Top 100 He's Not My Boyfriend Quotes
#1. Who gets the change?" the clerk asked. "You or ... your fella?"
Oh, he's not my boyfriend," I said. "He's my mother.
Wally Lamb
#2. He's not my boyfriend."
"Ha. That's a good one. I saw you two tonsil surfing out there."
I could kill her. "I don't even have tonsils!"
"I know that and I bet Nick knows that too, now." She slaps her leg because she's just too funny for words.
Carrie Jones
#3. After all, he's not my boyfriend! For that matter, he wouldn't be able to tell a healthy sound from an unhealthy one. He'd have to have his ears cleaned first, since he's becoming alarmingly hard of hearing. But enough about my illness. I'm fit as a fiddle again. I've grown almost half an
Anne Frank
#4. I like your boyfriend," Dahra said. "Not many guys volunteer to carry ten gallons of diarrhea and vomit."
Lana laughed. "He's not my boyfriend."
"Yeah, well, he can be mine if he wants to be. He's cute. And he carries crap.
Michael Grant
#5. I promise not to make fun of your boyfriend anymore."
"He's not my boyfriend!
Marissa Meyer
#6. I don't need a boyfriend to be happy. If I meet someone and I want to be with him, then I will be. I'm very confident in being single until I find someone who I'm extremely crazy about and who I want to devote my time and love to. Until then, I will just be on my own and I am totally fine with that,
Nina Dobrev
#7. (The new boyfriend) knows I write every day for hours but has no idea that all I'm writing about is me. It seems wiser to let him think I'm an aspiring novelist instead of just an alcoholic with a year of sobriety who spends eight hours a day writing about the other 16.
Augusten Burroughs
#8. To be honest, I felt more myself with that haircut. I felt bold, and it felt empowering because it was my choice. It felt sexy too. Maybe it was the bare neck, but for some reason I felt super-, supersexy.
Emma Watson
#9. Sitting beside Abe was Adrian Ivashkov
my more-or-less boyfriend. Adrian was a royal Moroi
and another spirit user like Lissa. He'd been crazy about me (and often just crazy) ever since we first met
Richelle Mead
#10. I don't mean to take the bow off the end of your rain, but you gotta be smart about your first boyfriend.
C. Kennedy
#11. If you were expecting Prince Charming, I'm sorry. He's with his boyfriend.
Shayla Black
#12. It took me two years to give him all of my heart, and he threw it away in one night.
Dannika Dark
#13. 'Firelight' is a beautiful story about a lot of young women. My character, Caroline, is a girl who has a bad boyfriend, and he ends up getting her locked up and incarcerated.
Q'orianka Kilcher
#14. Your boyfriend's penis is not an awkward string of spaghetti that has to be scooped up and sucked down. The Emperor of China once asked Lao-tzu: How should I rule the kingdom? To which Lao-tzu replied: Rule the kingdom as you would cook a small fish. A really good blowjob is the same.
Chloe Thurlow
#15. My wife is the most savage critic. She doesn't feel intimidated by my reputation. As far as she's concerned, she's just criticising a boyfriend who'd recently had a go at fiction. She can tell me to abandon whole novels.
Kazuo Ishiguro
#16. She sits down at the end of my bed again. "Who were you with? Do you have a boyfriend now or something?"
I can't help but laugh. If I have a boyfriend, his name is Death. And I'm pretty sure Roman is in love with him too. It's a love triangle gone wrong.
Jasmine Warga
#17. I haven't had time to think about a relationship! I literally have not had a boyfriend in almost five years. I've never even hooked up with anybody I've worked on a movie with.
Shailene Woodley
#19. Detective, I don't know where the boyfriend is, really, I said. And it was true, considering tide, current, and the habits of marine scavengers. -Dexter
Jeff Lindsay
#20. In certain states, if a woman makes $12,000 a year, and lives with her quarter-of-a million dollar boyfriend and they don't get married, as long as they don't get married, she gets maybe 20 or 30 thousand dollars in pre-tax benefits in terms of food stamps, health care and housing allowance.
Foster Friess
#21. I'm for gay elopement, not for gay weddings. I've been with my boyfriend for twenty years. I don't feel like that would validate our relationship in any way. But I would really fight for someone else to have the right. Just elope, though, please.
David Sedaris
#23. I'm Lily's boyfriend. She lives with me. In my house."
I need to get a handle on this jealousy.
