Your Office Quotes

#1. Everything he's learned about the Civil Service tells him that having tea poured for you is one of the ferociously guarded signifiers of rank, like the grade of paintings from the Government Art Collection hung on your office wall, or the quality of your carpet.

Charles Stross

#2. The Internet of Things tell us that a lot of computer-enabled appliances and devices are going to become part of this system, too: appliances that you use around the house, that you use in your office, that you carry around with yourself or in the car. That's the Internet of Things that's coming.

Vint Cerf

#3. Lanie, you live 15 minutes away from your office and you get there at eight. Over two hours every day just to do your hair and makeup. Diana fuckin' Ross in her heyday probably took less time to get ready for a show. Babe, if that isn't high maintenance, I do not know what is.

Kristen Ashley

#4. Why is it always that a hot girl in your office is either married or carried?

Bhavik Sarkhedi

#5. Don't underestimate the power of your vision to change the world. Whether that world is your office, your community, an industry or a global movement, you need to have a core belief that what you contribute can fundamentally change the paradigm or way of thinking about problems.

Leroy Hood

#6. Ask for the sale when the mood is right. The worst possible place is in the prospects' office. Best place is a business breakfast, lunch or dinner. Next best is your office. Next best is a trade show. Ask early, and ask often.

Jeffrey Gitomer

#7. And yes.. There is one asshole in your office who gets paid really higher than you for his bullshit.. Called boss..

Himmilicious

#8. And there are so much easier ways to destroy a woman. You don't have to rape her or kill her; you don't even have to beat her. You can just marry her. You don't even have to do that. You can just let her work in your office for thirty-five dollars a week.

Marilyn French

#9. My favorite affirmation when I feel stuck or out of sorts is: Whatever I need is already here, and it is all for my highest good. Jot this down and post it conspicuously throughout your home, on the dashboard of your car, at your office, on your microwave oven, and even in front of your toilets!

Wayne Dyer

#10. Everyone I talked to was a recording-the bank, the elevator, your office, the school, a wrong number. You used to be able to call a wrong number and get a person.

Erma Bombeck

#11. Fairies, black, grey, green, and white,
You moonshine revellers, and shades of night,
You orphan heirs of fixed destiny,
Attend your office and your quality.
William Shakespeare

William Shakespeare

#12. I'm harmless. I don't have any ill will or ill thought towards anybody. When people know you're that way, you can say stuff that the creepy guy at your office could never get away with.

Adam Carolla

#13. The health of your family or your office or your city directly affects the health of it after. The better you are at handling high-stress situations with little information, those skills lead to resilience and the ability to recover afterward.

Amanda Ripley

#14. Comedy needs to happen naturally and be in touch with the character. When you see that guy in your office that everybody laughs at, he doesn't think he's funny. He's just being him, and that's the joke.

Terry Crews

#15. There's something about being there, on the set, in costume, in the moment, where you start to get a feel for the scene, which is not the same as sitting in your office writing it.

Lionel Wigram

#16. If you look around anywhere, layers are an important part of, not just the story and the concept, but the world you're in. If you just turn around and look at your office door, there's a door, and there's something behind it.

James Pearse Connelly

#17. In the 1950s and 1960s, it was a safe assumption that nearly everyone in your office had watched the same thing the previous night.

Chris Anderson

#18. You don't run a business from your office, you run a business looking at the faces of your customers to be sure they're happy.

Abdulazeez Henry Musa

#19. Every office interprets business casual differently. Feel out your office!

Sarah Lafleur

#20. Jeans of any sort should not be worn in nice restaurants. They pollute the landscape. They should also not be worn in the workplace if no other workers wear them. However, if your office is casual, go for it.

Letitia Baldrige

#21. Fill your office with plants and flowers. Spider plants and plants with hairy leaves absorb air pollutants (such as formaldehyde), produce oxygen, and add color to ease you eyes. Chrysanthemums, azaleas, and Gerbera daisies are similarly helpful.

Lewis Harrison

#22. I talk to my readers on social networking sites, but I never tell them what the book is about. Writing is lonely, so from time to time I talk to them on the Internet. It's like chatting at a bar without leaving your office. I talk with them about a lot of things other than my books.

Paulo Coelho

#23. If your office post is on an LRA path, then believe me your job is as good as lost. - Peter Kotara.

Ray Anyasi

#24. I forgot my balls," Lucas said coming over.
"Your what?"
"My balls. Apparently I left them in this room somewhere, because otherwise I'd have had them in your office in order to tell you that you're full of shit," Lucas replied.

