Top 100 Not My Fault Quotes
#1. Donald Trump is not my fault. You can blame certain things on me, but not Donald Trump.
Fran Lebowitz
#2. Don't call me when you're stuck in traffic. It's not my fault that radio sucks and did it ever occur to you that there wouldn't be so much traffic if people like you put down the phone and concentrated on the road ... besides I can't talk now, I'm in the car behind you trying to watch a DVD.
Bill Maher
#3. I became a poet at the age of sixteen. I did not intend to do it. It was not my fault.
Margaret Atwood
#5. That I am a foreigner is not my fault. I would rather have been born here.
Ernest Hemingway,
#6. It's not my fault the truth and I are strangers - we were never properly introduced.
Kresley Cole
#7. If you eat junk, you look like junk. People say, 'It's not my fault, it's my glands.' It's not; it's greed!
Joan Collins
#8. She fist bumped me, I say, pointing at Six. It's not my fault. She hates purses and she fist bumped me, then made me push her on the damn merry-go-round ... I'm into you because you're awesome. And because you let me accidentally touch your boob.
Colleen Hoover
#9. A couple of days back, I got into a car accident. Not my fault. Even if it's not your fault, the other person gets out of their car and looks at you like it's your fault: Why did you stop at a red light and let me hit you doing 80!
Dane Cook
#10. It's not my fault that people don't know me. I'm going to speak my mind, no matter what the consequences are.
Randy Moss
#12. I'm really very sorry, but it is not my fault. People are so annoying. All my pianists look exactly like poets, and all my poets look exactly like pianists
Oscar Wilde
#13. My parents' mistakes were not my fault, so I had no reason to hide them.
J.D. Vance
#14. A lot of lawyers are set to tell me that it's not my fault I like to eat.
Neil Cavuto
#16. You couldn't say: It's not my fault. You couldn't say: It's not my responsibility. You could say: I will deal with this. You didn't have to want to. But you had to do it.
Terry Pratchett
#17. She knows that it's not my fault if I don't know how many Zs there are in LOSER.
Lauren Child
#18. I said to the night, "If you are in love with the moon, it is because you never stay for long." The night turned to me and said, "It is not my fault. I never see the Sun, how can I know that love is endless?
Rumi
#19. If you remember your past too well you start blaming your present for it. Look what they did to me, that's what caused me to be like this, it's not my fault. Permit me to correct you: it probably is your fault. And kindly spare me the details.
Julian Barnes
#20. I hate idiots. There's a difference. It's not my fault a great majority of them in this world happen to be male.
Sara Wolf
#21. If the world runs out of chocolate today ... It was not my fault. :l
Demi Lovato
#22. And before you ask, no, you're not driving, Myrnin. I remember the last time.'
'That accident was not my fault.'
'You were the only one on the road, and the mailbox actually didn't leap out in front of you. No arguments. You sit in the back, too.
Rachel Caine
#23. Bones snorted. Why didn't it occur to them that they were doing something so appalling, if they were caught, they'd be executed on the spot? It's not my fault that vampires have a fairer form of punishment for rapists than humans do.
Jeaniene Frost
#24. I gave her a smile that I hoped conveyed something like: Hey, you know I'm on your side. Gods are such jerks! But what can you do?
Probably my expression actually conveyed: It's not my fault! Please do not kill me!
Rick Riordan
#26. What? It's not my fault I stab all the fanged people. They shouldn't look like Daimons. (Tabitha)
I didn't look like a Daimon, but you stabbed me. (Valerius)
Yeah, well, you looked like a lawyer so I had to kill you. It was a moral imperative. (Tabitha)
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#27. And it's not my fault that I have a penchant for good breeding, reasonable intelligence, and passable personal hygiene, not necessarily in that order.
Kami Garcia
#28. Oh. Well, as long as it's not my fault.
Mary Layton
#29. Meryn shrugged. "That's not my fault, I tried to indoctrinate you into the wonderful world of the gamer geek, but it's like you have some sort sci-fi/fantasy narcolepsy. It's weird. The second I try to show you something you fall asleep.
Alanea Alder
#30. I was just being honest and descriptive." "No, you were being an asshole." "It's not my fault they have to always be the same thing.
Paul Neilan
#31. It's not my fault you have the attention span of a gnat, capable of only thumbing through the crap on Facebook, instead of reading something of worth that can change your life. No, I'm not talking about Oprah's or Ellen's book either.
Dara Reidyr
#32. So, if you think I'm arrogant? Selfish? Spoiled? You're probably right. But don't hold it against me. It's not my fault. I am a product of how I was raised.
Emma Chase
#33. And I am a weapon of massive consumption
And it's not my fault, it's how I'm programmed to function.
Lily Allen
#34. This is not my fault! Any ideas?" "You don't have a white flag, do you?
Andy McDermott
#35. And I know this happens because I took economics, and I'd explain it to ya, but I flunked that course. Not my fault. They taught it at 8 o'clock in the morning. And there is absolutely nothing you can learn out of one bloodshot eye.
Lewis Black
#36. I created a weapon to defend the borders of my motherland. It's not my fault that it's being used where it shouldn't be. The politicians are more to blame for this.