Helena Hunting
#24. How are you, and I'm not her boyfriend. I break up with her every day, but she won't go away.
Jettie Woodruff
#25. Her last boyfriend had been homicidal and her current one was oblivious to the fact that she was a vampire.
Richelle Mead
#26. Berta, whose boyfriend had walked so far to see her, went out without her star and was immediately arrested and sent to a concentration camp.
Edith Hahn Beer
#27. You come on as a guest. You don't get the girl anymore. But that is our lives. You start off as the boyfriend, then you are the lover, then you are the husband, then you are the father, and then you are the grandfather.
Albert Finney
#28. Girlfriends are not wives. I draw the line at married women. Actually, women married to men with guns. If someone's girlfriend wants to make herself available, that's her business. Just don't give my name to your boyfriend.
Jack Dancer
#29. Geez, Em, stop checking him out so noticeably."
"Sorry! It's just so hard. I mean he's my boyfriend's identical twin. Obviously I like this brand." I gestured with my hand up and down, indicating Jace.
Kimberly Lauren
#30. Speaking of ... does this mean you get your phone back?" I shrug. "I don't really want that phone back. I'm hoping my whipped boyfriend will get me an iPhone for Christmas.
Colleen Hoover
#31. I didn't get married. I do have a boyfriend. We live together.
Melissa Joan Hart
#32. I was very friendly with Jimi Hendrix because my boyfriend at the time, Tommy Weber, was making a film about him, so I would go to all of his shows.
Charlotte Rampling
#33. Levi shouldn't get to make her feel this way - he shouldn't even have access to her chest. Levi wasn't her boyfriend. He wasn't family. She didn't choose him.
Rainbow Rowell
#34. Ambassador Winters, allow me to introduce my aunt Abby and her ... boyfriend.' Townsed tensed. Abby glared. And Rebecca Baxter looked like she was going to choke on her chewing gum.
Ally Carter
#35. All my life, it's been the same with men. Being a woman who is famous and adored by men is very hard for any boyfriend to handle. All my boyfriends end up insecure.
Samantha Fox
#36. It was Chase who had obtained the information from the girl's boyfriend during a party in an Irish pub, simply by using his British friendliness and charm.
Stefania Mattana
#37. I didn't really get into boys until my junior year of high school, when I had my first boyfriend. But for the most part I was always playing sports, so I was too busy for them!
Jennie Finch
#38. Abby did a little happy dance before jogging down the hall to the bedroom. The corners of my mouth turned up. What other woman would be that excited to see her boyfriend trade punches? No wonder I fell in love with her.
Jamie McGuire
#39. No relationship is perfect nor will anyone ever be the best boyfriend or girlfriend. Long as you put in the effort and try to make your lover happy. That's all we can ask for.
Kevin McCarty
#40. The goal of Christian dating is not to have a boyfriend or girlfriend but to find a spouse. Have that in mind as you get to know one an- other, and if you're not ready to commit to a relationship with the end goal of marriage, it's better not to date but simply to remain friends.
Mark Driscoll
#41. I think there's something incredibly sexy about a woman wearing her boyfriend's T-shirt and underwear.
Calvin Klein
#42. You've got one life, live it. Follow your dreams, quit your job, drop out of school, tell your boyfriend that he's lousy and walk out the door. This is your time. This is your life. You know what? Dream as big as you want to, its the cheapest thing you'll ever do.
Jared Leto
#43. During breakfast there is something I cannot resist, apart from my boyfriend - it's actually the phone. I have a phone breakfast. Always. I call friends, boyfriend, family. Checking who is where. 'Is everything fine?' This is breakfast.
Christian Louboutin
#44. If you ever want to know how a man truly feels about you, do absolutely nothing. Then you'll have your answer.
Miya Yamanouchi
#45. I think once I was in high school - I had boyfriends and stuff like that, but I think when I was younger, I went through a period where I looked like a boy, and people thought I was a boy.
Amanda Peet
#46. They've loved you your whole life and you've been gone for days. I've just loved you for the better part of a week and losing you just 'bout drove me crazy.
Amanda Lance
#47. I had a really great time tonight. I got to eat great food, meet new people and even play on a stage with you. But you wanna know the best part of the whole night? It was when I got to pretend I was your boyfriend.
Marie Coulson
#48. She got herself a boyfriend she wants us to meet. He's studying chemistry. A senior. She said that 3 or 4 times on the phone. Senior. Like it's supposed to mean something to me, as long as I been grown. Senior ain't nothing but a year. Young man's distinction.
