Top 100 Who Invented Quotes
#1. It was not the Jew, of course, who invented the love poem, but the other way around.
Jonathan Safran Foer
#2. All I know is that so long I am asleep I am rid of all fears and hopes and toils and glory, and long live the man who invented sleep, the cloak that covers all human thirst.
Miguel De Cervantes Saavedra
#3. You know who invented the twist, right?" asked the man next to him. "It was John D. Rockefeller. He was a germophobe, and citrus was a natural disinfectant, so Rockefeller always asked his bartenders to run a lemon peel around the rim of his glass.
Elin Hilderbrand
#4. The idiot who invented instant grits also thought of frozen fried chicken, and they ought to lock him up before he tries to freeze-dry collards.
Lewis Grizzard
#5. Who invented the human heart, I wonder? Tell me, and then show me the place where he was hanged.
Lawrence Durrell
#6. She who invented words, and yet does not speak; she who brings dreams and visions, yet does not sleep; she who swallows the storm, yet knows nothing of rain or wind. I speak for her; I am her own.
Catherynne M Valente
#7. He was a wise man who invented God.
Plato
#8. But his father didn't know
And his teachers didn't seem to care
Because they rewarded the ones who invented
Cruel names for the ones the teachers never
rewarded
Matthew Quick
#9. The man who invented the telescope found out more about heaven than the closed eyes of prayer ever discovered.
Robert Green Ingersoll
#10. The most enviable genius in literary history is the guy who invented alphabet soup: nobody knows who he is.
Philip Roth
#11. Hey! D'you guys hear Dr. Atkins died? Slipped on some ice, hit his head, died on life support. The man who invented the all-meat diet ... died a vegetable. That's a damn good joke. But that joke's like a Toyota Camry - reliable, not inspiring.
Christopher Titus
#12. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented the other three, he was a genius.
Sid Caesar
#13. But Alex's last girlfriend? now there was a female human being who had worked hard to deserve her given moniker. As far as i was concerned, she was going to that special circle of hell reserved for Hitler, Jusin Bieber and the man who invented high-waisted jeans.
Lindsey Kelk
#14. Ben Franklin may have discovered electricity- but it is the man who invented the meter who made the money.
Earl Warren
#15. I know only one thing. when i sleep, i know no fear, no, trouble no bliss. blessing on him who invented sleep. the common coin that purchases all things, the balance that levels shepherd and king, fool and wise man. there is only one bad thing about sound sleep. they say it closely resembles death.
Andrei Tarkovsky
#16. I'd like to find the guy who invented the proverb 'go with the flow' and lead him to an ocean full of hungry sharks. And see how he would flow. I'd really like to know.
Dee Lestari
#17. I felt tears sting into my eyes, and took a deep swallow of the first champagne I had ever tasted, remembering that I had read somewhere that the monk who invented it said, on first tasting it, 'It is like drinking stars'.
Anne Rivers Siddons
#18. Get me out of this," Caine demanded.
Quinn said, "It's not so easy. You should know: you're the scumbag who invented cementing.
Michael Grant
#19. We agreed on the basic Brazilian - right after I downed a Vicodin. I don't know who thought up waxing, but it was clearly the same person who invented Vicodin. Finally, the Tuesday of my
Chelsea Handler
#20. If you gave a bag of potato chips to the guy who invented Pringles, he'd look at you like you were trying to hand him an abortion.
Dana Gould
#21. Man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those chambers upright, with the Lord's Prayer or the Shema Yisrael on his lips.
Viktor E. Frankl
#22. It was the Dutch of this era who invented the idea of the home as a personal, intimate space; one might say they invented coziness.
Russell Shorto
#23. I have much to teach you. Come and learn the art of war from the one who invented it. (Takeshi)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#24. He was frigging Dionysus! The man who invented the three-way! He'd had sex every possible way known to man. He'd made improvements to the Kama Sutra. And he was suffering from a major case of wet noodle.