Mikhail Kalashnikov
#37. After all, it's not my fault. I can't force myself to believe. If there is a God after all and he punishes me because I honestly don't believe in Him I can't help it.
W. Somerset Maugham
#38. The level of acting that I bring to films in three dimensions. I hope they make people sign some kind of waiver because if their mind explodes from my acting in 3D, it's not my fault.
Thomas Lennon
#39. I can't solve his problems, and it's not my fault that he thinks I should.
Lundy Bancroft
#40. Well, it's not MY fault you're such an AIRHEAD that if you open your mouth I can hear the ocean! I shot back.
Rachel Renee Russell
#41. Bella, it's not my fault if you are exceptionally unobservant.
Stephenie Meyer
#42. It's not my fault that there is this gap between rich and poor, it is the fault of governments. I want a different world. One where I don't wake up thinking I'm so lucky to be able to feed my daughter.
Emma Thompson
#43. It's not my fault being the biggest and the strongest. I don't even exercise!
Andre The Giant
#44. In the beginning, everybody that gets to work with me, thinks I'm nice. But three weeks later, they hear a bell ringing. Then they realise I meant everything I said during that first week. It's not my fault people are not taking me serious from the first moment.
Andrew Eldritch
#45. It is not my fault that certain so-called bohemian elements have found in my writings something to hang their peculiar beatnik theories on.
Jack Kerouac
#46. I'm not a Republican, but I was one once - when I was 7 years old. Not my fault. The symbol of the Republican Party is an elephant, I'm a Hindu - I was confused.
Hari Kondabolu
#47. I want to point out, that this is not my fault that everyone's afraid of me, because I did not kill a couple people the other day.
Aisha Tyler
#48. I couldn't help it," I said, knowing how lame that sounded. It was as bad as Angeline's "it's not my fault" mantra.
Richelle Mead
#50. I am addicted to reading, I will never reach the end of my TBR list because it multiplies all by itself. It is not my fault, I was born this way.
Lani
#51. Do not provoke me," I bite out. "I told you not to provoke me." "It's not my fault you can't control your temper," she snaps. Her
A. Zavarelli
#52. It's not my fault that Nicholas Sparks is an emotionally manipulative bastard who makes me feel things.
Staci Hart
#53. I hate motorcycles. Because if I hit one, even if it's not my fault, if I've done nothing wrong, I'm not charged with manslaughter, he's gonna die, because he's on a motorcycle. So I have to live my life knowing that I killed this guy.
Chuck Klosterman
#54. I, Kim Heechul, was born to successfully make women fall in love with me. It's not my fault. It's not of my own free will. My mother and father created this face.
Kim Heechul
#55. It's not my fault that my awesomeness intimidates people.
Jodi Picoult
#56. It's not my fault, that I'm flat chested and a midget!
Cassandra Clare
#57. If, for example, I had just as much love as you had virtue (and that is surely saying a lot) it is not astonishing that one should end at the same time as the other. It is not my fault.
Pierre-Ambroise Choderlos De Laclos
#58. Don't start that again. It's not my fault you don't have any masculine aprons."
"That's because aprons aren't masculine, genius."
"Don't make me have you for dinner, princess."
"Whatever, Betty Crocker. Knock yourself out.
Rachael Wade
#59. Here I am alive, and it's not my fault, so I have to try and get by as best I can without hurting anybody until death takes over.
Leo Tolstoy
#60. This claustrophobia was the only weakness I had. It's not my fault. It's just in my mind.
Felix Baumgartner
#62. It's not my fault if reality is Marxist
Che Guevara
#64. Well, it's not my fault that you can't manage your money.'
You threw away my purse.'
I thought it was an enemy.
Obert Skye
#65. It's not my fault that the gray of everyone else's stories makes the color stand out.
Kathy Hepinstall
#66. It's not my fault if the media and the public are more interested in Tiger Woods than in women farm workers.
Gloria Allred
#67. People who say, "it is not my fault," continuously fail. People who say, "I've done no wrong," have not done enough right. People who say, "I am done!" are never done repeating the cycle. Even in the privacy of our own thoughts, we can't sow lies and reap truth.
Katina Ferguson
#68. It's not my fault that it's illegal to marry multiple men at the same time; that's like saying that a gay couple isn't as serious as a straight couple because the straight couple is married, at the same time you make it impossible for the gay couple to marry.
Laurell K. Hamilton
#69. Radar threw his books into his locker and shut it. Then the din of conversation around us quieted just a bit as he turned his eyes toward the heavens and shouted, IT IS NOT MY FAULT THAT MY PARENTS OWN THE WORLD'S LARGEST COLLECTION OF BLACK SANTAS.
John Green
#70. Heaven knows that I have done all that a mortal could do, to save the people, and the failure was not my fault, but the fault of others.
Davy Crockett
#71. The world is the world, and we're cast in whatever roles we fall into. It's not my fault I was born wealthy any more than you were born poor.
J. Nelle Patrick
#72. Okay, rule number one: if you do not understand something, you need to stop me and tell me you don't understand. If I ask if you've got it and you say you've got it but you don't really have it, then it's not my fault that you haven't got it. Got it?