Mia Watts

#25. To be sensitively aware of thought, of feeling, of the world about you, of your office and of nature, is to explode from moment to moment in affection. Without affection, every action becomes burdensome and mechanical and leads to decay.

Jiddu Krishnamurti

#26. See and be seen. Get out of your office, walk around, make yourself visible and accessible.

J. Willard Marriott

#27. As the semantic engineer, your job is naming the parts and tightening nuts and bolts. I suggest you get back to your office and do that - right now!

John Sladek

#28. If you're having a very high-adrenaline, high-movement experience in virtual reality and then all of a sudden you're back in your office, that disconnect is pretty notable.

Palmer Luckey

#29. I learned this a long time ago. If you call a guy into your office and shut the door, if there's media around, it sends up a red flag. I never wanted to embarrass a player.

Jim Leyland

#30. Never call your office while you're on vacation. That's always been one of my hard and fast rules.

William Manchee

#31. Double-check your voice mail message. Listen to your on-hold words and music. Write welcoming scripts for your telephone team. Pay attention to the music in your office and lobby areas. Make sure what your customers hear sounds good.

Ron Kaufman

#32. If you have the door to your office closed, you get more work done today and tomorrow, and you are more productive than most. But ten years later somehow, you don't quite know what problems are worth working on.

Richard Hamming

#33. I pick up the phone and press the few buttons until I can hear my heavy, creeper breathing over the PA system. I start beat boxing into the phone, making sure I spit more than necessary. Yo, Marky Mark. Please come to your office immediately, there's a funky bunch of manly stud waiting for you.

Jay McLean

#34. If somebody walks in to me and says, 'I'm a gay person, I want a job in your office,' I would say that's inappropriate, and they wouldn't be hired because that would mean they are promoting their agenda.

Mark Neumann

#35. Your environment (your home, your office, the magazines you read etc.) dramatically affects your levels of achievement

Robin Sharma

#36. To get the best coaching outcomes, always have your 1-on-1's on your employee's turf not yours. In your office the truth hides.

Marcus Buckingham

#37. Great motivators are visible at the front and lead by their actions. Hiding in your office or mysteriously traveling all the time on unknown missions are sure ways to cause the focus of your team to disperse.

Martin Zwilling

#38. In Los Angeles, I drive a hybrid and live in a very simple home. Anything you do from carrying a canteen of water to starting a recycling program in your office makes a difference. Reusing what you already have has always been green - from clothes to boxes to glass jars from the supermarket.

Rachel Boston

#39. Our happiness is completely and utterly intertwined with other people: family and friends and neighbors and the woman you hardly notice who cleans your office. Happiness is not a noun or verb. It's a conjunction. Connective tissue.

Eric Weiner

#40. Let's all work to get people to drink more good beer, so if someone walks into your office and says he drinks Corona, don't immediately call him a dickhead.

Michael Jackson

#41. If you do a single thing - and especially if there is a lot of money in that single thing - you should put a 'Welcome, Robots!' doormat outside your office," wrote technology expert Farhad Manjoo in Slate. "They're coming for you.

Robert Wachter

#42. When you're a very career-oriented woman, sometimes you don't have as much time to go meet all kinds of guys. You're a little bit limited to the guys that work in your office. I think a lot of girls can relate to that problem.

Piper Perabo

#43. Subtle persecution may happen to you in your office, school, or social gathering. You may not be "with it," or be "one of the crowd." No suffering that the Christian endures for Christ is ever in vain.

Billy Graham

#44. If you really want to be successful and you really want to be happy, don't have a job, have a purpose ... When you've got a purpose, the whole world is your office.

Robert Holden

#45. Well, that should do it," the man replied. "Oh, and I did put a small camera in your office, just to square things up. It's hidden, so you won't have to worry about somebody spotting it.

Diana Palmer

#46. Be prudent, diligent, temperate and discreet. Remember that every human being has a claim upon your kind offices.

Albert Pike

#47. Practise your confidence tricks on the street and you risk getting shot by trigger-happy security guards; do it in the office and you get put on the board.

James Scudamore

#48. Becoming a dad means you get transformed from the healthy, vibrant, intelligent, youthful person pictured in your wedding photo into a twitching, bewildered, sleep-deprived, Play-Dough-smeared creature who looks like the guy in the photo on the post office wall, only less chipper.

David Meurer

#49. Office not required" isn't just the future - it's the present. Now is your chance to catch up.

Anonymous

#50. Today is indeed an historic occasion when as a first chair-in-office woman I hand over to another woman chair in office, your Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, in the presence of a woman head of the Commonwealth, Her Royal Highness, Her Majesty the Queen of England.

