Quotes About A Giraffe

#1. My favourite animal is the koala, but his life would be boring. I would rather be a giraffe so that I could contemplate the beauty of Africa.

Caterina Murino

#2. Why would you want to go all the way to Africa and shoot a giraffe? I don't think you can eat him. I only shoot stuff I can eat.

Boo Weekley

#3. A man and a giraffe walk into a bar and they proceed to get blitzed. The giraffe drinks so much he passes out on the floor. The man gets up and heads for the door, at which point the bartender yells, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" "That's not a lion! It's a giraffe.

Barry Dougherty

#4. I don't care what color the parents are. I don't care if it's a giraffe and a fish living together. If they're raising children who believe they're honored and loved, that's all that's important.

Patricia Polacco

#5. I have people trying to kill me. A giraffe is low on my list of disturbances.

Janet Evanovich

#6. Antonina woke in the night to help midwife an animal like a giraffe (always tricky because the mother gives birth standing up, the calf falls headfirst, and the mother doesn't want help anyway). This

Diane Ackerman

#7. A brick could be used like a giraffe could be used as a neck warmer. You could also use my foreskin.

Jarod Kintz

#8. Art is limitation; the essence of every picture is the frame. If you draw a giraffe, you must draw him with a long neck. If in your bold creative way you hold yourself free to draw a giraffe with a short neck, you will really find that you are not free to draw a giraffe.

G.K. Chesterton

#9. The tall form of the young professor of mental science discussing on the landing a case of conscience with his class like a giraffe cropping high leafage among a herd of antelopes

James Joyce

#10. On the neck of a giraffe a flea begins to believe in immortality.

Bill Vaughan

#11. Who could believe an ant in theory? A giraffe in blueprint? Ten thousand doctors of what's possible Could reason half the jungle out of being.

John Ciardi

#12. Are you aware, Mr Mayor, then when casually scrying the streets of London, you stand out like a giraffe on roller skates, yes?

Kate Griffin

#13. It's an incredibly difficult thing to bring a giraffe down. They can kill a lion with a single blow from their feet.

Joanna Lumley

#14. Give me a black man, a white woman, a giraffe, a zebra anything but another white man! That last one f***ed up my roof!

Chris Rock

#15. How would you lift a giraffe with one hand? It doesn't matter as you won't find any one-handed giraffes! ***

Various

#16. I know who I am. No one else knows who I am. If I was a giraffe, and someone said I was a snake, I'd think, no, actually I'm a giraffe.

Richard Gere

#17. I have a toy giraffe on my bed. I've got photographs over my desk as well as a mask of a giraffe in my kitchen. I am totally hooked.

Joanna Lumley

#18. The thing about owls is that they do sort of have this facial disc, which is unlike any other bird. They kind of have a face, more than like a dog or a giraffe. They have this weird, alien face that you can actually make expressive.

Zack Snyder

#19. You can't always write a chord ugly enough to say what you want to say, so sometimes you have to rely on a giraffe filled with whipped cream.

Frank Zappa

#20. His heart beat so rapidly it might burst; he kept telling himself everything was fine so long as he remained a giraffe.

Andrew Sturm

#21. Sofia was ice. She was ripples. She was the kind of person who'd sneak into the zoo after hours just to paint an extra spot on a giraffe's neck. She was stubborn. She was lovely. She was the autumn leaf that refused to fall.

Michael Ebner

#22. Gonzo leaps like a giraffe and grabs it.

Jerry Coleman

#23. You need that guy like a giraffe needs strep throat.

Ann Landers

#24. In a Giraffe institution, the head nurse job would be to serve the nurses, not to control them. Teachers are there to serve the students, not control them.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

#25. I have friends who come to the Australia Zoo, and it's just, instead of playing video games, we get to hug and kiss a giraffe or walk a tiger.

Bindi Irwin

#26. A man is born an artist as a hippopotamus is born a hippopotamus; and you can no more make yourself one than you can make yourself a giraffe.

Alain De Botton

#27. Wildlife is something which man cannot construct. Once it is gone, it is gone forever. Man can rebuild a pyramid, but he can't rebuild ecology, or a giraffe.

Joy Adamson

#28. No Child Left Behind ... is a giraffe with an elephant's body ... You can't take the vision of Ted Kennedy and merge it to the public policy of George Bush and come out with anything that works.

Steve Rauschenberger

#29. Sometimes facing opportunity is like staring at the knees of a giraffe.

Laurie Beth Jones

#30. This is Deirdre," said Addison. "She's an emu-raffe, which is a bit like a donkey and a giraffe put together, only with fewer legs and a peevish temper. She's a terrible sore loser at cards," he added in a whisper. "Never play an emu-raffe at cards. Say hello, Deirdre!

Ransom Riggs

#31. But telling a giraffe killer that I need someone is not an option.

Nikki Godwin

#32. A penguin cannot become a giraffe, so just be the best penguin you can be.

Gary Vaynerchuk

#33. Did you ever see a giraffe? It is like something from between the regions of truth and fiction.

Geraldine Jewsbury

#34. He was in his mid-thirties, tall and pale and thin, with long, sandy hair and rimless glasses, dressed in brown polyester pants, cheap brown shoes, and a light tan shirt. He looked like someone had put a wig on a giraffe and run it through the local Target.

