Top 100 Quotes About A Bar
#1. It takes a lot of guts to get up on top of a bar and dance.
Piper Perabo
#2. What?" She gasps. "Who did you do it with? You can't go out there and pick up some random stranger. Oh no, Carrie. You didn't. You didn't pick up some guy at a bar.
Candace Bushnell
#3. The sport of skiing consists of wearing three thousand dollars worth of clothes and equipment and driving two hundred miles in the snow in order to stand around at a bar and get drunk.
P. J. O'Rourke
#4. There were two display windows, one on each side of the door, and in the windows were ... well, books. What this street really needed was a bar.
Nelson DeMille
#5. I did all sorts of jobs after drama school - working in a bar, as a teaching assistant. I probably learned as much from them as I did at drama school.
Laura Carmichael
#6. E-flat walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve minors.
Various
#7. When you go to a bar that has a black light, everybody looks cool. Except for me, because I was under the impression that the mustard stain came out.
Mitch Hedberg
#8. Nothing smells worse than a mans restroom in a bar, well that's what the lady told me when I called her number from the wall.
Stanley Victor Paskavich
#9. I don't have the looks to compete at a bar, and I'm not that funny. So the last thing I want is to be in a situation where that's what I'm competing on. I'd rather be on OkCupid or Match, where I can write a 300-word essay about myself that's really good.
Sam Yagan
#10. The issue is privacy. Why is the decision by a woman to sleep with a man she has just met in a bar a private one, and the decision to sleep with the same man for $100 subject to criminal penalties?
Anna Quindlen
#11. You're lucky, spontaneous, and your guardian angel is overworked and way underpaid." "I know, right? My angel walks into a bar and the other angels are like, 'Oh shit, that's the poor sap that's got Jory Harcourt. Look at him, he started drinking again.
Mary Calmes
#12. I was in a bar and I said to a friend, 'You know, we've become those 40-year-old guys we used to look at and say, 'Isn't it sad?'
George Clooney
#13. I remember my agent at ICM at the beginning of my career telling me that I wasn't pretty enough, that I was always going to be a quirky sidekick. And he was an ogre of a man. He should have been carrying a torch. If he was in a bar, he couldn't have come near me, and then he was deciding my fate.
Whitney Cummings
#14. Three men had approached her at a bar, one asking if he could buy her a drink. Her reply had been, "Sure. Petrol, please. Unleaded.
Tessa Bailey
#15. Mobile has created a totally different dynamic for discovering apps. You're sitting in a bar, and your friend is taking some pictures, and then you ask what app they're using.
Kevin Systrom
#16. You know, there's a joke in there somewhere. A Highlander, a Viking, and a Samurai walk into a bar.
N.R. Walker
#17. I suppose the nearest equivalent to a bar mitzvah in terms of emotional build-up would probably not even be one's wedding day, but one's coronation.
Maureen Lipman
#18. Sometimes what I wouldn't give to have us sitting in a bar again at 9:00 a.m. telling lies to one another, far from God.
Denis Johnson
#19. A Roman centurion walks into a bar and orders a martinus.
The bartender says, "Don't you mean a martini?"
The centurion answers, "If I wanted a double I would have ordered it.
Harlan Wolff
#20. I think all of Manhattan has pretty much become a bar-slash-nightclub-slash-restaurant. There were always pockets of that. But now every corner of Manhattan is that.
Julian Casablancas
#21. Man went into a bar, he only had one arm. Guy sitting next to him said 'Hey, you've got your sleeve in my drink', man replied, 'There's no arm in it'
Tommy Cooper
#22. On our second date, she kissed me in a bar. I invited her home. We just caught the F train, which seemed like a good omen.
Alison Bechdel
#23. I'm not going to get drunk at a bar. There are younger girls who look up to me. So I do my best not to stray too far.
Ashley Greene
#24. I find it very difficult to draw a line between what's sex and what isn't. It can be very, very sexy to drive a car, and completely unsexy to flirt with someone at a bar.
Bjork
#25. A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, what'll it be? The duck doesn't answer because it's a duck.
Jodi Picoult
#26. There is a big difference between wishing you was doing something and the actual getting it done. And this wasn't no back room in a bar or glory hole where I didn't even have to look at who I was with. This was Kabe.
