Old Grandma Quotes

#1. It looks like my grandma's old VW Rabbit after the Berlin Wall fell on it. Twice.

Cecily White

#2. Aren't you something," Grandma said. "I never saw a midget up close."
"Little person," Briggs said. "And I never saw anyone as old as you up close, either.

Janet Evanovich

#3. If becoming a grandmother was only a matter of choice, I should advise every one of you straight away to become one. There is no fun for old people like it!

Hannah Whitall Smith

#4. We're having Thanksgiving at our place," he said. "An old-fashioned Thanksgiving." "With drag queens and hookers and cranberry sauce?" I asked breathlessly. "Just like at Grandma's," he replied.

Josh Kilmer-Purcell

#5. My mom has a tape from when I was, like, 2 years old, talking with my grandma, telling her a story that's really elaborate about werewolves and wolves.

Amanda Hocking

#6. In a town in Calabria, a long time ago, there lived an old lady everyone called Strega Nona, which meant "Grandma Witch".

Tomie DePaola

#7. The MAX made a stop in Old Town. Grandma nudged me with her purse. "This is where we get off." I followed her from the MAX down an alley between a strip club and a Chinese restaurant. What? Your grandma doesn't hang out in places like that too?

Stacey Wallace Benefiel

#8. I have to tell you, my seven-year-old granddaughter said to my daughter, her mother, 'So what's the big deal about Grandma Maddy having been Secretary of State? Only girls are Secretaries of State.' Most of her lifetime, it's true. But at the time it really was a big deal.

Madeleine Albright

#9. My 93-year-old grandma is a beautiful example of healthy living. She laughs a lot and always says, 'Just be yourself!' She also eats dessert every single day.

Rachel Boston

#10. A grandma is old on the outside and young on the inside.

John Wright

#11. So many people are busy working now, but we need to go back to the old days when grandma and the neighbors helped raise the children, and we were all the better for it.

Kym Whitley

#12. When Grandma Mazur is talking about the reason for the improved play of her 91-year-old bowling teammate, she said:
She's doing better now that we got her the longer tubing to her oxygen tank.

Janet Evanovich

#13. Our family's special holiday tradition is going over to my grandparent's house on Christmas morning. My grandma cooks a big breakfast, and I love hearing her tell old funny stories.

Caroline Sunshine

#14. Grandma, how old is she?"
"Oh I don't know." Grandma said. "You'd have to cut off her head and count the rings in her neck.

Richard Peck

#15. My grandmother used to babysit us when I was younger, and would always play old-school music. It gets to me. Grandma had some good taste.

Virgil Green

#16. Remember that the old lady who's taking forever in line is someone's grandma

Eric Stonestreet

#17. An old western standoff had nothing on the looks that my mom and grandma were exchanging. A tumbleweed could have rolled through the kitchen and neither would have noticed.

Lani Woodland

#18. A grandparent is old on the outside but young on the inside. If your baby is "beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time," you're the grandma.

Teresa Bloomingdale

#19. Grandma shrugged. "Framed. A man that pretty can't be a murderer." Mother stared at her. "Penelope, I'm seventy-two years old. You let me enjoy my fantasy.

Ilona Andrews

#20. My grandma Ruthie, Jettie's sister, had been married four times, so many times I started calling every old man I saw at the grocery store Grandpa.

Molly Harper

#21. My parents were out of town and sent me to stay at my grandma's house. That's where I learned how to make pancakes. I served them to all the old ladies who lived on her block. After the meal, they each left a $5 bill next to their plates. I thought, 'Hey, I'm onto something here.'

Bill Rancic

#22. Soon I will be an old, white-haired lady, into whose lap someone places a baby, saying, "Smile, Grandma!" - I, who myself so recently was photographed on my grandmother's lap.

Liv Ullmann

#23. If we got caught being in grandma's smaller room without her or without another adult being there, we were surely in for a good old-fashioned ass whipping, Kunta Kinte style. Grandma Bertha didn't play that shit.

Amina

#24. Usually I wear my grandma's old aprons, or others I have collected in my travels. When I was young, I would sit and watch my grandma prepare stuff. She wasn't Italian, but she did really good Italian food.

Debi Mazar

#25. I always wanted to eat with a Negro," Grandma said.
Yeah, well I always wanted to eat with a boney-assed old white woman," Lula said. "So I guess this works out good.

Janet Evanovich

#26. I look to the heavens for an answer, and do you know what I get?A raindrop in the eye.But the real treat is waiting for me in the ballroom, where Great Grandma is in the process of removing every last stitch of her clothing. It's time for her bath, she says.Wow. Naked old woman flesh kills .

Nicole Christie

#27. I don't want just 25-year-old girls watching my show. I want Grandma, Grandpa and Mom and Dad and the kids. I just want everyone to hear good music.

Drake Bell

#28. Carson is an old family name, though my grandma used to watch Johnny all the time and was crazy about him.

Carson Daly

#29. Grandma kept turning around in the front seat of their old Fiat saying, "Look at you girls! On, Lena, you are a beauty!"
Lena seriously wished she would stop saying that, because it was irritating, and besides, how was cranky Effie supposed to feel?

Ann Brashares

#30. Given that there is every indication I'll be checking the single box on all official forms from now until I'm dead, hopefully at the ripe old age of 98 like Grandma Sanders, an unreasonable number of cats seems to be the next logical step in my life.

Lindsey Stuffel

#31. Humans are born, weak and helpless. We're cursed with natural predators called parents. That's why the grandma was created. To protect us. Oh sure, she's old and frail. But she can kick your dad's ass.

Christopher Titus