Jesse Petersen Famous Quotes & Sayings

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Top 50 Jesse Petersen Quotes

#1. Balance the world in your relationship. No one person should be responsible for killing ALL the Zombies. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#2. Never go to bed angry. Terrified is okay. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#3. Be proactive; and ready to run if proactive backfires. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#4. Um, didn't Mythbusters once do an episode about how you couldn't use sheets as a way out of prison?" I laughed. "I don't remember if they busted it or not. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#5. Do fight unwinnable battles. Sometimes they're worth it. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#6. Strive for more. More zombies, more fighting, more profit. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#7. I stared at him. David, that's prison movies, not zombie movie. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#8. Don't forget the little people, even when you want to. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#9. Profits aren't everything. If you can get out with only your ass intact, that's pretty good too. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#10. Don't fear change. Just fear everything and everyone else. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#11. Fake it til you make it. Just make it. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#12. Yeah." Sven said. "The stuff she just said. Let's not get all killy. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#13. Do what you love and the zombies will follow. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#14. Fuck me, David! Dr. Kelly just tried to eat us! - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#15. I stopped as I thought of poor Jack on my bathroom floor, just another victim of Dr. Phil. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#16. You are your partner are on the same side - it's the side of the living. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#17. Share in your activities and interests. If you are going to kill zombies anyway, why not do it together? - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#18. Address one issue at a time.You can't load gasoline, pick up food, AND kill fifteen zombies at once - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#19. Building relationships is building business. Also, you sometimes need other people to kill all the motherfucking zombies. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#20. Show physical affection. Nothing says "I love you" like bearing the entirety of your spouse's weight. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#21. Put the small stuff into perspective. It's better to be wrong and alive than right but eating brains. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#22. Dress for success. Also arm yourself for it. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#23. The question: What color is my parachute?
The answer: blood red, brains gray, sludge black. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#24. Rich dad, poor zombie. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#25. Profits are everything; but to get them you have to catch a zombie. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#26. Support your partner in their interests. You never know when batting practice, kung fu movie moves, or even a poker night might come in handy during a zombie infestation. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#27. Talk openly about important issues like money, sex, and religion. They can affect your life and happiness a great deal. Especially when it comes to cults. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#28. I went all kung fu on his zombie ass. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#29. Strive for the 4 hour work week. The rest of the time run like hell. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#30. Expand. Why stick to just killing zombies? Or killing them just one way. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#31. Have you ever wanted to smash a car? Or break a television? Or maybe burn a big fire in the middle of a city square? If the answer is yes, then you'd have some fun during a zombie infestation. It's the little moments, you know? - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#32. And then, anger gave way to pure and simple job satisfaction. I mean, when I looked at a dead zombie head on a spike, I thought, Hey, I did that. Picasso would have been proud. Especially how I rearranged that eye - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#33. Admit when you're wrong. It doesn't fix a busted leg, of course, but it's a nice gesture none-the-less. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#34. Because I'm not really certain she'd make the best travel partner through a zombie-infested city, he hissed. She gets confused by Scrabble. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#35. Find creative ways to have fun together. Looting is really underrated. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#36. Present a united front: YOU against the zombies. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#37. I'd always thought the skinny little twerp was anorexic. But apparently what she needed wasn't a sandwich, as I'd often muttered as we left her office, but a manwich. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#38. Think win-win. You probably won't get it, but think it. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#39. Make requests, not demands. "Please" kill that zombie, honey, I'm out of bullets. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#40. Thank God for the second amendment. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#41. Don't discuss your relationship problems with friends. Your zombie problems are another story entirely. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#42. Partnerships don't last forever. The zombie apocalypse just might. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#43. Just because she tried to eat us doesn't mean she was wrong - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#44. Protect your brand - and your ass. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#45. Build mutual friendships. Just be ready to end them when your friends start trying to eat you. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#46. So you killed him with what now?"
"I tried that Dr. Phil book at first" ... "And I finished it off with the toilet seat. Just so you know, you left it up again. That drives me crazy. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#47. Give each other a compliment every day. Even when the undead attack, its nice to feel pretty. Or badass. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#48. I should have known that having "end of the world" sex wouldn't solve our problems. Though, it was pretty great and I highly recommend it. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#49. Men are from Mars. Zombies are from Hell. - Author: Jesse Petersen
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#50. Who moves my cheese? ...and my shotgun? - Author: Jesse Petersen
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