Lish McBride Quotes

#1. So, you're telling me the zoo commissioned you to make a zombie panda in order to avoid a potential international incident.

Lish McBride

#2. Please stop, I said politely - he was that big. One should always mind one's manners around big things.

Lish McBride

#3. If you picked up the Life of Frank movie case at Scarecrow Video, the best review on the back would just say, 'Meh.

Lish McBride

#4. Aves hasn't mentioned a boyfriend," Lock chimed in, "and we're just dying to hear all about you." Liar. My friends were filthy lying sadists.

Lish McBride

#5. You're Death,' I said. 'In saddle shoes.

Lish McBride

#6. I had an affinity for pandas. Something about clumsy vegetarians struck a chord with me.

Lish McBride

#7. Sam, you need experts on this, and I love you, but - "
"I'm so new I have that new-car smell about me?

Lish McBride

#8. If you're going to think and be depressed, you might as well do it with pie, right?

Lish McBride

#9. Can you just tell them we don't need Jesus, Girl Scout cookies, or whatever the Mormons worship, and let me lie here in peace?

Lish McBride

#10. There were no windows in my bedroom, so I had to sit up and read my clock to figure out how angry I should be at my visitor. Eight A.M. I hated whoever woke me up. Had they come an hour earlier, I would have also hated their families and any household pets.

Lish McBride

#11. You know what the great thing about babies is? They are like little bundles of hope. Like the future in a basket.

Lish McBride

#12. Minion looked into the fragile belly of the duck for the third time. 'It's still not here, Master.' He shook his head in a slow, confused fashion. 'Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.

Lish McBride

#13. Fear, left unchecked, can spread like a virus.

Lish McBride

#14. Most people felt lost after high school. Sometimes I felt like I'd never really been found in the first place.

Lish McBride

#15. Sometimes life offers you up that kind of dichotomy, that soul-shearing rift of two very different things happening at once.

Lish McBride

#16. Pity. What a useless emotion when you don't act on it. Pity is supposed to trigger compassion.

Lish McBride

#17. You couldn't really tell people you weren't out performing your civic duties because you were too busy raising the dead.

Lish McBride

#18. Wind does not discriminate - it touches everyone, everything. He liked that about wind.

Lish McBride

#19. So you're the guy who did the no-no cha-cha with my baby sister.

Lish McBride

#20. What," he said slowly, "do you think you're doing here?"
"I work here." My lips felt cracked and dry all of a sudden. He tightened his grip on me and pulled me closer. Not really a place I wanted to be. I swallowed hard.
"Not here, fool. Seattle."
"I live here.

Lish McBride

#21. I didn't want to think about the fact that she could smell me, or that she just joked about eating me. At least I hoped she meant it as a joke.

Lish McBride

#22. Mrs. Winalski owned a candy-apple-red 1965 Mustang GT convertible, and she drove it like she could die at any minute and needed to get five things done before that happened.

Lish McBride

#23. But nowhere in the file had anyone said, "Oh, and by the way, he runs like a gazelle with an espresso addiction." At least not in the parts I'd skimmed.

Lish McBride

#24. Iced coffee, on a hot day, can perform miracles.

Lish McBride

#25. I had no idea what I was paying James, but based on his picnic-assembling skills alone, he needed a raise.

Lish McBride

#26. If she ran, at least her body still had motion, even if her brain was mired under responsibility.

Lish McBride

#27. Life is a series of calculated risks, James. I happen to think that this one is worth it.

Lish McBride

#28. She looked away, trying not to cry. She hated crying, and in public she hated it more.

Lish McBride

#29. That's what happens when you force someone to choose. Maybe they pick option A, maybe they pick option B, but most will go for a third option that isn't asking them to pick favorites in the first place.

Lish McBride

#30. Hey, you called me Sam. My actual name. Not Master or dumbass - "
"I have never in my life called anyone dumbass."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Now, focus.

Lish McBride

#31. I wanted to howl until I was nothing but sound.

Lish McBride

#32. Slow down and explain to us plebeians. If you have to, use sock puppets.

Lish McBride

#33. We found James standing in front of the crypt, leaning against the side nonchalantly, like it was no big deal - like he hung out in cemeteries every day. Of course, working for Douglas, he probably had.

Lish McBride

#34. I tried to take some pride where I could. If I was going to be a dropout loser, then I was going to be the best dropout loser.

Lish McBride

#35. Don't you think it's a bad sign that your best argument for your beau is that nothing has been proved in court?

Lish McBride

#36. He was not used to being at a loss. Usually, he was the gentleman with the plan. Every little detail cataloged and put in its place. But now he had no place, and the details were everywhere.

Lish McBride

#37. On top of all that, you're naked. And while I'm going to hate myself for this later, could you put on some clothes? At least just for a little while, so I can think. Then you can go right back to being naked. All the time. With my full blessing.

Lish McBride

#38. Even if Douglas was trying to sacrifice me and harvest my creepy powers at the time, I feel like killing people for doing awful things is probably setting a bad precedent for dealing with negative behavior.

Lish McBride

#39. Douglas's fridge was a stainless-steel masterpiece. I'm not that into appliances or anything, but this one was nice and probably cost more than my last apartment. I had the strange desire to hug it every time I came into the kitchen.

Lish McBride

#40. When it came to music, I was omnivorous.

Lish McBride

#41. Thanks for not talking with your fists," I said. I have a little sister, and I'm not sure I'd be as understanding with any of her boyfriends.
"I've seen you fight," he said, turning. "It would've been a terribly short conversation.

Lish McBride

#42. People often talk about the pain and degradation of being bullied. No one really talks about the cost. Not that money is more important than those other things, but having to pay the expenses of your own humiliation just rubbed rock salt into the wound.

Lish McBride

#43. Next time a talking head ended up in my easy chair, I would have all sorts of points of reference, but at that moment, I was completely at sea.

Lish McBride

#44. Despite her obvious stress, my mom still managed to pour the hot chocolate into mugs, cover them with whipped cream and a pinch of cayenne, and add a cinnamon stick to them. She was like the Jedi master of hot chocolate.

Lish McBride

#45. There'd been some nights when my fat ass had saved my ass (ba-dum-tsh).

Lish McBride

#46. I'm pretty sure you could actually grate cheese of his abs.
... I had a sudden image of him using his abs to grate my face.

Lish McBride

#47. Homework, classes, running around, and then - bam - nothing but a life of work stretching out before you. No one prepares you for that feeling or even mentions it. You just suddenly have a gap and have to decide how to fill it.

Lish McBride

#48. You have to ask it something it knew when it was alive. People don't become omniscient just because they have keeled over.

Lish McBride

#49. She whistled when she noticed my back. I assume because of my injuries. I mean, my ass just isn't that spectacular.

Lish McBride

#50. My name is Samhain Corvus LaCroix. I am a necromancer.
Now, if only I could say that with a straight face.

Lish McBride

#51. You are quite possibly the least smooth guy I know," she mumbled. "You can't even put your arm around me without tripping up.

Lish McBride

#52. Don't let your imagination run off with theirs. There is no proof that he did anything to our father. When farmers fear for their livestock, they take down every wolf indiscriminately - don't let the pack do that. Maybe someone like Sam did this, but not Sam.

Lish McBride

#53. I know you're frustrated, Sam, but the reality is you're in a world now where the majority of the people you run into will be able to snap you like a twig."
"My world was like that before.

Lish McBride

#54. I, for one, approve of Lock's new mom car. Obviously I wouldn't be caught dead owning one myself, but I like that we can transport a body and have enough cup holders for all of us.

Lish McBride