Top 100 I'm Not Drunk Quotes
#1. I'm not drunk onstage, although I've done that a couple of times when I was younger. It's partly just the way I talk - I talk like somebody in a rocking chair. I'm your 150-year-old grandmother.
Dylan Moran
#2. I'm brighter when I'm not drunk; when I'm drunk, I lose part of my IQ.
Gaspar Noe
#3. The first time they'd met, in this very pub, he'd hit on her using so little finesse, she'd been forced to ask if he was kidding. Granted, they'd both had a few too many drinks that night, but nothing excused the line, "I'm not drunk, I'm just intoxicated by you." Nothing.
Tessa Bailey
#4. I'm not drunk,' I said indignantly.
You were just dancing like some wood nymph five minutes ago. You took your shirt off and now you're latched onto me like a little monkey. So don't tell me you're in complete control of yourself.
Jennifer L. Armentrout
#5. I'm not drunk, Andrew. I'm Percocet." "Ah. So dangerously relaxed?
Inger Ash Wolfe
#6. I'm not drunk," Cithrin said. "You aren't," Yardem agreed. "Then why can't I have another glass?" "Because that's how you stay not drunk.
Daniel Abraham
#7. I'm not drunk, just a little stoned.
Gerard Way
#8. I'm grateful for a lot of things. One is not being a drunk wreck. Or losing all four limbs in some ridiculous East Village bus accident that I was so destined for.
Augusten Burroughs
#9. Seriously, why didn't Brody or I know about the neighbors? It's not like I'm a dog. I'm not going to hump them in public." At Mike's look, he flushed. "For God's sake, I was twenty years old and drunk. The girl wasn't even real. It was a mannequin and it was all Brody's idea.
Marie Harte
#11. I jumped out of the way and Monique skidded across the floor like a drunk monkey on a skateboard and landed face-first in the puke. I hoped that popping sound was just the button on her halter top and not an imploded implant. That was a mess I wasn't about to clean up.
Barbra Annino
#12. I come from a family of communist nudists. I was allowed to do or not do what I liked. My parents were not interested in whether I went to school or got drunk on white wine.
Lars Von Trier
#13. T-shirt with the slogan Officer, I Swear to Drunk I'm Not God.
Paul Levine
#14. The earth is convulsed with a universal sob, and the roads are muddy with tears. But I do not call to mind a more touching picture of unavailing misery and ruin, and hopeless chaos, than the plug hat that has endeavored to keep sober and maintain self-respect while its owner was drunk.
Edgar Wilson Nye
#15. By the first mouthful I knew that I was going to get drunk that night. The drink tasted too good not to.
S.A. Tawks
#16. Do you guys ever reach the point of drunkenness where you're so drunk you're like "I better keep drinking to sober up" and then you're like "you know, I recognise that that is not how it works. But ...
Hannah Hart
#17. I had to be naked [in Vinyl], but I was almost more nervous about having to be drunk. The director wasn't going to yell, "Too big!," during the nude scene. For the drunk scene, you can be bad drunk or good drunk. We'll see. My wife was not happy, hearing about it.
Ray Romano
#18. I prefer to think that God is not dead, just drunk.
John Huston
#19. Faith is trusting Jesus to lead us and going where He leads. What avails it to me to analyze Saratoga water, and to believe in its virtues? I must drink the water if I want its purifying power. And the soul that has not actually drunk of Christ can never be purged from sin.
Theodore L. Cuyler
#20. I was a little drunk. Not drunk in any positive sense, but just enough to be careless.
"For God's sake," I said, "yes, don't you?"
"Oh, how charmingly you get angry," he said. "I wish I had that faculty.
Ernest Hemingway,
#21. I have always smoked and drunk and loved too much. In fact I have lived not too long but too much. One day the Iron Crab will get me. Then I shall have died of living too much.
Ian Fleming
#22. We were not actually famous, I have to add. People were just drunk.
John Duover
#23. You keep picking me up and carting me around," she muttered. "You know, when I'm not injured or drunk on my ass, I do have two perfectly functional feet."
"You are just so magnificently portable," he told her.
Thea Harrison
#24. If someone opens a glorious Scotch or a bottle of wine, it's no more than a whimsy, but after nearly 40 years I'm used to it. I don't find it difficult not being drunk when other people are, but I get uncomfortable because they're uncomfortable with where I am.
Martin Shaw
#25. I'd never kissed a girl before. Ever. And I never thought the first girl I kissed would be drunk, vomiting, and crying over her ex-boyfriend. Not to mention, she went to school with my little sister.
Beth Fred
#26. There are people who have an image of me as being rude and inconsiderate. But I'm completely the opposite, because I was raised not to be. I might have been tripping over myself drunk, but I was always courteous.
Slash
#27. Oh Abby ... I want you to know ... I am so full of shit. You should not listen to me. I know nothing.
