Top 100 Christmas Tip Jar Quotes
#1. Twas a cold Yuletide evening, and I wandered the stacks, shelving multiple titles that the patrons brought back. We toiled overtime at our library here, 'cause the powers that be cut our staffing this year.
David Davis
#2. Santa is like a queen bee. All the elves are his drones, who exist to feed him royal jelly, which I guess would be milk and cookies. If an elf escapes and eats royal cookies, it will turn into another Santa. That's what all those mall Santas are. They're trying to start their own festive colonies.
Thomm Quackenbush
#3. There are angels on the tree?"
"Ah, because we all pray there are really angels watching over us, don't we?
Heather Graham
#4. What is important is what can be explored throughout Christmas, in the company of your Soul.
Eleesha
#6. [It's Not About You, Mr. Santa Claus,] is a fun read and a twist on Christmas, because it does involve Santa Claus and Jesus, and it doesn't say that Santa Claus is bad, but it's the child explaining to Santa Claus the true reason for the season is Jesus.
Soraya Diase Coffelt
#7. Began to read a piece on how a high street chain of stores had banned Cliff Richard's Christmas songs.
Robert Galbraith
#8. People are so nice to each other on holidays ... especially at Christmas. Why don't people beat up each other at Christmas? Now that would be fun!
Klaus Nomi
#9. One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly."
~ (1919-), American writer, producer, humorist.
Andy Rooney
#10. This Christmas ...
Say a prayer for those in need. Be a friend to those in despair. Give all ... the gift of peace!
Timothy Pina
#11. Dear Friends all, A thousand Christmas pleasures and blessings to you
good resolutions and bright hopes for the New Year! Amen. People who can't be witty exert themselves to be pious or affectionate.
George Eliot
#12. I'm still a Chicagoan in the fact that I can't do Christmas with sand and palm trees. It just doesn't compute - it's not Christmas unless your face hurts when you step outside.
Johnny Galecki
#13. I truly believe that if we keep telling the Christmas story, singing the Christmas songs, and living the Christmas spirit, we can bring joy and happiness and peace to this world.
Norman Vincent Peale
#14. Harry and Ron had barely finished their third helpings of Christmas pudding when Hermione ushered them out of the Hall to finalise their plans for the evening.
J.K. Rowling
#15. Last year, Americans spent $450 billion on Christmas. Clean water for the whole world, including every poor person on the planet would cost about $20 billion. Let's just call that what it is: A material blasphemy of the Christmas season.
Jim Wallis
#16. I detest 'Jingle Bells,' 'White Christmas,' 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer,' and the obscene spending bonanza that nowadays seems to occupy not just December, but November and much of October, too.
Richard Dawkins
#17. You don't think I'm Satan, do you?"
"Of course not." She smiled across the table at him. "Snidely Whiplash, maybe. But not Satan.
Sierra Donovan
#18. It's lunacy out there. Christmas makes people insane. And that bit about goodwill toward men? It sure as hell doesn't apply to retail.
J.D. Robb
#19. I do like Christmas. I do understand that there are people who hate it, and there are other religions that resent it. So, I speak to everybody - I try to speak to every kind of minority and majority that cannot escape the steamroller known as Christmas.
John Waters
#20. God seeks to influence humanity. This is at the heart of the Christmas story. It is the story of light coming into the darkness, of a Savior to show us the way, of light overcoming the darkness, of God's work to save the world.
Adam Hamilton
#21. It's easy to write a short story and frighten people for five pages, but to work at length, when you do it as in 'The Turn Of The Screw' or 'A Christmas Carol,' it's different; you have to build it and build it.
Susan Hill
#22. Nothing would keep him from loving her. She was everything he wanted. She was his.
Lisa Carlisle
#23. One Christmas I had no money, and so I went home and just, like, wrote a poem; I mean, I didn't write them, but I just handed out poems as Christmas presents. Like, 'Here's a Pablo Neruda poem that really made me think of you.'
June Diane Raphael
#24. Mrs. Rimas cried at the mention of the wafer and the traditional Christmas blessing. God grant that we are all together again next year.
