News For Quotes

#1. What was it like out there? Away from the city?"

"Quiet," Gib chuckled. "My neighbor once had a chicken lay an egg that hatched two chicks. That was big news for a year.

Shiriluna Nott

#2. A giant python was discovered in Florida. Spooky news for a state that derives half it's income from a giant mouse.

Dana Gould

#3. The FBI is urging all Americans to beware of any letters or packages that have badly misspelled words. Man, this is going to be terrible news for the rap industry.

Jay Leno

#4. Ideological warriors whether from the Left or the Right are bad news for the bench. They tend to make law, not interpret law. And that's not what any of us should want from our judges.

Chuck Schumer

#5. A limit on the automobile population of the United States would be the best of news for our cities. The end of automania would save open spaces, encourage wiser land use, and contribute greatly to ending suburban sprawl.

Stewart Udall

#6. For most folks, no news is good news; for the press, good news is not news.

Gloria Borger

#7. I tried for the longest time to find out what deconstructionism was. Nobody was able to explain it to me clearly. The best answer I got was from a writer, who said, 'Honey, it's bad news for you and me.

Margaret Atwood

#8. Mitt Romney says he believes in America and that he will restore American exceptionalism. I have news for him, we already have an exceptional American as president and we believe in Barack Obama.

John F. Kerry

#9. I got some news for you. One, there is no Jesus. Two, there is no God. Three, mind your own business and everything works out.

Ed Asner

#10. Not every programme dealing with issues of global significance has to be fronted by last week's winner of Have I Got News For You-but I suppose you might be wrong.

Jonathan Dimbleby

#11. Break my heart? Is that what you just said? I have news for you; you didn't break my heart. My heart's fine. My heart's in the best shape of its life. You know what you did to me? You took an AK-47 and blew my soul open.

Tiffanie DeBartolo

#12. So Aphrodite married Hephaestus and the celebrity ship Aphrophaestus completely dominated Olympian tabloid news for like a thousand years. Did they live happily ever after? HAHAHAHAHA. No.

Rick Riordan

#13. I've got news for you ... both those idiots [Al Snow and the Rock] aren't your friends! They hate you! Everybody hates you! All the people at home, all these people in the arena hate you, and most importantly, Y2J hates you!

Chris Jericho

#14. Yesterday, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he would run for governor of California. The announcement was good news for Florida residents who now live in the second flakiest state in the country.

Conan O'Brien

#15. Its only when you are a great actor and are recognised for your good work that you become famous. Unless you are in the news for the wrong reasons!

Christine Lahti

#16. Too much magic could wrap time and space around itself, and that wasn't good news for the kind of person who had grown used to things like effects following things like causes.

Terry Pratchett

#17. Other people's successes are good news - for them and for you. Good for you because they show you a way to go.

Steve Wynn

#18. I kicked Beaky Nose in the nuts with the toe of my shoe, very, very hard. I have big feet and my shoes have steel toes. This is never good news for the sorry son of a bitch whose balls get in the way of my rage issues.

Jonathan Maberry

#19. An ethics of desire is good news for those of us who have become allergic to an ethics of law.

Jean Vanier

#20. Mostly though, they waited. For the mail. For the news. For the bells. For breakfast and lunch and dinner. For one day to be over and the next day to begin.

Julie Otsuka

#21. It is incredible to me that my Twitter feed is a source of 'news' for every rock news outlet around the world.

Sebastian Bach

#22. Most of all, I dislike this idea nowadays that if you're a black person in America, then you must be called African-American. Listen, I've visited Africa, and I've got news for everyone: I'm not an African.

Whoopi Goldberg

#23. Today New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie announced that he's endorsing Mitt Romney for president. It's good news for Romney. I mean, you always want Chris Christie on your side. Unless you're in a canoe.

Jimmy Fallon

#24. Raising the minimum wage means raising the living wage - and that's good news for Ohio.

Sherrod Brown

#25. Rick Santorum beat Mitt Romney in three states on Tuesday. Got a huge amount of fundraising. That's the good news for Rick Santorum. The bad news: people are now Googling 'Santorum.'

