Top 100 Ilona Andrews Quotes
#1. Dear rabbis, I'm so sorry, I nuked your circle dude. Here is his head as a souvenir. Yeah, that would fly.
Ilona Andrews
#2. Some men got excited by white lace and a translucent negligee. My love muffin got excited by a woman dressed to murder. There was probably something deeply twisted about that. Lucky for me, negligees were never my thing.
Ilona Andrews
#3. If you're really hard up, I can introduce you to my grandmother. She's a fan." Adam blinked. "She doesn't typically sleep with pretty young things, but she would make an exception in your case. You might even learn a trick or two.
Ilona Andrews
#4. Long strands of drool stretched from between his fangs and dripped on the pavement, sending a heady scent of jasmine to swirl through the air. Perfumed monster spit. What was the world coming to?
Ilona Andrews
#5. I can be a good dragon, when the occasion requires it.
Ilona Andrews
#6. They say a hundred-and-thirty-pound woman has no chance against an athletic two-hundred-pound man. That's a lie. You just have to make the decision to hurt him and then do it.
Ilona Andrews
#7. Everybody has something, that one thing they must do to feel happy. I think this is yours, and I want you to be happy. You don't have to do it, but it's here if you choose to come back to it.
Ilona Andrews
#8. It's not a loup cage, you know,' I told her. 'It's a holding cell. Or safe room. or secure room. I don't think Jim ever settled on a term he could live with.'
'Aha. It's a loup cage.' Andrea cleared her throat. 'I touched it with my finger and it hurt. Is that in case of marital problems?
Ilona Andrews
#9. For a second I thought I might actually be alive," I said, looking at Nick's unshaven face. "Now I know - I've gone to Hell and you're my nursemaid.
Ilona Andrews
#10. Life is so precious because it's short. Even the most resilient people are fragile. Life isn't about dying or not dying. It's about living well. Living so you can be proud and happy.
Ilona Andrews
#11. I don't care if he is Curran. In your ward, you are god.
Ilona Andrews
#12. And you expect me to commute two hours each way from the Keep to the Order." I kept my voice mild. "I suppose I won't be needing my job, my house, or my clothes anymore."
"I didn't say that. Although let me get back to you on the clothes. It's still under consideration.
Ilona Andrews
#13. If a man takes you to a restaurant of his choosing, don't compliment him. Rave about the quality of the food and he'll be thrilled, because he took you there.
Ilona Andrews
#14. Fortune favors the brave, I told her. It also kills the stupid, but I decided to keep that fact to myself.
Ilona Andrews
#15. May your life be rich in blessings and poor in misfortunes. May you see your children's children grow up and make you proud. May your fights be short, your laughter loud, and your passion hot. May you live long and die happy.
Ilona Andrews
#16. I did some thinking."
"That is a very dangerous pastime," Ghastek said.
Ilona Andrews
#18. He came for me again. He could barely move, but he dragged himself up and threw himself at an enraged demon for my sake. It was enough to make a girl cry.
Ilona Andrews
#19. You shouldn't give up what you are to make somebody else happy.
Ilona Andrews
#20. Runes, runes, runes ... Runes. An inverted Algiz rune. The caption next to it said "Chernobog." The Black God. Right. Of course, it wouldn't be Chernobog, God of Morning Dew on the Rose Petals, but a woman could always hope.
Ilona Andrews
#21. Ghastek, why haven't you married?" I asked.
He gave me a thin-lipped smile. "Because if I were to get married, I would want to have a family. To me, marriage means children."
"So what's the problem? Shooting blanks?"
Desandra asked.
Kill me.
Ilona Andrews
#22. Vampires smiled for many reasons, but when a vampire male smiled at you from this distance with that kind of look in his eyes it was done for one purpose only: to impress. Look at my big teeth. I'm an apex predator. My genetic material is awesome.
Ilona Andrews
#23. Jealous of the actors now, are we?" "What, of some fancy boy on the screen? Inconceivable." Oh, this was going to be good.
Ilona Andrews
#24. I'm a known fugitive who likes to set people on fire. Come away with me so we can have hot sex while the entire city is trying to shoot me in the head. If I get bored, I'll barbecue you for my amusement. Sure, let me get my shoes.
Ilona Andrews
#25. I don't snore."
He nodded with a wide grin. "It's a quiet peaceful kind of snoring. Like a small cuddly Tasmanian devil. Kind of cute when sleeping, all claws and teeth when awake."
"You snore worse. At least I don't turn into a lion in my sleep.
Ilona Andrews
#26. Yes," Curran said. "We'd like you to officiate."
"I'm sorry?"
"We'd like you to marry us," I said.
Roman's eyes went wide. He pointed to himself. "Me?"
"Yes," Curran said.
"Marry you?"
"Yes."
"You do know what I do, right?"
"Yes," I said. "You're Chernobog's priest.
Ilona Andrews
#27. I wondered if kicking him in the head would make the whole explanation pop out of his mouth in one chunk.
Ilona Andrews
#28. It's not your job to die for your Pack! It's your job to make the other bastards die for theirs.
