Top 100 Quotes About Monkeys
#1. It is not improbable that in hot countries, monkeys may have enslaved girls.
Voltaire
#2. When I was a little girl, I loved monkeys. I wanted to be a primatologist. I went to the careers office to ask how. Because nobody could give me a good answer, I opted for acting.
Audrey Tautou
#3. Are you an evolutionist?
I'm an absurdist, ma'am. But let's suppose evolution is true; what about the monkeys today? Why can't we see them evolving? Are they still evolving?
Harrison Wheeler
#4. 'Monkeys' is made up of nine short stories that tell an overall story. 'Folly' is a series of vignettes all put together to tell a larger story. In 'Lust and Other Stories,' there are nine stories - three, three, three; the beginnings of love, the middles, and the afters.
Susan Minot
#6. Sixty eight percent of Republicans don't believe in evolution. On the other hand, only five percent of monkeys believe in Republicans.
Stephen Colbert
#7. If one puts an infinite number of monkeys in front of typewriters, and lets them clap away, there is a certainty that one of them will come out with an exact version of the 'Iliad.'
Nassim Nicholas Taleb
#8. People might say, What's so great about the Arctic Monkeys? I've never even seen them. Well, you've never seen God either. You're gonna tell me he's not awesome?
Christian Finnegan
#9. onanists breaking a sweat on monkeys, ponies, birds;
Yann Martel
#10. Southerners ask intimate questions in the way monkeys groom each other for lice, not to pry but to make you feel cared for.
Reynolds Price
#11. Some of the films that I have really enjoyed include: The Fifth Element, The Crow, Toys, Seven, Forrest Gump, The Lion King, 12 Monkeys, Doctor Zhivago, Being There, and Trainspotting.
Frederick Lenz
#12. Artists are not your art monkeys. They are your collaborators. They should be given all due consideration to follow their journey.
Brian Michael Bendis
#13. [monkeys] are used only when no other species and no alternatice approach can provide the answers to questions about such conditions as Alzhemers, stroke, Parkinson's, spinal injury, hormone disorders, and vaccines for HIV
Colin Blakemore
#14. People said that he was very nice, but I confess that his utter grotesqueness made me uneasy; perhaps in the same way that the sight of monkeys eating their own excrement turns some people's stomachs. They might not mind so much if monkeys did not- so grotesquely- resemble human beings.
James Baldwin
#15. Being butchered by monkeys is pretty low on my list of ways to go.
Brandon Mull
#16. Too many people not enough monkeys
Anonymous
#17. Flying monkeys?" the Gasman called out a guess. "Like in the Wizard of Oz?"
It dawned on me then. "No," I said tersely "Worse. Flying Erasers.
James Patterson
#18. If God didn't mean for us to use drugs, It would never have made us such curious monkeys, nor given us so many interesting vegetables.
Charles L. Smith
#20. You belong with us, the lost of the lost, the tribe without a home, a tribe of orphans living our abandoned lives amid toys and trinkets, stuffed monkeys and bears. You're one of us now - the Tribe of the Teddy Bear. From Tribe of the Teddy Bear
J. Joseph Wright
#21. The monkeys ignored him completely as they discussed wind currents and angle of approach, and even the Lion seemed to have forgotten he was there. He might as well be back in that field tied to a post for all the good the Wizard's gifts were doing him.
Danielle Paige
#22. I don't have time for lie-on-the-beach vacations. I'm a zoo person. There's one in New Jersey where animals actually come up to your car. I love the monkeys - I used to give them bubblegum to chew.
Missy Elliot
#23. We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special.
Stephen Hawking
#24. I think when there's so much information to be eaten up, and so many ways to do it, people cling to groups. I think we, as monkeys, want to live in smaller groups.
Kristen Bell
#25. Spanish was weird that way: two words for monkeys, and esposas meant both wives and handcuffs. That said a lot.
Ann Aguirre
#27. Philosophers and scientists confidently offer up traits said to be uniquely human, and the monkeys and apes casually knock them down
toppling the pretension that humans constitute some sort of biological aristocracy among the beings on Earth.
Carl Sagan
#28. When you are brought up in a zoo, you know what's going on in the monkey house. You see a couple of monkeys loose and one is President and one is Vice President, you know it's trouble. Monkeys make trouble.
Gore Vidal
#29. I listen to 50 Cent, Jay-Z, Stereophonics, Arctic Monkeys; also the musical Oliver - I can sing every tune.
Wayne Rooney
#30. The monkeys, she explained, were considered reincarnated politicians, which made Rue laugh and the stick entirely understandable.