Rosanna Leo
#25. What this world doesn't have is the three-wishes, go-to-the-ball-and-meet-your-prince, happily-ever-after kind of magic. We have all the mangling and malevolent kinds. Who *invented* this system?
Robin McKinley
#26. So I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, it's P something T something R.
Tim Vine
#27. If you want to know, it was the capitalists who invented marriage in order to protect the laws of inheritance.
James Plunkett
#28. Remember, there were dragons long before men came into the world. Why, it was none other than The Great Dragons of Yore who invented the idea of knighthood. Yes, yes, that's right! Dragons had knights, Kings, princesses and queens long before men crawled out of the muck.
Sully Tarnish
#29. Cockroaches were a problem, too, and to me the people who invented Combat, the little black roach-trapping contraption, are urban folk heroes.
Kim Gordon
#30. The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined.
Prince Philip
#31. The music industry was invented, like, 100 years ago. I'm talking about the goddess Matangi, who invented music 5,000 years ago. She was the only thing that inspired me.
M.I.A.
#32. We have come to know Man as he really is. After all, man is that being who invented the gas chambers of Auschwitz; however, he is also that being who entered those gas chambers upright.
Viktor E. Frankl
#33. I was asked by an editor to consider writing something about an American inventor. I asked him if he knew who invented the computer. He said he didn't. In that case, I told him, I should write a book about John Vincent Atanasoff.
Jane Smiley
#34. I'd like to meet the person who invented sex and see what they're working on now.
Groucho Marx
#35. Having an affair with your good friend's wife while he's in an institution and your wife is in a hospital ranks somewhere between Benedict Arnold and the guy who invented Girls Gone Wild on the spectrum of Total Dickheads in American History.
Daniel O'Brien
#36. Childhood is a naturally unhappy period of our existence, Lillian. It was Walt Disney who invented the notion that it has to be happy, simply to make money.
Isabel Allende
#37. I couldn't have invented crisps ... I don't really want to be known as the man who invented crisps ... I invented apples ... I invented pandas, and caps. I invented soil.
Noel Fielding
#38. I'm not a believer, I call myself an atheist. It was man who invented God. I once wrote that there are 15 things I know about God, and one is that he is allergic to shellfish. There are far too many commandments and you really only need one: Do not hurt anybody.
Carl Reiner
#39. The people who invented race, who grouped us together as "black," were inventing and categorizing their ability to do something vicious and wrong.
Jamaica Kincaid
#40. The musician is perhaps the most modest of animals, but he is also the proudest. It is he who invented the sublime art of ruining poetry.
Erik Satie
#41. Ah, these double meanings," she said. "Who invented the English language, I wonder? He did not do a stellar job of it, whoever he was.
Mary Balogh
#42. I like Michael Moore, but I think of him more as a rabble-rouser. On his TV show, when he went to the home of the guy who invented the car alarm and set off all the car alarms on the block ... pretty funny.
P. J. O'Rourke
#43. Oh, that feels good! I don't know who invented ties and then insisted a man was only properly dressed when he wore one, but if I ever meet him, I'll strangle him with his own invention
Colleen McCullough
#44. We enjoy lovely music, beautiful paintings, a thousand intellectual delicacies, but we have no idea of their cost, to those who invented them, in sleepless nights, tears, spasmodic laughter, rashes, asthmas, epilepsies, and the fear of death, which is worse than all the rest.
Marcel Proust
#45. I'm lazy. But it's the lazy people who invented the wheel and the bicycle because they didn't like walking or carrying things.
Lech Walesa
#46. The true success is the person who invented himself.
Al Goldstein
#47. Beginning under the Roman Empire, intellectual leadership in the West had been provided by Christianity. In the middle ages, who invented the first universities - in Paris, Oxford, Cambridge? The church.
Nancy Pearcey
#48. I always admired Ray Kroc, the man who invented McDonald's. Ray had a vision of the most commonplace thing - a hamburger and fries to go - but to him it was just the greatest thing ever, and he was going to make it the greatest thing ever for everybody else, and he did.
David Lee Roth
#49. What ought to be done to the man who invented the celebrating of anniversaries? Mere killing would be too light.