John Connolly

#35. I'm a giraffe. I even walk like a giraffe with a long neck and legs. It's a pretty dumb animal, mind you.

Sophia Loren

#36. When Andy Carroll first appeared on the scene he was a tall skinny kid and his coordination was all over the place. He reminded me of a giraffe.

Glenn Roeder

#37. A giraffe has a black tongue twenty-seven inches long and no vocal cords. A giraffe has nothing to say. He just goes on giraffing.

Robert Fulghum

#38. I'd hate to be a giraffe with a sore throat.

Mitch Hedberg

#39. I was once kissed on the lips by a giraffe, and I don't think I've ever got over it.

Joanna Lumley

#40. Your legs are so long," he whispered as he caressed my thigh. "Like a giraffe."
"Uh, thanks?"
"I feel like Curious George climbing all over you.

Jim Provenzano

#41. Why didn't evolution make a giraffe good at carpentry so it could build a ladder?

Karl Pilkington

#42. That's just how time travel looks like to the untrained eye. The reason why there aren't more travelers is that your average physicist refuses to be eaten by a giraffe in the name of science.

Bradley Sands

#43. I saw a giraffe with a short neck
That was sad
Or a deer

Bo Burnham

#44. Hyypia rises like a giraffe to head the ball clear

George Hamilton

#45. We moved in bursts, with me on point and Marcus at the rear, everyone moving quietly except Sebastian, who was about as stealthy as a giraffe.

"Get quiet and low," I whispered to him.

He ducked his head, taking him to an almost invisible six-foot-two.

Veronica Rossi

#46. Negotiating the Goodreads interface is like returning a giraffe's eyelashes to their follicles after a Napalm attack using only a rolling pin and a bucket.

Steve Whitmore

#47. Another Thing I'm Sick of Hearing:
If I started that gay rights group,
I must be gay.
So if i start an animal rights group,
what does that make me?
A giraffe?

James Howe

#48. I would be a giraffe because I just want to experience what a sore throat and being a giraffe feels like. It would be really uncomfortable walking around in the Sahara and being like, 'I really need, like, 15 lozenges for my giraffe body.'

Charlie Puth

#49. A giraffe is so much a lady that one refrains from thinking of her legs, but remembers her as floating over the plains in long garb, draperies of morning mist her mirage.

Isak Dinesen

#50. A bit of advice: never read a pop-up book about giraffes.

Sean Lock

#51. My childhood was really comfortable and secure, but school was a nightmare. I was a lot taller than the other girls and they called me Gitte the giraffe.

Brigitte Nielsen

#52. Today, I have seen a lonely giraffe attacked and eaten by ten lions. This cannot be God's Order; this is obviously Devil's Order! God is not here, even though the fools claim the opposite!

Mehmet Murat Ildan

#53. People are the only animals that drink the milk of the mother of another species. All other animals stop drinking milk altogether after weaning. It is unnatural for a dog to nurse from a mother giraffe; it is just as unnatural for a human being to drink the milk of a cow.

Michael Klaper

#54. I remember once reading that it is still not understood how the giraffe manages to pump an adequate blood supply all the way up to its head; but it is hard to imagine that anyone would conclude tht giraffes do not have long necks. At least not anyone who had ever been to a zoo

Robert Solow

#55. A man was taken to the Zoo and shown the giraffe. After gazing at it a little in silence: 'I don't believe it,' he said.

Dorothy L. Sayers

#56. In the giraffe with a total height of 5 m., the heart is at a height of about 2.5 m., and it would be extremely interesting to know just how the giraffe avoids the development of filtration oedema in its long legs.

August Krogh

#57. If we were to judge nature by its common sense or likelihood, we wouldn't believe the world existed. In nature, improbabilities are the one stock in trade. The whole creation is one lunatic fringe ... No claims of any and all revelations could be so far-fetched as a single giraffe.

Annie Dillard

#58. All you do is to look / At a page in this book / Because that's where we always will be. / No book ever ends / When it's full of your friends / The Giraffe and the Pelly and me.

Roald Dahl

#59. And here's the good part: He got a tongue could measure twenty-one inches. Bet Mrs. Giraffe likes that one.

Janet Evanovich

#60. Before I die I want to have kids. Live in London. Own a pet giraffe. Skydive. Divide by zero. Play the piano. Speak French. Write a book. Travel to a different planet. Be a better dad than mine was. Feel good about myself. Go to New York City. Know equality. Live.

Jennifer Niven

#61. If you are a jackal, you will try to reassure. Jackals try to fix people in pain. They can't stand pain, but make matters worse by trying to get rid of it. Put on giraffe ears. Try to hear what they are feeling and needing.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

#62. When asked if he was a basketball player he replied No I clean giraffe ears.

Elvin Hayes

#63. That's the thing about my father. You never know when he's hiding a giant surprise giraffe head from you.

Jenny Lawson

#64. I hear the Sophie Giraffe is great for teething. Another thing I really love right now is the Moby Baby Carrier. To me, it seems like a natural way to hold the baby close to you. I also love the burp cloths, bibs, and swaddle blankets from Aden and Anais. Their stuff is organic and pure.

Vanessa Lachey

#65. As a woman, it seems you can't just be a comedian; you're always classed as something else, too, whether that's 'beautiful,' 'pint-sized,' 'larger-than-life' or in my case, 'Hattie Jacques-esque,' 'the giraffe,' 'big.'

Miranda Hart