Bill Maher

#26. Sjogren's is something you live with your whole life. The good news for me is now I know what's happening after spending years not knowing ... I feel like I can get better and move on.

Venus Williams

#27. The bad news for journalists today is that the media, however seriously people who are in the public eye take it, is not taken as seriously as it once was - by the public.

Alastair Campbell

#28. For those of you who thought F. W. Murnau's 'Nosferatu' was his greatest film, I have news for you: his 'Faust' blows it out of the water.

Kage Baker

#29. But if you find yourself experiencing a desire to seek God, we have great news for you: God is already at work in you.

Henry T. Blackaby

#30. You folks feeling the economic pinch? Are you a little fed up with the economic news? It's bad. The department stores, this holiday season, no Santa Claus. They're laying off department-store Santa Clauses. So more bad news for John McCain.

David Letterman

#31. That one can understand The Waste Land without even trying is consoling news for all students of literature.

Terry Eagleton

#32. People are so accustomed now to social networking. Now everybody has custom-made news for him or her. So everybody is a content maker and a content reactor.

Lucien Bourjeily

#33. You know, I was at CBS News for 28 years. I may have run an unidentified source. Frankly, I don't remember.

Bernard Goldberg

#34. Good news for senior citizens: Death is near!

George Carlin

#35. fond of people to stay in the field with the sheep. Well, I've got news for you about people, you big stupid

Jean Gill

#36. I've got news for you, Aves. When a guy says he wants to take you out in the name of science, he's totally full of it. He really just wants to take you out."
"But you've taken me out like a million times for the experiment. You kissed me once in the name of science."
"Exactly.

Kelly Oram

#37. Can the president really blame Fox News for his problems?

Don Lemon

#38. Good news for me, although even in Texas I don't think impersonating a maid would be classified as a crime.

Sue Grafton

#39. It is not the job for those who are angry about the events of the day to strike out and post things that they hope will incite anger in others as well. Do not sell your social media friends short as far as their ability to find the news for themselves.

John Patrick Hickey

#40. I've got news for you. We're gonna win the game. I guarantee it.

Joe Namath

#41. Even the few serious crimes that did occur received no particular attention in the news. For well-bred people do not, after all, care to read about the social gaffes of others.

Arthur C. Clarke

#42. Everything has gotten less expensive. Digitization has made content, whether it's print or music, less costly. Today, anyone can read the news for free online.

Hubert Burda

#43. That life has no clear purpose or meaning is the best possible news for artists.

Marty Rubin

#44. In our political system, money is power. And that means a few can have a lot more power than the rest. That's bad news for everyone else - and for our democracy itself.

Al Franken

#45. They called to tell me that I was going to be returning to RAW. I left immediately to run home and tell Jackie. She said, I have some news for you-I'm expecting.

Charlie Haas

#46. I have news for the forces of greed and the defenders of the status quo: your time has come - and gone. It's time for change in America.

William J. Clinton

#47. More bad news for the Taliban. Remember how they are promised 72 virgins when they die? Turns out that it's only one 72-year-old virgin.

Jay Leno

#48. The good news for Nigeria is that they're two-nil down very early in the game.

Kevin Keegan

#49. (Thinking while being interrogated by the Germans) You big shots think you can decide on my life, but I have news for you: you can't touch a hair on my head without the will of God my Father, because He is on my side.

Diet Eman

#50. Events in the early 1990s in New York City, Texas, and Florida appear to have raised, in the eyes of CBS News, for example, the question of whether religion as such is incompatible with good social order.

Harold O.J. Brown

#51. Federal authorities have informed Martha Stewart's lawyers she will be indicted for her role in the ImClone insider trading scandal. Good news for Martha - stripes are back in this year.

Craig Kilborn

#52. If we do have any iPhone users out there, I have incredibly great news for you. I've developed after about six months and finally perfected and it'll be out on the market soon, an app that you'll all want. It allows you to make a phone call.

Kevin Pollak

#53. I always say that when a country wins with such overwhelming might, it's bad news for that country.

