said.
Carolyn Brown
#4. I need to gag you and tie you to the bed, he declared.
Oh God.
Awesome.
Kristen Ashley
#5. For the first time since hearing about the Treaty of Versailles in detail, Mondaugen found himself crying. They'll drain his juices, he thought; caress his bones with their paw-pads, gag on his fine white hair.
Anonymous
#6. I would like to thank the people who encouraged me to draw army cartoons at a time when the gag man's conception of the army was one of mean ole sergeants and jeeps which jump over mountains.
Bill Mauldin
#7. I honestly do feel - and I hope I don't gag anybody if they read this - but I feel like I'm one of the luckiest people in the world.
Jonathan Banks
#8. A page a day means I need to focus on a gag a day, and that's great for laughs but bad for plot, and I'm primarily a plot guy.
Doug TenNapel
#9. Her favorite foods made her gag, like old friends she hadn't seen in years turning up looking all wrong.
Joyce Carol Oates
#10. Tell me why it is that a toddler will gag over a perfectly wonderful breakfast of ham, eggs, biscuits, juice, and jelly. But then he will enthusiastically drink the dog's water and play in the toilet. Truly, he is his mother's greatest challenge ... ; and her most inexpressible joy.
James Dobson
#11. Tough guys toughen up when faced with adversity. So he flexes his gag reflex and steps inside.
Bradley Sands
#12. I beg your pardon. I'm not gross. (Simone)
Grody to the max. Gag me with a spoon. I've seen you in the mornings. You're not exactly well coiffed. (Jesse)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#13. I'm glad she's so smitten with her new huntsman boyfriend and all, but venison-wurst? Gag me with a harpsichord.
Nicki Elson
#14. children from the same womb would share the same precious blood." I gag.
Tara Brown
#15. I need a sound-proof room to tie up the inner critic, gag her and nail the door shut. But she keeps escapping. Poor knots and short nails.
Judy L Mohr
#16. What I really wanted more than anything was to put my boss on the floor and stand on his throat and watch him gag.
Scott Carrier
#17. Money is a terrible blab; she will betray the secrets of her owner, whatever he do to gag her. His virtues will creep out in her whisper; his vices she will cry aloud at the top of her tongue.
Edward Bulwer-Lytton, 1st Baron Lytton
#18. If a footballer presents himself as a family man and goes and has sex with a prostitute, should he gag her?
Nicky Campbell
#19. I read every book about Buster Keaton and Chaplin to see how they worked - it's all about dedication, tunnel vision, pursuit of perfection, getting the gag right.
Paul Merton
#20. Broccoli, when overboiled, produces a sulfuric stench that causes children to gag the instant they enter the house.
Kate Christensen
#21. Shall I gag you, or are you capable of being silent without my assistance?
Sarah J. Maas
#22. Jairo's response came immediately. 'Yippee! Don't bring your neighbors. Gag.' Doug
Darien Cox
#23. If I'm the president, we're going to have emergency-room care, we're going to have gag orders.
George W. Bush
#24. The handkerchief is the universal utensil of the seasoned traveler. It can be a sanitizing device, a seat cover, a dust mask, a garrote, a bandage, a gag, or a white flag. One may feel well-prepared with nothing but a pocket square.
Josiah Bancroft
#25. The Hillary team is driving around in a van. Sometimes people get those gag bumper stickers put on their van. Hillary has one on her van, and it says, 'If this van's rockin', I'm deleting emails.'
David Letterman
#26. I am beginning to realize that taking the self out of our essays is a form of repression. Taking the self out feels like obeying a gag order
pretending an objectivity where there is nothing objective about the experience of confronting and engaging with and swooning over literature.
Kate Zambreno
#27. I suggest you leave now, or you'll be tied down and gagged until the end of this meeting."
"Tie us down?"
"And gag you," Joseph cheerfully reminded them.
Laura Kreitzer
#28. Presenting the Oscars was the most nerve-racking job I have ever done in show business. It's very much a live show: they have comedy writers waiting in the wings, and as you come off between presentations, they hand you an appropriate gag to tell.
Michael Caine
#29. What he brought out was a wooden gag they put in someone's mouth before doing something drastic, like cutting off a leg.