Gail Carriger
#31. All the musicians I loved growing up were men. I loved Leonard Cohen, Mick Jagger. I loved Alex Turner from the Arctic Monkeys. Even today, I love Van McCann from Catfish and the Bottlemen and Matt Healy from The 1975.
Halsey
#32. I got quite annoyed after the Haiti earthquake. A baby was taken from the wreckage and people said it was a miracle. It would have been a miracle had God stopped the earthquake. More wonderful was that a load of evolved monkeys got together to save the life of a child that wasn't theirs.
Terry Pratchett
#33. I think that we, as monkeys, want to live in smaller groups. It's very scary when we're all - as wonderful as it is - connected.
Kristen Bell
#34. Fear, greed, and ego are very expensive monkeys to have on your back while trading.
Steve Burns
#35. Security people are often the black-and-white kind of people that I can't stand. I think the OpenBSD crowd is a bunch of masturbating monkeys, in that they make such a big deal about concentrating on security to the point where they pretty much admit that nothing else matters to them.
Linus Torvalds
#37. We take care of each other like two monkeys picking each other's nits. Folks underestimate a good nit-pick.
Karen Marie Moning
#38. There are quite a few actors in the business who are much more difficult than kids or monkeys.
Paul Hogan
#39. If you could cross a lion and a monkey, that's what I'd be, because monkeys are funny and lions are strong.
Marlon Wayans
#40. We are buried beneath the weight of information, which is being confused with knowledge; quantity is being confused with abundance and wealth with happiness.
We are monkeys with money and guns.
Tom Waits
#41. If you ever start taking things too seriously, just remember that we are talking monkeys on an organic spaceship flying through the universe.
Joe Rogan
#42. Because when you got right down to it, humans were still just curious monkeys. They still had to poke everything they found with a stick to see what it did.
James S.A. Corey
#43. She's been a barrel of bitchy monkeys since Jordan and I walked out of the Arrivals gate together earlier this afternoon.
Victoria Denault
#44. People have always called me Schneider Monkey just because of my energy and mass consumption of bananas. Plus, I just love monkeys, so I thought, 'Well, I love monkeys, I love my fans, why not put the two together?'
Max Schneider
#45. Each of us promenades his thought, like a monkey on a leash. When you read, you always have to such monkeys: your own and one belonging to someone else. Or, even worse, a monkey and a hyena. Now, consider what you will feed them. For a hyena does not eat the same things as a monkey ...
Milorad Pavic
#46. If you pay peanuts, you wind up hiring monkeys.
Hannibal
#47. With every passing year we discover more evidence to support Darwin's revolutionary hypothesis that the cognitive and emotional lives of animals differ only by degree, from the fishes to the birds to the monkeys to humans.
Roger Fouts
#48. We have changed. We are no longer, as I said, bipedal monkeys. We are instead a kind of cybernetic coral reef of organic components and inorganic technological components.
Terence McKenna
#49. Your own space, man, it's so important. That's why we were doomed because we didn't have any. It is like monkeys in a zoo. They die. You know, everything needs to be left alone.
George Harrison
#50. In Kenya you've got the great birds and monkeys leaping through the trees overhead. It's a chance to remember what the world is really like.
Joanna Lumley
#51. The brain works in a holistic, cooperative way that makes our basest desire or most abject fear as expressive of who we are as abstract thinking of the highest order. That means that we are all equal part snakes, monkeys, and spacemen.
David Amerland
#52. Monkeys who very sensibly refrain from speech, lest they should be set to earn their livings.
Kenneth Grahame
#53. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
Steven Wright
#54. When either one of us gets an order from Wolfe that isn't mind-bleedingly stupid there will be no way you will miss it, as we will both be leaping up and down and screaming uncontrollably, like adolescent monkeys, in our shock.
Lia Habel
#55. It was a mystery to me. To that awful black-and-white farm, with that aunt who was dressed badly, with smelly farm animals around when she could live with winged monkeys and magic shoes and gay lions. I didn't get it.
John Waters
#56. We made it nearly 20 centuries, a bunch of monkeys with PH Ds.
Jimmy Buffett
#57. Y'know,' he said, 'it's very hard to talk quantum using a language originally designed to tell other monkeys where the ripe fruit is.
Terry Pratchett
#58. I tried to copy my parents, as monkeys do, but they were trying to copy me, looking to the child for the energy and hope they had long since lost.
Jeanette Winterson
#60. Allowing liberals to manage economic policy is like hiring monkeys to be aircraft mechanics.
James Cook
#61. I don't understand why women get upset when you compare them to one of the monkeys from Planet of the Apes, even one of the heroic ones, like Dr. Zera.
David James
#62. Yeah and purple monkeys fly from my ass at dawn.
