Old Guy Sayings

#1. I had to audition for the part of Jnior, and I wanted the role terribly because I knew it was a great character. This guy is a wonderful, funny, mean old guy.

Dominic Chianese

#2. Choreographers use me as the old guy who still dances. Not that I put on white tights.

Mikhail Baryshnikov

#3. At the risk of sounding like that old guy in 'Gran Torino' telling those 'young punks' to 'get off my lawn,' it's gotten to the point that whenever I hear somebody talking about Twitter or twittering or tweeting, it just makes my little tummy want to hurl.

John Ridley

#4. Not all writers are artists. But all of us like the idea of somebody in the year 2283 blowing the dust off one of our books, thumbing through it and exclaiming, Hey, listen to what this old guy had to say back in the twentieth century!

William Attwood

#5. If there is a public perception at all, they see the producer as a big old guy who smokes a cigar and has lots of money and lots of power. That's not what a producer is and, if it ever was what a producer was, it certainly hasn't been for a long time.

Marshall Herskovitz

#6. I'm [Paul O'Neill] an old guy, and I'm rich. And there's nothing they can do to hurt me.

Ron Suskind

#7. Some old guy once said that the meaning of life is that it ends.

Lee Child

#8. When you win an award from the Grammys, it means a lot 'cause it's voted on by 100% by the people. It's not like some old guy sitting at a desk picking. It's doesn't work like that. It's voted on by your peers in the music industry.

Paul Wall

#9. Underneath the picture of a really old guy, Lisa read, "Chess, like music and love, has the power to make men happy.

Jesse Kraai

#10. Yes, e-commerce is a strange situation for an old guy like me. You can buy a TV online, OK, but to buy a dress or shoes? Ugh. The customer has to go back to the store and breathe and smell and have a good time. Because shopping is a good time - like going to a nice restaurant.

Max Azria

#11. When I have a difficult decision to make, I imagine myself as a 90-year-old guy looking back on his life. I imagine what I'll think about myself at that point in time, and it always makes it really easy to go for it. You're only going to regret that you wimped out.

Nick Woodman

#12. I'm a product of good nutrition, cutting edge supplementation and hard training, and I'm an old guy.

Warren Cuccurullo

#13. I'm more like a senior adviser so I don't like to come in here and try to take over. Just like your basic karate movie where the young guys come to the old guys with beards who have them do weird stuff to get to the other side. That's who I am, the old guy with a long beard.

Shaquille O'Neal

#14. So how did you wind up joining the Rebellion?"
"An old guy and a kid were looking for a ride and I needed the money," Han said. "After that, it was just bad luck.

James S.A. Corey

#15. You never knew if he was nodding a lot because he was thinking and all, or just because he was a nice old guy that didn't know his ass from his elbow.

J.D. Salinger

#16. I'm a 50 year-old guy and I'm not in shape like I was when I was 30.

Richard Gere

#17. I will be the 43-year-old guy in the jumpsuit. In my estimation and my image of myself is that I am 23 and can get away with it. If I didn't have the show, I would be in one right now. It would be denim, but I love a terry.

Andy Cohen

#18. I was a door-to-door window salesmen in what feels like a cheap, creepy pedophile situation. And I can say that because we were a bunch of kids driving around in the back of some old guy's van and it was creepy. Now that I look back on it I get chills of creepiness.

Joseph Bruce

#19. When I started 'DailyGrace,' I was dating a 26-year-old guy I thought was the funniest person in the world. My creation process every day was imagining him watching my videos and wondering, 'Will he laugh at this?' But somehow that's turned into an audience that's mostly 15-year-old girls.

Grace Helbig

#20. Of course, anybody's who's 26 years old will probably say, "Of course the old guy would say that." But wait until you're 45 or 46 years old. See how you feel about it then.

Thomas Haden Church

#21. I have an easy tendency to stumble and fall, which is not a good thing in an 84-year-old guy, so when I brush my teeth, then I do balancing exercises.

