Top 71 Anger Humor Quotes
#1. He curled his claw into a fist. "I'd like to shove a stake up that bastard's ass."
Adam's lip curled. "Remind me not to piss you off."
The demon raised his brow. "Trust that shit, mancy.
Jaye Wells
#2. Do you still want me to go to hell? I must admit, I don't know the way.
Robert Thier
#3. A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.
David Sedaris
#4. Humor is anger that was sent to finishing school.
Richard Peck
#5. Mixing defensiveness with anger - a wonderful mix, by the way.
Liza Palmer
#6. Fucking hell." He sighed dramatically. "I hate you, Beckstrom."
"Hold on to that," I said. "You know, because anger will get you there.
Devon Monk
#7. Let your repentance salt my shoe leather," I said presently, "and then, as I lately sheathed my blade of anger, so sheath you my blade of love.
John Barth
#8. Say 'provoking' again. Your mouth looks provocative when you do.
Becca Fitzpatrick
#9. I wish I was a rapper. There are certainly times when I wish I could just drop an album and channel all my ideas, anger, humor and energy into some music and be done with it.
Todd Boyd
#10. Fear and anger, Yoda had often warned him, were slaves to the dark side. Vaguely, Luke wondered which side curiosity served.
Timothy Zahn
#11. I'm not 17 anymore. I still have some of the same sort of anger, but I have a sense of humor about it ... a sense of being constructive with that anger.
Dave Pirner
#12. There are only two things to be done when a general is angry: One is to get behind the furniture and pretend one is not there; the other is to distract his mind.
Mary Roberts Rinehart
#13. If I say you're a goatherd's son, you say, 'Yes, Lord Ralon.'"
Alanna gasped with fury. "I'd as soon kiss a pig! Is that what you've been doing-kissing pigs? Or being kissed?
Tamora Pierce
#14. The man once wrote: Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger. Tolkien had that one mostly right.
I stepped forward, let the door bang closed, and snarled, Fuck subtle.
Jim Butcher
#15. All weather is sin-related. Lust causes thunder, anger causes fog, and you don't want to know what causes dew.
Stephen Colbert
#16. Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another person.
Chelsea Handler
#17. Premeditated anger is a bitch. Instead of saying, "Next time he does this, I will ... ", say, "Next time he does that, I will show him more patience and more love. That's premeditative love. She's much sexier!
Ace Antonio Hall
#18. I immediately went out and bought a book on anger management. And now I have that book, and I don't know if I'll get to the book. But I'm certainly excited about the day where I can't find the book, and I get to say, 'Where the hell is my anger management book?!'
Marc Maron
#19. No more humiliation for me, thanks very much. No more swallowing my anger. Honestly, I couldn't manage another mouthful. But it was delicious. Did you make it yourself?
Marian Keyes
#20. Oh that looked painful," called another Puck, a little farther down. "We really need to talk about your anger-management problems.
Julie Kagawa
#21. I know supposedly God has anger, vengeance, and wrath, and if he doesn't have a sense of humor I'm in big trouble!
Stanley Victor Paskavich
#22. The quickest way to defuse fear or insecurity or anger is usually humor. I think comics figure that out quickly, and, once you figure it out, you think, 'Hey, if I can do this and get paid, that would be kind of cool.'
Billy Gardell
#23. I find my anger ebbing away, and I'm lost in muffled grief again, this time not just for Tris, but for Uriah, whose smile is burned into my memory. My friend's brother, and then my friend, too, though not for long enough to let his humor work its way into me, not for long enough.
Veronica Roth
#24. You don't think that perhaps you have anger management issues?"
"Punching people is managing my anger.
Suzanne Wrightt
#25. I kept a straight face while my inner Neanderthal spluttered and then went on a mental rampage through a hypothetical produce section, knocking over shelves and spattering fruit everywhere in sheer frustration, screaming, 'JUST TELL ME WHOSE SKULL TO CRACK WITH MY CLUB, DAMMIT!
Jim Butcher
#27. If anger were mileage, I'd be a very frequent flyer, right up there in First Class.
Gina Barreca
#28. On the porch were the still-smoking remains of long-stemmed roses, evidence that someone angry and passive-aggressive didn't know Peter was out of town.
Theric Jepson
#29. I stood up in a flash and flushed a light shade of furious.
J.L. McCoy
#30. May the fleas of a thousand camels invade the crotch of the person that ruins your day. And may their arms be to short too scratch
Keisha Keenleyside
#31. I was amazed at how strong women were when they were angry.
Robin Hobb
#32. My wife, my daughters, even my grandchildren are funny. You've got to keep a sense of humor because anger destroys you.
Michael Caine
#33. We are not actually in charge of life, yet behave as if we are the masters of our own destiny. The realization of this fact is quite a hard one. The ridiculousness of our pomposity and presumption can only result in anger or humor.
Billy Childish
#34. A lot of my humor does come from anger. It's like, you're not gonna pull one over on me - which is pretty much my motto anyways.
Courteney Cox
#35. If everyone tried to see the humor in many things, I believe that there would be less anger in the world.
Rafaela Perales
#36. [Harrier] locked eyes with Zanattar. He couldn't remember another time in his life when he'd been this angry and hadn't hit something.
