Top 100 Intelligence Humor Quotes
#1. Reading Claire Cooks novel is like eating some exotic dish about which you say, Wow, this is great! Whats in it? The ingredients here are: intelligence, humor, poignancy, revelation and, perhaps best of all, true originality. Ready to Fall seems to me to be ready to soar.
Elizabeth Berg
#2. Wit penetrates; humor envelops. Wit is a function of verbal intelligence; humor is imagination operating on good nature.
Peggy Noonan
#3. My intellect tells me read between the lines.. No need to humor something that is what it is and is not what it was.
Phil Thersby
#4. He was one of those people with lots of intelligence but no brains
Joseph Heller
#5. The funny thing was that he wasn't altogether a fool in other ways. Deep down in him there was a kind of stratum of sense. I had known him, once or twice, show an almost human intelligence. But to reach that stratum, mind you, you needed dynamite.
P.G. Wodehouse
#6. It isn't as simple as a fascination of the flesh. It's everything about her that I love: her intelligence, her ambition, her talent, her sense of humor, her dependability, her kindness.
Kristen Zimmer
#7. The child probably overheard their voices; for, looking up to the window, with a bright, but naughty smile of mirth and intelligence, she threw one of the prickly burrs at the Reverend Mr. Dimmesdale. The sensitive clergyman shrunk, with nervous dread, from the light missile.
Nathaniel Hawthorne
#8. I love a sense of humor, I love intelligence, I love specificity, I love surprises. I'm inspired to get out of bed in the morning and fill my day with good things.
Michael Stuhlbarg
#9. That's what I meant,' said Pippin. 'We hobbits ought to stick together, and we will. I shall go, unless they chain me up. There must be someone with intelligence in the party.
J.R.R. Tolkien
#10. The desert is an unpredictable place. One day you're sweating, the next you're freezing. One moment the air is damp and cloudy like when the tide is coming in, the next the entire world is orange and dusty. The desert must be a woman.
Dianna Skowera
#11. Anyone looking at you would write you off as a brainless nincompoop with about as much intelligence as a dead rabbit.
P.G. Wodehouse
#12. Rachel delivered it like an official pronouncement. Like she was one of the fairies gifting Sleeping Beauty's christening: Beauty. Intelligence. Heterosexual.
Josh Lanyon
#13. I couldn't claim that I was smarter than sixty-five other guys
but the average of sixty-five other guys, certainly!
Richard Feynman
#14. Life is all about exploring yourself, discovering yourself and grooming yourself, then you will surely stop negative thinking.
Ehabib
#15. She needed to say something sexy and romantic with a mere hint of her vast intelligence. Something that would entice him into bed.
But what came out was, "I wanna fuck."
-Miki Kendrick
Shelly Laurenston
#16. When the Constitution declares that 'all men are created equal,' it is not referring to intelligence, good looks, good humor, height, weight, or income. It is talking about certain rights, 'inalienable', in that they cannot be taken away.
Elisabeth Elliot
#17. I think a man's "wordplay" can be so fucking sexy!!! I love a good mind fuck!!
Junnita Jackson
#18. I think that villains who are just brawn, muscles and weapons are boring. So I always try to find intelligence in my villains and also a sense of humor whenever that is possible.
Renny Harlin
#20. He had just about enough intelligence to open his mouth when he wanted to eat, but certainly no more.
P.G. Wodehouse
#21. I gave up on being Nice. I started putting more value on other qualities instead: passion, bravery, intelligence, practicality, humor, patience, fairness, sensitivity. Those
Anna Kendrick
#22. Ian was the kind of smart that makes your straight A student look like she'd drown in a wet paper bag. Ian was the kind of smart that scares people.
Matt K. Turner
#23. Sense of humor: A thread of illuminated intelligence that links two opposite ideas.
Thomas Lansing Masson
#24. Wealth and intelligence should not be categorized as relatives.
K.R. Royal
#25. Intelligence is the capacity to know what we are doing and instinct is just instinct. The results are about the same.
Will Cuppy
#26. The general plot of life is sometimes shaped by the different ways genuine intelligence combines with equally genuine ignorance.
Lucy Grealy
#27. Ka was the essence of teh person: spirit, intelligence, feelings and passions, humor, grudges, annoying television theme songs, all the things that make a person a person and not a nematode.
Mary Roach
#28. Intelligence is being intelligent enough to know you're not so intelligent as you intelligently once thought.
Carroll Bryant
#29. How much intelligence does it take to sneak up on a leaf?
Larry Niven
#30. I've never met a person who has more integrity than my husband. I respect that. There's his humor and intelligence, too, and he's really cute, all those things - but if you don't respect your partner, you'll get sick of him.
