Top 100 Bad Sex Quotes
#1. All lovers are unique. Bad sex can be very thrilling for the heart.
Duncan Fallowell
#2. A lot of men are wankers cause they don't mind bad sex, but for a woman bad sex is far worse than no sex at all.
Irvine Welsh
#3. Sex is always about emotions. Good sex is about free emotions; bad sex is about blocked emotions.
Deepak Chopra
#4. There's nothing better than good sex. But bad sex? A peanut butter and jelly sandwich is better than bad sex.
Billy Joel
#5. I don't think I've ever been asked to act out bad sex. It's not my style. I've been blessed with good rhythm.
Charles Dance
#6. Life (and especially my life) is awkward and confusing and full of bad sex and spilled coffee, and those are the memories we shouldn't just throw a pretty filter over. When we neglect those imperfect moments, we miss a chance for real growth.
Greg Dybec
#7. We shouldn't sleep together. Sleeping is bad. Sex is good, sleeping together is something else.
Kristen Ashley
#9. Somebody's gotta stand up and say pubic hair is good, murder is bad. Sex is good, violence is bad.
William H. Macy
#10. There are some forms of religion that are bad, just as there's bad cooking or bad art or bad sex, you have bad religion too.
Karen Armstrong
#11. When you're younger you're so happy to get some good loving you convince yourself you're in love, can't live with out it, and chase the dick like a crack addict after the pipe, or chase the bad sex hoping something happened to the man over night and the next time it'll be good.
Jill Nelson
#12. Housework is like bad sex. Every time I do it I swear I will never do it again. Until the next time company comes.
Marilyn Sokol
#13. I can get on with someone really, really, really well ... and if they're no good at having sex with me, it really upsets me, because I think, oh God, this is someone I'd really like to spend the rest of my life with, but I cannot face having bad sex for the rest of my life.
Lily Allen
#14. I'm inspired to write songs by all kinds of things. Good sex with a good man, that might inspire a song. Bad sex - that might inspire a different kind of song.
Lady Saw
#15. Bad sex is a fuckin' myth, like a goddamned legendary creature in some fuckin' sappy fairytale.
Jenn Cooksey
#16. I want to be with you, Demetria. Go on dates, have sex and pointless arguments, figure out why you like to eat rabbit food, be the person you call first when you've had a bad day, come over and hold your hair when you're sick. How much clearer can I make this?
Genevieve Dewey
#17. People dislike Ronaldo because he's a great player, good-looking and has sex with all the ladies. They get jealous. The only bad thing about Ronaldo's life is Messi. But for him, he would've been the best player in the world for five years in a row.
Luiz Felipe Scolari
#18. In Lubbock, we grew up with two main things: God loves you and he's gonna send you to hell, and that sex is bad and dirty and nasty and awful and you should save it for the one you love.
Butch Hancock
#19. I don't know of many people who've done sex research with an eye toward people saying sex is bad for you, except for the promiscuity and cervical cancer link - which is actually a valid discovery.
Mary Roach
#20. I once read a book by a former alcoholic where she described giving oral sex to two different men, men she'd just met in a restaurant on a busy London high street. I read it and thought, I'm not that bad. This is where the bar is set.
Paula Hawkins
#21. It's always a pleasure watching you wake up," he commented. "But sometimes I wonder if you want me only for my coffee."
"Well ... " She grinned at him and sipped again. "I really like the food, too. And the sex isn't bad.
J.D. Robb
#22. Ethan possessed a skill set that combined hot, bad-boy sex god with mannerly, romantic gentleman; something so rare and captivating, I didn't have a chance at resisting the pull.
Raine Miller
#24. Love your body, love your sexuality, and realize that you are a bad human being only if you are unkind and cruel and do harm unto others and not because of your sex life.
Roxana Shirazi
#25. ( ... ) before they actually admit to the big 'L' word. Love or lust - what's the big, damn deal? You're going to fuck either way, right?
C.M. Stunich
#26. Sex and pizza, they say, are similar. When it's good, it's good. When it's bad, you get it on your shirt.
