Top 100 Unicorn Quotes
#1. So wary as to disappear for centuries and reappear but never caught, the unicorn has been preserved by an unmatched device wrought like the work of expert blacksmiths ...
Marianne Moore
#2. Are you sure this is a good idea?' whispered the unicorn.
'No,' said Rupert. 'But it's our best chance to find a dragon.'
'Frankly, that doesn't strike me as such a hot idea either,' muttered the unicorn.
Simon R. Green
#3. The lost unicorn is in our presence!!
Olivia
#4. Is there n-nothing you can do?" Parmida asked, wiping her tears away with the heel of her hand.
The unicorn laughed softly. "She asks for a boon after shooting me in the ass.
Ash Gray
#5. Another chunk of my childhood dreams had just run down the reality drain in the form of a horny unicorn, no less.
Allison Pang
#6. I really am a unicorn?' I asked again.
'You think Janis and I escaped from an asylum, don't you?' she teased.
'I hope you're not,' I said, horrified at the thought of being turned into a lunatic like them.
Deepika Kumaaraguru
#7. But this girl, she lived in a bubble, and seeing her out at a frat party was like spotting a unicorn.
Ilsa Madden-Mills
#8. Everything today has been heavy and brown. Bring me a Unicorn to ride about the town.
Anne Morrow Lindbergh
#9. I had to harden all of my soft edges if I was going to survive my new life as a tasty Nutella unicorn,
Jaymin Eve
#10. I invented the pelican, but probably not the acorn or unicorn.
Daniel Davis
#11. Float like a butterfly, sting like a unicorn ;)
T.J. Klune
#12. If your unicorn shifts disconcertingly between a goat, a horse, a rhinoceros, a marine mammal from the North Atlantic, assorted Tibetan ungulates and a six-eyed ass whose ears will terrify, the work of this book is almost done.
Chris Lavers
#13. I always thought unicorns were made from sunshine and rainbows and good feelings. Like you just appeared one day in a field filled with flowers and a big fat sunbeam falling all around you. And there'd be butterflies or something. That sounded way pretty. And realistic for unicorn creation.
T.J. Klune
#14. A unicorn is a donkey from the future
Joe Rogan
#15. A unicorn is nothing more than a big horse that comes to a point, anyway. Nothing to get so excited about.
Terry Pratchett
#17. Always be yourself, unless you can be a unicorn. Then, always be a unicorn.
Jaime Murray
#18. Grow up, Be a Unicorn, Stab people with your head.
Anonymous
#19. She wasn't reading Deathly Hallows at all. Her book wasn't orange but rose and water and sand, and featured a kid on a broomstick and white unicorn. Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. She didn't notice me staring at her. 'Oh, I envy you,' I thought, but was smiling for her. She had just begun.
Melissa Anelli
#20. She also possessed a very expertly stuffed unicorn, on whose back she liked to make love. Geralt was of the opinion that if there existed a place less suitable for having sex it was probably only the back of a live unicorn.
Andrzej Sapkowski
#21. She quickly interpreted him into her mythology but if, at first, he was a herbivorous lion, later he became a unicorn devouring raw meat.
Angela Carter
#22. Do you know, I always thought unicorns were fabulous monsters, too? I never saw one alive before!"
Well, now that we have seen each other," said the unicorn, "if you'll believe in me, I'll believe in you.
Lewis Carroll
#23. Is there a God? Who knows? Is there an angry unicorn on the dark side of the moon?
Edward Abbey
#24. Have you seen a unicorn in the woods?"
"I imagine that's next," Jared muttered.
"Right," said Holly. "Well. If the unicorn is pink, about two feet tall, with a sparkly mane, we'll know my imaginary friend is real too.
Sarah Rees Brennan
#25. I was the delicious, chocolate-covered unicorn donut,
Jaymin Eve
#26. ...every time a unicorn laughs, an angel has tender sexual intercourse on her wedding night. And nine months later, a rainbow is born!