Walter Mischel

#22. You're starting to get old guy syndrome, Professor." "You mean because I sound like I long for a past that can never be regained?

John Lyman

#23. I wanted to be that cranky old guy that stands on his porch and yells at the neighborhood kids.

Robert Lansing

#24. If you want to see what I'll look like as an old guy, check out any recent photo of me.

Dana Gould

#25. Because this isn't the movies, Doc. In the real world, when a seventeen-year-old guy gets a love letter from his best friend, he doesn't suddenly decide to love her back. He runs screaming.

Aimee L. Salter

#26. I'd rather get to the 70-year-old guy who's got plenty of cash.

Bernie Ecclestone

#27. I think a lot of kids get scared by 'E.T.' Sometimes when I do the science-fiction conventions, I'll have a 35-year-old guy with tatts and piercings all over, and he comes up and says, 'You know, it scared me so much I still can't watch it.'

Dee Wallace

#28. He hated to admit it, but this was one of the things about demon amnesia that bothered him the most. What kind of seventeen-year-old guy doesn't know whether or not he's a virgin?

Cassandra Clare

#29. He hums a little. He's a really old guy with an English accent, he might have a goatee, and he'll definitely be carrying around a really thick, boring book. You might be able to pry it from his decaying hands and beat him back to death with it. Or maybe just reading it to him would work.

Kasie West

#30. But when I am around strangers, I turn into a conversational Mount St. Helens. I'm dormant, dormant, quiet, quiet, old-guy loners build log cabins on the slopes of my silence and then, boom, it's 1980. Once I erupt, they'll be wiping my verbal ashes off their windshields as far away as North Dakota.

Sarah Vowell

#31. They often ask me to shoot for them. But I say no. I think an old guy like me ought not take pages away from young photographers who need the exposure.

Helmut Newton

#32. I'm a 50-year-old guy making music for over 20 years. I've been writing songs since I was 20, so it's really been 30 years, and it's always been personal, but I've always told stories.

Art Alexakis

#33. Today Mitt Romney is 68 years old. It's kind of sad, a 68-year-old guy with no job, no future - wait a minute, that's me.

David Letterman

#34. An old guy was asked if he had ever googled himself. Probably not computer literate, he answered: "Of course, we all did, but we didn't call it that.

Mike Bove

#35. I'm officially near-famous. If you've got four year old kids and you've got cable, then you've got no choice but to know who I am. But if you're one of my peers - a 26-year old guy who lives in Manhattan - you have no idea who I am. I'm only famous if you're four.

Steve Burns

#36. The BBC is the greatest broadcaster in the world. It's the standard that everyone measures themselves against. If we lose the BBC, it won't be quite as bad as losing the royal family, but an integral part of this country will have gone. But then, I'm an old guy.

Terry Wogan

#37. Meg makes a face and lays her hand on my arm. "And why, exactly, would John want to see Eurotrash?"
"Hello?" Ryan says. "Because he's a seventeen-year old guy with normal male urges, and she's got-" He holds both hands out from his chest.
"Really pretty eyes," I complete his sentence.

Alex Flinn

#38. She reached down and picked up one of the stakes she'd dropped, running the tip along her thigh as she straightened. "Want to play hunter and vampire?"
Reynard quirked his eyebrow. "Madam, I came equipped with my own stake."
"Whoa! Points to the old guy.

Sharon Ashwood

#39. I'm an old guy. I don't hustle and I don't bustle. So sometimes you're behind, but that's okay. Your peace of mind is more important. I have seen the people who hustle and bustle, and they are already gone, at a young age. They could have enjoyed life.

Kumar Pallana

#40. I'm an old guy, and I was protesting during the Vietnam War. We killed fifty Asians for every loyal American. Every artist worth a damn in this country was terribly opposed to that war, finally, when it became evident what a fiasco and meaningless butchery it was.

