Top 46 Funny But Dirty Sayings

#1. People wince when something is in bad taste. They laugh when it's funny. If it's too dirty or wrong, they won't laugh. But if it's a big, dirty, smart, funny laugh, they love it.

Michael Patrick King

Funny But Dirty Sayings #21082
#2. Every time you strip my sword, I owe you a kiss. How's that sound?" I bit my lip to keep from giggling.
"That sounds really dirty."
Patch waggled his brows. "Look whose mind just rolled into the gutter.

Becca Fitzpatrick

Funny But Dirty Sayings #70213
#3. When you're doing comedy, it is so subjective. What is funny to you is not funny to another person. What is dirty to you is not dirty to the other person. Comedy is one of those things you throw against the wall and see what sticks.

Larry The Cable Guy

Funny But Dirty Sayings #85336
#4. The clock struck eleven and cat the vampire huntress was on the loose, except my battle armor was a push-up bra, curled hair, and a short dress. Yeah, it was a dirty job, but I was going to do it. Come one, come all, bloodsuckers! Bar's open!

Jeaniene Frost

Funny But Dirty Sayings #128469
#5. I love nothing better than a dirty cartoon. I think that it's really, really funny to see adult themes in a genre that's usually directed towards children.

John DiMaggio

Funny But Dirty Sayings #157254
#6. Well people love to go dirty and stuff like that. It's funny, because even really dirty things can kind of inspire, but all things inspire really dirty improv and monologues. So then really dirty things can inspire the exact opposite. It's kind of a crapshoot.

Amy Poehler

Funny But Dirty Sayings #207576
#7. I don't hate humanity and I'm not interested in people who do. Although, it's funny, actually, some of my favorite writers really do. Like Martin Amis. My dirty secret. 'London Fields' is one of my favorite books ever. And it's indefensible! But he's so funny ... I forgive him everything.

Elizabeth Gilbert

Funny But Dirty Sayings #231695
#8. I don't really need to be dirty to be funny.

Jimmy Kimmel

Funny But Dirty Sayings #239068
#9. My only relationship policy is, don't bring your dirty laundry to work, no sex on company furniture and don't let it affect your work.

Paula Graves

Funny But Dirty Sayings #284819
#10. 'Dirty Rotten Scoundrels' is a good one because it not only turned out, I think, to be a really funny movie but it was also a delight to shoot. We were in the South of France, working with Glenne Headly and Michael Caine and Frank Oz the director - who were just fun.

Steve Martin

Funny But Dirty Sayings #326056
#11. The [Five Second Rule] has many variations, including The Three Second Rule, The Seven Second Rule, and the extremely handy and versatile The However Long It Takes Me to Pick Up This Food Rule.

Neil Pasricha

Funny But Dirty Sayings #357904
#12. Jenna, standing in the doorway with her mouth and hand full of shelled pistachios, says, 'Real' is a dirty word in this place'.

Lauren DeStefano

Funny But Dirty Sayings #417388
#13. Have you seen the bologna that has the olives in it? Who's that for? 'I like my bologna like a martini. With an olive.' 'I'll have the bologna sandwich - dirty.'

Jim Gaffigan

Funny But Dirty Sayings #425365
#14. Bedsprings creaking, headboard banging, heavy breathing in triplicate (the bedroom sounds like a convention of asthmatic dirty phone callers have gathered there)

Gillibran Brown

Funny But Dirty Sayings #475412
#15. If I think of a joke that's really dirty and I think it's funny I'll try it but what I've found over the years is they just don't laugh. It doesn't work coming out of my mouth so it's like they taught me 'don't do that. Don't go that way or you'll lose me.'

Demetri Martin

Funny But Dirty Sayings #494663
#16. It's funny; it's a real balancing act. In TV, everybody's talking about authenticity. In order to make 'Dirty Jobs' authentic, I really can't be overly informed. The minute I am, I become a host ... It's a very tricky business paying a tribute to work, because TV is very bad at it.

Mike Rowe

Funny But Dirty Sayings #594513
#17. He laughed, a big, open-mouthed laugh that made her think of words beginning with the letter O.

Kerrigan Bane

Funny But Dirty Sayings #604410
#18. Get off me you dirty turnip!" "Dirty turnip? well, pardon me Signor Cabbage-Head!

Elle Newmark

Funny But Dirty Sayings #623873
#19. I think he fucked me stupid- McKenzie Matthews- Being Beckett's

P.S. Berryman

Funny But Dirty Sayings #633483
#20. The funny thing is that everyone thinks I'm naturally dark because all of my siblings are, but I'm naturally dirty blond.