Ruta Sepetys
#25. Halloween is one of my favorite holidays. Christmas and the others can end up making you sad, because you know you should be happy. But on Halloween you get to become anything that you want to be
Ava Dellaira
#26. Why in the world have we never found what we're really looking for? Because what we need is often the very thing we won't accept. And sadly, in turning away the God we need, we need to understand that we have chosen to live without everything we need.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
#27. Christmas is about Christ. When we forget that, we lose the true magic of Christmas.
Toni Sorenson
#28. It was an actual Christmas tree farm. We had, like, 15 acres. It was really fun as a kid. I also spent my summers at the Jersey Shore, on the bay in Stone Harbor. I walked everywhere barefoot. It was just the most amazing, magical way to grow up.
Taylor Swift
#29. I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.
Milton Berle
#30. At the age of 12, my parents gave me a chemistry set for Christmas, and experimentation soon became a consuming passion in my life.
John Vane
#31. I couldn't live on the singing at first, so I worked as a cleaner, in a launderette, in a garage, face painting and doing the windows of shops at Christmas, 'cause I had been to art college.
Imelda May
#32. The truth is Christmas evolved from the Roman holiday Saturnalia, a winter festival where men gave gifts to each other. They also would get drunk, have sex with each other and beat their wives
Huey Freeman The Boondocks
#33. My son has a big Christmas problem - what do you buy for a father who has everything and you're using it?
Milton Berle
#34. A Merry Christmas to us all, my dears. God bless us!" Which all the family re-echoed. "God bless us every one!" said Tiny Tim, the last of all.
Charles Dickens
#35. Michael Cole, what did you get for Christmas? Except drunk.
Jerry Lawler
#36. When I was really young, I loved the movie 'White Christmas' - I still do - and I thought Rosemary Clooney was so pretty. When I was, like, nine, I would tell people, 'You know who I kind of look like? Rosemary Clooney.'
Tina Fey
#37. I forced myself to open my eyes. I was a Puckett, damn it. And Pucketts didn't lose our nerve. We schemed, we interjected, we occasionally drank too much and told someone what we really thought of them at a Christmas party, but we never lost our nerve.
Molly Harper
#38. I came running down the stairs that morning, like it was Christmas. My parents were already up. In my family, presents never waited; they were there upon waking. Our family has a problem with what they called delayed gratification. We want what we want when we want it, and we always want it now.
Neal Shusterman
#39. I always liked it when people go back in time to discover things about themselves, like with 'A Christmas Carol' and you're getting a tour of your life by the ghosts of Christmas past, present and future.
John Cusack
#40. For centuries men have kept an appointment with Christmas. Christmas means fellowship, feasting, giving and receiving, a time of good cheer, home.
William Jewett Tucker
#41. The things we do at Christmas are touched with a certain extravagance, as beautiful, in some of its aspects, as the extravagance of nature in June.
Robert Collyer
#42. There's more, much more, to Christmas Than candlelight and cheer; It's the spirit of sweet friendship That brightens all year. It's thoughtfulness and kindness, It's hope reborn again, For peace, for understanding, And for goodwill to men!
Calvin Coolidge
#43. Once again, we come to the holiday season, a deeply religious time that each of us observes, in his own way, by going to the mall of his choice.
Dave Barry
#44. He had done nothing on Christmas day, just wandered around outside in the frozen woods. Hard ground, chill winds and bare branches that looked like they'd been dipped in sugar. None of it seemed real, like walking around in a desolate dream, but one he didn't want to wake up from.
R.D. Ronald
#45. Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock. Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring. Snowing and blowing up bushels of fun. Now the jingle hop has begun.
Bobby Helms
#46. I give out Atlas Shrugged as Christmas presents, and I make all my interns read it.
Paul Ryan
#47. Do kids ever tire of Christmas? The excitement of this job is never dull because in all the years and thousands of games I've called I've never done the same one twice.
Dick Enberg
#48. I could stand on my head and flick the bean right there at the dinner table and my mom would be all, "Honey, Christmas is family time, we should be together" and make me finish in front of everyone.
