
Top 100 Drunk Me Quotes
#1. I give you my drunk permission to ignore whatever the sober me tells you. You should like the drunk me better, anyway, because I like you more than the sober me does.
R.K. Lilley
#2. Well I got a bad liver and broken heart,
yeah,I drunk me a river since you
tore me apart
Tom Waits
#3. Then I figured it would be a good plan to hire a few sailors to work for me, get them out to my yacht, get them drunk, commit sodomy on them, rob them and then kill them. This I done.
Carl Panzram
#4. I try not to laugh at the fact that even when she's drunk, she has a hard time saying it. "Where do you want me to take you?" She drops her head back against my chest. "You can just keep carrying me. It's very relaxing.
Jessica Sorensen
#5. My twitter fans are all pretty weird. A lot of them are kind of weirdly sexually aggressive. Some of them made me laugh and then I instantly tried to forget them, because I'd hate to find myself in a bar kind of drunk and accidentally use one.
Stephen Merchant
#6. Petition me no petitions, sir, to-day; Let other hours be set apart for business. To-day it is our pleasure to be drunk; And this our queen shall be as drunk as we.
Henry Fielding
#7. My sister is running away to get lost, but I am running away because I want to find something. And my parents love me so much that they want to help me. Yeah, Dad is a drunk and Mom is an ex-drunk, but they don't want their kids to be drunks.
Sherman Alexie
#8. I've been reading reviews of my stories for twenty-five years, and can't remember a single useful point in any of them, or the slightest good advice. The only reviewer who ever made an impression on me was Skabichevsky, who prophesied that I would die drunk in the bottom of a ditch.
Anton Chekhov
#9. I was drunk: Christian and drunk. They just don't go together. But that's what happened. And the next day, obviously God had honored those prayers and healed me of alcoholism.
Jim Hamilton
#10. So are you going to marry me or what?
He smiled that smile that had been making me feel something like drunk these past few months, and I felt all my sensibility and reason start to beat their wings as they prepared to fly away. Again.
Dorothy Koomson
#11. There's a long tradition of teen comedies where the kids are getting drunk on beer and whatever else, so smoking a joint to me is no worse than having a beer. So, if someone has a problem with it, I'll just tell them to relax.
James Franco
#12. Why are bodies so difficult to manage? Why? 'Oh, oh, look at me, I'm a body, I'm going to splurge fat unless you, like, STARVE yourself and go to undignified TORTURE CENTRES and don't eat anything nice or get drunk.' Hate diet.
Helen Fielding
#13. If it was up to me, I'd get more oil tanker drivers drunk. I don't value music much. I like the Beatles, but I hate Paul McCartney. I like Led Zeppelin, but I hate Robert Plant. I like the Who, but I hate Roger Daltrey.
Kurt Cobain
#14. Ever heard the phrase, 'candy is dandy but liquor is quicker?'"
Great she wanted to get me drunk.
"Ah ... ever heard of underage!"
"Where there's a will there's a way," she said, matter-of-factly.
"That's your great plan?
Jessica Shirvington
#15. Tonight, I won't dream, because nobody
has held me and no hands have strayed and even
though I'm drunk with love, my arms are empty.
Melissa Lee-Houghton
#16. You never see Beyonce stumbling out of a club drunk and on drugs without underwear on - nor do you see Justin Timberlake pashing 5 chicks in a club. You never hear them slagging anyone in the media ... They are composed and somewhat mysterious and that fascinates me!
Ricki-Lee Coulter
#17. I think that part of my success was the fact that I would literally threaten your life if you got in-between me and what I wanted to do with my music. I was so drunk and in-your-face and so ADHD and so unhinged that I kind of got what I wanted.
Richard Patrick
#18. Drink [the shot of tequila], Mia." He repeated, quietly, using my name this time. He leaned in close to me so that I could feel the heat of his body. "Believe me," His eyes locked on mine and in a hoarse voice he whispered, "you're going to want to be drunk for what I'm going to do to you tonight.