Kurt Vonnegut

#41. When you start performing, you realize that you have to separate yourself from the pack. So I would never wear bell-bottoms, which everybody else was wearing. I had short hair - and to see a 21-year-old guy walk onstage without longish hair was, in itself, weird. Every entertainer needs a shtick.

Loudon Wainwright III

#42. I know my age is a little older and some people might say, 'hey this guy's an old guy'. But I'm learning every day. I don't feel like an old guy. I feel like I'm young. I feel like I'm in there just learning so much stuff. I'm just doing a whole lot more different things than I was before.

George Tahdooahnippah

#43. I was involved in the robbery for a purpose, and that was because I knew somebody who could drive a diesel train. I was responsible to take along this old guy who could drive the train.

Ronald Biggs

#44. One day, if I'm very lucky, I'll be a shriveled 100-year old guy with a cane. An old man with a kid's mind, wondering how the hell this could have happened.

Johnny B. Truant

#45. I'm an old guy, so I started out playing 'Pong' with my brothers, and 'Mario Bros.' and whatnot. But we really got involved and got intense when 'Tecmo Super Bowl' came out. That's when we really started playing video games, and it got intense.

Kevin Dillon

#46. I loved Allan Dwan. He was a tough old guy.

Harry Carey Jr.

#47. There's something profoundly disturbing about watching an old guy eat a sandwich.

Dana Gould

#48. I have seen the people who hustle and bustle, and they are already gone, at a young age. I'm an old guy. I've been doing this a long time. And I don't hustle and I don't bustle.

Kumar Pallana

#49. One of my earliest memories is my father telling me to behave because I'm about to meet and work with the greatest actor of all time. Then this old guy comes out and I was like, 'Pfff, he doesn't look anything like Luke Skywalker, I don't know what my dad is trying to tell me here.'

Sean Maguire

#50. I mean, do you believe in God or what? " "Not the name-brand God they serve here." Tim said. "That old guy with the beard, granting wishes out of the clouds to whoever says the most rosaries. That's bullshit. I believe in everything.

Chris Fuhrman

#51. I still feel like an immature idiot inside, but I look in the mirror and - as a friend of mine once said- this old guy keeps getting in the way.

Ray Romano

#52. When they come out to my shows they like me but trying to get them to come out to my shows they're like "I don't want to go and see that old guy" But when they do they totally get it ...

Fred Eaglesmith

#53. Tradition or not, I sometimes thought putting children on an old guy's lap was already creepy enough. We didn't need to mix alcohol into it.

Richelle Mead

#54. I've finally become an old guy.

Anton Corbijn

#55. I think I'm a much better father as an older man than I was with my first kids. Occasionally, I have to yell at the little guys, but they don't take me seriously. 'Listen to the old guy,' they say. 'Isn't he great? He's mad.'

Kris Kristofferson

#56. When you're 20 you can put a ton of old-age prosthetics on and be an old guy, but when you're 70 you can't play a 20-year-old.

Bob Odenkirk

#57. An old guy with a Hemingway beard and the build of a girl.

Gillian Flynn

#58. Look, Orrin Hatch is not a bad guy. But he is an old guy, and he's a lifer politician.

Scott Howell

#59. I don't want to sound like the old guy, but cynicism is a potential danger. It colors our way of looking at the world.

Bob Newhart

#60. Cardinal Raymond Burke is a 66-year-old guy who lives in Rome, dresses like Queen Elizabeth, and talks like someone who majored in misogyny at some bogus, backwoods, Bible-banging tent school.

Mike Barnicle

#61. You don't even have a cat or a dog or anything?"
"You think I should?" George asks, a bit aggressive. The poor old guy doesn't have anything to love, he thinks Kenny is thinking.
"Hell, no! Didn't Baudelaire say they're liable to turn into demons and take over your life?