James Buchanan
#27. If you call someone up on a mistake - if the drummer's put an extra beat in a bar or something - you have a lot more authority if you can show them how to do it right.
Steve Winwood
#28. Two jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender says, "You guys better not start anything in here!
Various
#30. How the hell did he get himself into this position in the first place? Oh, yeah, some little woman approached him in a bar and said she paid him for sex.
Melissa Schroeder
#31. So there I was lying in the gutter. A man stopped and asked '"What's the matter? Did you fall over?" So I said "No. I've a bar of toffee in my back pocket and I was just trying to break it."
Chic Murray
#32. Achmed: Two Jews walk into a bar...
Jeff: No no no no no
Achmed: You don't let Jews in your bar? You racist bastard.
Jeff Dunham
#33. We have no healthcare and we have all the guns in the world, it makes you think twice before you start throwing punches in a bar.
Doug Stanhope
#34. I escape disaster by writing a poem with a joke in it:
The past, present, and future walk into a bar - it was tense.
Kelli Russell Agodon
#35. I don't want to rip away the security that people finally have; 18 million people now have healthcare; preexisting conditions are no longer a bar.
Hillary Clinton
#36. There's a strand of the data viz world that argues that everything could be a bar chart. That's possibly true but also possibly a world without joy.
Amanda Cox
#37. Clowns are vicious
they're all nefarious grins
and if you hung out with a bunch of clowns in a bar, pretty soon it would turn into a horror movie. Nefarious means evil. It's nothing to do with Rastas.
Jenni Fagan
#38. I've never found that getting physical is ever the best response in a bar. You just have to make sure you keep your distance, and if it gets to a point where it gets aggressive then the best thing to do is go get a bouncer and get the situation resolved intelligently.
Chuck Liddell
#39. How much of our literature, our political life, our friendships and love affairs, depend on being able to talk peacefully in a bar!
John Wain
#40. Every man in the back of their minds would like to own a bar or a racehorse.
Graydon Carter
#41. I love cities, I spend most of my life talking about cities. And the design of cities does have an effect on your life. You're lucky if you can see trees out of your window and you have a square nearby, or a bar, a cornershop, a surgery. Then you're living well.
Richard Rogers
#42. What factors external to the music itself can make it resonate for us. Is there a bar near the stage? Can you put it in your pocket? Do girls like it? Is it affordable?
David Byrne
#44. When you do 'Before Sunset,' you know while it's a limited audience, there was a very small group of people that love 'Before Sunrise.' You feel a certain pressure to make sure that you uphold a level of quality that has been a bar. You set a bar and you have to at least match it.
Ethan Hawke
#45. I wish there was a bar I could send opposing teams to and get them hammered or something - I could tell my buddies in New York to leave their places open or something. Playing for the Yankees, guys come at you extremely hard. I have to be ready or I'll be embarrassed.
Roger Clemens
#46. People can buy a bottle of gin and drink it at home for about a buck a drink, whereas they are willing to go to a bar and pay 12 bucks for the same cocktail. The difference is that man needs to be social. So I believe that there is a strong demand for games that are social.
Nolan Bushnell
#47. In terms of the creative side of it, it's really been a thing where you come up with the funny stuff is usually at a bar or out talking to people or whatever.
Trey Parker
#48. When you ask a girl out and she suggest a bar, you're answer shouldn't be great, I like that bar and they'll have the Rockets game on too.
Iliza Shlesinger
#49. People go to casinos for the same reason they go on blind dates - hoping to hit the jackpot. But mostly, you just wind up broke or alone in a bar.
Sarah Jessica Parker
#50. A man and a giraffe walk into a bar and they proceed to get blitzed. The giraffe drinks so much he passes out on the floor. The man gets up and heads for the door, at which point the bartender yells, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" "That's not a lion! It's a giraffe.
Barry Dougherty
#51. Incredibly, while these 18 to 20 year-olds cannot legally buy a beer, cannot purchase a bottle of wine and cannot order a drink in a bar, right now they can walk into any gun shop, any pawn shop, any gun show, anywhere in America and buy a handgun.
Al Gore
#52. When I was old enough to know better, I ate a bar of soap in the shape of the Muppets' Fozzie Bear, because I loved him so much I wanted to consume him, even if doing so made me ill. I didn't yet know the word 'foreshadowing.' Fozzie was the only first of many pop-culture icons I feel shaped by.