Donya Petrock
#19. She's still smiling her little smile, and it strikes me that, actually, she is drunk, not on alcohol, but on her St. Louis hopes and dreams. I wouldn't sober her up for anything, but she doesn't need me anymore. She can hang on to her dreams by herself now.
Tim Tharp
#20. I've been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library.
F Scott Fitzgerald
#21. My late unlamented father taught me one valuable lesson. 'Boy', he would say to me in the thick brogue of a champion drunk, 'the only way to fight is to fight dirty. The only place to hit is below the belt.
J.D. Robb
#22. You were drunk. I wanted to hear the words when you were of sound mind. Women get drunk all the time and confess their undying love to me.
Jodi Ellen Malpas
#23. Come! Come sit by me. It's a nice bench. Nice and lovely on the butt."
"You're drunk."
"Yeah, and you're ugly, but do I complain about it? No! Because I don't complain about things that I can't change. That's called intelligence.
Sara Wolf
#24. Oh you, unceasing sun, to me Your particles communicate The luminous essence of God, Are you our God? I do not know. Intoxicated, I say nought, Bewitched by the magic potion. I cannot differentiate Between my drunk and sober state.
Rumi
#25. I remember only images, snapshots burned into me, bleeding into each other until I no longer knew the order in which they had happen.
Laure Eve
#26. I could feel the muscles in my face twitch as his response sunk into me. It was a resounding no with a slap of you fucking drunk attached.
Cassandra Giovanni
#27. Scott: Friends don't let friends drive drunk. Nora: Are you trying to appeal to my conscience? Scott: How can you turn down a once-in-a-lifetime chance to drive the 'Stang? Nora: How about you sell me the 'Stang for thirty dollars? I can even pay cash. Scott: Drunk, but not that drunk, Grey.
Becca Fitzpatrick
#28. When I went out on tour as Bing Hitler I would hook up with Lenny and we'd get drunk together. He was always very supportive. He was a big star and a lot of what he said to me had power and impact. Apart from that, I just like him.
Craig Ferguson
#29. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to get me drunk," I said to Ranger.
"Not drunk," Ranger said. "Just relaxed and naked.
Janet Evanovich
#30. Shame on you. Don't tell me you've been married for an hour and you've already got eyes for another woman.
Mordecai Richler
#31. Unhappy man! Do you share my maddness? Have you drunk also of the intoxicating draught? Hear me; let me reveal my tale, and you will dash the cup from your lips!
Mary Shelley
#32. He patted my shoulder. "What's up with you? All of a sudden, you're bucking the system."
"i got drunk and had an epiphany."
"Shit, this is serious!" He gasped. "Last time that happened to me, i woke up gay.
J.C. Isabella
#33. Thick lashes lifted, a moment of pure clarity in the dark gray as Noah wrapped his arm around her waist. "Meant to ask you to marry me, put the ring in the plant soil, but gardener made me drunk. He's so small. What happened?"
Nalini Singh
#34. We live in the hope that life will be different. Just a little more substance perhaps in the intrinsic frailty of the days. Such resignation frightens me. Between gunshots I get drunk. In secret, all knowledge becomes anxiety.
Floriano Martins
#35. Look, this is an odd question, but you're kind of cute and you're pretty nice to me. Are you drunk? It's OK if you are.
Drew Carey
#36. My heart had made its decision and there was no going back. Still, it was hard not to be all bitter and betrayed over his announcement. I didn't even have the luxury of being able to get blind rotten drunk. And believe me, dealing with all this sober sucked.
Kylie Scott
#37. You do not really wish to hear more of the Battle of Kadesh. Let me say only that human fat, gorged in considerable quantity, has an intoxicating effect. I became ... drunk.
Norman Mailer
#38. I would drink that whole bottle if I knew it wouldn't get me completely drunk. I miss wine."
"Um, you haven't had it for one night, and you miss it?"
"Clearly, you underestimate my relationship with wine and what I do on the weekends when I'm by myself reading.
Rachel Van Dyken
#39. You are drunk, baby. Who made me drunk? I made you drunk, said the major. I made you drunk because I love you and because America is in the war.