Mike Birbiglia
#27. Green Day is like sex. When we good we're really good! When we're bad ... we're still pretty damn good!
Green Day
#28. What are we do to? The child sex trade is not for us: our children are unattractive and rude, and - due to the knowledge of our history - have a bad habit of mugging prospective customers and shoving them over cliffs.
Margaret Atwood
#29. It's a given that we'll have sex. I know it sounds horrible, but I don't feel bad about it. Guys want it, and if you don't give it to them, they don't want you. I want him to want me, so sex is necessary. I just want to be wanted. Loved. After
Kathryn Perez
#30. Someone told me once that sex was like pizza; even when it was bad, it was really pretty good.
Warren Moore
#31. Law practice is the exact opposite of sex:even when it's good, it's bad.
Mortimer Zuckerman
#32. Come now," Javier said. "Sharing a bed with me isn't that bad. You've been doing it for the last week. Is the inevitable sex too distracting?
Karina Halle
#34. God, she's beautiful. I mean, look at her. She's like a volcano going off - fierce and fiery and breathtaking. If she doesn't find a way to ugly herself down, I'm going to be spending an awful lot of time pissing her off. Which might not be such a bad thing in the end. Angry sex is awesome.
Emma Chase
#35. Sex and love went together like bad boys and leather, and with Ryder, she couldn't do one without the other. She could lie to herself and say she just wanted one last night of wild sex, but her heart would surely follow her body.
Cindy Skaggs
#36. I felt terrible. The poor had a right to fuck their way through their bad dreams. Sex and drink, and maybe love, was all they had.
Charles Bukowski
#37. Cooking wasn't so bad, I thought. In fact, it was a lot like sex. Sometimes it didn't seem like such a good idea in the beginning, but then after you got into it ...
Janet Evanovich
#38. Religious ceremonial nowadays provides less opportunity for bad language and sexual symbolism.
Aubrey De Selincourt
#39. Las Vegas is a society of armed masturbators/gambling is the kicker here/sex is extra/weird trip for high rollers ... house-whores for winners, hand jobs for the bad luck crowd.
Hunter S. Thompson
#40. Religion does not stop adolescents from having sex; it only makes them feel bad about about the sex they do have.
Darrel Ray
#41. I love to write. I love it. I mean there's nothin in the world I like better, and that includes sex, probably because I'm so very bad at it.
Joss Whedon
#43. What Mae West said about sex is true about taxes. All tax cuts are good tax cuts; even bad tax cuts are good tax cuts.
Grover Norquist
#44. The moment that I realized my name was going to be said in the same sentence as children and sex, that's really intense. That's something I knew from that very moment, whatever happens past that point, something's out there in the air that is really bad.
Paul Reubens
#45. Man is always something worse or something better than an animal; and a mere argument from animal perfection never touches him at all. Thus, in sex no animal is either chivalrous or obscene. And thus no animal invented anything so bad as drunkeness - or so good as drink.
Gilbert K. Chesterton
#46. I tend to think that cricket is the greatest thing that God ever created on earth - certainly greater than sex, although sex isn't too bad either.
Harold Pinter
#48. All I want is moonlight, with you there inside of me, all night, doing it again and again. You know I want you so bad.
Toni Braxton
#49. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
George Carlin
#50. A flat tire is like a bad attitude, you won't go anywhere until you change it.
Winston Brown
#51. Bud's relationship with the female sex was governed by a gallimaufry of primal impulses, dim suppositions, deranged theories, overheard scraps of conversation, half-remembered pieces of bad advice, and fragments of no-doubt exaggerated anecdotes that amounted to rank superstition.
Neal Stephenson
#52. I've had Good and I've had Bad, and the worst I had was Wonderful!
John Valentine
#53. There had to be more to wooing a woman than feeding cattle, minding the store, tending the bar, and sex. That wasn't a bad combination in getting to know a woman, but now that he knew Jill, he wanted to hang the moon for her, make the stars brighter, and force daisies to grow from frozen ground.
