Top 100 Quotes About Dicks
#1. HEY, KIDS! TAKE YOUR DICKS OUT OF THE PLAYSTATION THREE FOR ONE GOD DAMN MINUTE AND READ SOME FUCKING COMICS.
James Kochalka
#2. Whoever said white men had little dicks was dead ass wrong.
Mz. Lady P
#3. If you can't draw a crowd, draw dicks on the wall
Ben Folds
#4. Males were expected to be ready to fuck any hole they could slip their dicks into. Boys weren't considered men unless they were influenced by their carnal instincts to spread their seed.
Maggie Young
#5. Sometimes men are pussies, and they need you to dangle yours in front of them to remember that they're all dicks.
K.A. Linde
#6. ou know chicks before dicks. Never choose a guy over a friend. It's one of the most important rules of feminism.
Rosalind Wiseman
#7. Your quick 'no' is because I refused to say 'yes' to sex. They say men think with their dicks. I hope you do not run Easton with your -
Avery Aster
#8. The man was great, but no man was great enough to sever a friendship between her and one of her girls. Chicks before dicks, and all that.
Katee Robert
#9. When we don't have dicks to distract us, we have the freedom to use our brain.
K.F. Breene
#10. Dicks don't have brains. It's why men get into trouble
Kylie Scott
#11. I think men don't realize women think dicks are beautiful. Not all dicks.
Karen Marie Moning
#12. Clever dicks will notice that the figure changes as the boat gets deeper or lighter because the area of the waterplane changes. You can go on enjoying arithmetic all night like this and never go sailing at all.
William R. Cooper
#13. How about those people who don't need sleep? What are they called again? Successful? What a bunch of dicks they are.
Jim Gaffigan
#14. Come on, you guys." Caraco leans back against the drying rack. "Can't you settle this some other way? Maybe you could just whip out a ruler and compare your dicks or something.
Peter Watts
#15. And that is the nature of us poets and whores, to make things hard: dicks, choices... life.
Nicole Lyons
#16. What was that you were saying about my mother?"
"She likes big dicks." Deacon slammed him hard in the gut, knocking him to the floor. "So does your wife.
Mercy Celeste
#17. It's post-traumatic stress disorder. When these women go ballistic and shoot their husbands or slice off their dicks, they aren't thinking about the consequences . . . just about stopping the aggression.
Jodi Picoult
#18. Shut up, Kelsey, and just give Lissa a chance," Chloe snapped.
Kelsey mocked surprise. "Oh my God, Chloe can speak? I thought her mouth only worked for sucking dicks. It's a miracle.
Kody Keplinger
#19. Tell this guy to eat a hundred-calorie pack of dicks.
Jenny Mollen
#20. Armchair hater, I wouldn't piss on your coffin
But when I see your picture I draw dicks on it.
Aesop Rock
#22. And even if Amina didn't yet know what it was to love like that, to burn until your spine has no choice but to try to wind itself around an empty shirt, she understood for sure that the people who said it was better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all were a bunch of dicks.
Mira Jacob
#23. Granted the dialogue is unrealistic and cringe-worthy and the dude is a crude alpha with a cock the size of a Subway sandwich, but hey, no one wants to read about pencil dicks either. The
Karina Halle
#24. I think Canada probably has an embargo on dicks." "That's why they're so nice. No dicks allowed.
Lauren Beukes
#25. Don't even think about a quickie," I warned him with a sharp shake of my head. "I couldn't come in this place even if you had two dicks."
He grinned. "That sounds like a challenge. You know that can be arranged.
Karina Halle
#26. Can we all just stop being dicks?!
Adam Hills
#27. There's going to be just a teeny bit of angst (this is a romance book) and then there's going to be a Happily Ever After. And, oh yes, dicks and butts, lots of dicks and butts. Seriously, keep a wet wipe handy, there's some really hot stuff in here.
Nick Pageant
#28. His saliva tasted like the wet dicks of ten thousand lonely truck drivers.
Chuck Palahniuk
#29. Our world needs brutality and cruelty to sustain its equality and justice. Without it, handsome guys and beautiful ladies will fuck everyone they want. And we all ugly people will wait holding our dicks in our hands.
M.F. Moonzajer
#30. I have done extensive research and, almost universally, found that the people who view my blurbs and observations as "anti-family" are dicks.
Jim Gaffigan
#31. you don't have the luxury of whipping out your dicks and seeing who's bigger
Alanea Alder
#32. She probably has a row of men's dicks nailed to her wall, like stuffed animal heads.
