Quotes About Halloween Candy

#1. And do you know what happens to people who give out second chances like Halloween candy? They get fucked over.

A. Zavarelli

#2. In recent years, there have been reports of people with twisted minds putting razor blades and poison in taffy apples and Halloween candy. It is no longer safe to let your child eat treats that come from strangers.

Ann Landers

#3. Halloween is tomorrow. A group of wine experts has actually come up with a list of the best wines to pair with Halloween candy. They say, White wine goes great with Skittles, red wine goes great with Twix, and ... we're alcoholics, aren't we?

Jimmy Fallon

#4. My favorite Halloween candy is the candy corn. It comes in four colors: white, yellow, orange, brown. Those are also the stages of your teeth rotting after you eat it.

Jay Leno

#5. The great thing about candy is that it can't be spoiled by the adult world. Candy is innocent. And all Halloween candy pales next to candy corn, if only because candy corn used to appear, like the Great Pumpkin, solely on Halloween.

Rosecrans Baldwin

#6. I used to compete with my brother to see who could get the most Halloween candy, I remember doing that.

Jermell Charlo

#7. Right ... here's what we'll do: I'll get the kids. You take your shower. After homework and playtime, I'll challenge them to shots until they pass out. Then we'll eat the rest of their Halloween candy while binge-watching Game of Thrones.

Penny Reid

#8. Halloween was the best holiday, in my opinion, because it was all about friends, monsters, and candy, rather than family and responsibility.

Margee Kerr

#9. Never take candy from strangers.

Rita Rudner

#10. I do not like candy. I do not like knocking on strangers' doors. I do not like having to deal with the candy disaster that is Halloween. I resent it.

Rachel Zucker

#11. I only eat candy on Halloween. No lie.

Michael Trevino

#12. You make people interested in you by keeping secrets, not by passing them out like candy at Halloween.

Bryn Greenwood

#13. This ain't Halloween." he said.
"What's that mean?"
"Means I ain't sharin' my candy.

Jane Seville

#14. I'm not fond of a tradition that requires people to open the door for strangers. Or for kids to take candy from strangers.

Megan Erickson

#15. We had nine pails of candy for Halloween, now we are down to one. They go for a lot of the candy mixes. I think that they buy them for themselves sometimes.

Brenda V. Smith

#16. In the midst of all the candy and commercialism, let's not lose sight of the true meaning of Halloween: tree worship and animal sacrifice.

Dana Gould

#17. I was born on Halloween, and until I was eight years old my parents had me convinced that the candy people gave out when I knocked on their doors was birthday presents.

Ransom Riggs

#18. Last Halloween a kid tried to rip my face off. He thought it was a mask. Now it's different when I open the door the kids hand me candy.

Rodney Dangerfield

#19. A candy coloured clown they call the sandman
Tiptoes into my room every night
Just to sprinkle stardust and whisper;
"Go to sleep, everything is alright"

Roy Orbison

#20. Halloween revolves around delicious candy, excessive alcohol, and horny women dressed as sluts. This also describes my vision of Heaven.

Tucker Max

#21. On Halloween, don't you know back when you were little, your mom tells you don't eat any candy until she checks it? I used to be so tempted to eat my candy on the way to other people's houses. That used to be such a tease.

Derrick Rose

#22. I wasn't allowed to have sugar as a kid. We didn't have candy or soda or anything, so Easter and Halloween were my favorite times 'cause I could eat as much candy as I wanted.

Kaley Cuoco

#23. Candy corn. For Halloween that is my favorite candy, but it doesn't come around that often and I like that.

Daniel Jacobs

#24. I had been terrified of Halloween my entire adult life. Loved it as a kid, but the minute I got out of college, there were little kids at my door demanding candy, which, No. 1, I couldn't afford, and, No. 2, if I had candy, it would be mine.

Jen Lancaster

#25. In our town, Halloween was terrifying and thrilling, and there was a whiff of homicide. We'd travel by foot in the dark for miles, collecting candy, watching out for adults who seemed too eager to give us treats.

Rosecrans Baldwin

#26. So the first time you hear the concept of Halloween when you're a kid your brain can't even process the information. You're like: "What is this? What did you say?" "What did you say about giving out candy? Who's giving out candy?" "Everyone that we know is just giving out candy!"

Jerry Seinfeld

#27. I feel very vulnerable at Halloween. I feel that people who might come to the door might not have candy intentions. I'm a little lady and I can be overcome.

Zelda Rubinstein

#28. Halloween's coming. Kids get very imaginative in my neighborhood. Last year, three kids showed up as Goldman Sachs executives and demanded 4.5 billion pieces of candy.

Jay Leno

#29. A solid 70 percent of houses guessed that I was dressed as a fancy pimp. Whatever - I still got candy. Molly went as a calculator. So, anyway, that was the Halloween I dressed as A Source of Concern to My Family.

Dave Holmes

#30. Last Halloween I ran out of candy and I had to give the kids nicotine gum.

David Letterman

#31. Did you know that at one time trick-or-treating was stopped? It's true. During World War II children were not allowed to trick or treat because there was a sugar shortage.

Linda Bozzo

#32. This Halloween, the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.

Conan O'Brien

#33. On Halloween, kids get to assume, for one night the outward forms of their innermost dread, and they're also allowed to take candy from strangers - the scariest thing of all.

Kate Christensen

#34. I have two rules when you come to my house on Halloween. Wear a costume - 'cause if you've manned your door at your own house, you know how many kids will roll up, 14 years old with no costume and an attitude. My other rule: don't grab. Let me assess you and then design a candy situation for you.

Greg Behrendt

#35. Every Halloween I missed being a kid, getting to dress up and eat tons of candy. The only thing I got to do now was ... eat tones of Candy. Not half bad

Jennifer L. Armentrout

#36. According to USA Today, 74 percent of Americans plan to hand out candy this Halloween. Although President Obama thinks it should be just the top 1 percent.

Jay Leno

#37. What we think of as Halloween is really the product of media barons, city mayors, and candy-makers. You know, before the 1920s, Halloween was really a terrible, terrible night.

Chuck Palahniuk

#38. Halloween was confusing. All my life my parents said, "Never take candy from strangers." And then they dressed me up and said, "Go beg for it." I didn't know what to do! I'd knock on people's doors and go, "Trick or treat." "No thank you."

Rita Rudner

#39. It's true there are moments - foolish moments, ecstasy on a tree stump - when I'm all but gone, scattered I like to think like seed, for I'm the sort now in the fool's position of having love left over which I'd like to lose; what good is it now to me, candy ungiven after Halloween?

William H Gass