Khloe Kardashian

Funny But Dirty Sayings #737052
#21. She began to curl her hair and long for balls

Jane Austen

Funny But Dirty Sayings #739436
#22. But there's a juicy artery in your groin," he said after a pause to regroup, his voice as slithery as a snake on a slide.
"Don't you talk dirty," I told him. "I won't listen to that.

Charlaine Harris

Funny But Dirty Sayings #818672
#23. It's not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Marilyn Monroe

Funny But Dirty Sayings #819265
#24. Your ... Your aura. It's ... amazing. It's shining. I mean, it always shines, but today ... Well I've never seen anything like it. I didn't expect that after everything that happened.'
I shifted around uncomfortably. If I lit up around Dimitri normally, what on earth happened to my aura post-sex?

Richelle Mead

Funny But Dirty Sayings #822621
#25. I have never pretended to be any kind of super-religious kind of man, but I feel very strongly that you can be funny without being dirty.

Jonathan Winters

Funny But Dirty Sayings #843729
#26. Well, I mean, if a joke or humor is bawdy, it's got to be funny enough to warrant it. You can't just have it bawdy or dirty just for the sake of being that - it's got to be funny.

Betty White

Funny But Dirty Sayings #882445
#27. My humor is so dirty I could masturbate to it.

Aleksandra Ninkovic

Funny But Dirty Sayings #914688
#28. It was a JOB; the video show was a JOB; you don't tell the Aristocrats joke at 8 o'clock at night on network tv, it would be funny though. But those guys know I like dirty stuff, I like clean stuff too.

Bob Saget

Funny But Dirty Sayings #925464
#29. I'm doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it's fantastic and it makes me very happy. I'm dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I'm working on a new tv show for cable and it's not set up yet.

Bob Saget

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1117386
#30. Their vaginas were just ships passing in the night, stopping to pick up every dirty sailor.

K.F. Germaine

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1144366
#31. Dick called, but he just left dirty voice-mail messages. Let's just say if I'm ever in the market for a massage involving canola oil and marabou feathers, I'm covered.

Molly Harper

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1152677
#32. The extraordinary mystique of hers made you think she lived on rose petals and listened to nothing but Mozart, but it wasn't true. She was quite funny and ribald. She could tell a dirty joke. She played charades with a great sense of fun and vulgarity, and she could be quite bitchy.

Andre Previn

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1164861
#33. Friends are like bras, attached near your heart for support. Foes are like panties, deported, every now and then, when they get dirty.

Santosh Kalwar

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1186698
#34. Impressive," Court offered, gallantly bending to retrieve the shoe. "You should join the theater."
"Fuck you."
"I owed you that."
"Revenge is a dish best served with a side of handcuffs and a hard ass-fucking. Remember that."
Really is a dirty fighter. Goddamn.

Finn Marlowe

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1274655
#35. I rolled my eyes. "Just go get your tattoo before I change me mind, you dirty fuck."
Alec waggled his eyebrows. "I'd give you a dirty fuck, kitten.

L.A. Casey

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1300137
#36. The tagline behind "House of Lies" is funny, dirty, business. The show is a comedy satire about how big business operates. Most Americans that work in corporate America should be able to relate to this show.

Larenz Tate

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1330855
#37. Malory! You've got a chipmunk on your pussy!

Tamara Thorne

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1513525
#38. She held up her calloused, grimy fingers. Leo couldn't help thinking there was nothing hotter than a girl who didn't mind getting her hands dirty. But of course, that was just a general comment. Didn't apply to Calypso. Obviously.

Rick Riordan

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1594774
#39. In this time of recession, it is the time for invention. Did you know both the telephone and the automobile were invented during recessions? So was 'talking dirty.'

Eugene Mirman

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1653440
#40. People have sex, even the religious ones. Yet, when sex is transferred into words, suddenly it's dirty, vulgar, immoral, trashy. Funny huh?

Hector Himeros

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1663305
#41. All you god damn dirty Catholics can cath-o-lick my balls.

Bo Burnham

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1714418
#42. If it's dirty, it's not funny, but if it's funny, it's not dirty.

Buddy Hackett

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1718675
#43. My friend has hand soap that smells like coconut. It's nice. Unless your hands are dirty from coconuts.

Demetri Martin

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1753056
#44. hornier than a bunny on ecstasy

Kyle Adams

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1829058
#45. The thing I don't get about paedophilia ... Why the hell do kids find old men in dirty raincoats so sexy?

Frankie Boyle

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1842629
#46. You win, you dirty evil butt-munch. I'll never not let you stay over again. Now let's go back to bed.

Ethan Day

Funny But Dirty Sayings #1855191

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