Top 100 A Unicorn Quotes
#1. Advice to Young Poets
Never pretend
to be a unicorn
by sticking a plunger on your head.
Martin Espada
#2. What a magical place," she whispered in an awed voice. "I expect a unicorn or fairies to appear."
"What would the fairies be doing?" Shermont asked. "Waltzing with the butterflies," she answered before thinking.
Laurie Brown
#4. Of all the various unpleasant ways to be aroused from a sound sleep, one of the worst is the noise of a dragon and a unicorn playing tag. Myth Conceptions by Robert Asprin
Robert Asprin
#5. No place is more enchanted than where a unicorn has been born.
Peter S. Beagle
#6. I had a naked incubus in my bedroom. With a frying pan of half-cooked bacon, and a hard-on. And a unicorn bite on his ass. Christ, this was turning out to be a weird morning.
Allison Pang
#7. I'm like a unicorn; I'm a midlist writer who hasn't done anything else but write. But because I wasn't amazingly famous, I didn't become Stephanie Meyer, or even a huge literary name like a Jonathan Franzen or a Joshua Ferris.
Gabrielle Zevin
#8. So quit looking for 'the one'. You have a better chance of finding an Oompa Loompa riding a unicorn, fighting Bigfoot.
Matt Chandler
#10. it is a monstrous thing, to slay a unicorn
J.K. Rowling
#12. I'm saying let's go see if we can find some horses or zebras before we start a unicorn hunt.
James S.A. Corey
#13. They Call her the Devourer."
"I'm guessing she's not a unicorn princess.
Zoraida Cordova
#14. If you can make a mechanical horse, why wouldn't you make it a unicorn?
A.W. Exley
#15. So you can sense her aura and stuff, right?" Kail asked as he got to his feet. "So anything I say about her not being a unicorn--
Patrick Weekes
#17. The thing was, Colton was confident and self-assured, maybe even a little cocky, but he wasn't arrogant. He was like a unicorn.
Jennifer L. Armentrout
#18. I know, and I do trust you, but when you said it was a surprise I thought you meant 'Here, Luce. I got you a unicorn.' not 'Here, Luce, jump in the river.
Jay McLean
#19. Would you believe it's harder to find a virgin than a unicorn in New York?
Naomi Novik
#20. It's mind-blowing and delicious and better
than finding a pot of gold, a unicorn, and a leprechaun who shits diamonds at
the end of a rainbow.
Tara Sivec
#21. from the poem Holographic Personality Disgrace:
Some people are such assholes that saying, "Look, again, I'm sorry I cut off my thumb and glued it to your baby's head because I thought you'd like him better as a unicorn" means nothing to them.
Sam Pink
#23. It is no shame to lose to me, mortal. Even among mythical creatures there are very few who can give a unicorn a good game.
Roger Zelazny
#24. When I was five, my mother and sister sat me up on the kitchen counter and explained the facts of life: the Easter Bunny didn't exist, Elijah was God's invisible friend, with any luck Nana would die soon and If I ever saw a unicorn, I should kill it or catch it for cash.
Sloane Crosley
#25. I'm a serious geek. I mean I seriously want to own a unicorn when I'm older ... or a Pegasus ... yeah Pegasus sounds better.
Henry Cavill
#26. She just shook her head and pulled out a small bottle of some random pop star's signature perfume, spritzing me with the sickly-sweet smell.
"Oh, come on Ash, that smells like a unicorn fart," I cried, recoiling at the overpowering, candylike smell.
Cara Lynn Shultz
#27. There is never any certainty of the unseen. We hope. That's what we do as Christians, and that's what I do with unicorns. Maybe like C. S. Lewis's jewel, that glimpse of a unicorn I sometimes see is a glimpse of Jesus.
Colleen Coble
#28. All four of them looked at Diane as if she had said Kendel had just returned from her trip and had brought them a unicorn skeleton.
Beverly Connor
#29. He is a unicorn. I want to gently capture him and bring him back to my lab for research.
Amanda Mosher
#30. Get the hell out of here. You're an accountant? You?" He must be joking . Beautiful and highly intelligent? I feel like I've found a unicorn.
Daniels, J. (2014-05-02). Sweet Addiction (Kindle Locations 280-281). . Kindle Edition.
J. Daniels
#31. So this is what it's about? This is your mature response to go off into the mountains rather than talking about it and have s'mores with a gnome and a mountain man."