Christopher Moore
#49. It is the custom to sneer at the modern apartment-house, television, big-city Christmas, with its commercial taint ... office parties, artificial ... Christmas trees ... but future generations in search of their lost Christmases may well remember its innocence; yes, and its beauty, too.
Paul Gallico
#50. Everyday should be Christmas. Christ first loved us, we ought to love one another.
Lailah Gifty Akita
#51. The year end brings no greater pleasure then the opportunity to express to you season's greetings and good wishes. May your holidays and new year be filled with joy.
Charles Dickens
#52. Far too often, it is at the moment where we finally stand on the very precipice of some great thing that we turn and abandon it, for it is at these seminal moments that fear wins and greatness dies. The beauty of Christmas is that God steps over precipices.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
#53. Again - "Are you going home for Christmas?" - and asked it in some sort of way that brought tears to my eyes and made it almost unnecessary for him to move on to his answer to the question, which was that home, finally, is the manger in Bethlehem, the place where at midnight even the oxen kneel.
Frederick Buechner
#54. Do you mind if I call you?" Adam asked.
"You can if you want to," Patrice replied as she unlocked her dorm room door.
"Can I get your number?"
"You already have it."
"I do?"
"Check your right pocket in your jacket.
Daria White
#55. People think it's terribly sad to spend Christmas alone, but it's no sadder, really, than spending any other day alone, is it?
Paula Hawkins
#56. To the hottest wolf in a kilt, fighting or not, with the sexiest legs a lassie ever set eyes on.
Terry Spear
#57. Agatha's mum gives me nice clothes for Christmas, and her dad talks to me about my future like I'm not going to die in a ball of fire.
Rainbow Rowell
#58. You know you've had too much to eat for Christmas dinner when you slump down onto a beanbag and realize ... there is no beanbag.
David Letterman
#59. What was Christmas for, if not joy?
And they had the most special gift of all to celebrate.
Roxanne Snopek
#60. The real spirit of Christmas lies in the life and mission of the Master.
Howard W. Hunter
#61. Making a Christmas album is looked upon by some people as the thing you do when you are heading towards retirement.
Annie Lennox
#62. When you're rearranging the furniture to make way for the decorations and the tree, make sure you rearrange your heart to make room for the Savior of Mankind.
Toni Sorenson
#63. I hate, loathe, and despise Christmas. It's a time when single people have to take cover or get out of town.
Kristin Hunter
#64. The sure path to tomorrow was plotted in a manger and paved on a cross. And although this sturdy byway is mine for the taking, I have incessantly chosen lesser paths. And maybe it is time to realize that Christmas is a promise that I can walk through the world and never get lost in the woods.
Craig D. Lounsbrough
#65. I love 'White Christmas.' That's one of my favorites just because I love the music. I love the story, Bing Crosby. It's just one of my all time favorites. And it's hard to have a Christmas without seeing a little bit of Jimmy Stewart and angels running around town.
Scott Bakula
#66. When we kicked off and no one came to mark me I thought, 'Hello, it's Christmas'
Paul Merson
#67. I discovered that the real meaning of Christmas has nothing to do with you at all. It is about a very special gift. I want to you tell you about this gift.
Soraya Diase Coffelt
#68. A scientist said, "The very best way to send an idea is to wrap it up in a person." That was what happened at Christmas. The idea of divine love was wrapped up in a Person.
Halford Luccock
#69. The madness of Christmas is not to be resisted by any human means. It either stealthily creeps or crudely batters its way into every fastness or fortress of prudence all over the land.
Patrick Hamilton
#70. It's silly talking about how many years we will have to spend in the jungles of Vietnam when we could pave the whole country and put parking stripes on it and still be home by Christmas.
Ronald Reagan
#71. I have a musical called Goodbye and Good Luck, based on a Grace Paley short story. I also have King Island Christmas, and there are 20 different productions of it this year.
David Friedman
#72. I wonder what it feels like to be a woman whose Christmas present must be bought in cash. Liberating.
Gillian Flynn
#73. My wife wants something foreign for Christmas - like a Mexican divorce.
Milton Berle
#74. Would it not be well this Christmas to give first to the Lord, directly through obedience, sacrifice, and love, and then to give to him indirectly through gifts to friends and those in need as well as to our own? Should we do this, perhaps many of us would discover a new Christmas joy.