Christopher Isherwood

#62. I'm leaning on an old guy trick here, claiming my wife is being a typical irrational woman right as she begins saying things that I don't want to hear.

Matthew Norman

#63. -Hello, welcome to Wal-Mart.
Amanda lifted up her pink sunglasses to gape at the old guy in the requisite blue vest.
- Ohmigod, it's just like the commercial. If a smiling yellow dot bounces toward me, I'm going to freak out.

Erin McCarthy

#64. I'm that grumpy old guy yelling at all those pesky little Grizzly Bear fans to get offa my lawn.

Chuck Eddy

#65. The old guy behind the counter looked like he was doing about sixty, and it didn't look easy. Face was dark and chewed-up from something in his past. Hair was long and gray, and mostly behind him. He stared at me through two dark slits.

Richard Krauss

#66. They got drunk and high on a regular basis, but this is a vestige of youth that you either quit while you're young or you become an addict if you don't die.
If you are the Old Guy In The Punk House, move out. You have a substance abuse problem.

Bucky Sinister

#67. Wisdom isn't an old guy on top of a mountain in a loin cloth. It isn't an answer. It's a question.

Billy Connolly

#68. You're never too old for me to look out for you and to make sure that every guy knows that if he tries to screw you over, I will shoot him."
"Okay," I say, looking up at Asher. "If you screw me over, my dad will shoot you.

Aurora Rose Reynolds

#69. I was watching 'Up In The Air' and I thought, 'Jesus, who's the old gray-haired guy?' And it was me. I never wear makeup for movies and now it's starting to show.

George Clooney

#70. Observation #3: They gossip.
Can you believe it? I overheard Finn and Doug in the backyard talking about some girl named Dawn who blew off some guy named Simon for some other guy named Rick for like twenty minutes! They sounded like those old mole-hair ladies at Sal's Milshakes.

Kate Brian

#71. I changed his name after I saw this old movie at the Snark. It's called Nosferatu, and it's the original Dracula story. It's ten times as scary as the version you see on television. The guy who plays the vampire is really bizarre.

Daniel Pinkwater

#72. When I hear homestyle, I always think of some guy in his underwear standing next to a microwave. You want me to nuke a hot dog for ya? I got some old Chinese in the fridge, but I think it's my roommate's.

Jim Gaffigan

#73. I was the one that allegedly "quit and joined my old band." That wasn't true. But it was said so matter-of-factly on the Internet that the guys weren't really sure what I was up to.

Slash

#74. You get too old to lose. When you were a young guy, you bounced back from losses.

Bill Parcells

#75. I like you, Mark, and I hope you'll come see me again. You're a nice guy and you have an old soul. I hope we can be friends.

T.A. Webb

#76. I didn't get to hear the rest, as the skipper poked a red, peeling face out of the wheelhouse and told Billy Lee to get back to work or he wasn't getting paid. The guy looked to be a hundred years old and four feet tall, but when he opened his mouth, even I jumped.

Vincent H. O'Neil

#77. I put a flower in someone's locker when I was 15 years old. This girl, called Maria. Maybe I was 14. She actually thought it was from someone else, and the other guy claimed it as well, which was just great.

Robert Pattinson

#78. And it's not like I've never jacked off. I'm fifteen years old. Of course I do it. Any guy who says he doesn't is lying. That would be like having the coolest video game ever and never playing it. No one's that stupid.

Michael Thomas Ford

#79. It could be anything, give a homeless guy a sandwich, help an old lady across the street like anything to make this world a better place. If everybody just did one good thing for another person like a selfless good deed just think about how much a better place this would be.

Frank Iero

#80. I guess I'm the only guy old enough to figure him (Nolan Ryan, 1-Hitter Game in 1991) out.

Dave Winfield

#81. I had not learned anything about Huntley that would
have alerted me to what he was. I had no reason, as an 11-year-old girl, to be wary of him. No one said, 'This guy likes to have sex with young girls.