Jeff Erno
#73. Not my fault that you're distractingly pretty.
I have to take a minute to confirm to the pissed off part of my brain that still works that, yes, in fact, I did just say that. And I don't know if distractingly is even a word. If it is, it's a stupid one. Like me.
Katja Millay
#74. We didn't score any runs today. That's not my fault.
Danny Bautista
#75. It's not my fault that these are the problems I've been put on this earth to deal with, right? They're petty, they piss me off, and they're all mine
Megan McCafferty
#76. You guys make the rules up, so a foul is a foul. It doesn't matter if a guy is bigger and stronger. It's not my fault I ate my Frosted Flakes when I was little, and you ate Wheaties.
Shaquille O'Neal
#77. To be fair to Monica," I said, "what you did to her wasn't very nice either."
"What'd I do to her?" he asked, defensive.
"You know, going blind and everything."
"But that's not my fault," Isaac said.
"I'm not saying it was your fault. I'm saying it wasn't nice.
John Green
#79. It is very easy to see the allure of alcohol to dull the prain and the temptation to punish myself for something that is not my fault. But he sobering truth is that if I step onto the path of self-destruction, I know I will never come back.
Bill Jenkins
#80. Is she okay?"
"She's only been out for five minutes."
"It's been a long five minutes."
"Hey! You were out for a whole hour when you went through this. We had to wake you up with a bucket of water."
"Not my fault I have a low threshold for pain.
Sara Massa
#81. It's not my fault I can't be like you, okay? I don't get up in the morning thinking the world is one big, shiny, happy place, okay? That's just not how I work. I don't think I can be fixed.
Lauren Oliver
#82. It's not my fault who I am. The only think that's my fault is what I choose to do
Karen Marie Moning
#83. For the record," she continued, "it's not my fault I came in here looking like Chesty LaRue. You caught me on laundry day, so I have no undergarments on. Though I will cop to a little extra spring in my step for your benefit.
Kresley Cole
#84. The words It's not my fault! should never again come from your mouth. The words It's not my fault! have been symbolically written on the gravestones of unsuccessful people ever since Eve took her first bite of the apple.
Andy Andrews
#85. It's not my fault you left her all by herself,' Oliver teased. 'You know that's how Gwen gets into trouble.' 'I would stick my tongue out at you, but it's too cold,' I grumbled.
Jennifer Estep
#86. But I know nothing of time. I am new every day. I am born when I wake up in the morning, I grow old during the day, and I die at night when I go to sleep. It is not my fault. And I am doing so well today. I am doing so much better than I have ever done before.
Paul Auster
#87. I loved you, you know ... It's not my fault the world is what it is.
Ed Brubaker
#88. I told him Friday was a different religious occasion: Doctor Who. Hey, it's not my fault they don't have TiVo yet.
Libba Bray
#89. In this pause, I suddenly saw something very clearly.
Whatever it was I wanted from my mother was simply not there to be had. It was not her fault.
And it was therefore not my fault that I was unable to elicit it.
Alison Bechdel
#91. If I hadn't refused Ken Russell, Fellini and Spielberg and made their movies when they asked me, my life would be no different. It is not my fault that I accepted one movie and turned down another. I don't see any point in defending myself, either.
Klaus Kinski
#92. It's hard to accept that depression is an illness, that moping around from day to day with no will for so many years is not my fault.
Francisco X Stork
#93. All humanity inspires me. Every passer-by is my unconscious sitter; and as strange as it may seem, I really draw folk as I see them. Surely it is not my fault that they fall into certain lines and angles.
Aubrey Beardsley
#94. Don't be rude to the middle-agers," he says. "They didn't even have microwaves when they were young, and that's really, really sad." "Look, that's not my fault," I say, pointedly. "We lived without iPhone 6+. Sometimes life is hard.
Tarryn Fisher
#95. My dad was a different bloke to me and not very nice to my mum, although I never judge him. If you did, you'd become one of those people who is all-consumed by a fault in their past. And I haven't got the time for it.
Martin Clunes
#96. I spent your Wish on that doucheface," I said into his chest.
"Hazel Grace. No. I will grant you that you did spend my one and only Wish, but you did not spend it on him. You spent it on us.
John Green
#97. Is it my fault if I do not look like an English girl and I do not talk like a Nigerian? Well, who says an English girl must have skin as pale as the clouds that float across her summers? Who says a Nigerian girl must speak in fallen English ... ?
Chris Cleave
#98. Connor:I let her go. I could have held on but I let her go.
The Monster:And that is the truth.
Connor:I didn't mean it, though! I didn't mean to let her go! And now it's for real! Now she's going to die and it's my fault!
The Monster:And that is not the truth at all.
Patrick Ness
#99. For I hope my Friends will pardon me, when I declare, I know none of them without a Fault; and I should be sorry if I could imagine, I had any Friend who could not see mine. Forgiveness, of this Kind, we give and demand in Turn.
Henry Fielding
#100. What I prefer is an audience who listen. And are intelligent. Which I try and assume every audience is. And that if something goes wrong, it's generally my fault and not theirs.
Dylan Moran