"Yep"
"What's your plan for tomorrow? Brunch with a unicorn?
Ilona Andrews
#33. That was like seeing a dodo and a unicorn all wrapped up in one
Rachel Maddow
#34. Everyone says social media is a unicorn, but maybe it's just a horse?
Jay Baer
#35. [He] was always here to offer cups of good clear Walden Pond, or shout down the deep well of Shakespeare and listen, with satisfaction, for echoes. Here the lion and the hartebeest lay together, here the jackass became a unicorn.
Ray Bradbury
#36. Not a unicorn's chance in Hell," Owen grunted.
"Now, what would a unicorn be doing in Hell?" Liam asked.
"You can ask him when you get there.
Abigail Roux
#37. If I'm talking to a guy who's straight and cute and single, I'm like 'are you a unicorn?'
Margaret Cho
#38. The only thing that would make her jealous would be if I led a parade riding a unicorn while ballerinas sang love songs.
Brandon Mull
#39. Yancey crawled from her tangled bed one morning and assembled her long limbs and sharp bones into something as exotic and seductive to the eye as a peacock or a griffin or a unicorn.
Anne Rivers Siddons
#42. Just roll me in fairy dust and call me a unicorn.
Lita Burke
#43. Balance. It's like a unicorn; we've heard about it, everyone talks about it and makes airbrushed T-shirts celebrating it, it seems super rad, but we haven't actually seen one. I'm beginning to think it isn't a thing.
Jen Hatmaker
#44. I had this dream about you. We went hunting up in the mountains and I caught a unicorn. You told me now I know how it feels to be you.
Crystal Woods
#45. the last time I saw commercial laying hens administered hormones, they were given by a unicorn, and brought onto the farm by one of the giant alligators from the sewers.
Marc Draco
#47. Let us only hate hatred; and once give love a play, we will fall in love with a unicorn.
Herman Melville
#48. Oh please," Scout said."Don't take that tone with me. You know you'd love to have a minion. Someone at your beck and call. Someone to do your bidding. How many times have you said to yourself," Self, I need a unicorn to run errands and such?
Chloe Neill
#49. It's like learning to ride a unicorn. You never forget.
Eoin Colfer
#50. Those were not vampires.
If sunlight makes you sparkle,
you're a unicorn.
Ryan Mecum
#51. I really am a unicorn?' I asked again.
'You think Janis and I escaped from an asylum, don't you?' she teased.
'I hope you're not,' I said, horrified at the thought of being turned into a lunatic like them.
Deepika Kumaaraguru
#52. But this girl, she lived in a bubble, and seeing her out at a frat party was like spotting a unicorn.
Ilsa Madden-Mills
#53. Everything today has been heavy and brown. Bring me a Unicorn to ride about the town.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
#54. Float like a butterfly, sting like a unicorn ;)
T.J. Klune
#55. A unicorn is a donkey from the future
Joe Rogan
#56. A unicorn is nothing more than a big horse that comes to a point, anyway. Nothing to get so excited about.
Terry Pratchett
#57. Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then, always be a unicorn.
Jaime Murray
#58. Grow up, Be a Unicorn, Stab people with your head.
Anonymous
#59. She quickly interpreted him into her mythology but if, at first, he was a herbivorous lion, later he became a unicorn devouring raw meat.
Angela Carter
#60. Have you seen a unicorn in the woods?"
"I imagine that's next," Jared muttered.
"Right," said Holly. "Well. If the unicorn is pink, about two feet tall, with a sparkly mane, we'll know my imaginary friend is real too.
Sarah Rees Brennan
#61. ...every time a unicorn laughs, an angel has tender sexual intercourse on her wedding night. And nine months later, a rainbow is born!
Frank Lesser
#62. I could eat a unicorn and pick my teeth with his horn! I'm absolutely famished.
Amy Harmon
#63. He knew what she wanted, and he wanted it, too; he was ready, but not, despite her gorgeousness, with Tiglah. Tiglah was not worth losing his ability to touch a unicorn.
Madeleine L'Engle
#64. Them papers are clean as a unicorn's snatch!
Ginn Hale
#65. The only better thing than a unicorn, is a gay unicorn.
Lady Gaga
#66. Be yourself. Unless you can be a unicorn, In that case, you should always be a unicorn.