Stephen Richards

#82. The toughest nights when I was a young, unknown comedian were opening for these real old-time Italian singers. I'm like Grace Jones to them. "This guy is nuts-talking about socks. Where's the wife jokes, where's the fat jokes?"

Jerry Seinfeld

#83. Wow, Johnny. I send you out for reinforcements and you come back with an old man, a nerd and this little hobbit guy. Great job.

Pittacus Lore

#84. Do you wanna know the secret to picking the right guy? All you need to do is to find one that makes you laugh and keep him. I may be 72 years old, but, in my head, I'm still the same young madcap I was at 20, and my wife and I have been together for as long as I can remember!

Someone

#85. You know Becky, you haven't been the same since that crowbar fell on your head." - spoken by my mother after I eloped with a guy I'd known for about a month, when I was 18 years old!

Becky Lewellen Povich

#86. Some guy said to me: Don't you think you're too old to sing rock n' roll?
I said: You'd better check with Mick Jagger.

Cher

#87. I am an old geezer: a grandpa kind of a guy. I was born October 19, 1931. I have gray hair, a beard, and a little pot belly. I have two children who are over 30 years old and a sweet little granddaughter who is 11 years old.

Ed Emberley

#88. Kraut was a stand-up guy in the old tradition, in a strange way reminiscent of my father in his steadfast refusal to abandon a position once he had taken it. It was a quality I lacked, and so admired in others when they weren't using it to beat me to the canvas or break my heart.

Miles Watson

#89. I'm an old school guy and love the guys in the monster suits and JAWS; even though everyone makes fun of the shark I think it's awesome. You know it's fake, but with my generation that was part of the charm.

Larry Fessenden

#90. There's no such thing, of course, as an old-fashioned gay guy. They're the most decadent people.

Norm MacDonald

#91. (I'm sorry, but the guy breastfed until he was four. That's beyond being "old enough to ask for it" and practically into being "old enough to make your own breakfast.")

Dahlia Adler

#92. I listen to a lot of Tupac and Biggie Smalls. Old school songs. Rick Ross. I listen to a guy ASAP Rocky. I like different kinds of music. I always have. It motivates me before games ... A Tupac playlist or a Meek Mill playlist. It varies.

Trey Burke

#93. I stepped forward. Call me old-fashioned, but I wanted to keep his focus on me and not Annabeth. I think it's polite for a guy to protect his girlfriend from instant incineration.

Rick Riordan

#94. I believe in fate. Sometimes that means an old bearded guy sitting on a cloud and pulling the strings; sometimes it means random atoms swirling through a cheerless universe; sometimes it means everything being preordained thanks to your karma credit from your previous lives.

Kyle MacLachlan

#95. When little old ladies recognize a guy who was Mr. Olympia, that's saying something. That means I've been able to cross lines as far as marketability is concerned.

Lee Haney

#96. I hope I am allowed to say that the reason I am popular is because of the way I am, the way I race, and the way I talk. I am just the old-fashioned, reliable guy, and people always know I am after one thing: 'There is Jens. He will go in the breakaway.'

Jens Voigt

#97. I'm not a horror movie guy, but I think the guy that did Saw, or maybe House or something, he was saying you love that age as a storyteller because a nineteen-year-old is still dumb enough to make really bad decisions, but he's allowed to be out on his own.

Craig Finn

#98. I care about being able to play. If you're playing with integrity in the music, then that's what matters. But it wasn't that great for me because it was kinda like going back into the old times without the guy.

Bill Kreutzmann

#99. You can draw Family Guy when you're 10 years old. You don't have to get any better than that to become a professional cartoonist. The standards are extremely low.

John Kricfalusi

#100. Big story at the Olympics regarding Michael Phelps. He stepped out with his girlfriend for the first time. She is a 25-year-old model from Los Angeles. Like every other model in L.A., She's dating an older retired guy. What's going on?

Conan O'Brien