Ravi Howard
#49. The thing to remember about a kick is you go for his twigs and berries" ~Declan~
Ilsa Madden-Mills
#50. You're married to a woman who has no objection to another woman joining the couple. Then she brings in her boyfriend. Suddenly you realize - my God! - you can love more than one person. In fact, you can love several people at the same time.
Volkmar Sigusch
#51. He was even more overprotective than my stepfather. But in a boyfriend, that kind of thing is actually attractive.
Meg Cabot
#52. I become a waterwheel, turning and tasting you, as long as water moves.
Rumi
#53. I'm glad I have you for my boyfriend." "Me too," I said. "Sometimes I have to pinch myself." She pinched my arm and smiled. "You're so cute.
Richard Paul Evans
#54. I'm gonna be the best damn boyfriend you ever had."
"Casey? I think you already are.
Renae Kaye
#55. I went to prom with my boyfriend, but after the dance he left me at a party all by myself. It was awful!
Crystal Reed
#56. Exactly why I don't have a boyfriend," I whisper, turning to the window. Because you've referenced The Lord of the Rings twice before lunch, or because you're talking to yourself? I have to admit, I've got me there.
David Arnold
#57. he expects me to elaborate. Boundaries. These damn people need boundaries. "So no boyfriend, but you're not a virgin?" he prods, seeming to delight
C.M. Owens
#59. If you're fighting with your boyfriend, you can go to the movies and cry it out and leave happy because the ending of the film is happy.
Lindsay Lohan
#60. Meeting Justin Bieber was interesting. We were backstage at The Voice, and he was there premiering his "Boyfriend" music video. I was in six-inch heels, so I was towering over him like a giant.
Erin Willett
#61. I never tell my boyfriend that I'm busy when I'm not. No matter how effective they are, cheap techniques like that just don't agree with me. So it's always okay, it's always all right. In my opinion the surest way to hook a man is to be as open with him as possible.
Banana Yoshimoto
#62. I almost saw your boyfriend naked this morning."
I laughed at the look on her face. "I don't know what to say to that, you're welcome?
Jay Crownover
#63. It's a mood record. Like one night you're going to be down in the dumps depressed because you're thinking about your ex-boyfriend and the next moment you're gonna be like screw him you know? And the next one you're saying to yourself 'God I'm in love.'
Willa Ford
#64. Any guy, even imaginary, would just feel like second best. Second best to what? I don't even have an image of the perfect boyfriend. I just know he must exist. Because I have all these feelings-love, longing, wanting to be touched, dreaming of being kissed-yet no one to focus them on.
Tabitha Suzuma
#65. If you notice yourself viewing a potential partner as a "work in progress", that's a sign to find someone else.
Miya Yamanouchi
#66. I love the virtuosity and imaginative chutzpah of 'Da Vinci's Demons,' and not just because my boyfriend is in it!
Hattie Morahan
#67. I've only had one serious boyfriend, but we dated for three years.
Miranda Cosgrove
#68. There's a reason I always look nice when I go to work." I kept a scowl on my face while she hustled me upstairs.
"Because you'll get fired if you look like a slob?"
"Because, my little grouch, it makes me feel better on the inside if I like how I look on the outside.
Stephie Davis
#69. My name is Kyran. You look like an honorable woman," he whispered, practicing what he would say to any prospective mate. "I have a home with my parents and my brother. There we will live and you will be part of our family. Would you like to give me many children?
Michelle M. Pillow
#70. Look at me. Home boy wore combat boots to the beach. I know you don't want to call that your boyfriend, I know you don't.
Lauren Conrad
#71. And so we go and I meet his parents. And it's a very strange thing meeting your girlfriend's boyfriend's parents for the first time. Part of you is angry for obvious reasons and part of you still wants to make a good impression. On a side note, they seemed in perfect health.
Mike Birbiglia
#72. She had an English boyfriend who called her more often than she needed to hear from him, a savings account, a mobile phone, an Oyster Card, and a place to live that made her feel as if she was in a movie. She was a London girl.
Rosie Thomas
#73. When I finally bought one, the Buchla was my only piece of furniture. I lived with that thing. It was my boyfriend! I thought there was something wrong with me, because I was in love with a machine
Suzanne Ciani
#74. When I'm in New York my boyfriend buys me sneakers and vice versa.