Diana Graves
#63. Why is it alright to be going around, going mental with a gun, shooting all the monkeys and killing them? Because one day we're going to run out.
Karl Pilkington
#64. Many kinds of monkeys have a strong taste for tea, coffee and spirituous liqueurs.
Charles Darwin
#65. Now run along and play, but don't get into trouble. George promised to be good. But it is easy for little monkeys to forget.
H. A. Rey
#66. We're the propaganda monkeys.
The digital download junkies.
The skunk smoking geezers
With an inflatable Jesus.
We're the kitsch and cool.
Divide and rule.
Harry Whitewolf
#67. Meet the new witch, same as the old bitch. We monkeys have dinged enough dongs to know.
Danielle Paige
#68. They gave 12 monkeys a typewriter for a week, and after a week, they only used it as a bathroom.
Robin Ince
#69. And this is the straight dope, right here. These people are not exactly human. They don the dress but they're like monkeys dolled up in the circus. They're clever and can learn, but that is all.
Philip K. Dick
#70. I was like a packet of powdered Sea Monkeys and they were like water.
Augusten Burroughs
#71. Scientists believe that monkeys can be taught to think, lie and even play politics within their community. If we can just teach them to cheat on their wives we can save millions on congressional salaries.
Jay Leno
#72. Her mother was a Rutherford. The family came over in the ark, and were connected by marriage with Henry the VIII. On her father's side they date back further than Adam. On the topmost branches of her family tree there's a superior breed of monkeys with very fine silky hair and extra long tails.
Jean Webster
#73. People and gorillas, horses and duikers and pigs, monkeys and chimps and bats and viruses: We're all in this together.
David Quammen
#75. From the walls of Baidi high in the coloured dawn To Jiangling by night-fall is three hundred miles, Yet monkeys are still calling on both banks behind me To my boat these ten thousand mountains away.
Li Bai
#76. If you want me to be straight, gay, into monkeys, dating Kylie, whatever, I'm happy for people to project whatever onto me!
Darren Hayes
#77. God likes a little humor, as is evidence by the fact that he made the monkeys, the parrot
and some of you people.
Billy Sunday
#78. He wondered how the little crud monkeys were doing in New York. He hoped they were still having fun harassing Romans, stealing lots of shiny zippers and causing legionnaires' pants to fall down.
Rick Riordan
#79. Probably the difference between man and the monkeys is that the monkeys are merely bored, while man has boredom plus imagination.
Lin Yutang
#80. When we were monkeys, we were more human because we were at least not destroying the nature those days!
Mehmet Murat Ildan
#81. You know what, evolution is a myth ... Why aren't monkeys still evolving into humans?
Christine O'Donnell
#82. If living on fruits and water is of superior merit, monkeys and fish will go to heaven before men.
Meera
#83. In trees, monkeys rule;
on land, lions rule;
in the sky, eagles rule;
in the waters, whales rule.
Matshona Dhliwayo
#84. He inspected my shirt - Don't Make Me Get My Flying Monkeys.
Nicole Williams
#85. There is no review process, Doc. This isn't a government thing. Hell, it's not even a business. It's just us monkeys flying fast and tryin' t keep our butts out of the engine plume.
James S.A. Corey
#86. The Destiny of Man is to unite, not to divide. If you keep on dividing you end up as a collection of monkeys throwing nuts at each other out of separate trees.
T.H. White
#88. We are all just monkeys with money and guns.
Tom Waits
#89. My company is called Talking Monkey, Inc. It's because that's what I think all people are: talking monkeys.
Joe Rogan
#90. The practice of meditation is represented by the three monkeys, who cover their eyes, ears and mouths so as to avoid the phenomenal world.
Wei Wu Wei
#91. [Stephanie] That's not the point. I can't just let monkeys loose in Trenton.
[Lula] Why not? There's all kinds of crazy shit loose in Trenton.
Janet Evanovich
#92. My first attempts to transmit typhus to laboratory animals, including the smaller species of monkeys, had failed, as had those of my predecessors, for reasons which I can easily supply today.
Charles Jules Henry Nicole
#93. Monkeys don't enjoy or appreciate flavours. Experts have told us that human beings are the only beings that can appreciate food at this higher level and the only living beings that cook.
Ferran Adria
#96. "More fun than a barrel of monkeys." Has anyone ever stopped to think how cranky, if not downright vicious, a barrelful of monkeys would be, especially once released from the barrel?
Tom Shales
#99. Nor the dog she carries in her arms. Your power over our band is now ended, and you will never see us again. Then all the Winged Monkeys, with much laughing and chattering and noise,
L. Frank Baum
#100. Cats and monkeys - monkeys and cats - all human life is there!
Henry James