Ilona Andrews
#29. All that was missing was a neon sign that read EVIL AND CONFLICTED ABOUT IT with a flashing arrow pointing at his head.
Ilona Andrews
#30. I rode out of the stables on top of an eight-foot-tall donkey that looked like she had robbed a Holstein cow and was now wearing the stolen clothes.
Ilona Andrews
#31. Adam glanced up. Brown eyes took my measure. He looked just like he did in all those photographs. Okay. Now I needed to not get fried as I talked his handsome ass into surrendering.
Ilona Andrews
#32. I'm an angel of death. I don't need night school, woman. You should just give up on this detective shit and start killing people for a living. It's simple, honest work, and you ain't got the brains for anything else.
Ilona Andrews
#33. The newcomer struck him as an enterprising sort of man. The kind that would slit your throat for a box of tissues in your bag while you slept.
Ilona Andrews
#34. The Khanum?" Arland coughed. The last sip of tea must've gone wrong.
"Are you unwell?" Dagorkun inquired.
"Healthy as a krahr," Arland said.
"That's such a relief. I would hate for some illness to interfere and spoil the grand celebration I planned when I send you to your afterlife.
Ilona Andrews
#35. Let's play who can be a better killer. My sword and I love this game.
Ilona Andrews
#36. Everyone had a weakness. It was the law of nature that for each being there was a predator, or a disease, or a vulnerability built into their very core.
Ilona Andrews
#37. Maybe I should add some graffiti to spice it up. For a good time call the Consort. Beast Lord eats your food and turns into a lion in his sleep. Mahon has hemorrhoids. Boudas do it better. Warning, paranoid attack jaguar on the prowl ...
Ilona Andrews
#38. I respect your right to differ, but that doesn't change reality. I cannot have people thrown through windows willy-nilly in my county.
Ilona Andrews
#39. He didn't do it because his religion told him to murder people. He didn't do it because he couldn't control himself. He did it out of pure selfish greed, and he didn't feel the least bit upset by it. I'd rather take on a demonic horde any day. The
Ilona Andrews
#40. How do yo feel about her doing this?" That had to be Mahon. That low-pitched growl could only come from him.
"We let each other be who we are," Curran said. "I don't have to like all of the things she has to do. I love her.
Ilona Andrews
#41. Being an innkeeper meant walking a fine line between courtesy and tyranny.
Ilona Andrews
#42. The idiot had shot their own dog. That's what happened when the destructive potential of a man's weapons exceeded his intelligence.
Ilona Andrews
#43. She had only two modes of operation: complete control or complete insanity.
Ilona Andrews
#44. Why? Is the sight of my legs disturbing you, Derek?
Ilona Andrews
#45. Was his body made out of orange rocks and did he at any point yell 'It's clobbering time'?"
"I find your attempt at levity inappropriate."
"Consider me properly chastised.
Ilona Andrews
#46. I chuckled to myself and kept walking. The Universe had proven Curran wrong: a person who aggravated him more than me did, in fact, exist.
Ilona Andrews
#48. Because that's what it would catch in the wild, a boar, right? I can't wait to see a pack of bunnycats take down a wild hog with those short tiny legs. Wouldn't the boar be surprised?"
Everybody was a comedian.
"May be if I oink loud enough, it'll leap across the beam and try to devour me.
Ilona Andrews
#49. The universe was full of wonders. Some of them would drive you insane if you thought about them too long.
Ilona Andrews
#50. Speak to me."
"I hate you."
"Okay." Mad Rogan let go of me. "You're fine.
Ilona Andrews
#51. No. I don't go through your things. I just come once in a while to make sure you're in one piece. I like knowing you're safe, asleep in your bed. I haven't stolen anything ...
Ilona Andrews
#52. Adam's eyes narrowed. I've looked you up. You're small potatoes, Snowflake.
Ilona Andrews
#53. She has a high opinion of herself," Andrea said. "Oh yes. When she gets into a car, her ego has to ride shotgun.
Ilona Andrews
#54. You can stay out here and compare inches for the entire night, but I'm going inside.
Ilona Andrews
#55. You want an excuse for your failure and so you found someone to blame. If you survived, you would always be dirt, ground under someone else's boot.
Ilona Andrews
#56. If the sky could dream, it would dream of dragons.
Ilona Andrews
#57. If she died as a result of this journey, it wouldn't be because of slavers. It would be because Richard's inability to communicate would give her a heart attack.
Ilona Andrews
#58. That would be like stepping in front of a moving train and saying, 'Hey, honey, come stand next to me.'"
I hopped off the wall and stood next to him. "Anytime."
He just looked at me.
"I've never killed a train before. It might be fun to try.
Ilona Andrews
#59. Do you have spies in Clan Heavy?"
"I have spies everywhere."
I looked at Andrea, who was hoarding bacon on her plate.
"She had tea with Mahon's wife." Andrea said.
Aunt B looked at her. "You and I need to work on your air of mystery.
Ilona Andrews
#60. The next time I went anywhere with Mad Rogan, I'd bring one of those bandoliers action stars wore when they routed terrorists from jungles.