Mercedes Lackey
#37. To say I had some pent-up anger would be like saying Britney Spears had minor impulse-control issues.
Molly Harper
#38. It isn't often that Aunt Dahlia lets her angry passions rise, but when she does, strong men climb trees and pull them up after them.
P.G. Wodehouse
#39. Anger and humor are like the left and right arm. They complement each other. Anger empowers the poor to declare their uncompromising opposition to oppression, and humor prevents them from being consumed by their fury.
James H. Cone
#40. Irritatingly angry people have no sense of humor when wearing their "angry pants.
Cathy Burnham Martin
#41. For as long as wimmin have had the temerity to experience feelings of anger, sadness, frustration, and deep resentment, patriarchal society has denied them these feelings, and, in fact, punished them heartily for feeling anything at all.
Elisa Albert
#43. I tell you, I'm half tempted to break into CIA custody just so I can break Joe Solomon out of CIA custody just so I can break Joe Solomon
Ally Carter Only The Good Spy Young
#44. Did I miss the denial, anger, and bargaining phases, or did you leap straight to depression?
Kat Lowe
#45. There are as many kinds of anger as there are of the sunsets with which they ought to end.
George MacDonald
#46. Monique stood, arms akimbo, some six or seven paces away from Sophronia, and letting forth a scream of unadulterated anger, she hurled a cheese pie at Sophronia's head.
Gail Carriger
#47. ...the only thing that could justify your continuing existence on the planet would be if you started breathing carbon dioxide and exhaling oxygen.
Yrsa Sigurdardottir
#48. And then, anger gave way to pure and simple job satisfaction. I mean, when I looked at a dead zombie head on a spike, I thought, Hey, I did that. Picasso would have been proud. Especially how I rearranged that eye
Jesse Petersen
#49. Have you not love enough to bear with me, when that rash humor which my mother gave me makes me forgetful.
William Shakespeare
#50. Dr Adams was following my orders if you want to blame someone blame me -casius
oh i do,I'm just so pissed i had extra left over - Jace
D.D. Barant
#51. The German language is so sonorous, isn't it? Beautiful language ... the language of poetry. Angry, angry poetry.
John Oliver
#52. Inu-Yasha: Is it my imagination, or have you been a little prickly lately?
Sango: It's your imagination! GLARE KA-BOOM ROARRRR KRAKLE KRAKLE
Rumiko Takahashi
#53. Cody had said it was magic, and had told me not to ask any questions lest I anger the wee daemons inside who make the gloves work and our coffee taste good
Brandon Sanderson
#54. In Anger Management,' he said,'we had to do all this role-playing stuff. You know, to get used to handling things in a less volatile way.'
'You role-played,' I said, trying to picture this.
'I had to. It was court-ordered.
Sarah Dessen
#55. They-" He stopped and just blinked at me for a minute. "You know, people are always saying that you're cuckoo. Looney Tunes. Off the freaking edge. But I tell 'em, no, she's okay. She's got some ... anger management issues. But you know what? They're right. You're nuts.
Karen Chance
#56. Don't just get mad, try a little creative revenge ... Creative revenge ... allows you to get even - to extract some satisfactory justice - when you are wronged, but lets you do it with a sense of humor, not boiling malice.
Sonia Friedman
#57. But you know as well as I do that anger won't solve anything."
"I beg to differ," he shrugged. "Anger can be quite rewarding ... at least for those of us who have the option of blasting our enemies to oblivion.
M.A. George
#58. God picked me to be his punching bag ... so who am I suposed to pray to for mercy?
S.L.J. Shortt
#59. That man has some seriously oversized ovaries. Can you say PMS? He barked at anyone and everyone before shoving his way outside.
H.M. Ward
#60. Humor is almost always anger with its make-up on.
Stephen King
#61. Nothing frustrates people more than a cocky guy who's still winning.
Criss Jami
#62. The day the Dragon chooses a male virgin instead of a female as his yearly sacrifice, the entire kingdom erupts into mass protests and anger.
Mads Sukalikar
#64. If you don't make a few ememies now and then, you're a coward-or worse. Besides, it as worth it to see his reaction. Oh, he was angry!
- Angela to Eragon
Christopher Paolini
#65. My anger with him had grown as the hours had passed. I'd convinced myself when he came to get me i would really give him a piece of my mind. Of course - it's easy to be brave when the object of your fear isn't holding your sore nipples hostage. ~ Livvie
C.J. Roberts
#66. Hespe's mouth went firm. She didn't scowl exactly, but it looked like she was getting all the pieces of a scowl together in one place, just in case she needed them in a hurry.
Patrick Rothfuss
#68. All I do is have fun. When I'm not working, it's about making people laugh. I love making jokes about things. Even when someone's mad at me, I'll deflect anger with humor. My days are filled with laughter. If I'm not laughing, I'm not happy.
Drew Fuller
#69. Weak men are easily put out of humor. Oil freezes quicker than water.
Berthold Auerbach
#70. He learned...never to show his anger or hatred against a stronger adversary, for fear of being crushed.
Janvier Chouteu-Chando
#71. So let me get this straight. You were living in a tent in the woods, but now you're living with Prince Charming and anger management boy? SERIOUSLY?!
Natsuki Takaya