Megan Whalen Turner
#30. But the only game she wanted to play was Kidnapper, where she tied me up and left me in my own tree house for about twelve hours, until Dad climbed up and got me down. Why hadn't I at least called for help? I had. But no one had heard me. Probably because of the gag in my mouth.
Douglas Rees
#31. At the table just to get a laugh out of the younger children present (meaning Annabelle and me). For the record, I do not actually laugh when Elkin passes gas; I gag and it comes out as a laugh. Annabelle, I cannot vouch for. Good
Wendy Mass
#32. The modern horror audience is wise to our tricks this lets it in on the gag.
Robert Englund
#33. We could take his gag away, thought Isaac, and he wouldn't scream ... but then he might speak ... He left the gag in place.
China Mieville
#34. A cute nickname was the first mile marker on Gag Highway, heading straight to Relationshipville. And making up the names of fake roads and cities to express your unhappiness was probably the first step to insanity.
Emma Mills
#35. I'm not the guy to ask about politics. I'm a gag writer.
David Mamet
#36. The Oscars Ceremony: a great workout for the gag reflex
Dean Cavanagh
#37. My role is almost a sight-gag. I have to be a woman to sing the lyrics "I am a man" to have it be a joke. I start the lyric in a male-register and a whole coloratura up into a soprano. And other points in the show ... like the guy who likes to be treated like a baby and wear a diaper!
Max Von Essen
#38. I apply the three gag rule, which is if I can read a script without gagging more than three times, then maybe I can say yes to this job.
Peter Riegert
#39. I'm an author whose strength is in gag-writing.
Jeff Kinney
#40. Step 4: Cough and gag. Step 5: Repeat Step 4 until it feels like maybe your lungs aren't inside your body anymore. Step 6: Remember that a really cute boy is beside you, so try to cough in a far more attractive manner.
Ally Carter
#41. I'm just doing what I have to do. I don't have a choice."
"Yeah, good luck going to bed with a guilt-free conscience with that sorry-ass excuse."
The sour expression evaporated from Mr. Greek's face. His gaze switched back to the computer. "Keep talking and I'll gag you."
"Blow me.
Santino Hassell
#42. (Derek) "How do you see the beauty in a three-eared dog but not in a guy with big teeth?"
(Christy) "Dogs rule. People drool."
(Derek) "Only if you gag them.
Lisa Henry
#43. Caught in a bad romance. Whoaaa-oh-ooooh!"
Nellie wailed along to the XM radio blaring from the enormous speakers.
"Can I uncover my ears now?" Dan called from the back, where he was reclined across the leather seat. "Has Nellie stopped her Lady Gag Me impression?
Rick Riordan
#45. Sometimes, you start with the drawing and then the gag comes to you in the middle of it. That is when you start working on the solution of the gag, which is composition, placing, equilibrium, and character design.
Sergio Aragones
#46. I will not be a sight gag for anybody. I will not do anything degrading to myself or other fat people.
Darlene Cates
#47. Jason caught a glimpse of Piper serving drinks at the next table. She discreetly put her finger to her mouth in a gag me gesture, then went back to flirting with dead guys.
Rick Riordan
#48. There is a lot of rubbish written about toilet humour - people saying it is childish and pretending it is beneath them - but there is no doubting the effectiveness of a really good willy gag.
Adrian Edmondson
#49. Hey, you're lucky. My cabin is closest to the stables. I can hear her yelling all night: FIRST PLACE OR DEATH! AN A MINUS IS A FAILING GRADE! Leo really needs to design a gag that's better than my old sock.
Rick Riordan
#50. He cannot speak clearly if his words must be strained through a Congressional gag.
Doris Kearns Goodwin
#51. My mother was always the one with the dark, really filthy sense of humor. She was a vulgar woman. She used to tell me to do comedy before I even tried it. She was always up for any gag.
Doug Stanhope
#52. The strangest thing. I came to the end of other people so quickly. Each new person was like a glass of water, and at the beginning I was parched, but then each glass tasted a little worse, the water was grittier, and by the end even the first sip was enough to make me gag, you know?
Arthur Phillips
#53. Silas baked me a cake for my birthday. It was awful. I think he forgot the eggs. But it was the most beautiful chocolate failure I've ever seen. I was so happy that I didn't even make a gag face when I ate a slice. But, oh god, it was so bad. Best boyfriend ever.