Stephane Hessel

#54. Most of us can now record a whole series with the click of a button. We all have DVD players, and the rise of the DVD box-set means we watch this stuff in two, three-hour sessions. So there is this real appetite out there for lengthy, pretty intricate drama. All that is great news for writers.

Ted Danson

#55. Organized religion is no longer good news for most people, but bad news indeed. It set us up for the massive atheism, agnosticism, hedonism, and secularism we now see in almost all formerly Christian countries.

Richard Rohr

#56. In the business world, bad news is usually good news - for somebody else.

James Surowiecki

#57. Now it looks like I'll be known as the musical comedy guy. Which is good news for me. Or I'll be known as the New Zealand idiot.

Bret McKenzie

#58. And also forever too late for Lily to learn that raging passion predicts nothing but a mess of bad news for everybody.

Charles Frazier

#59. The elimination of the barbaric terrorist Abu Musab al-Zarqawi is good news for the world.

Spencer Bachus

#60. New Rule: If you're one of the one-in-three married women who say your pet is a better listener than your husband, you talk too much. And I have some bad news for you: Your dog's not listening, either; he's waiting for food to fall out of your mouth.

Bill Maher

#61. I've got news for you: There are going to be people other than Christians in the hereafter. What are you going to do about it? Are you not going to go?

Jane Elliot

#62. Great news for someone is always bad news for someone else

John Green

#63. People are reading news for free on the web, that's got to change.

Rupert Murdoch

#64. The anti-pleasure movement in self-discovery is very strong. I have big news for them, if they ever get to enlightenment, which is unlikely the way they're approaching it, they're going to find that enlightenment is very pleasurable.

Frederick Lenz

#65. Donald Trump is not running for president. This is devastating news for Trump's supporters - all of whom are late night comedians.

Conan O'Brien

#66. the Kamchatka Peninsula." "What do you say?" "We're betting if the man and the picture matched, neither was Kyle Donovan." Jake's eyes narrowed. "Bad news." "For Donovan, certainly. He probably got that chunk of Mother Russia they offered you. But bad for us? We don't know.

Elizabeth Lowell

#67. My being a psycho is actually good news for you in some ways. It means I am 100% practical and not encumbered by other considerations.
In fact maybe that is the simplest definition of a psycho; someone who is 100% practical. Yes, I like that.

Jake Remington

#68. Tough Olympic news for the Romneys. Ann Romney's horse Rafalka did not advance to the Olympic finals. Apparently it was beat by a smooth-talking socialist horse from Kenya.

Conan O'Brien

#69. Good evening and welcome to Have I Got News for You, the show that's done for Friday and Saturday nights what ten pints of lager does for Sunday mornings, although I wouldn't know, being more partial to cocaine personally. Allegedly.

Angus Deayton

#70. Good news for orange lovers: citrus fruit intake has been associated with reduced stroke risk.

Michael Greger

#71. I have amazing news for you. Man is not alone on this planet. He is part of a community, upon which he depends absolutely.

Daniel Quinn

#72. Every liberal in the country must watch Fox News for one year, and every conservative in the country must watch MSNBC for one year. (Middle-of-the-roaders could stick with CSI)

Stephen King

#73. I worked in cable news for a long time, but I'm not a pundit. I'm just not. I'm grateful to people that are, but I was really miserable trying to do that. I just wanted to be myself.

Meghan McCain

#74. The weekend brought good news for our friends in the cattle industry. At long last, Japan has taken the steps needed for American beef to make its way back into the Japanese market.

Randy Neugebauer

#75. Tell me I'm a sinner I got news for you
I spoke to God this morning and he don't like you!
Don't you try and teach me no original sin;
I don't need your pity for the shape I'm in

Ozzy Osbourne

#76. Libertarians believe that any government interference is bad. Anyone with a brain knows that climate change needs governmental leadership, and they can smell this is bad news for their philosophy. Their ideology is so strongly held that, remarkably, it's overcoming the facts.

Jeremy Grantham

#77. I mean, the idea that Bar could have sent him off on a Grand Tour. But he wasn't the least bit interested. Why? Why isn't he interested in the world? Because here's the bad news for him: He's in the world now.