Anonymous
#40. You came to a party, got drunk and got laid. Same as me. The minute you gave me more of you, I took it, wanted even more and I didn't keep that a secret, babe, and you fuckin' know it.
Kristen Ashley
#41. Faith is trusting Jesus to lead us and going where He leads. What avails it to me to analyze Saratoga water, and to believe in its virtues? I must drink the water if I want its purifying power. And the soul that has not actually drunk of Christ can never be purged from sin.
Theodore L. Cuyler
#42. There are people who have an image of me as being rude and inconsiderate. But I'm completely the opposite, because I was raised not to be. I might have been tripping over myself drunk, but I was always courteous.
Slash
#43. What white man has ever seen me drunk? Who has ever come to me hungry and left me unfed? Who has seen me beat my wives or abuse my children? What law have I broken?
Sitting Bull
#44. There is a communication of more than our bodies when bread is broken and wine is drunk. And that is my answer when people ask me: Why do you write about hunger, and not wars or love.
M.F.K. Fisher
#45. Nice try, sweetheart, but there's no way you're leaving me alone with a barely aware drunk chick. Who knows what she'll accused me of later? This time tomorrow, the cops could show up at my door, and before you know it, I'm rocking an orange jumpsuit, singing "Summer Loving" with a guy named Snake.
Candace Vianna
#46. I swear to you, I am the cheapest drunk on the planet. It takes nothing to get me loopy and doing stupid stuff. Yeah. Some of you like that? Well ... like riding an electric floor buffer for a shot of tequila. Did it!
Bill Engvall
#47. I have always smoked and drunk and loved too much. In fact I have lived not too long but too much. One day the Iron Crab will get me. Then I shall have died of living too much.
Ian Fleming
#48. When she spoke at last, I knew at once that she was rather drunk. "Seen something you fancy, Nancy? ... " she said.
I swallowed, unsure of what reply to make to her. She walked closer, then stopped a few paces from me, and continued to fix me with the same even, arrogant gaze.
Sarah Waters
#49. It made me giddy. It made me blush, worse than before. It was like liquor. It made me drunk. I drew away. When her breath came now upon my mouth, it came very cold. My mouth was wet, from hers. I said, in a whisper,
'Do you feel it?
Sarah Waters
#50. Your breasts. Your nipples. The insides of your thighs. I want you wet for me, baby. A little drunk and a whole lot wet.
J. Kenner
#51. Love me like Saturday night, like three glasses of champagne, like the room is spinning, like you're drunk on my love.
C.J. Carlyon
#52. I would hit a scene about my mother screaming at me during her breakdown, drunk or using pills, and she'd turn into a monster. Which she wasn't. She was a human: somebody who loved me and somebody with a problem.
Leigh Newman
#53. I never quite got the hang of the getting drunk & fondling the thighs [of all the cumbersome young males] business ... whether that makes me a gallant & proper gentleman, a cowardly wuss or an unadventurous prude, I cannot make out
Stephen Fry
#54. Because I'm too drunk to feel the pain if you hit me, and if you kill me I'll be glad to be dead.
Anthony Burgess
#55. You want to know what Classics are?" said a drunk Dean of Admissions to me at a faculty party a couple of years ago. "I'll tell you what Classics are. Wars and homos.
Donna Tartt
#56. What?" he asked. "You're staring at me funny."
"We're in the wrong movie," I confessed.
Lou Harper
#57. If a man can only write well when drunk, I'll tell him: get drunk. And if he tells me that his liver suffers with it, I'll answer: what's your liver? It's a dead thing that lives as long as you live, and the poems you'll write will live without a as long as.
Fernando Pessoa
#58. Maybe he was too drunk to hear me when I told him to stop. Maybe I didn't say it loudly enough. Maybe I didn't say it enough times.
Amy Hatvany
#59. He raised his brows. "You're drunk." "Am not!" He gave me a bland look. "A drunk's famous last words before they fall flat on their face.