Gemma Burgess
#28. Roy had communicated, days earlier, to the Zen master that I was a drunk - unreliable - either faint-hearted or vicious - therefore during the cerimony, don't ask Bukowski for the rings because Bukowski might not be there. or he might loose the rings, or vomit, or loose Bukowski
Charles Bukowski
#29. Reevie ... I feel wasted." Her head sways from side to side, her hair hanging in her face. "Will you please take me home?"
I peer at her. She's had, like, two beers. I've seen her finish a six-pack in under an hour and not get tipsy.
Jenny Han
#30. It was very nerve-wracking for me. I had to be drunk and have a threesome. I'm not that guy. Bobby Cannavale is that guy. But it was Vegas and things got crazy, and it happened. We go to Vegas to try to sign Elvis Presley and things get crazy. My character [in Vinyl] is stoned.
Ray Romano
#31. Susanna, what you need is a man to look after you
a proper one, not a drunk or a philanderer
or sure as fate, you'll not be safe on this earth."
"Oh, nonsense, Nan. I had a man, and he didn't look after me at all, and now I'm just beginning to enjoy myself.
Judith Merkle Riley
#32. I have nothing I want to ask you, and if I did, you would probably lie anyway."
"I'm drunk. Drunk people tell the truth."
"Like hell they do. Besides you're not that drunk."
"Then dare me something."
I snorted. "No, because I'm not that drunk, or stupid.
Elizabeth Morgan
#33. I've drunk Amazon's free Diet Coke. Nothing makes more sense to me than a company trying to make bookselling into a profitable business. I'm not anti-Amazon, and I'm not pro-publishers either. I'm pro-books.
Lev Grossman
#34. I'm not for drunk driving - however, the states ought to decide. Different states have different penalties for drunk driving because they're states and they get to do that. If people of one state want to be lighter on drunk drivers, they're wrong. That's their business.
Tucker Carlson
#35. I'm not really the party person. I don't 'become myself' once I'm drunk. I don't use alcohol to be happy.
Jessie J.
#36. I won't forgive I won't forget. Let hell open and rain my wrath down on them all. I will not be stopped and I have no mercy left inside me. I am death and I revel in the killings of my enemies. Bring me them all until I'm drunk on their blood.
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#37. Bad girl, drunk by six, kissing someone else's lips. Smoked to many cigarettes today, I'm not happy when I act this way.
Madonna Ciccone
#38. Fuck, Katie. I'm not sleeping with you naked unless we're gonna fuck, and we're not gonna fuck while you're this drunk. Especially the first time.
Jaine Diamond
#39. I'm not a drunk anymore, but since they cut out my tongue, I sound drunk.
Eddie Van Halen
#40. The generalizing writer is like the passionate drunk, stumbling into your house mumbling: I know I'm not being clear, exactly, but don't you kind of feel what I'm feeling?
George Saunders
#41. Don't think I'm talking nonsense because I'm drunk. I'm not a bit drunk. Brandy's all very well, but I need two bottles to make me drunk.
Fyodor Dostoyevsky
#42. I may be drunk but at least I'm not insane.
Tom Waits
#43. I'm not sure it is possible to describe just how hard it is to acquire a reputation as a drunk in Russia.
David Remnick
#44. I've been known to turn up drunk at triathlons and do very well. I'm more of a heat-of-the-moment type of guy. A friend will tell me about something coming up, maybe that weekend, and usually not an abundance of thought goes into my doing it.
Ryan Kwanten
#45. You think I'm drunk and talking nonsense? I'm not. I would know she was being well taken care of, and I could go pleasantly to seed here in the mountains. It would be a fine, quiet feeling.
Yasunari Kawabata
#46. If I'm not the one thing you can't stand to lose,
If I'm not that arrow to the heart of you,
If you don't get drunk on my kiss,
If you think you can do better than this then I guess we're done.
Let's not drag this on,
Consider me gone ...
Reba McEntire
#47. Madoc, it's Jax," he said in a serious tone. "I'm at your house. Tate and I want confirmation you're not drunk, high, or suicidal. Jared's here, but he could care less. We'll meet you after your game, or I'll give Tate a crowbar and set her to work on your car.
Penelope Douglas
#48. I can do this, he was thinking. All I have to do is just be as normal as everyone else. All I have to do is just not blow apart like a two-dollar clock. Just pick words and put one of them after the other like a baby learning to walk, like a drunk carefully crossing the street.
William Gay
#49. Please, let me take you home. You're drunk."
"I am not." I shoved him, spilling some kind of delicious poison on him. "Go home and have a wild time with Ms. Scarlet. In the bedroom. With the - "
"Okay, you're starting to talk board game. Let's go home, babe. I'll get you into bed.