John Andreas Widtsoe
#75. It is not enough to celebrate Christmas. We need to be changed and shaped by what we are celebrating. If our spiritual life is no better in spite of all our praying, fasting, and church services, then we have not yet begun to fully respond to the significance of Advent and of the Nativity.
Vassilios Papavassiliou
#76. The dog that I was given on The Hills for Christmas is with my best friend's family.
Heidi Montag
#77. On a busy day twenty-two thousand people come to visit Santa, and I was told that it is an elf's lot to remain merry in the face of torment and adversity. I promised to keep that in mind.
David Sedaris
#78. They say that time is relative. I think the way it's treating me it's a distant one, maybe a bad uncle, and not welcome in my house this Christmas!!
Neil Leckman
#79. Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all thirty feet tall.
Larry Wilde
#80. And so it continued all day, wynde after wynde, from a room beyond came the whistle of a teakettle. Now, you really must join me. I've some marvelous Darjeeling, and some delicious petits fours a friend of mine gave me for Christmas.
Martha Grimes
#81. The tradition of putting candles on Christmas trees actually began in Germany. The person who came up with the idea is thought to have been Martin Luther, father of the Reformation.
Christopher Buckley
#82. I cut 'Diamond in My Crown' in my home in Georgia, because I wanted to use an old 1848 pump organ that my mother-in-law had gotten for Emory for Christmas one year. His mother would be proud to know that pump organ was made use of.
Patty Loveless
#83. 'The war in Iraq - if Osama was a Christian - it's the Christmas present he never would have expected.
Michael Scheuer
#84. Speaking of ... does this mean you get your phone back?" I shrug. "I don't really want that phone back. I'm hoping my whipped boyfriend will get me an iPhone for Christmas.
Colleen Hoover
#85. The church-bells of innumerable sects are all chime-bells to-day, ringing in sweet accordance throughout many lands, and awaking a great joy in the heart of our common humanity.
Edwin Hubbel Chapin
#86. Christmas teaches us to be loving, kind, giving, forgiving, and appreciating.
Debasish Mridha
#87. Focusing on the Lord and everlasting life can help us not only at Christmas, but through all the challenges of mortality.
Russell M. Nelson
#88. What could be more exciting than an October day? It's your birthday, Fourth of July and Christmas all rolled into one.
Peggy Toney Horton
#89. I'm one of those people who had Christmas and my birthday always combined, and generally, my birthday was pretty much ignored. But my parents are always good about making some kind of special effort to make me feel like I also have a birthday that exists.
Noel Wells
#90. I hate to say it, but Christmas as a kid was always a moneymaking venture for me. I played trumpet, and a friend of mine who played trombone and a guy who played tuba, every Christmas we'd go out for three or four days beforehand and play Christmas carols on our horns.
John Tesh
#92. The zombies in the cab were looking at us like it was Christmas 1996 and we had just taken the last Tickle Me Elmo dolls off the shelf.
Mark Tufo
#93. I was seriously considering giving both Ellie and Braden a lump of coal for their Christmas present this year as a thank-you for turning Joss into a normal person who annoyed her friends with her terrible matchmaking skills.
Samantha Young
#94. I get really grinchy right up until Christmas morning.
Dan Aykroyd
#95. Do you want to feel insecure? Count the number of Christmas cards you sent out, and then count those you received.
Milton Berle
#96. There'll always be Christmas as long as a light
Glows in the window to guide folks at night,
As long as a star in the heavens above,
Keeps shining down ... there'll be Christmas and love.
Edna Jaques
#97. He had promised Leslie that after Christmas he would stay home and fix up the house and plant his garden and listen to music and read books out loud and write only in his spare time.
Katherine Paterson
#99. Neither my mom nor my dad ever bought me any comic books. Certainly not for Christmas. I suspect that doing so would have violated the Parents' Code.
Michael Dirda
#100. In our open society, we are inclined to give to the less fortunate for the pure goodness of giving. We open our home to those who are alone on this holiday to spread some warmth into the life of another.
Jeff Miller