Carolyn Brown
#54. I want the late-night drives, the sunset watching, the screaming, the yelling, and the crying. I know I'll definitely want the make-up sex that comes after all of the screaming and crying. I want the good, the bad, and the in-between. All of it is what's going to make us amazing together.
Gail McHugh
#55. Sports and sex and movies are not inherently bad - But for you they're addictions, not enjoyments. You use them to distract you from what you know you should do. Break free!
Dan Millman
#56. Get thee behind me, tragedy. Kneeling over her, he lifted her and impaled her gently on his sex.
Anne Rice
#57. There's an idea that the human body is somehow evil and bad and there are parts of it that are especially evil and bad, and we should be ashamed. Fear, guilt and shame are built into the attitude toward sex and the body. It's reflected in these prohibitions and these taboos that we have.
George Carlin
#58. A rugby tour is like sex. When its good it's great, and when it's bad - hey! It's still pretty good!
Peter FitzSimons
#59. I don't believe this," Diesel said. "It just gets worse and worse. Bad I enough I have to play cupid to a butcher, button maker and veterinarian ... now have to be sex therapist for a guy who gives people a rash.
Janet Evanovich
#60. You're a sex symbol," she began.
"Thanks for noticing.
Karina Bliss
#61. Well, for me, gratuitous abstinence is just as bad as gratuitous sex.
Bianca Sommerland
#62. I just think that people are so weird about nudity and the human body. Sex is not bad, naked bodies are not bad and naked bodies don't always have to be connected to sex.
Emily Browning
#63. Because I want to have sex with him
and because that's sinful
I'm blushing and flushing furiously under his scrutinizing scrutiny.
Jess C. Scott
#65. Bless the bright eyes of your sex! They never see, whether for good or bad, more than one side of any question; and that is always, the one which first presents itself to them.
Charles Dickens
#66. The two worst sins of bad taste in fiction are pornography and sentimentality. One is too much sex and the other too much sentiment.
Flannery O'Connor
#67. Me: I think we should have sex again.
Royce: Bad idea.
Me: Why?
Royce: I want more from you than sex.
Me: Goodbye, you prudish bastard.
Gena Showalter
#68. We tend to connect bad food and bad habits with romance and sex.
Marilu Henner
#70. She felt like a woman on fire. Would it be bad to have sex with Santa in the closet?
Kathleen Brooks
#71. I wonder if he ever smelt bad. Maybe if he got all sweaty. No, that wasn't a good thing to think about either. I'd seen him all sweaty as he'd covered my body with his. There was good sex, and then, there was that night.
Donna Augustine
#72. I have a bad habit of dropping verbal pellets to get a reaction, like Ursula LeGuin's "A novelist's business is lying" (that particular one got a lot of attention on Facebook), or, "Why is it that Christians hate the word 'sex'?
Chila Woychik
#73. Documentation is like sex: when it is good, it is very, very good; and when it is bad, it is better than nothing.
Dick Brandon
#74. He stares at the them, mid mouthful. 'Please,' he says, after he's swallowed. 'It's bad enough that the middle-aged are having sex, without thinking of my aunt doing it. And I don't know why someone just doesn't tell Sam to use a condom instead of impregnating the women of the inner-west.
Melina Marchetta
#75. I've always been attracted to jerks. They range from sassy weirdos who are ultimately pretty good guys to sociopathic sex addicts, but the common denominator is a bad attitude upon first meeting and a desire to teach me a lesson.
Lena Dunham
#76. There are two differences between an orgy and a sex club. First, at a sex club it's considered bad form to introduce yourself to someone before you start putting parts of his body in your mouth. At an orgy you are allowed to offer your name as long as you do so with an obvious sense of irony.
Joel Derfner
#77. We can spend our lives letting the world tell us who we are. Sane or insane. Saints or sex addicts. Heroes or victims. Letting history tell us how good or bad we are. Letting our past decide our future. Or we can decide for ourselves. And maybe it's our job to invent something better.