Rachael Wade
#50. It's for Carson. (Margery)
And I repeat what I said. Just what I need, a bunch of drunk fucks working on me. Remind me not to do anything stupid tonight. Oh wait, I'm here. Too late for that warning, huh? (Fury)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#51. Hearth's eyes rimmed with green water. He signed to us, and this time I think he actually meant I love you and not the giantesses are drunk.
Rick Riordan
#52. I'm not going to get drunk at a bar. There are younger girls who look up to me. So I do my best not to stray too far.
Ashley Greene
#53. After a while of watching me, he stands and punches me in the face. "If you punch me back, you will be sent home, Pixie." I kick him in the shin. He limps away, laughing like a drunk Uncle Narol. I'm not sent home.
Pierce Brown
#54. True, I am drunk, and small, and damp, but mistake not my moistness for weakness, although there's an argument to be made for that, as well.
Christopher Moore
#55. Relatively few who could be described as a Red-haired dejenerate Pox-ridden Usuring Son of a Bitch who skulks in Brothels when not drunk and comitting Riot in the Street, I imagine.
Diana Gabaldon
#56. Oh you, unceasing sun, to me Your particles communicate The luminous essence of God, Are you our God? I do not know. Intoxicated, I say nought, Bewitched by the magic potion. I cannot differentiate Between my drunk and sober state.
Rumi
#57. After we had drunk the sherry I bought cider for us, and we were a little tipsy as we swayed on the high stools and looked out at the rain as it fell on the fields that shot past the train. But being tipsy we did not see very much and the rain did not touch us.
Edna O'Brien
#58. I wrote my songs despite the fact that I was a drunk, not because of it
Warren Zevon
#59. She's still smiling her little smile, and it strikes me that, actually, she is drunk, not on alcohol, but on her St. Louis hopes and dreams. I wouldn't sober her up for anything, but she doesn't need me anymore. She can hang on to her dreams by herself now.
Tim Tharp
#60. I'm sorry, what did you say? I'm not fluent in stupid drunk slut
Christine Zolendz
#61. I'm never drunk on the road, and since I've got to take care of my voice, smoke is definitely not allowed.
Chaz Bundick
#62. Don't judge. I'm not getting drunk. I'm coping.
A.S. King
#63. I'm walking through the city
Like a drunk, but not
With my slip showing a little
Like a drunk, but not
And I am one of your people
But the cars don't stop
And I am one of your people
But the cars don't stop
Regina Spektor
#64. You can party, but I better not catch you drunk. (Wulf) (Chris rolled his eyes, then bent down to said to Cassandra's stomach ... ) Be wise, little guy, stay in there where Lord King Neurotic can't kill all your fun. (Chris)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#65. It's a tradition to drink rakia with snacks. Not like the Russians, you know, who just drink to get drunk. I like a little snack with the news.
Annie Ward
#66. Drunk nerds. Not my thing."
"You like nerds."
"Not nerds who join fraternities," Cath said. "That's a whole subclass of nerds that I'm not interested in.
Rainbow Rowell
#67. Oh my God. I'm not Keith Richards. I'm Otis from Mayberry! A fucking drunk!
Dave Mustaine
#68. Not to mention, we're using you for bait. (Syn)
Are you that drunk? (Nykyrian)
What? I wasn't supposed to tell her that? (Syn)
I'm bait? (Kiara)
No, you're not bait. Ignore the alcoholic whose view of reality is distorted by his brain-damaged hallucinations. (Nykyrian)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#69. I try not to drink too much because when I'm drunk, I bite.
Bette Midler
#70. I am not so foolish as to murmur, if now, since I have drunk up my wine and beer, I have to put up with skimmed milk and sour.
Sigrid Undset
#71. It was your brother. He must be insane."
"Not insane, dear." Sybilla, speaking gently, contradicted. "Not insane. But magnificently drunk, I fear.
Dorothy Dunnett
#72. Only weeks after Oslo began, when nearly all the world and most of Israel was drunk with the idea of peace, I argued that a Palestinian society not constrained by democratic norms would be a fear society that would pose a grave threat to Israel.
Natan Sharansky
#74. May this night come
wearing drunk cloak of love,
carrying passionate desires,
and intoxication of love!
Tonight, may I get so drunk in love that
I do not see any dreams!
Suman Pokhrel
#75. I didn't quit drinking because I was a bad drunk. I quit because I was a spectacular drunk. It got to be like a video game, where you get to the highest level and it's not even a challenge any more.
David Feherty
#76. I don't have a favorite author; I have favorite books. 'Moby Dick' is a favorite book, but Melville was a drunk who beat his wife. 'Moveable Feast' by Hemingway, but I would not like him personally. He was a stupid macho person who believed in shooting animals for fun, but that book was incredible!