Lily Allen
#75. I loved when my boyfriends would call me their Amazon girl.
Patti Hansen
#76. A letter to Dear Abby: I am a twenty-three-year-old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting pretty expensive and I think my boyfriend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.* (f)
Walker Percy
#77. She knew it! Charlotte just knew it! And now her daughter was boyfriend-less! Yes! Wait-no! Oh no, poor Lu.
Shannon Hale
#78. Dogs and children loved my boyfriend. It was a simple fact.
Sarah Dessen
#79. Okay, we get it, Jodi-with-an-i," I said, smiling pleasantly up at her. "You have an adorable son and
are still quite available. Dennis, however, is with me. If you would just take your boobs out of my
boyfriend's face, I would deeply appreciate it.
Kristan Higgins
#80. It means that he looks like my boyfriend, but I don't say it out loud.
Janet Evanovich
#81. Aves hasn't mentioned a boyfriend," Lock chimed in, "and we're just dying to hear all about you." Liar. My friends were filthy lying sadists.
Lish McBride
#82. I opened my mouth and kissed you then, the first time all night, attacked you and surrendered completely, and let's get out of here. I'm ready, I'm finished, let's not break up, no, no. Take me home, my boyfriend, my love.
Daniel Handler
#83. Anorexics never have boyfriends ... That's one way to know you don't have anorexia, if you have a boyfriend.
Ann Coulter
#84. I'd rather sit in bed and watch TV. All of my ex-boyfriends, of course, not Paris, would be like, 'What's the problem? You're so not sexual.'
Paris Hilton
#85. I think I subconsciously put myself in these situations where the girlfriend isn't pleased with me. I'm useless as a boyfriend. That's how I managed to write all these songs.
Tom Odell
#86. We are very isolated, far from boyfriends and friends, so we have to be strong, smart and very professional.
Eva Herzigova
#87. What has first drawn him to Max was the man's unyielding character, not whether he was real-life boyfriend material.
K.A. Merikan
#88. I suspect people always thought I had a boyfriend, so nobody came after me.
Ziyi Zhang
#89. I had a serious boyfriend in high school, but we would take breaks in between. You shouldn't always have a boyfriend!
Heather Morris
#90. Recently thought of deleting my Facebook account and start using twitter, but realized it's not easy. Facebook has become like the boyfriend I no longer like but scared to dump because I've invested so much time in the relationship.
Manasa Rao
#91. It wasn't a little kiss, Not like your first peck or like the time you made out with your junior high boyfriend behind the movie theater. It was throw-your-arms-around-his-neck, bury-your-fingers-in-his-hair, why-haven't-we-done-this-before kissing
Jenna Evans Welch
#92. And can you get this girl something with a laxative effect?" I add to the waitress, refusing to spare Sophie a glance as I slide my menu back into place. "My treat. I just can't stand to see someone so full of shit, you know? Especially when her boyfriend keeps feeding her more of it.
Dahlia Adler
#93. A lot of times I play a fat woman with cats who has no boyfriends. And in real life, I'm allergic to cats and I've had a boyfriend since college.
Sarah Baker
#94. I poured some coffee into a mug that read: "I'm not gay, but my ex-boyfriend is," compliments of Peyton
Sandi Lynn
#95. He's my best friend. We were catching up. I just told him that I forgive him for sleeping with my dad for the last four years and that I'm sleeping with my cousin's boyfriend.
Kade Boehme
#96. A lot of my friends are getting married, but I don't think that is what I need. I am under no such pressure that if everybody is having a boyfriend, I too should have one.
Kangana Ranaut
#97. He might be my boyfriend. He might not be my boyfriend.
Lauren Alaina
#98. I've been really into boyfriend blazers, I like mixing tweeds with floral fabrics. The masculine and feminine look.
Milla Jovovich
#99. Fred: "Is that brick wall your boyfriend?"
Doug: "Only in my dreams."
Fred: "Oh, you too? I'm Fred."
Doug: "Doug. I should mention, in all fairness though that Christy's boyfriend is my best friend. He's the brick wall you should be worried about.
Robin Jones Gunn
#100. Someone had given Georgie a magic phone and all she'd wanted to do with it is stay up late talking to her old boyfriend. If they'd given her a proper time machine, she probably would have used it to cuddle with him. Let someone else kill Hitler.
Rainbow Rowell
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