Michelle Pfeiffer
#31. I disapprove of matrimony as a matter of principle ... Why should any independent, intelligent female choose to subject herself to the whims and tyrannies of a husband? I assure you, I have yet to meet a man as sensible as myself! (Amelia Peabody)
Elizabeth Peters
#32. An opinion should be the result of thought, not a substitute for it.
Jef Mallett
#35. Aubrey Davenport was dressed like a fop, had the manners of a fop, and appeared to have the intelligence of a potato.
Marion Chesney
#36. I visualized myself pulling on my mental thinking cap, jamming it down around my ears as I had taught myself to do. It was a tall, conical wizard's model, covered with chemical equations and formulae: a cornucopia of ideas.
Alan Bradley
#37. Secret 7591.42.21. Avoiding weasel words in your intelligence analysis isn't easy when your intelligence analysis is about weasels.
The Covert Comic
#39. I wasn't talkative - I simply had too much intelligence up in my head that I always had a brilliant idea to share with everyone at all times.
Nick Nwaogu
#40. One will abide, and will confess that another is nobler than he, that another is richer, more handsome, and even that he is more learned, but that another is richer in reason scarcely any will confess: Rare is he who will concede genius.
Juana Ines De La Cruz
#41. We all make mistakes, but intelligence enables us to do it on purpose.
Will Cuppy
#42. Were it that intelligence, skill, or quality were prime determinants of success, I might have an easier time of it.
F.F. White
#43. I've always chosen my band members based on their sense of humor. It might sound stupid, but it means not only are they fun to live with on a tour bus for years, but humor implies intelligence.
Kristin Hersh
#44. Maple thought optimistically that human beings, on their good days, weren't much dimmer than sheep. Or at least, not much dimmer than dim sheep.
Leonie Swann
#45. Well there's these things called books.... They are like TV for smart people.
Robert Redford
#47. If someone is genuine, compassionate and kind, that is a turn-on. A sense of humor is a huge turn on, and that goes hand in hand with intelligence.
Jennifer Nettles
#48. The more women sit down and write something in a woman's voice for a woman, they more you'll see women in comedy because gender doesn't define sense of humor. Imagination and intelligence and perspective do.
Kristen Schaal
#49. Like a lot of stupid people, it took a great deal to get an idea into the king's head, but once there, there was no shifting it.
Richard Killeen
#50. Thinking is good for your mind, but too much thinking leads to distraction.
Ehabib
#51. He turned to Miss Minerva. "I'm relying on you, at any rate. You've got a good mind. Anybody can see that."
"Thank you," she said.
"As good as a man's," he added.
"Oh, now you've spoiled it!
Earl Derr Biggers
#52. Contemporary poetry is a kind of Reykjavik, a place where accessibility and intelligence have been fighting a Cold War by proxy for the last half-century.
Nick Hornby
#53. I noticed at once that Depp had a dangerously energized intelligence ... He was a suave little brute, but he had a wicked sense of humor and a rare instinct for escalation.
Hunter S. Thompson
#54. Come! Come sit by me. It's a nice bench. Nice and lovely on the butt."
"You're drunk."
"Yeah, and you're ugly, but do I complain about it? No! Because I don't complain about things that I can't change. That's called intelligence.
Sara Wolf
#55. The inhabitants of the earth are of two sorts: those with brains, but no religion, and those with religion, but no brains.
Al-Ma'arri
#56. Piers took a leisurely look at Linnet. There was the beauty, sure enough. But it didn't detract from the intelligence in her eyes. And in his opinion the slightly cynical lilt in her voice just made her all the more beautiful, as if Aphrodite had been crossed with Athena.
Eloisa James
#57. Bones has always been smart," I muttered. "His intelligence was just camouflaged under a mountain of p**sy."
Cat
Jeaniene Frost
#58. The Beatles did everything with down-to-earth humor, honesty, optimism, style, charisma, irreverence, intelligence, and a particularly spiky disdain for falseness.
Mark Lewisohn
#59. He is some brainless, beautiful creature, who should always be here in winter when we have no flowers to look at, and always here in the summer when we want something to chill our intelligence.
Oscar Wilde
#60. Beware the humorless. People who are all too serious are missing a key aspect of intelligence, which is perspective!
Catherine Carrigan
#61. Intelligence is not found when you have a plan, rather it's measured when you have no clue what you're doing.
Charlie 'Gale'
#62. Ramona chuckled as she picked up her basket and pruning shears. "You, my dear, are wasted out here where no one but the servants are subject to your wry humor and intelligence." I grinned.
L.R. Olson
#63. In relationships with a directors, I want to be able to give and take, and I can't name what it is: respect, energy, investment in the task, focus, humor, intelligence, but I always feel responsible for taking the money.
Harrison Ford
#64. Everything is possible in America, except the production of intelligence.