Tarryn Fisher
#54. She laughed. "Oh, I like it. Don't we, boys?" All three men made appreciative sounds. I had the feeling they'd have sat up and begged if she'd told them to. Arf, arf. Gag me with a spoon.
Laurell K. Hamilton
#55. I thought she wanted out. We should've brought cuffs and a gag." Clare frowned. "What's wrong with you, Blake? This is a rescue mission, not a kidnapping.
Jayde Scott
#56. If I want to kiss you, I damn well will. If I want to fuck you, I'll do that too. And if you even think about telling me it's a mistake again, I'll gag you.
Anonymous
#57. She's in the closet." Bric and I exchange a glance. "I gagged her. I didn't fucking know what to do. I just - Goddammit. I just grabbed the ball gag from the drawer, hooked it on her, tied her hands behind her back, and threw her in our closet." "OK,
J.A. Huss
#58. If we can but tear the blindfold of self-deception from our eyes and loosen the gag of self-denial from our voices, we can restore our country to greatness.
Theodore C. Sorensen
#59. Sometimes you have to gag on fancy before you can appreciate plain, th' way I see it. For too many years, I ate fancy, I dressed fancy, I talked fancy. A while back, I decided to start talkin' th' way I was raised t' talk, and for th' first time in forty years, I can understand what I'm sayin'.
Jan Karon
#60. There is that stereotype of a nerd with the high pants and pocket protector and that kind of thing. That can sustain comedy for maybe a movie - hence the 'Revenge of the Nerds' franchise - but not for hopefully years on the air. It's a sight gag, not a story.
Johnny Galecki
#61. I've been known to slum it and shop in the gag-him-and-bag-him aisles, believe it or not.
Tammara Webber
#62. The gag rule is, is that if any program receiving United States funding for Family Planning cannot mention, cannot speak the word "abortion" in the Third World.
Eleanor Smeal
#63. Then, in the twentieth century, speed up your camera. Books cut shorter. Condensations, Digests, Tabloids. Everything boils down to the gag, the snap ending.
Ray Bradbury
#64. Nobody gets any fun out of baseball any more. I guess a kid's crazy not to be serious about it when he's drawing down $20,000 or $30,000 a year, and any smart-aleck gag you try may be your last. But what's life without a laugh?
Rabbit Maranville
#66. Redwyne does not give a fig, he thought, but Rowan looks fit to gag.
George R R Martin
#67. The strips I admire go farther than a gag a day, and take us into a special world.
Bill Watterson
#68. Dead. The words fall from my tongue and linger there like poison. A slow death hanging from my lips. I shake the thought away and swallow but I can still taste the remnants in the back of my throat. It's sour and I gag a little as tears swell behind my eyes.
Celia Mcmahon
#69. If the gag is complicated, you spend more time thinking about the way you're drawing it.
Sergio Aragones
#70. In America, they have this nauseating habit of calling the conductor 'maestro'. I always slightly gag when the cor anglais player goes, 'Maestro, can I discuss bar 19 with you?'
Charles Hazlewood
#71. What is it, you ask?" Kali said, trying to cover her surprise with nonchalant words. "I haven't thought of a name yet. Got any ideas?"
"Shit," the pirate said, said of. The gag made elocution difficult.
"That wouldn't impress anyone at the patent office.
Lindsay Buroker
#72. Fun biology fact: the neurochemical emotion known as "shame" originates in the gag reflex. Since I lack the latter, it explains why I have such a pathological lack of the former. Go ahead, ask Bill Nye, he'll tell you. It's science.
Hinata Yamimoto
#73. Whenever I catch a chunk of an Adam Sandler comedy on cable, it looks as badly shot and goofily tossed off as a Jerry Lewis gag reel once he hit the late downslide with 'Hardly Working' and 'Cracking Up.'
James Wolcott
#74. You are making me something, cow-woman, or is that just make believe and pretend, like your sex life?'
'I'm making you a gag, Mickey, so I can knit in fucking peace.
Amy Lane
#75. I enjoyed doing the gag covers better than the story ones because they were usually simpler. A cover based on an incident in the plot took a great deal of staging to tell a little story that was still part of the book. And it had to make sense on its own.