Frank Lesser
#27. I could eat a unicorn and pick my teeth with his horn! I'm absolutely famished.
Amy Harmon
#28. He knew what she wanted, and he wanted it, too; he was ready, but not, despite her gorgeousness, with Tiglah. Tiglah was not worth losing his ability to touch a unicorn.
Madeleine L'Engle
#29. Welcome to the estrogen vortex, dude, where mindfucks are the norm and understanding them is as common as a fucking unicorn in your front yard.
K. Bromberg
#30. He was doing quite well until the last sentence, but if you bare your arse to a vengeful unicorn, the number of possible outcomes dwindles to one.
David Mitchell
#31. And he can't stop staring at me, as if I'm some magical dick-sucking unicorn come to life.
Ruby Dixon
#32. I remember reading these articles when I was younger, and I just felt like, well, in order to look like that, you have to have some secret, magical unicorn blood that makes carbs disappear as they go into your body. I prefer the truth.
Olivia Munn
#33. She was taken to St. Mungo's, where," the Headmistress now sounded slightly perturbed, "a standard diagnostic Charm showed Miss Granger as a healthy unicorn in excellent physical condition except that her mane needs combing.
Eliezer Yudkowsky
#34. Them papers are clean as a unicorn's snatch!
Ginn Hale
#35. Am I really standing here, conversing with a bloody unicorn? Tiffy was certain her mind had finally left the building.
T.J. Loveless
#36. The only better thing than a unicorn, is a gay unicorn.
Lady Gaga
#37. Be yourself. Unless you can be a unicorn, In that case, you should always be a unicorn.
Elle Lothlorien
#38. Unicorn. Old French, unicorne. Latin, unicornis. Literally, one-horned: unus, one and cornu,a horn. A fabulous animal resembling a horse with one horn.
Peter S. Beagle
#39. No fiction, no myths, no lies, no tangled webs - this is how Irie imagined her homeland. Because homeland is one of the magical fantasy words like unicorn and soul and infinity that have now passed into language.
Zadie Smith
#40. Earthquakes were extremely uncommon in this area. A dragon and a unicorn playing tag wasn't.
Robert Asprin
#41. We keep hearing from [Barack] Obama and Hillary Clinton and Washington Republicans that they're searching for these mythical moderate rebels. It's like a purple unicorn. They never exist. These moderate rebels end up being jihadists.
Ted Cruz
#42. You can paint it white and braid its mane, but at the end of the day, you can't turn an ass into a unicorn, no matter how much glitter and flowers you sprinkle on it.
Nicole Williams
#43. I have no connections here; only gusty collisions,
rootless seedlings forced into bloom, that collapse.
...
I am the Visiting Poet: a real unicorn,
a wind-up plush dodo, a wax museum of the Movement.
People want to push the buttons and see me glow.
Marge Piercy
#44. I think that if you have a horse, pegasus, qilin, or unicorn, you should sit on it! You should stroke its hair, whisper in its ear, be one with it! And you shouldn't feel sorry if other people don't have one.
C. JoyBell C.
#45. The unicorn halted in her slow, desperate round of the cage, realizing for the first time that the magician understood her speech. He smiled, and she saw that his face was frighteningly young for a grown man-untraveled by time, unvisited by grief or wisdom. "I know you," he said.
Peter S. Beagle
#46. After six years of working on low-budget independent films of the too-weird-to-watch variety, being asked by DreamWorks to come and play with the big boys, it was like finding an unicorn in your sock drawer.
Sienna Guillory
#47. Oh, well, you go to poor school." He gives a comic eye roll. "At rich school, we take notes on hundred-dollar bills using unicorn tears, and our grief is vastly different and more complex.
Delilah S. Dawson
#48. In truth, the unicorn was me - the me I wished I could be - if only I dared.
F.F. White
#49. The black unicorn was mistaken for a shadow or symbol and taken through a cold country where mist painted mockeries of my fury.
Audre Lorde
#50. I would compete in unicorn back riding! Why? Because we are from the same fairytale.