Mie Hansson
#66. On April 3, 2014, Jane Goodall turned 80. The iconic blond ponytail has gone gray, but the sparkle of intelligence, sly humor, and fierce dedication still shines from her hazel eyes.
David Quammen
#67. Do go on,' he said. 'There's nothing I enjoy more than listening to a highly trained intelligence leapfrogging common sense and coming to the wrong conclusions. It gives me renewed faith in parliamentary democracy.
Tom Sharpe
#68. Intelligence is the ability to avoid doing work, yet getting the work done.
Linus Torvalds
#69. It is a damn poor mind that can think of only one way to spell a word.
Andrew Jackson
#70. Alternatively, anyone who favors Intelligent Design in lieu of evolution might pause to wonder why God devoted so much of His intelligence to designing malarial parasites.
David Quammen
#71. Yes, and had your hotel proved slightly less psychotic, matters would never have got as far out of hand as they have.
Richard K. Morgan
#72. There is no one who has ever created music with the combination of intelligence, intuition, depth, creativity, and humor that Jerry Garcia has. His work and life will continue to be a limitless source of inspiration for all of us.
Bruce Hornsby
#73. Alfred," Merryweather said. "OIPEP is the only organization of its kind in the world, with practically unlimited resources and an intelligence network that spans every country in the planet. We shall do what any powerful, multinational bureaucracy would do in such a crisis. We shall hold a meeting!
Rick Yancey
#74. It was rather too late in the day to set about being simple-minded and ignorant.
Jane Austen
#75. The main characteristics of effective leadership are intelligence, integrity or loyalty, mystique, humor, discipline, courage, self sufficieny and confidence.
James Fisher
#76. There are times when I love to play all kinds of complicated games in painting. But this is one case when I need to be fairly straightforward. I'll just try to paint the man, his intelligence, his amiability and his stature, maybe paint him fairly close to humor and try to get it just right.
Nelson Shanks
#77. You are a perfect woman, a magical blend of beauty, intelligence, and spirit. Without you, my life is nothing.
Lois Greiman
#78. All this talk about artificial intelligence is really just hype, it will take at least fifty years before we have to let them vote.
Kenneth E. Boulding
#79. Look, I've got nothing against brains. Some of my best friends have them.
Stephen Colbert
#80. I find intelligence sexy. I find a sense of humor sexy. I find sensitivity sexy.
Nicole Appleton
#81. You know we armed Iraq. I wondered about that too, you know during the Persian Gulf war those intelligence reports would come out: "Iraq: incredible weapons - incredible weapons." How do you know that? "Uh, well ... we looked at the receipts."
Bill Hicks
#83. You are slow for a machine. Are you a Trash-80?
Keith Caserta
#84. In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
Ambrose Bierce
#85. He devoted a considerable amount of his acute intelligence to the cause of doing as little as possible.
James Herriot
#86. I am often thought of as being remarkably bright, and yet my brains, more often than not, are busily devising new and interesting ways of bringing my enemies to sudden, gagging, writhing, agonizing death.
Alan Bradley
#87. Skill is successfully walking a tightrope over Niagara Falls. Intelligence is not trying.
Marilyn Vos Savant
#88. The general intellectual level of South Florida is somewhere just above "functionally retarded".
Tucker Max
#89. And thanks to Christina McMullen, who has taught me that common sense and intelligence need not have any correlation whatsoever.
Lois Greiman
#90. I am attracted to intelligence, a witty sense of humor, an adventurous outlook on life and spiritual awareness about one's self and the world.
Tanit Phoenix
#91. Clever is when one is crafty enough to mistake your imagination for intelligence. Smart is when one assumes they are too educated to notice the difference.
Kerry E. Wagner
#92. Um. Ways in which a sentence beginning with the word "missiles" could be a good thing... Nope. I got nuthin'.
Dennis E. Taylor
#93. And it's not my fault that I have a penchant for good breeding, reasonable intelligence, and passable personal hygiene, not necessarily in that order.
Kami Garcia
#94. Theology, philosophy, metaphysics, and quantum physics are merely ways for God to have his smart people believe in him
Jeremy Aldana
#95. This book is written with an open mind and it should be read with the same
Adrian Sandvaer
#96. I value each woman for what she has to offer whether it be charm-beauty-wit-intelligence or humor but warmth is the quality I value most.
Marlon Brando
#97. It did not seem possible, much as he craved the comfort of a woman of intelligence, of humor and balance and perception.
Julie Powell
#98. Dicky was intelligent but he ended up selling tea because he was socially retarded.
Johnny B. Truant
#99. I have always been much cleverer in retrospect.
Jaida Jones
#100. I believe that singing is the key to long life, a good figure, a stable temperament, increased intelligence, new friends, super self-confidence, heightened sexual attractiveness, and a better sense of humor.
Brian Eno