Mark Twain
#50. Surely the ass who invented the first religion ought to be the first ass damned
Mark Twain
#51. Mr. John Coleman, who invented the Weather Channel, represents over 30,000 scientists who cannot get their voices heard on the main stream media, since they hold a viewpoint on Global Warming that runs opposite to the government and media template. The voices of reason are being suppressed.
Peter DeGraaf
#52. The man who invented the Total Perspective Vortex did so basically in order to annoy his wife. Trin
Douglas Adams
#53. Cheesecake. Are you shitting me? Who invented that? Probably Jesus of Nazareth. Or maybe Louis Pasteur. It makes me physically sick to think that Barack Obama won the Nobel Peace Prize, yet the name of the inventor of cheesecake isn't tattooed on Dick Cheney's face.
Rob Delaney
#54. Don't you think if someone like me, someone who invented most of this shit, is scared, don't you think you should be scared, too?
Dave Eggers
#55. The original Jethro Tull was a 19th century English agriculturist who invented a seed drill you see ... the first automatic process where by small holes were made in Mother Earth and even smaller seeds were deposited one at a time and neetly covered over as a cat does after having being naughty.
Ian Anderson
#56. I could create music that sounded as strange as any electronic music, because you see, my opinion about electronic music is that the real composer is the guy who invented the instrument. Pressing buttons is not composing. Composing is about creating something.
Glenn Branca
#57. Philistine must have originally meant, in the mind of those who invented the nickname, a strong, dogged, unenlightened opponent of the chosen people, of the children of the light.
Matthew Arnold
#58. No one knows where he who invented the plow was born, nor where he died; yet he has done more for humanity than the whole race of heroes who have drenched the earth with blood and whose deeds have been handed down with a precision proportionate only to the mischief they wrought.
Charles Caleb Colton
#59. I find it easy to forgive the man who invented a devilish instrument like dynamite, but how can one ever forgive the diabolical mind that invented the Nobel Prize in Literature?
George Bernard Shaw
#60. Unlike Joseph her husband, Mary is neither upright nor pious, but she is not blame for this, the blame lies with the language she speaks if not with the men who invented it, because that language has no feminine form for the words upright and pious.
Jose Saramago
#61. Jesus was a loyal Jew. It was Paul who invented the idea of taking the Jewish God to the Gentiles. Hartung puts it more bluntly than I dare: 'Jesus would have turned over in his grave if he had known that Paul would be taking his plan to the pigs.' Hartung
Richard Dawkins
#62. For the good that I would,'" he quoted, "'I do not; and the evil that I would not, that I do.'" "Who said that?" "The man who invented Christianity - St. Paul.
Aldous Huxley
#63. The author would also like to acknowledge makers of comic book villains and superheroes, those who invented, or at least popularized, the notion of the normal, mild-mannered person transformed into a mutant by freak accident.
Dave Eggers
#64. Q: Who invented mayonnaise? A: Somebody with bad taste.
Barry Raspbody
#65. I don't know who thought up waxing, but it was clearly the same person who invented Vicodin.
Chelsea Handler
#66. He was a wise man who invented beer.
Plato
#67. Scott Fitzgerald said famously that 'he who invented consciousness would have a lot to be blamed for.' But he also forgot that without consciousness, he would have no access to true happiness or even the possibility of transcendence.
Antonio Damasio
#68. He who cares to go to the trouble of demonstrating the uselessness of index numbers for monetary theory and the concrete tasks of monetary policy will be able to select a good proportion of his weapons from the writings of the very men who invented them.
Ludwig Von Mises
#70. If in 100 years I am only known as the man who invented Sherlock Holmes then I will have considered my life a failure.
Arthur Conan Doyle
#71. There is no god, there is no god, there is no god at all. He who invented god is a fool. He who propagates god is a scoundrel. He who worships god is a barbarian.
Periyar E.V. Ramasamy
#72. Yes, I am a terrorist, and proud of it as long as it is against the U.S. government and against Israel, because you are more than terrorists; you are the one who invented terrorism and using it every day. You are butchers, liars and hypocrites.