Ilona Andrews
#61. I had the metabolism of a hummingbird on crack.
Ilona Andrews
#62. I'm a rat,' Robert said. 'I'm not going into a reptile's mouth.'
Oh boy. Fine time to develop phobias
Ilona Andrews
#63. And then what?"
"I'll burn that bridge when I cross it.
Ilona Andrews
#64. I'm going to find Julie and I'll ground her ass until she forgets what the sun looks like, and then I'll go over to that school and pull their legs out.
Ilona Andrews
#65. He groaned and I saw his face. "Curran!" I would've preferred a homicidal lunatic. Oh, wait ...
Ilona Andrews
#66. My future chef was an oversized, hysterical hedgehog with a martyr complex.
Ilona Andrews
#68. The dusk had arrived on the wings of a night moth, silent and soft. The sky above me darkened to a deep, beautiful purple. Stars glowed high above, and below them, as if inspired by their light, tiny fireflies awoke and crawled from their shelter in the leaves.
Ilona Andrews
#69. When it's over, you will come to me and you will ask me to take charge of you.
Ilona Andrews
#70. No, you're not going with him."
I crossed my arms. "Who decided that?"
He put on his "I'm alpha and I'm putting my foot down" expression. "I decided.
Ilona Andrews
#71. I want to punish them. I want that punishment to be so hard, so vicious that the next who takes their place wets himself at the mere thought of trying to fight me.
Ilona Andrews
#72. Grandma shrugged. "Framed. A man that pretty can't be a murderer." Mother stared at her. "Penelope, I'm seventy-two years old. You let me enjoy my fantasy.
Ilona Andrews
#73. You snore worse. At least I don't turn into a lion in my sleep."
"I only did it once."
"Once was weird enough, thank you.
Ilona Andrews
#74. The concepts of right or wrong are always consequential. It can't be situational or it's not right or wrong.
Ilona Andrews
#75. Is this my replacement?" What? "I didn't replace you!" "Of course not. I'm irreplaceable.
Ilona Andrews
#76. She surveyed the carnage behind him. "Did you have fun?"
He showed her his teeth. "Yes.
Ilona Andrews
#77. Where the hell would I go without you, Kate? No matter where I went, you would be there in my head. I would miss you every moment of my life.
Ilona Andrews
#78. I so didn't need another outbreak of Rogan fever.
Ilona Andrews
#80. Ted said, "You're working for the Order now." "Yes." "How does it feel?" "Well, Doctor, it feels rather sore and tingly.
Ilona Andrews
#81. I slammed that door shut. Fix this mess first. Guilt, regret, and moaning later.
Ilona Andrews
#82. Rose pictured him standing at the boundary of the Ogletree house in that enormous fur cape, with a giant sword sticking over his shoulder, roaring at the top of his lungs and then being upset that nobody came out, and laughed.
Ilona Andrews
#83. Raphael was a bouda and they viewed sex as a fun recreational activity that should be practiced vigorously and often.
Ilona Andrews
#84. Cajun stomp?"
"You heard me, swamper. And keep your hands to yourself.
Ilona Andrews
#85. Is it going to hurt?"
"You bet."
Sergeant Major had a lousy bedside manner.
Ilona Andrews
#86. Some things can come to pass, he reminded himself. Some things are improbable, and some are impossible.
Ilona Andrews
#87. People can snap. People have a limit. And some people are just plain nuts.
Ilona Andrews
#88. I don't know if you heard, but I kind of run this place.
Ilona Andrews
#89. He referred to you as his little snack."
"He's a sweetie.
Ilona Andrews
#90. Every house has a heart, the echoes of its owner's presence, and simple magic that turns a building into a home.
Ilona Andrews
#91. I mourn my sword, but that's alright. Grandmother gave me another one.
Ilona Andrews
#92. Kate& Derek
"No, Kate, you don't understand. He vanished. He was there one moment and then he was gone."
I couldn't resist. "Like a ninja. In a puff of smoke.
Ilona Andrews
#93. If a cultural reference flies over a man's head, does it make a sound if nobody else gets it.
Ilona Andrews
#94. Do you know what most people have from their grandmother? A tea set. Or a quilt." Curran smiled. "If your family had a quilt, it would be made out of chimera skin and stuffed with feathers from dead angels.
Ilona Andrews
#95. Settle down, Princess. It's not my first time.
Ilona Andrews
#96. Curran's whore comes to visit us," Jarek said in accented English.
The three men laughed as if on cue. I glanced at Mahon. "You really shouldn't let him talk to you like that.
Ilona Andrews
#97. Would you like to work here with me?
We have no clients and the pay is shit.
Ilona Andrews
#98. The Beast Lord walked out of the warehouse. The screen went dark.
My knight in furry armor.
Saiman opened his mouth. This is why I didn't. Personally, I think your smile is inappropriate.
Ilona Andrews
#99. Maybe you should make me a list of people I can kill and ways in which they're allowed to die," he said. "You are not funny." "I'm very funny.
Ilona Andrews
#100. ...sometimes what you go looking for isn't as important as what you leave behind.
Ilona Andrews
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