Carl Barks
#76. I suppose ye might give him a wee dram that would keep him quiet so ye could tell them he was gone. Or maybe lock him in a closet? Tied up wi' a gag if it should be he's got his voice back by then, he added. Germain was a very logical, thorough-minded sort of person; he got it from Marsali.
Diana Gabaldon
#77. What then did you expect when you unbound the gag that muted those black mouths? That they would chant your praises? Did you think that when those heads that our fathers had forcibly bowed down to the ground were raised again, you would find adoration in their eyes?
Jean-Paul Sartre
#78. My fellow Americans, good evening. My name is Becca Goldman and I weep with all of you.
I texted one word to Megan, 'Gag'
She wrote back: 'My name is Becca Goldman, and I sleep with all of you
Jeri Smith-Ready
#79. One would have to say "in the end everything is a gag, etc" because everything is infinitely more than just a gag. The same applies to other "is"-statements such as "Laughter is an instant vacation"
Alfred Korzybski
#80. I am kind of a freak of nature who has loose joints, and I was able to put my legs behind my head, and it looked weird to people when I was a kid, so I kept doing it. It's a great party gag.
Doug Jones
#81. How do you gag the voice in your head that says, 'You don't have to go to the gym today. There's always tomorrow. C'mon, my friend, it's just one plate of curly fries. Yes, just for you!' (My inner voice reminds me of a particularly aggressive rug salesman at a Turkish bazaar.)
A. J. Jacobs
#82. Sometimes, but if you do it enough, it's harder to trip your gag reflex, which comes in very handy, if you know what I mean."
I did know what she meant, but somehow juxtaposing it with vomiting made the whole thing highly unappealing.
Elise Allen
#83. To my family and friends, I'm very definitely a clown. But do you know what? Doing a drama would almost seem easy because I wouldn't need to find that gag in a line.
Ashley Jensen
#84. If men are God's gift to women, then God must really love gag gifts.
Maya Angelou
#85. Laissez-faire, says the professor, when it often means bind and gag that the strongest may work his will. It is a plea for the survival of the fittest - for the strongest male to take possession of the herd by a process of extermination.
Theodore Roosevelt
#86. In the name of religious freedom, relativists have banished religion from the public square. They say they have to destroy public displays of religion in order to protect it. They response has been a culturewide gag order on Christianity in governmental and even commercial circumstances.
Robert H. Knight
#87. I want to gag sometimes when I see who "we" are recommending that people vote for, and not just as a libertarian.
Dave Barry
#88. Demons smell like ass - nasty ass that slithers down your throat, finds your gag reflex, and sits on it with authority.
Kevin Hearne
#89. Easy? You men have no idea what we're dealing with down there. Teeth placement, and jaw stress, and suction, and gag reflex, and all the while bobbing up and down, moaning and trying to breathe through our noses. Easy?Honey, they don't call it a job for nothin'!
Kim Cattrall
#90. I won't stop talking. I am a girl you have no control over. There is not a gag big enough to handle this mouth.
Kathleen Hanna
#91. It's like, when someone asks you how you are and even though you want to say that you feel like shit, that you're miserable, that you cry until you gag and spend most of your time imagining ways to kill yourself, instead you just say, 'Fine, thanks.
Aryn Kyle
#92. Nothing in the world is better suited to laziness than orthodoxy. If you gag your mouth, stop up your ears and put a blinder over your eyes, you can sleep peacefully.
Jacob Burckhardt
#93. 'Sex and The City' had very strong gag orders as to what we could say and not say.
Willie Garson
#95. Dutch isn't easy for the outsider to learn, because it's spoken from the back of the throat at the trigger spot for the gag reflex.
Augusten Burroughs
#96. Enjoy your life. God gave us our bodies as a gift. (Granted, to some of us it's kind of a gag gift, but that's okay too.) Wear what you want, love who you want, and have fun.
Ellen DeGeneres
#97. My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh.
Jim Davis
#98. Typically, I prefer to gag my own men. I'd never considered having them delivered to me that way.
Dez Schwartz
#99. - Little pussy like me still have bigger cock than the two of them, she say. She pull the gag out of Sacco mouth. - What you gonna do, Miss
Marlon James
#100. But it's hard to talk about art. Maybe there should be a law against it, some First Amendment gag order like crying fire in a crowded theater.
Stanley Elkin