Ramzi Yousef
#73. Who invented political tolerance? The English invented it, it's something which has taken roots with some difficulty in Scottish politics.
Neal Ascherson
#74. The Swedish engineer who invented the zip fastener made a greater intellectual leap than many scientists do in a lifetime.
Martin Rees
#75. I don't know who invented high heels, but all women owe him a lot!
Marilyn Monroe
#76. Man who invented the hamburger was smart; man who invented the cheeseburger was a genius.
Matthew McConaughey
#77. I have four older siblings and one younger, and all three of my brothers are in the music industry. My dad was really involved in music, too, with the disco, and he also started Radio Caroline and was the one who invented pirate radio, if you like, off on a coast in England on a boat.
Liberty Ross
#78. She knew only one hint left by Rob: Enigma. There had been a few genius mathematicians who invented much more than a computing-like device, they figured out one of the most important intelligence formulas. Rob had programmed it in the Mold language.
J.M.K. Walkow
#79. A woman who was a schoolgirl at Hiroshima asked, "Those scientists who invented the atomic bomb, what did they think would happen if they dropped it?
Jonathan Glover
#81. I hate phones," he grumbled into her neck. "Seriously, I wanna go back in time and murder Alexander Graham Bell." He sat up with a groan. "Or was it Edison who invented the phone? I can never remember."
She had to laugh. "I'm pretty sure it was Bell.
Elle Kennedy
#82. It wasn't an architect or a designer who invented objects, but an artisan.
Giorgetto Giugiaro
#83. The man who invented Doritos has passed away at the age of 97. He asked to be buried with the creator of Fritos and Cheetos in a variety pack.
Jimmy Fallon
#84. Imagination is a very precise thing, you know - it is not fantasy; the man who invented the wheel while he was observing another man walking - that is imagination!
Jacques Lipchitz
#85. I wonder if the highlighter was highlight of the career for the person who invented it?
Ryan Lilly
#86. Iv. who was it who invented size zero? who was it who promised that if you got to a certain point you would no longer be?
David Levithan
#87. Dionysus invented wine, which so impressed his father Zeus that he promoted Dionysus to god. The guy who invented prune juice, by contrast, got sentenced to the Fields of Punishment.
Rick Riordan
#89. The man who invented instant pudding was moved to action by an inability to wait for pudding.
Dana Gould
#90. Blessed be he who invented sleep, a cloak that covers all a man's thoughts.
Miguel De Cervantes
#91. What if it was cats who invented technology, would they have TV shows starring rubber sqeaky toys?
Douglas Coupland
#92. We Americans, who invented traffic, are always being startled by the forms into which it has evolved around the world.
P. J. O'Rourke
#93. My grandfather was an engineer who invented the automatic pilot for airplanes.
Temple Grandin
#95. It is not the men who are in command of the bulldozers. It is the bulldozer who invented men, and then, since they failed to interest it, obliterated them with its muscular arm.
Jean-Marie G. Le Clezio
#96. I've long stopped worrying about who invented whom - God man or man God.
Fyodor Dostoevsky
#97. A lot of the music that you listen to now is because of the things that the Meters did, the Neville Brothers did, and they're there, the guys who invented those beats that the guys sample today. Such an enormous opportunity.
Harry Connick Jr.
#98. Also learned that the ones who invented the notion that work is ennobling were the same ones who drank and ate all night long with beautiful women on their knees, the rich ones, who could be as happy as little children
Anonymous
#99. She did know that once tattooed one could no longer expect to lie for all eternity in an orthodox Jewish cemetery. They wouldn't even bury women with pierced ears. A strange theory of mutilation from the people who invented cutting the skin off the pee-pee.
Tom Robbins
#100. The founders of Snapchat last year turned down a $3 billion offer from Facebook and a $4 billion offer from Google. It was a surprising show of integrity from the guys who invented the app that lets you look at pictures of boobs for five seconds.
Cecily Strong