Kamla Persad-Bissessar

#51. Do not set out to write with your eyes on the box office. It can't be done.

Ayn Rand

#52. You know, you spend your whole life feeling like you don't quite fit in anywhere. And then you walk into a room one day, whether it's at university or an office or some kind of club, and you just go, 'Ah. There they are.' And suddenly you feel at home.

Jojo Moyes

#53. Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas.

Johnny Carson

#54. Running for and holding public office requires little more than making informed decisions based on the facts, your values, and getting to know your fellow citizens. You'll need the courage to be yourself, and a desire to do the right thing. Chances are you're doing that already. In

Marian Walsh

#55. There's a reason why relationships don't work out. It's usually better to take a few steps back if you have any doubts before it gets complicated and you find yourself in a tangled web, not of your doing, but somehow you end up paying the price.

E.R. Wade

#56. On my honor, I swear to you, that from my first day in office to the last breath I draw, I will do everything in my power to make you proud of your government.

John McCain

#57. I was having the surreal experience of having myself show myself around my office and bullpen."
"Oh! My desk. I could've sat at my desk. I could've sat at your desk."
"No."
"It's a vid set."
"Even then, no.

J.D. Robb

#58. My only relationship policy is, don't bring your dirty laundry to work, no sex on company furniture and don't let it affect your work.

Paula Graves

#59. You have had indeed a fair trial. It is a shocking thing when a judge of your high office is shown to have betrayed the truth and his honor, and I sentence you to the penitentiary.

Florence Ellinwood Allen

#60. Don't believe the hype. I don't care how many number ones you have at the box office, I don't care how much they say you're great, don't believe it. Just stay in your lane and do what you're supposed to do.

Tyler Perry

#61. Did I make you spend so much time at the office? Did I make you play three rounds of golf last weekend? Answer: No, I didn't. I was too busy pinning your wife's ankles to her ears.

Sterling Archer

#62. You might be a redneck if getting a package from your post office requires a full tank of gas in the truck.

Jeff Foxworthy

#63. 'We really shouldn't look like a church.' I've heard that so much I want to vomit. 'Why?' I ask. 'Do you want your bank to look like a bank? Do you want your doctor's office to look like a doctor's office, or would you prefer your doctor to dress like a clown?'

Charles R. Swindoll

#64. Stand-up keeps you on your toes because it's instant. With TV and movies, you have to wait for the numbers to come in to see what happened at the box office. With stand-up, it's right there, that night, in your face.

Mo'Nique

#65. Why would you go anyplace without your iPad? This is the greatest invention. When it gets a little more power, my God. It's like my office.

Scott Raab

#66. Don't you loathe the word "workaholic"? It has nothing to do with an important thing, that you and your secretary are at the office until 6:30. But that's life, kiddo. 24-hour work doesn't go on in America. 24-hour work is what Italy and Holland did after the war. The lights never went out!

Diana Vreeland

#67. The presidency is probably the loneliest office in America. Regardless of your friends, regardless of how good your marriage is, regardless of anything, you are alone there at the top.

Robert Reich

#68. Life has been reduced to a series of long periods of boredom in the office punctuated by high-octane "experiences" which you can rack up on your list of things to do before you die. That's not really living: that is slavery with the occasional circus thrown in.

Tom Hodgkinson

#69. Because in the end, you won't remember the time you spent working in the office or mowing your lawn. Climb that goddamn mountain.

Jack Kerouac

#70. Please file your complaint with the office of 'I Don't Give a Fuck' and I'll be sure not to get back to you.

J.J. McAvoy

#71. Alright, macho babe boy, I'm not some little ditz to bat my eyelashes at the buff stud in black leather. Don't try your he-man tactics with me. I'll have you know, in my office, I'm known as the ball-breaker. (Amanda)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#72. You're like everyone else, Strike; you want your civil liberties when you've told the missus you're at the office and you're at a lap-dancing club, but you want twenty-four-hour surveillance on your house when someone's trying to force your bathroom window open. Can't have it both ways.

Robert Galbraith

#73. I heard 'More Than A Feeling' for the first time when somebody came running into my office in the engineering department and said, 'Your song's on the radio in the drafting department!'

Tom Scholz

#74. Politics comes and goes, but your principles don't. And everybody wants to be loved
not everybody ... You never heard anybody say, 'I want to be despised, I'm running for office.'

George W. Bush

#75. Abstract anger is great for rhetorical carrying on. You can go on endlessly about the post office, but it doesn't mean you're mad at your mailman.

P. J. O'Rourke

#76. I think I was brought up with an innate sense of responsibility because my dad was in the Foreign Office where you were in somebody else's country, and you were aware of your behaviour. And my mum worked for the NHS, so you were aware of your responsibility to your country.