Elle Lothlorien
#67. Earthquakes were extremely uncommon in this area. A dragon and a unicorn playing tag wasn't.
Robert Asprin
#68. You can paint it white and braid its mane, but at the end of the day, you can't turn an ass into a unicorn, no matter how much glitter and flowers you sprinkle on it.
Nicole Williams
#69. My conscience has the same hard reality as a unicorn.
Jeff Lindsay
#71. The prostate might as well have been a mythological creature like a unicorn or Leprechaun only acknowledged through whispery giggles among women brunching with their gay friends.
Maggie Young
#73. Every time you tell a lie an angel punches a unicorn in the face with a kitten.
Dave Turner
#74. Amazement could go no further. If Phryne had ridden in on a unicorn he would merely have remarked on its elegant hocks and golden horn and suggested that she enter it weight for age at Felmington. Well, no, not a unicorn. Not Phryne. A dragon, perhaps. He was sure that she could tame a dragon.
Kerry Greenwood
#75. Whatever can die is beautiful - more beautiful than a unicorn, who lives forever, and who is the most beautiful creature in the world. Do you understand me?
Peter S. Beagle
#76. One of the worst ways of being aroused from sound sleep, is by the noise of a dragon and a unicorn playing tag.
Robert Asprin
#77. Virgins are a rare breed anywhere, but at your age, you're practically a unicorn.
Heidi Cullinan
#78. A unicorn is just a horse with a point of view
Ron Sexsmith
#79. Gary snorted. When he did, little pink and purple sparkles shot out his nose. Being a unicorn is awesome like that.
T.J. Klune
#80. You can buy me a drink if you want," the kid says, suddenly appearing at Pip's shoulder. He turns round a bit to look at him, trying not to smile.
"That's generous of you."
"Ain't it?"
"What makes you think I'd wanna buy another man a drink?"
"Cos your t-shirt's got a unicorn on it.
Richard Rider
#81. I'm eighteen; I'm a princess; and I'm a virgin. You know what? At this point in my life, I might as well be a unicorn. Happy freaking birthday to me.
Meg Cabot
#82. Let's put it like this; men like Berkley, like me, we don't get a no for an answer, a girl who says no is like a ... like a unicorn, and we all want to **** the unicorn!
Carolina Soto
#83. I was testing a hypothesis. But it was right, and then I had a unicorn to deal with. You can't just say, 'Thank you so much, go away now' to a unicorn, the way you can with atomic particles.
Pamela Dean
#84. Don't you love it that Prince doesn't use Twitter? Don't you think he's somewhere on a unicorn?
Bruno Mars
#85. A unicorn in this magical star.
In my new home.
My ethereal home.
Saturna
Deepika Kumaaraguru
#86. Don't worry chief,"said foaly,"It's like riding a unicorn,you never forget.
Eoin Colfer
#87. I am fit to capture a unicorn, and I should not be so questioned ...
Philippa Gregory
#88. I swallow and stare and swallow again, because dear, sweet Jesus riding a unicorn, he's perfect.
Cora Carmack
#89. Poetry is news brought to the mountains by a unicorn and an echo.
Czeslaw Milosz
#90. There is something about riding a unicorn, for those people who still can, which is unlike any other experience: exhilarating, and intoxicating, and fine.
Neil Gaiman
#92. Kaiser and Lenz are staring at each other like hunters who have walked into a thicket after a lion and found a unicorn.
Greg Iles
#93. A truly wise man does not play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Gautama Buddha
#94. Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Benny Hill
#96. When a unicorn is slain, men have destroyed again the image of beauty that they seek.
Nicholas Stuart Gray
#97. If a unicorn trotted out of the woods and stabbed a leprechaun through its tiny heart with its shimmering golden horn, she probably wouldn't even blink.
Cassidy Cayman
#98. The minute that you bring a unicorn into a story, you know that it's a fairy tale or a fable, because unicorns don't exist as animals. They exist as fantasy creatures.
Gloria Vanderbilt
#99. Okay," I said slowly, "but what the hell would you mate a horse with to get a unicorn, because I don't see horses and narwhales doing the dirty boogie.
Jonathan Maberry
#100. What is a unicorn without his horn?" (Antonella)
"A white horse?" (Adam)
Antonella smiled. "A very unhappy white horse.
Mark Mills
Famous Authors
Popular Topics
Scroll to Top