Margaret Atwood
#33. Ah!" said the troop horse. "That explains it. I can trust Dick." "You could put a whole regiment of Dicks on my back without making me feel any better. I
Rudyard Kipling
#34. I met Keith Haring at SVA college where he was having an art show, later we had a group art show at the Mud Club in NYC. Keith owed me $50, so he gave me a large framed canvas with barking dogs that had large dicks. I painted over Keith's painting to paint flowers for my mom's living room.
Steve Kaufman
#35. I'm all for you exploring new shit, but guys are dicks regardless of whether they wear a jock strap or a pocket protector." "That's a ringing endorsement of your gender.
Jen Frederick
#36. They touched me all over randomly and I loved it. It felt like they were aching to have me back on their dicks.
Amelia LeFay
#37. Ugh, why don't all men pierce their bloody dicks? I think it could bring about world peace. Like, seriously. Could you imagine all the satisfied, happy women wandering the earth after having sex with big, fat, pierced dicks? World peace, I tell ya.
Nina Levine
#38. I think these pipe-smokers oughta just move to the next level and go ahead and suck a dick. There's nothing wrong with suckin' dicks. Men do it, women do it; can't be all bad if everybody's doin' it. I say, Drop the pipe, and go to the dick! That's my advice. I'm here to help.
George Carlin
#39. Maybe we should just take out our dicks and see which is bigger?
Ginn Hale
#40. I know that sounds too earnest, but it's true. I mean, I would rather be a librarian, but I worry about the job security. Books may be temporary; dicks are forever.
George R R Martin
#41. He was an idiot, like all men who did more thinking with their dicks than actually putting them to their natural use.
Pepper Winters
#42. I would rather be a librarian, but I worry about the job security. Books may be temporary; dicks are forever. The
Gillian Flynn
#43. Do you dwell on everyone's junk when you meet them? Like, all you do all day long is think about dicks and janes? Is that your thing, Bailey? You can't stop thinking about what's in everyone's pants?
Brie Spangler
#44. I'm not judging you. If you want to take a break to look at tree dicks, we'll take one.
Ashlan Thomas
#45. Besides, this story, my story, is a lot more interesting than some dried up old Russians. Why? This story has dicks, lots and lots of dicks. Oh, so now you're interested? I should have put dick in the first line.
Nick Pageant
#48. As they walked into the living room, Trevor cleared his throat loudly. We're coming in. Hands where I can see them, dicks where I can't.
Katie Allen
#49. I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks.
Zach Galifianakis
#51. I can read the headlines now: 'Red's Goodie Basket has the Sweetest Pumpkin Spice Dicks Around!' I
Alexa Riley
#52. Hold onto your dicks."
"We don't all have dicks, dickhead," Kasyanov muttered.
Tim Lebbon
#53. There's only 2 reasons that you hate gay marriage;
1. You're dumb, or 2. You're secretly worried that dicks are delicious.
Joe Rogan
#54. We are our own wicked gods with little 'g's' and big dicks, sadistic and constantly inflicting a slow demise.
Marilyn Manson
#55. I'm more than happy to fuck off, but if it makes a difference, I wasn't going to talk about dicks. I'm far more interested to hear more about your poor neglected vagina. How's she been? We haven't had a face-to-face in a while.
Leisa Rayven
#57. The two men stared at each other. Assumptions were made, judgments rendered, dicks measured.
Jennifer Estep
#58. Ah, men losing the power in their dicks. When they can no longer f_ their women, they f_ the world.
Victor Robert Lee
#59. The two men eyed each other. Assessing strengths. Looking for weaknesses. Measuring dicks once again
Jennifer Estep
#60. I can't take a dick-measuring contest."
...
"I know Meshack has a big one. And from what I've felt, Zulu is big. Both of your dicks are equally big.
Kenya Wright
#61. Dicks didn't need to be inserted for it to be cheating.
Alice Clayton
#62. There are more than enough people with serious mental issues who really do need professional help without all the other Toms, Dicks and Harriets rushing to the therapist's couch.
Mariella Frostrup
#63. So many gay jokes tonight about (James) Franco. Apparently if you're clean, well dressed and mildly cultured, you're super gay now. Is that why the rest of you guys are so aggressively fat and dirty? You think if you read one book and take a shower, dicks are going to just fly into your face.
Aziz Ansari
#64. You should get those stretchy underpants all the gay porn stars are wearing these days and wear them instead of those blue Lycra-looking ones. They make all their dicks look huge."
"Because all their dicks are huge," I said. "They're called trophy briefs for a reason.
N.R. Walker
#65. I've signed dicks, asses, parole cards, a colostomy bag while it was still pumping. A couple of years ago, I signed a bloody Tampax. That's one you don't forget. I'm not asking for someone to top that!
John Waters
#66. God got it all wrong
Of who ought to be wearing dicks and balls
Karan Patade
#67. My folks wouldn't read a book if you put a gun to their dicks. but they read people all day long and always get it right.