Sasha Pivovarova
#51. My conscience has the same hard reality as a unicorn.
Jeff Lindsay
#53. He curves his fingers, hitting that sweet spot deep inside. The unicorn found the fucking Holy Grail.
Didn't even need a map.
He navigated right there.
J.M. Darhower
#54. The prostate might as well have been a mythological creature like a unicorn or Leprechaun only acknowledged through whispery giggles among women brunching with their gay friends.
Maggie Young
#56. Every time you tell a lie an angel punches a unicorn in the face with a kitten.
Dave Turner
#57. Amazement could go no further. If Phryne had ridden in on a unicorn he would merely have remarked on its elegant hocks and golden horn and suggested that she enter it weight for age at Felmington. Well, no, not a unicorn. Not Phryne. A dragon, perhaps. He was sure that she could tame a dragon.
Kerry Greenwood
#58. There was no moonlight between the trees, but the unicorn glimmered and shone with a pale light, like the moon, while the girl herself glittered and glowed as if she trailed a dust of lights.
Neil Gaiman
#59. All of our lives suck right now, okay? You might think yours is an extra special sparkly rainbow unicorn fart type of suck, but it's not. Just get on with it!
Lia Habel
#60. If the thirsty stag runs to the brook, it's only because he isn't aware of the cruel bow ... If the unicorn runs to its chaste nest, it's only because he doesn't see the noose prepared for him.
Deborah Harkness
#62. Be realistic with your expectations. I'd really like to cuddle a unicorn, but it aint going to happen.
India Knight
#63. Her skin is softer than a lamb's. What does she put on herself? Unicorn tears? Jesus Christ.
Ruby Dixon
#64. Must not a poet hunt the unicorn through bush and bramble, through snow and fire, over desert and mountain, through thickets and over long barren roads even though he suspects sometimes that the unicorn does not exist- or exists only in his imagination?
May Sarton
#65. I've never really undestood," the unicorn mused as the man picked himself up," what you dream of doing with me, once you've caught me."
The man leaped again, and she slipped away from him like rain. "I don't think you know yourself," she said.
Peter S. Beagle
#66. I never was taught how to go into a meeting and talk about a tour and how to plan a show, but seeing that side of things [about] someone who wants to be a Unicorn but has to now be a boss and navigate this is a really powerful and interesting story.
Lilly Singh
#67. Krystal snorted out a laugh. "Hit on me? Freddy, Bubba is gay. Like really gay. Gayer than a unicorn butt-fucking a rainbow. You're the one he has a little crush on.
Drew Hayes
#68. Jessica Pearson isn't a unicorn. She's not a mythological creature. She's an example of so many women out there that are ruling their part of the world and doing an incredible job.
Gina Torres
#69. What is a unicorn without his horn?" (Antonella)
"A white horse?" (Adam)
Antonella smiled. "A very unhappy white horse.
Mark Mills
#70. She didn't know what a goji berry was, but it sounded like something Amazonian tribesmen might eat when they wanted to talk to their ancestors and embark on an inner voyage into some sort of unicorn-infested netherworld.
Whatever worked.
Lola Salt
#71. Not everyone can or will love you. You could run a cotton candy and unicorn farm and someone's gonna think you're an asshole. Everyone's fighting their own battle and it often has nothing to do with you.
Kathryn Budig
#72. Okay," I said slowly, "but what the hell would you mate a horse with to get a unicorn, because I don't see horses and narwhales doing the dirty boogie.
Jonathan Maberry
#73. The minute that you bring a unicorn into a story, you know that it's a fairy tale or a fable, because unicorns don't exist as animals. They exist as fantasy creatures.
Gloria Vanderbilt
#74. My favorite wild animal is a narwhal - the unicorn of the sea. It's a whale with a tooth that sticks out of its head that's almost two-thirds the length of its entire body.
Kesha
#75. If a unicorn trotted out of the woods and stabbed a leprechaun through its tiny heart with its shimmering golden horn, she probably wouldn't even blink.