Gary Paulsen
#77. I try not to laugh at the fact that even when she's drunk, she has a hard time saying it. "Where do you want me to take you?" She drops her head back against my chest. "You can just keep carrying me. It's very relaxing.
Jessica Sorensen
#78. People are used to being stimulated. People are drunk on entertainment and when you're going out and seeing movies where 200 people are machine gunned down and vampires are tearing people's throats out, and I'm not saying that is bad or it should be censored, but people are drunk on stimuli.
Alex Jones
#79. Friends don't let friends drive drunk."
"Are you trying to appeal to my conscience?"
"How can you turn down a once-in-a-lifetime chance to drive the 'Stang?"
"How about you sell me the 'Stang for thirty dollars? I can even pay cash."
"Drunk, but not that drunk, Grey.
Becca Fitzpatrick
#80. Putting my face in food is not a habit I have unless I'm really drunk.
Charlotte Dawson
#81. I stood slowly and deposited Rimmel beside Ivy. "Watch her," I said.
Rimmel huffed and muttered something about not being a dog.
Then she barked.
Ivy laughed.
It probably wasn't my best idea to have one drunk girl look after another, but I had a jaw to punch.
Cambria Hebert
#82. I am still drunk that you were here,
and you were mine.
And once again I stretch my hand out
for that wine;
As your drunk eyes could not bestir
themselves, I too
Can't move; as you love wine, I love
the wine that's you;
Jahan Malek Khatun
#83. You do not really wish to hear more of the Battle of Kadesh. Let me say only that human fat, gorged in considerable quantity, has an intoxicating effect. I became ... drunk.
Norman Mailer
#84. My heart had made its decision and there was no going back. Still, it was hard not to be all bitter and betrayed over his announcement. I didn't even have the luxury of being able to get blind rotten drunk. And believe me, dealing with all this sober sucked.
Kylie Scott
#85. Miles, it's only morning and you're already drunk."
"No, I'm not," I weakly protested. "I'm just thirsty.
Rex Pickett
#86. The torches ran off, and I found myself in a forest, at night, without any light, on skis, and that was not fun - particularly because I was drunk. Luckily at some point I started to see the light of the ski lift. To be in the forest in the middle of the night, it's terrible.
Roman Polanski
#87. Well, if I am not drunk, I am mad," replied Syme with perfect calm; "but I trust I can behave like a gentleman in either condition.
G.K. Chesterton
#88. I've been in clubs. I don't like being in an enclosed place with really loud music, and a lot of drunk people. It's not my idea of a good time. It's just such a miserable life.
Joaquin Phoenix
#89. Ya got cigarettes?" she asks. "Yes," I say,
"I got cigarettes." "Matches?" she asks.
"Enough to burn Rome." "Whiskey?"
"Enough whiskey for a Mississippi River
of pain." "You drunk?" "Not yet.
Charles Bukowski
#90. I'm not a fan of reality shows, but I am a fan of people who use their brains and skills and hard work to outsmart people, not to steal someone's man or get drunk on TV.
Sandra Bullock
#91. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were trying to get me drunk," I said to Ranger.
"Not drunk," Ranger said. "Just relaxed and naked.
Janet Evanovich
#92. I don't drink to get drunk. That's just not cute.
Taylor Swift
#93. You have to take pains in a memoir not to hang on the reader's arm, like a drunk, and say, 'And then I did this and it was so interesting.
Annie Dillard
#94. It's not funny. I've got a naked drunk vampire running around in my orchard.
Ilona Andrews
#95. It's said that I went into a rant, but I think it went on for about five words. I was drunk. It just turned into a big thing. I apologized profusely-not once but three times. So what's the problem? It's four years ago. Do I need to apologize again?
Mel Gibson
#96. I'm just funnier when I'm drunk. Not falling-down drunk, just drunk enough to lose the self-doubt.
Doug Stanhope
#97. I have no rules on drinking. In your young days, you can play strong even if you are not healthy. If they want to get drunk and smoke, they can, but not immediately after a match when the body is weak and vulnerable.
Felix Magath
#98. Scott: Friends don't let friends drive drunk. Nora: Are you trying to appeal to my conscience? Scott: How can you turn down a once-in-a-lifetime chance to drive the 'Stang? Nora: How about you sell me the 'Stang for thirty dollars? I can even pay cash. Scott: Drunk, but not that drunk, Grey.
Becca Fitzpatrick
#99. I am not a broken heart.
I am not collarbones or drunken letters never sent. I am not the way I leave or left or didn't know how to handle anything,
at any time,
and I am not your fault.
Charlotte Eriksson
#100. I'm not a big drinker and I don't smoke either. I've only been drunk a few times, but I did moon my friend once. I had knickers on! I'll leave the real mooning to the boys.
Nikki Sanderson
Famous Authors
Popular Topics
Scroll to Top