Emma Forrest
#53. Dead like slipped on a bar of soap or like Colonel Mustard in the library with the lead piping?
Nick Harkaway
#54. When you go into a bar, there are hundreds and hundreds of cameras in that bar - many of them installed by that bar. They might be checking something or taking a picture of you.
Astro Teller
#55. With screenplays, it's all about being as concise as possible. If you have a scene that's set in a bar, you just have to write, 'Interior: Bar.'
David Benioff
#56. Yeah, I am in love. I'm definitely in love. She picked me up in a bar, actually. She walked by and just looked at me and smiled and I went 'Hey' and she goes, 'Hey'. I was just like, 'Oh my God', she took my breath away.
Darren McMullen
#57. You smell like a bar," he said.
I thought, You smell like a library. But I wanted to have sex right then, so I said, "You smell like a poem.
Melissa Bank
#58. I'm like this wiry freak they pulled out of a bar two months ago and said, 'Let's throw it on the wall and see if it sticks.'
Paget Brewster
#59. I liked fetching the washing from the Moscrops', and my mother liked washing for Mrs. Moscrop better than for anyone else. That was because Mrs. Moscrop wrapped a bar of yellow soap in with the washing. There wasn't anyone else who thought of a thing like that.
Howard Spring
#60. The world is like a bar, we all fill our glasses the way we can.
M.F. Moonzajer
#61. Who the hell would attack the Steel Horse anyway? What was the thinking behind that? Here is a bar full of psychotic killers who grow giant claws and people who pilot the undead for a living. I think I'll go wreck the place.
Ilona Andrews
#62. The only downside to playing the violin is that you never know when you're going to be asked to play. I could be out to dinner or having a drink at a bar, and someone could just give me a violin, and I've got to be ready to play.
Charlie Siem
#63. You don't find the concept of illicit love at all engaging?"
"The concept, maybe. But in literature? That's like ordering a glass of tap water at a bar.
Nenia Campbell
#64. A locked-room problem lies at the heart of my new novel, 'In The Morning I'll Be Gone,' in which an RUC detective has to find out whether a publican's daughter who fell off a table in a bar that was locked from the inside was in fact murdered.
Adrian McKinty
#65. A wandering dog of a night wind came in off the sagebrush mesa carrying a bar of band music, and laid it on her doorstep like a bone.
Wallace Stegner
#66. French fry walks into a bar and says to the bartender, "Hey, could I get a beer please?" The bartender looks at him shaking his head and says, "No, we don't serve food here.
Various
#67. He couldn't stop the grin that spread across his face. Who knew Miss California would be good in a bar fight.
Codi Gary
#68. That winter he was invited to give a reading at the University of Massachusetts (Boston), but not a single person showed up. He sat in the silent lecture hall while his two sponsors gazed at their watches; finally Yates suggested they adjourn to a bar. He didn't seem particularly surprised.
Blake Bailey
#69. I'm more of a guy's girl. I like having a beer in a bar, and I don't bicker or sit down and do my nails.
Zoe Saldana
#70. Like I would buy a beer for some chick at a bar," he said, shaking his head. I held up my beer, and he pulled up one side of his mouth into a half-smile. "You're different.
Jamie McGuire
#71. But the Owners really valued the Crow's Nest partly as a cultural institution and partly because it gave them access to the sort of information about the lives, thoughts, and deeds of important persons that could only be had in a bar.
Neal Stephenson
#72. I bet a guy at a bar 50 bucks that I was more dysfunctional than he was. He raped me. So I tipped him. I'm very competitive.
Christopher Titus
#73. My dad and my uncles owned a bar outside of Cincinnati. I worked there growing up, mopping floors, waiting tables.
John Boehner
#74. No guy in the history of America has ordered a Smirnoff Ice at a bar without hating himself a little.
Jay Black
#75. Just before reaching the station, he turned into a bar
Haruki Murakami
#76. People used to complain that selling a president was like selling a bar of soap. But when you buy soap, at least you get the soap. In this campaign you just get two guys telling you they really value cleanliness.
David Brooks
#77. The reason why I don't have a hero is because heroes set a bar - whereas if we don't have one, our potential is unlimited.
Peter H. Reynolds
#78. I'm not confident in social situations; just going up to someone in a bar and saying 'Hi' is going to be even more difficult because they won't know the real me. They will just know me as a fictional person I play on the screen.