Chris Matthews

#78. We shouldn't be surprised if this kind of stoicism is of no interest whatsoever to the news, for it has sound commercial incentives for overemphasizing our vulnerability.

Alain De Botton

#79. I always wanted to be an anchorman, but after college I wound up working behind the scenes at CBS News for 10 years.

Andy Cohen

#80. I've got some bad news for you, Larry. The sad truth is, I'd rather pull out my fingernails one by one than sleep with you." She slipped out of the low-slung car. "Your breath stinks, Lar, and let's just face it - you're a creep." She slammed the door with such force he winced visibly.

Christine Feehan

#81. You thought it was hard? If kindergarten is busting your ass, I got some bad news for you about the rest of life.

Justin Halpern

#82. Stop reading the news for a week; you will see that the world will turn from red to blue!

Mehmet Murat Ildan

#83. Yeah. She wants him back and has decided I'm in her way. But I have news for that little sleep-terrorist
it's going to take more than a couple of bad dreams to scare me off, so I hope she has something bigger up her sleeve.

Rachel Vincent

#84. Mitt Romney is not going to run for president. Mitt said it's time for fresh faces. So that's good news for Bruce Jenner.

David Letterman

#85. There's an awful lot of terrible television which I could do, but I mostly stick to Have I Got News for You.

Ian Hislop

#86. You're such an imbecile, you know that?"

"Yet, here you sit next to me trying to catch my attention with your legs. Is this your way of showing me what's on offer, because I have news for you, Chelsea, I ain't buying it. So what do you want?

Heidi McLaughlin

#87. People say karma is a bitch but I have news for you, karma doesn't have anything on fate when she is after blood. Not a single thing.

Harper Sloan

#88. I have news for you, there is no Superman (it's up to us.)

Tom Mboya

#89. Applying creative thinking to our clients' business strategy-this should be our industry's new core competency. And-in what is very good news for our industry-this kind of creativity, creativity that goes to the heart of business, is more in-demand than ever.

Bob Schmetterer

#90. Ann Landers said that you are addicted to sex if you have sex more than 3 times a day, and that you should seek professional help. I have news for Ann Landers: The only way I am going to get sex 3 times a day is if I seek professional help.

Jay Leno

#91. She seemed to Bond to give a quick involuntary shrug of the shoulders as she spoke, but then she leant impulsively towards him. 'I have some news for you from Mathis. He was longing to tell you himself. It's about the bomb. It's a fantastic story.

Ian Fleming

#92. To people I know in the bottom income brackets, living paycheck to paycheck, the Gig Economy has been old news for years. What's new is the way it's hit the demographic that used to assume that a college degree from an elite school was the passport to job security.

Tina Brown

#93. If you thought the army was here protecting people like yourself, I've some news for you, we're here to defend wealth.

Billy Bragg

#94. Work that mobilizes you 24 hours per day and makes you responsible to all of the people in the country is worth propelling yourself through jetlag and uncomfortable news for.

Dmitry Medvedev

#95. The joyful news for anyone who desires to be rid of the consequences of past poor choices is that the Lord sees weaknesses differently than He does rebellion. Whereas the Lord warns that unrepented rebellion will bring punishment, when the Lord speaks of weaknesses, it is always with mercy.

Richard G. Scott

#96. Advertising is a tax paid for being unremarkable.*" If that is true, then this tax is rising fast, which is good news for the government - not to mention production companies, media sellers, and agencies -

Joseph Jaffe

#97. If you want to have a career, my advice is don't get married. You think things have changed and there's some kind of gender equality now, that men are different, but I've got news for you. They're not.

Jeffrey Eugenides

#98. I understand the importance of political power, so I will use my strength and influence to convince as many people as I can within the party and outside the party that a Palestinian state is bad news for Israel.

Danny Danon

#99. A new presidential poll reveals that Democrats have the edge among voters under 30. The good news for Republicans is that there's only six people under 30 who actually vote.

Conan O'Brien

#100. Occasionally I'll watch Fox News for as long as I can tolerate it, or CNN. I'll watch until I get infuriated, but you got to know what they're talking about and what they're not talking about.

David Cross