Pat Conroy
#68. I love long walks on the beach, big dicks and fried chicken.
Jujubee
#69. We came here to pick up chicks, not talk about dicks.
J. B. Smoove
#70. The boys quiet until Ben looks across the table at Chon, holds his thumb and index finger a millimeter apart, and says, "We're that close to being gay."
They laugh for half an hour.
Collective dicks
Don Winslow
#71. For a second, Americans could still feel like big swinging dicks. Solidarity, baby.
Paolo Bacigalupi
#72. Always remember, darling girl, men love the pussy and their dicks are always fiending for attention. If you're not around to give it to them, they'll get it somewhere else and the novelty of new lips and a new cunt might shock them so much they'll think they're in love.
Katie Ayres
#73. Now that we've compared the equivalent of our supernatural dicks, why don't you answer my question?
Jeaniene Frost
#74. Women don't have dicks and they don't want dicks. That amateur psychology crap that women want penises. And they certainly don't want testicles. Because you know no women in her right mind is going to carry around a bag that she can't put stuff in.
Bobby Slayton
#75. Because they're your family - you don't expect that shit from family. But the fact is that, first and foremost, they're people, and people can be dicks.
Suzanne Wright
#76. Can we all say 'yay, we waved our dicks around,' and eat our damn dinner already?"
"I think I like your sister," I murmured.
"Don't worry, she doesn't like you," Shelby murmured back.
Seanan McGuire
#77. Do you know the problems with dicks? They're attached to bigger dicks.
Lexi Blake
#78. And if this is anyone's fault," she continued. "It's mine for bringing an innocent little girl around a criminal motorcycle club full of self-important assholes who think with their dicks and their guns instead of their brains!
Madeline Sheehan
#79. Nobody else can be alive for you; nor can you be alive for anyone else. Toms can be Dicks and Dicks can be Harrys, but none of them can ever be you.
E. E. Cummings
#80. Another question that would go unanswered in his lifetime was how good women got hooked up with dicks all the time.
Kristen Ashley
#81. I bet if cancer of the penis was more prevalent there'd be a cure for this fucker. I bet if dicks were being amputated or dropping off left, right and centre there'd have been a cure decades ago. There'd be a whole fucking government dick department dedicated to it.
Amy Andrews
#83. Lucifer. You're my brother, and I love you. But sometimes, You're just a great big bag of dicks.
Gabriel
#85. Train that bitch to love you, a bitch like that, she's the type you have to train, and even then, she'll still try to fuck around on you and test the boundaries, unless you have something no other man has, but to her you're a dick, and her she likes big dicks and muscular men, I can tell.
Stephen Demone
#86. Being different was about something more than just our dicks.
Paul Monette
#87. Men are like vibrators. Just because they're dicks, it doesn't mean you can't use them to have a good time.
Leisa Rayven
#90. After all, if God had wanted men to fuck other men, he'd have given them dicks and shoved a G-spot up their assholes!
Nathan Burgoine
#91. I can't bail out on Cary," I said apologetically, turning to face him. "Chicks before dicks and all that.
Sylvia Day
#92. I shouldn't have let you go. I should've said something yesterday, but it was intense for me, too, and you scared me, Cody. You scare me a lot."
"That's because you're a city dick," I reply. "City dicks are always scared."
"So I've been told."
"Well, you scare me, too", I say.
Gayle Forman
#93. Brothers think I'm dissing, but I'm really on the dicks
Look into my album, kid, you'll see all the flicks
Dres
#94. My voice mail message says I work nights and sleep days. Everyone who knows me, knows this. And still, people who aren't employed at the Nursing Office feel compelled to call me before three P.M. Certain people feel compelled to call me repeatedly, until I pick up - namely, dicks.
Cassie Alexander
#95. Despite their common reputation as agents of God's will, forces of good, and the gold standard for morality, all the angels Dean had met over the last year had been shifty, manipulative dicks. Except Cas, of course.
Rebecca Dessertine
#96. Take care of it," he demanded of Shanti over his shoulder. "We don't need a bunch of dicks wagging around this city."
"You already have a bunch of dicks wagging around the city," Shanti yelled back. "They're the ones barking orders.
K.F. Breene
#97. All erect dicks are bent. Or, if not all, then at least enough of them to be eulogized in a poem.
Karl Ove Knausgard
#98. You know why doctors slap babies on the bottom when they're born? So the dicks fall off the smart ones."
He laughed. "You know why women don't have dicks? So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink.
Barbara Elsborg
#99. Chicks before dicks, and all that.
Sylvia Day
#100. Over 30 years ago, Airbus was founded by a European consortium of French, German, and later Spanish and British companies to compete in the large commercial aircraft industry with U.S. companies.
Norm Dicks
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