J. Lynn
#60. And she doesn't have to worry about me, either. I don't need to drink to get drunk. I can get drunk on things like the tulip - and this night.
Betty Smith
#61. It's important that Oasis are rude about everybody and that they get drunk ... Fair enough. It's nice, isn't it? But it's nothing to do with me. They came to see us in Manchester and they were very pleasant boys. Very nice. I'd like to see that as a quote. Oasis are very nice boys.
Damon Albarn
#62. Shanna planted her hands on her hips.
"Getting drunk is not going to solve your problems."
"Aye, but t'will make me no' give a damn."(Robby)
Kerrelyn Sparks
#63. I'd rather him (Grover Alexander) pitch a crucial game for me drunk, then anyone I've ever known sober. He was that good.
Rogers Hornsby
#64. I make no excuse for what happened. Drunkenness is never more than a symptom, not an absolute cause, and I realize that it would be wrong of me to try to defend myself. Nevertheless, there is at least the possibility of an explanation.
Paul Auster
#65. I'm not drunk,' I said indignantly.
You were just dancing like some wood nymph five minutes ago. You took your shirt off and now you're latched onto me like a little monkey. So don't tell me you're in complete control of yourself.
Jennifer L. Armentrout
#66. I write as if I were drunk. It is a process of intuition rather than placing myself above my story like a puppeteer pulling strings. For me, it's a scary, chaotic process over which I have little control. Words demand other words, characters resist me.
Elif Safak
#67. sometimes
i just feel impossible.
like life wasn't meant
for me.
like it was an
interview
i showed up to
drunk out of
my mind.
Christopher Poindexter
#68. I been drunk most my life, don't ask me why.
Through ninth grade, I ain't go to high school,
... I went to school high.
Styles P
#69. In Manhasset you were either Yankees or Mets, rich or poor, sober or drunk ... You were 'Gaelic' or 'garlic, as one schoolmate told me, and I couldn't admit, to him or myself, that I had both Irish and Italian ancestors.
J.R. Moehringer
#70. Being drunk is a good disguise. I drink so I can talk to assholes. This includes me.
Jim Morrison
#71. Get in the fucking car. You're a mean drunk.
You haven't seen me mean, mama's boy!
I told you we're close!
Yeah, so are me and my asshole! Doesn't mean I'm going to call it twice a day!
Jamie McGuire
#72. Night clubs scare me. They're dark and they stink and they're dangerous and everybody's drunk.
David Letterman
#73. If I'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose,
If I'm not that arrow to the heart of you,
If you don't get drunk on my kiss,
If you think you can do better than this then I guess we're done.
Let's not drag this on,
Consider me gone ...
Reba McEntire
#74. Susanna, what you need is a man to look after you
a proper one, not a drunk or a philanderer
or sure as fate, you'll not be safe on this earth."
"Oh, nonsense, Nan. I had a man, and he didn't look after me at all, and now I'm just beginning to enjoy myself.
Judith Merkle Riley
#75. No one really needs to defend drinking. That's something that frustrates me as a comic: I have to play clubs where selling booze runs the business, so crowds get drunk and yell out a bunch of stupid stuff at me.
Doug Benson
#76. I used to lay drunk in alleys and I probably will again.Bukowski, who is he? I read about Bukowski and it doesn't seem like anything to do with me.
Charles Bukowski
#77. I got to my feet and brushed sand off the seat of my pants. 'How about you sell me the 'Stang for thirty dollars? I can even pay cash.'
He laughed, slinging his arm around my shoulders. 'Drunk, but not that drunk, Grey.
Becca Fitzpatrick
#78. Don't think I'm talking nonsense because I'm drunk. I'm not a bit drunk. Brandy's all very well, but I need two bottles to make me drunk.
Fyodor Dostoyevsky
#79. When I'm lying drunk at an airport the press call me Irish ... but when I win an Oscar, I'm classified as British.
Brenda Fricker
#80. They've drunk everything in the house, including a pitcher of African violet plant food I'd just mixed up and was stupid enough to leave on the counter."
Tremaine punched Eddie in the shoulder. "I told you it tasted weird."