Chuck Palahniuk
#78. I think if our new direction in all our relationships is friendship, compassion, and enjoyment, we will easily be able to break our old cycle of bad habits and develop something deeper and more meaningful
Evan Sutter
#79. Masturbation is a meditation on self-love. So many of us are afflicted with self-loathing, bad body images, shame about our body functions, and confusion about sex and pleasure, I recommend an intense love affair with yourself
Betty Dodson
#80. Sex to a woman can be like a bad emotion or imbalanced hormones, if you can't get a handle on it, it'll have you walking around mixed up and messed up, happy one moment and inthe next plotting to kill somebody
value ypur goodies and know who you giving them to.
Jacqueline Ewing
#81. I think these pipe-smokers oughta just move to the next level and go ahead and suck a dick. There's nothing wrong with suckin' dicks. Men do it, women do it; can't be all bad if everybody's doin' it. I say, Drop the pipe, and go to the dick! That's my advice. I'm here to help.
George Carlin
#82. It's dangerous and dirty and smells bad and
"
"Yeah, well, so is sex and drugs and everything else worth doing.
Lili St. Crow
#83. Tax cuts are like sex: When they are good, they are very, very good. And when they are bad, they are still pretty good.
M. Stanton Evans
#84. Sex is a bad thing because it rumples the clothes.
Jackie Kennedy
#85. Stephanie's vaginal teeth scrape against him as she makes love to him. Kevin cringes as she presses her messy head wound against his cheek. He doesn't enjoy the sex. It feels like he's getting a really bad blowjob from a girl with big teeth and a small mouth.
Carlton Mellick III
#86. A man who wouldn't cheat for a poke don't want one bad enough.
Augustus "Gus" McCrae
Larry McMurtry
#87. The man was rude, crude, and inappropriate. I was taken with him the moment I walked in the door, and I knew the first moment I saw him that it was going to be raw, it was going to be ugly, and I was going to enjoy every damn minute of it.
C.M. Stunich
#88. That mouth. Smoking was a bad habit, yes. But he looked so good doing it.
Michelle Hodkin
#89. Emma pursed her lips thoughtfully. "Okay, here's a really bad analogy for you. Aidan is like the Indy 500 of Sex, and I need someone who is more - "
"Bumper cars?" Casey asked.
"I was going to say the slow lane, smartass.
Katie Ashley
#90. Sex accounts for about 40 percent of your relationship, but if it's bad, then it's 60.
Joe Manganiello
#91. When I was writing Green Girl,I was reading Simone de Beauvoir's The Second Sex, and she's very dismissive of the young girl. She writes about the girl as being from this space of bad faith and blankness. I'm more interested in a messy space.
Kate Zambreno
#92. Long ago life was clean, sex was bad and obscene, and the rich were so mean. Stately homes for the Lords, croquet lawns, village greens, Victoria was my queen.
Ray Davies
#93. Well, then why should we do anything more than once? Should I just smoke this one cigarette? Maybe we should only have sex once, if it's the same thing. Should we just watch one sunset? Or live just one day? Because it's new every time. Each time is a different experience.
Jane Margolis
#94. I don't like good kids being corrupted by bad ones, Santa never does".
The Santa Killer
Stuart Francis
#95. Sex standing up and walking on sand will bring any man to a bad end. He
Andrea Camilleri
#96. When you're having sex again, it makes you wonder why you weren't before. What could possibly have been bad enough to make you stop doing THAT?
Matthew Norman
#97. Prostitution is the supreme triumph of capitalism. When the sex war is won prostitutes should be shot as collaborators for their terrible betrayal of all women, for the moral tarring and feathering they give indigenous women who have had the bad luck to live in what they make their humping ground.
Julie Burchill
#98. Early moralists who believed that taking too much pleasure at the table led inexorably to bad character-or worse, to sex-were (in the best-case scenario, anyway) absolutely right.
Anthony Bourdain
#99. As far as we know, there is no corresponding taste among women for erotica featuring multiple overweight middle-aged ladies with cheap tattoos, bad haircuts, and black socks having sex with one hot guy. Go figure.
Christopher Ryan
#100. When sex is good theres nothing better, when its bad its not bad.
Bill Maher