Top 52 Quotes About Herpes
#1. It must be some book," she said as she knelt down next to the bed ... "Did that boy give it to you?" She asked out of nowhere.
"By 'it' do you mean herpes?"
"You are too much," Mom said, "The book, Hazel. I mean the book.
John Green
#2. The virus of irony is as widespread in California as herpes, and once you're infected with it, it lives in your brain forever.
Neal Stephenson
#3. I think the philosophy in our public schools, and many other institutions today, is that a dose of God is more hazardous to your health than a dose of herpes or drugs.
Cal Thomas
#5. Were I forced to describe this woman in one word, that word would be ... herpes.
Jen Lancaster
#6. It's all over you when you say his name. Like glitter or something. You can't ever get that shit off. Glitter is the herpes of the craft world.
Leta Blake
#7. It turns out, teachers think of glitter as the herpes of craft world- impossible to contain or exterminate. (Beer Buckets and Baby Jesus)
Myra McEntire
#8. It was a newsflash to me that dating as a pre-thirty divorcette was as bad as having herpes.
Stephanie Klein
#9. You can't assume the best about people. If I get a girl home and she takes her pants off, and it looks like she's got herpes, I can't afford to assume she got stung by a pack of bees.
Dov Davidoff
#11. One time I was forced to go to the doctors because of a sports accident. Herpes.
Mitch Hedberg
#12. According to Marcie's mom, only people with no class actually use the word class. If you have it, then you never talk about it."
"Oh". Johnny nodded slowly. "Just like herpes.
Kristin Walker
#13. Mom hooked me up to a portable tank and then reminded me I had class. "Did that boy give it to you?" she asked out of nowhere.
"By it, do you mean herpes?"
"You are too much," Mom said. "The book, Hazel. I mean the book."
"Yeah, he gave me the book.
John Green
#14. Paris Hilton has launched a new champagne in a can called Rich Prosecco. For the ad campaign Paris posed wearing nothing but gold paint. That's a unique way to cover up herpes.
Chelsea Handler
#15. Herpes, AIDS, the Middle East at full throttle. Better check that sausage before you put it in the waffle.
Lou Reed
#16. Can you ever "solve" disease, unemployment, war, or any other societal herpes? Hell no. All you can hope for is to make them manageable enough to allow people to get on with their lives. That's not cynicism, that's maturity.
Max Brooks
#17. Do you have a boyfriend?" he asked.
"Huh?" Why would he ask her that?
"A big, mean-as-fuck, jealous guy who will break my neck with his bare hands if he knew I touched you?"
Toni shook her head.
"A raging case of herpes?"
"Of course not!"
"You're not making this any easier on me.
Olivia Cunning
#18. All I could think about was throwing something at her - something made of glass. Or spikes. Or a viral disease. They really should invent Herpes In A Jar for moments like these
Robin Mellom
#20. Wendy warmed my heart, earned my trust, touched my soul, and then touched me in a lot of other places. And right after we'd slept together for the very first time she looked up at me with her chocolate-brown, trustworthy doe eyes and said, I've got herpes. I thought you should know.
Caprice Crane
#22. I don't believe war ever does. It's a madness that's in our nature. Sometimes it recurs; sometimes it subsides." "Sounds like a disease." "The herpes simplex of the species?
James S.A. Corey
#23. Herpes B is a very rare infection in humans but a nasty one, with a case fatality rate of almost 70 percent among those few dozen people infected during the twentieth century (before recent breakthroughs in antiviral pharmaceutics) and almost 50 percent even since then. When
David Quammen
#24. Well, listen, sweetheart. Boys only want one thing, of course, and guess what that means for you? Heartbreak. Pregnancy. Chlamydia, herpes, syphilis, crabs.
That's beautiful, Dad. You should set it to music.
Kristan Higgins
#25. I find love is more of a bacterium than a virus unless you are comparing it to herpes.
Amanda Mosher
#26. Yes, he's like a rash for which there's no cure. It only goes away for a bit before returning unexpectedly to ruin every pleasurable experience. He should have been named Herpes rather than ZT. Or maybe just Herpes Z, since he's a very special irritant. (Arik)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#27. ... it seemed appropriate that I should develop some kind of illness. This is a good idea when you are at a loose end because everything, up to and including herpes, is better than being bored.
Jeremy Clarkson
#28. Your like herpes you show up when shit gets tense, and never fully go away! - (Cooper to Violet)
Ann Charles
#29. Why does everybody say 'feminist' that way?" "What way?" "The way Dooney kept saying 'herpes' after health class last year. Like it's this terrible, unspeakable thing.
Aaron Hartzler
#30. Pot is to narcotics what herpes is to social diseases; it doesn't count cos it's not really dangerous and it's too easy to get.
Doug Stanhope
#31. Whenever I'm about to have sex with a girl, I play it smart and just automatically assume she has herpes; because that way I don't have to tell her about my herpes.
Anthony Jeselnik
#32. I was thinking about picking up kayaking, but I didn't want anyone to think I had herpes.
Ingrid Weir
#33. Alcoholism is a disease," she said. "Like athlete's foot. Or herpes. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Luker and I have lots of friends who are alcoholics. And speed freaks too." "Well,
Michael McDowell
#34. Los Angeles is like San Diego's older, uglier sister that has herpes.
Justin Halpern
#35. Britain's Advisory Committee on Dangerous Pathogens had lately reclassified herpes B into biohazard level 4, placing it in the elite company of Ebola, Marburg, and the virus that causes Crimean-Congo hemorrhagic fever. National
David Quammen
#36. A simple hello could lead to a million things. "Yeah," Gus said. "Like herpes or getting fisted.
T.J. Klune
#37. Can you ever "solve" poverty? Can you ever "solve" crime? Can you ever "solve" disease, unemployment, war, or any other societal herpes? Hell no.
Max Brooks
#38. Insecurity is like herpes. It's not going anywhere. May as well learn to laugh at it.
Dov Davidoff
#39. She's out of my league, but if she has herpes ...
That puts us in the same league!
The herpes league!
Rick Remender
#40. I am a player in life, not an observer. I look at herpes the way you look at a scraped knee.
Doug Stanhope
#41. My daddy, or papa as Ilike to call him is always healthy. Sure, he had the herpes but he managed it very well!
Santino Marella
#42. Sex can lead to nasty things like herpes, gonorrhea, and something called relationships.
Sacha Baron Cohen
#43. If you love something set it free, but don't be surprised if it comes back with herpes.
Chuck Palahniuk
#44. It's rock and roll, sugar. Guys shouldn't sound like angels. They should sound like sick bastards who'll butt fuck your little sister and leave her with herpes.
Bijou Hunter
#45. She covered her body with a feather, reached under her legs, and threw her panties into the audience. A flying herpes rag. A hipster with mutton-chop sideburns caught it. He crumpled it in his fist and thrust it into the air excitedly. His little venereal prize. A
Neil Strauss
#46. Why is it beautiful that humanity keeps coming back? So does herpes.
Isaac Marion
#47. The Dark Ages are alive and secretly thriving like a herpes infection among us.
Juliette Fay
#49. I'm kinda like herpes, I just keep coming back.
George Carlin
#50. Gave a girl herpes in exchange for syphilis, put my LP on your Christmas gift list.
Eminem
#51. You," Madeline said, her voice hollow and wheezing, "are like a bad case of herpes, wizard. You're inconvenient, embarassing, no real threat, and you simply will not go away.
Jim Butcher
#52. Harpies, n. A disease transmitted to humans by birds with human faces.
Ron Brackin
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