Cassidy Cayman
#76. When a unicorn is slain, men have destroyed again the image of beauty that they seek.
Nicholas Stuart Gray
#77. 'Unicorn Island' is the synonym for my happy place. It's a really beautiful message: that happiness is one of the hardest things you'll ever fight for, but it's the only thing worth fighting for.
Lilly Singh
#78. No, something far more mysterious has taken Felix. He has heard the unicorn." Like a performer, the cat gave a dramatic pause.
"Um," said Lionheart.
"You have no idea what I'm talking about, have you?"
"No, sorry."
"Mortals," growled the cat.
Anne Elisabeth Stengl
#80. You're a talking unicorn," I said. "Sometimes when you poop, it comes out as rainbows and smells like cookies. There is nothing subtle about you.
T.J. Klune
#81. We were born in the '70s, back when twins were rare, a bit magical: cousins of the unicorn, siblings of the elves.
Gillian Flynn
#82. Deal. Now, could you please untie my sword hand from my head? I feel like a freaking unicorn.
Rick Riordan
#83. Don't be something you're not. Unless you can be a fabulous unicorn. Always be a fabulous unicorn.
PewDiePie
#84. Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Benny Hill
#85. A truly wise man does not play leapfrog with a unicorn.
Gautama Buddha
#86. Kaiser and Lenz are staring at each other like hunters who have walked into a thicket after a lion and found a unicorn.
Greg Iles
#87. And don't even suggest that these would be better off in Tiercel's hands. No, Tiercel has other things to do with his life. You, on the other hand, get to protect him. And guess what that makes you?"
"Stupid?" Harrier suggested. "Suicidal?"
"A Knight-Mage!" the unicorn cried cheerfully.
Mercedes Lackey
#88. Virgins are a rare breed anywhere, but at your age, you're practically a unicorn.
Heidi Cullinan
#89. Let's put it like this; men like Berkley, like me, we don't get a no for an answer, a girl who says no is like a ... like a unicorn, and we all want to **** the unicorn!
Carolina Soto
#90. I'm eighteen; I'm a princess; and I'm a virgin. You know what? At this point in my life, I might as well be a unicorn. Happy freaking birthday to me.
Meg Cabot
#91. You can buy me a drink if you want," the kid says, suddenly appearing at Pip's shoulder. He turns round a bit to look at him, trying not to smile.
"That's generous of you."
"Ain't it?"
"What makes you think I'd wanna buy another man a drink?"
"Cos your t-shirt's got a unicorn on it.
Richard Rider
#92. Gary snorted. When he did, little pink and purple sparkles shot out his nose. Being a unicorn is awesome like that.
T.J. Klune
#93. A unicorn is just a horse with a point of view
Ron Sexsmith
#94. The actual evidence concerning the Exodus resembles the evidence for the unicorn.
Baruch Halpern
#95. One of the worst ways of being aroused from sound sleep, is by the noise of a dragon and a unicorn playing tag.
Robert Asprin
#96. The Lion and the Unicorn were fighting for the crown:
The Lion beat the Unicorn all around the town.
Some gave them white bread, some gave them brown:
Some gave them plum-cake and drummed them out of town.
Lewis Carroll
#97. Whatever can die is beautiful - more beautiful than a unicorn, who lives forever, and who is the most beautiful creature in the world. Do you understand me?
Peter S. Beagle
#98. My guys wanted to call it "Cujo" or "Stiletto." But the developers wanted to call it "Unicorn." Unicorn? Like rainbows and Care Bears? And against all my expectations, "Unicorn" wins the vote. Developers. I'll never understand them.
Gene Kim
#99. I was testing a hypothesis. But it was right, and then I had a unicorn to deal with. You can't just say, 'Thank you so much, go away now' to a unicorn, the way you can with atomic particles.
Pamela Dean
#100. Oh unicorn, Oh magic good, Let me laugh as a child should, Let the gift of childhood, Come back to me, For one day, Just, as it should.
S Rob
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