Helen McCrory

#77. Citizenship in the 21st century requires more than paying your taxes and voting and occasionally running for office. That even if you're never in political office, you have political responsibilities. You can make your society stronger and better.

William J. Clinton

#78. So how critics will perceive your film or your work, or whether your movie is going to make $100 million at the box office, or whether you are going to be winning any awards - well, you have no control over that.

Charlize Theron

#79. If you're blessed enough to serve in public office, then you shouldn't just talk a good game about your values; you should cast your vote according to them.

John Thune

#80. NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

Ambrose Bierce

#81. Utility representatives will not show up at your door unannounced and will not ask for banking information in unsolicited phone calls. If you get a request for personal information that leaves you skeptical, contact my office and we can help determine if the call was legitimate.

Mike Beebe

#82. In the consciousness that another mind reflects your thought, you find the keenest satisfaction. Here is the high office of a friend, and in these high experiences is the point of attachment.

Samuel McChord Crothers

#83. On the way back from the doctor's office, my mom asked me if I'd written back to Dante. "Not Yet". "I think you should write to him". "Mom, I'm your son, not a suggestion box". She shot me a look. "Keep your eyes on the road", I said.

Benjamin Alire Saenz

#84. It's one thing to wait at a stop light or in a doctor's office. It's another thing to wait for news upon which your life depends. In those circumstances, our waiting highlights the fact that this situation is completely out of our control. We are totally dependent upon someone else

Alan Kraft

#85. When you're an artist, your personal life and your professional life kind of blend together. I'm writing from home so I don't have an office or anything. I don't know where to draw the line between "Okay, let's stop now and watch American Idol."

Daryl Wein

#86. My office has no walls. You can't be removed from your team to be successful. You have to be respectful of others.

Mickey Drexler

#87. I've got three friends that you'd call famous, but I'm sure after 20 years, most of my friends will be famous or work in television, because that's the nature of what your work is. When I was working in an office, most of my friends worked in offices.

Ricky Gervais

#88. There's a grand tradition of a lot of interesting stuff that happens to these post-presidents. Especially in this day and age where you leave office in your 50s and you can live another 40 years, easily. That's a lot of time.

David Mandel

#89. You've never had a job that you thought was secure. You don't think the Tonight Show is risk free. Especially when you saw what happened with your buddy Conan O'Brien. There is always a Plan B.I am ready to apply to the post office.

Jimmy Fallon

#90. Although it is the biggest time-waster in office life, you must never underrate the importance of the memo. You will be judged by the volume of your paper work.

Jilly Cooper

#91. Go work at the post office or Starbucks if you want balance in your life.

Jason Calacanis

#92. You can begin to be great to-day in your own home, in your store or office, on the street, everywhere; you can begin to make yourself known as great; and you can do this by doing everything you do in a great way

Wallace D. Wattles

#93. If you always use your stapler in one place, keep it there, instead of thinking that all the office supplies should go in one place. I've moved a lot of things around in my house because of that.

Gretchen Rubin

#94. It was clearly a lot more difficult in the field than in the office, where you could keep your distance and maintain a calculated composure. Being faced with real people was a far tougher call on one's judgement.

Sara Sheridan

#95. I'm very proud of 'The Office' - it was one of the best things I'll ever do. But you do become a slight victim of your own success in the sense that people think that's you, that's what you are, and that's what you'll play forever.

Martin Freeman

#96. I think you must have your own office. I don't believe ever in shared office spaces.

Keith Rabois

#97. One of the first houses we lived in was like out of a fairy story. We had a stream that ran through our garden, and we played with the ducks - we locked them in my mum's office, and they pooed everywhere. It was crazy, picking blackberries and mushrooms, rabbits running through your legs.

Emilia Clarke

#98. For most of the millions of people who watch TED videos at the office, it's a middlebrow diversion and a source of factoids to use on your friends. Except TED thinks it's changing the world, like if 'This American Life' suddenly mistook itself for Doctors Without Borders.

Alex Pareene

#99. Take Obama's challenge, in January 2010, to the assembled CEOs at the Forum on Modernizing Government: "If you can book dinner on OpenTable, or a flight on Southwest or United online, then why shouldn't you be able to make an appointment at your local Social Security office the same way?

Aneesh Chopra

#100. You go into the office and take a book or two from the shelves. You read a few lines, like your life depended on reading 'em right. But you know your life doesn't depend on anything that makes sense, and you wonder where in the hell you got the idea it did; and you begin to get sore.

Jim Thompson