Eddie shrugged. "Tasted okay to me.
Susan Elizabeth Phillips
#81. So you mean to tell me you won't fuck anyone you don't share some kind of deep emotional connection with? What a sad, depressing, truly horrible life you must lead ...
Dave Matthes
#82. At other times it feels like being mildly drunk, or concussed. There is a sort of invisible blanket between the world and me. I find it hard to take in what anyone says.
C.S. Lewis
#83. Shut up. I'm drunk and I'm trying to confess, so just let me do it, okay?
Jennifer Echols
#84. Let others seek renown in arms; For me wine's wars have greater charms: Then fill the bowl, boy; fill it high: 'Tis better drunk, than dead to lie.
Anacreon
#85. More wine," Lightsong said, raising his cup.
"You can't get drunk, Your Grace," Llarimar noted. "Your body is immune to all toxins."
"I know," Lightsong said as a lesser servant filled his cup. "But trust me - I'm quite good at pretending.
Brandon Sanderson
#86. I never could figure out how those people like Bukowski could be both carousers and writers at the same time, because to me writing takes as much destructive energy as it takes to be a really good professional drunk.
Dan Chaon
#87. Promise me one thing: don't take me home until I'm drunk - very drunk indeed.
Audrey Hepburn
#88. I offered you a choice, and you took it."
I shot him what I hoped was a truly scathing glare. "Some choice. I was dying. Some drunk shot me from a pickup. Why wouldn't I have just woken up with gonorrhea like every other girl of loose moral fiber?
Molly Harper
#89. She's like cold coffee in the morning
I'm drunk off last nights whisky and coke
She'll make me shiver without warning
And make me laugh as if I'm in on the joke
Ed Sheeran
#90. When I'm in pain I want everyone I love on the island with me, sitting around the fire, getting drunk on coconut milk, banging out a plan.
Melanie Gideon
#91. You told me the Utes were gonna kill you for it. And how would the Cotterell's know anything bout it? And come looking for you?" "Because Runs-With-Scissors was drunk and told everyone at the Crescent Junction tavern, that's why.
David J. West
#92. Nonfiction brought me back to earth and sobered me up whenever it seemed like I'd become too drunk on the lives and loves of imaginary people, but that doesn't mean it was any less thrilling or transporting, although it was often more illuminating.
Laura Miller
#93. Well, I've kept you waiting long enough, he said, peering at me from that distance which drinking adds between people and which, at odd turns in the evening, seems closeness itself.
Ray Bradbury
#94. Yep, my daddy was an undependable drunk. But he'd never missed any of my organized games, concerts, plays, or picnics. He may not have loved me perfectly, but he loved me as well as he could. (189)
Sherman Alexie
#95. If all we ever sang about was how happy we are, we would be lying to ourselves. People try to escape their problems by getting drunk, partying and dancing them away. What really heals me is to sit down and think, face the facts, then you can get over it and be happy
Amy Lee
#96. I'm done peeing now."
"Thank you for letting me know.
Jessica Park
#97. I've drunk Amazon's free Diet Coke. Nothing makes more sense to me than a company trying to make bookselling into a profitable business. I'm not anti-Amazon, and I'm not pro-publishers either. I'm pro-books.
Lev Grossman
#98. The goblins have been after me ever since I helped the Coven drive them out of Essex. (They were gobbling up drunk people in club bathrooms, and the Mage was worried about losing regional slang.) I think the goblin who successfully offs me gets to be king.
Rainbow Rowell
#99. Oh boy. Too drunk to hold on to a whiskey and Coke and the word "pretty." That's not a combination with a positive outcome. Not good at all. That's the secret password that usually leaves me trying to find a ride home in the morning.
Laurie Notaro
#100. I have nothing I want to ask you, and if I did, you would probably lie anyway."
"I'm drunk. Drunk people tell the truth."
"Like hell they do. Besides you're not that drunk."
"Then dare me something."
I snorted. "No, because I'm not that drunk, or stupid.
Elizabeth Morgan
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