Benedict Cumberbatch
#79. Chic Murray once told me he fell in the street, and a woman said to him, Did you fall? He said, No, I'm tryin' to break a bar of chocolate in my back pocket.
Billy Connolly
#80. My cousin Louie, we walk into a bar, and he says, Dom, I think that waitress knows me. What do you think she knows, Louie? The fact that your belly came in four steps ahead of you?
Dom Irrera
#81. Most days, I have a slice of toast, then lie in a hot bath for an hour to get up a sweat. I have a sauna at the racecourse and then go and ride. On the way home, I might stop at a service station and have a bar of chocolate and a Diet Coke. And that's it, basically.
Tony McCoy
#82. If a faerie, a vampire, and a demon walk into a bar, you wait for the punch line. At Private Eye, when a faerie, a vampire, and a demon walk through the door, it's just another day at the office.
E.J. Stevens
#83. I don't go out to clubs. You'll never see me on a table at a bar, jumping up and down.
Lea Michele
#84. I've never been a huge prog fan. My background is punk. My background is learning how to play a bar chord and listen to Discharge records when I was a kid.
Justin Broadrick
#85. As I've said before, I never understand why people ski down a slope to a bar and then go on a lift so they can ski down the same slope again. That's like walking to the pub on a Sunday, then going home and walking to the pub again. Madness.
Jeremy Clarkson
#86. See how weak prose is ... Presently I shall go to a bar and there one or two poets will speak to me and I to them and we will try to destroy each other or attract each other and nothing will happen because we will be speaking in prose.
Jack Spicer
#87. You know I hate parties. With the passion of a televangelist on Sunday morning. I suck at small talk and mingling. Give me a booth in a bar and a few good friends, and I'm a happy girl. But parties suck.
Kristen Callihan
#88. When there's a painting in the room, my eye goes right to it. It's like if you go into a bar and there's a television on, you can't take your eyes off the television. Paintings have that effect on me. It's where my eye settles.
Joe Bradley
#89. Any shlub can pick up a girl at a bar. Want a challenge? Try keeping a beautiful woman happy for ten years running.
Peter Burke
#90. The reigning Miss Canada has been arrested for punching out another woman in a bar fight.Quite frankly, I think it's refreshing to finally find one beauty pageant winner who is against world peace.
Jay Leno
#91. You can find old Jewish newspapers from Detroit that have my promotional ad in them. It was a totally insane time in my life. Paul Rudd was also a bar mitzvah emcee, you know? It was like being a local rock star in Detroit.
James Wolk
#92. A drunk staggers out of a bar and sees a nun standing at a bus stop. He walks up to her and punches her in the face. When she falls to the ground, he starts screaming, "You're not so tough now, are you, Batman?
Various
#93. A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, sees a girl that catches his eye. Asks her if she wants another, they fall for each other and end up lovers. They laugh, cry, hold on tight and make it work for a little while, then one night her taillights fade out into the dark. And a guy walks into a bar
Tyler Farr
#94. The revolution I was starting where I thought I could yell at 200 people in a bar every night and change the world didn't quite happen.
Doug Stanhope
#95. Everybody talks about being a writer, angel. If every novel conceived on a bar stool made it into print, there wood not be one tree left standing on God's green Earth.
Irvine Welsh
#96. Hooking up with a tall, dark stranger in a bar wasn't anywhere on her to do-do list, but as she eyed those broad shoulders, the thick neck, strong-looking hands, and gorgeous mouth ...
What the hell, maybe he should be on the top of her "to-do" list.
Ophelia London
#97. There was a tendency by some to romanticize love, to make a fetish out of it. The poets made love seem like a bar of iron coming out of the furnace at the blacksmith's, red hot and staying so forever. Soto did not think much of such notions.
Ken Liu
#98. The best thing about being a cartoonist is to walk into a bar or someone's apartment and they don't know you, but they've taped one of your pieces up.
Ted Rall
#99. I'd come to see my rig for what it was: an elaborate contraption for deceiving my senses, to allow me to live in a world that didn't exist. Each component of my rig was a bar in the cell where I had willingly imprisoned myself.
Ernest Cline
#100. That young man seeks opportunities to test his principles as readily as a drunk picks fights in a bar.
Robert Harris
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