Not Happy Wife Quotes

#1. You should get married. When I was younger, I was into the fame and fortune, and now I realize that a loving wife and happy children - that's life's greatest consolation prize.

Emo Philips

#2. What were you doing in there?" she asked, unwilling to let it go.
... "Jacking off, naturally." She narrowed her eyes but seemed to be happy with that answer. Good to know. She was going to make a fabulous wife.

Karina Halle

#3. I have a ridiculously beautiful wife who's super sexy, and as long as she's happy with me, I don't need to look in the mirror and think, "How do I stack up next to Bradley Cooper? Would Cooper rock this shirt?" Doesn't matter. He does not have your wife. You do.

Nick Offerman

#4. My wife and I were happy for 20 years. Then we met.

Rodney Dangerfield

#5. I'm happy in Madrid, my kids are happy and my wife is happy, so everything's good. If anyone knows about contracts they take a while to sort out.

David Beckham

#6. I have little patience with anyone who is not self-satisfied. I am always pleased to see my friends, happy to be with my wife and family, but the high spot of every day is when I first catch a glimpse of myself in the shaving mirror.

Robert Morley

#7. I believe I've got the best of both worlds - a modern man with old fashioned values. I'm happy to be a house husband but won't let my wife carry her own bag.

Ian Watson

#8. My wife Staci made me go to a wedding last weekend ... If it weren't for her, I'd be happy.

Stephan Pastis

#9. As Matt walked Rick outside, he whispered, "Don't forget my little secret." He wiggled his eyebrows. "A happy wife. A happy life. Got it?"
Rick nodded. "Got it.

Linda Weaver Clarke

#10. I don't have a mortgage, I don't have a wife and I don't have kids, so I'm quite happy bumbling along.

Rory McCann

#11. I'm happy because - I'm not doing anything deceitful, I think, to my family. I'm successful because I don't have to sleep with one of my friends' girlfriends or wife or something. That's why I'm successful, that's success to me. I'm not dead, I'm not in the gutter - that's success to me.

Mike Tyson

#12. I have so much satisfaction in my life. I have a beautiful wife and the great stimulation of an interesting career. I'm the most happy fellow that I know.

Brendan Fraser

#13. Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.

Lyndon B. Johnson

#14. It's most dangerous nowadays for a husband to pay any attention to his wife in public. It always makes people think that he beats her when they are alone. The world has grown so suspicious of anything that looks like a happy married life.

Oscar Wilde

#15. In the career of female fame, there are few prizes to tie obtained which can vie with the obscure state of a beloved wife or a happy mother.

Jane Porter

#16. All means marry. If you get a good wife, you will become happy. If you get a bad one, you will become a philosopher.

Preeti Shenoy

#17. It's tough for those celebrity couples. It's really hard. My wife wasn't in the limelight, which made it easier ... the key is to keep it happy, light, and fun.

Joey Fatone

#18. I've been in perfect health and perfectly happy all my life. I don't take any pills; I just get up, clean up after my wife, and start typing every day.

T.C. Boyle

#19. I have my own worries and concerns and frustrations, but I'm doing something I love to do. My wife and kids are in good shape. What is there not to be happy about?

Chris O'Donnell

#20. Once you've married, be strict but just with your wife, don't allow her to forget herself, and when a misunderstanding arises, say: Don't forget that I made you happy.

Anton Chekhov

#21. It is good that a man should have his wife close at hand. It makes the spirit happy and guards against insanity.

Tony D'Souza

#22. Not even in a movie had I ever seen a wife with a journey of her own. Marriage was always the happy end, not the beginning. It was the 1950s, and I confused growing up with settling down.

Gloria Steinem

#23. To count a few gulls makes the journey happy.
In the reedy bend, under the willow bank,
My wife and children smile with me.
The moment I fall asleep, wind and waves are quiet;
No glory, no disgrace, and not a single worry.

Wu Cheng'en

#24. I dipped into his brain. He wasn't happy that I wasn't wearing a bra, because my boobs distracted him. He was thinking I was a bit too curvy for his taste. He was thinking he'd better not think about me that way anymore. He was missing his wife.

Charlaine Harris

#25. He who look at a woman who is not his wife as a mother; wealth that is not his as dust and all the men as himself ... is a happy man. He, who sees all these things under a different light, is a blind.

Chanakya

#26. I wish to go with you, not as man and wife, but merely as friends, travel companions, the sort of happy-go-lucky chums about whom rollicking old ballads of the road are written.

Alex Flinn

#27. I'm with someone who makes me incredibly happy. I'm not one of those people who subscribes to the idea that marriage takes the romance out of things. I think it gets better, it deepens. I love being a wife. We have a blast.

Emily Blunt

#28. Try to find something that makes you happy. Your life is not going to get easier once Queen Levana is your wife. If you had even one small thing that brought you happiness, or hope that things could someday be better, then maybe that would be enough to sustain you.

Marissa Meyer

#29. Who make not friends with sinful, lives not away from hope futilely,
Who outrages not another's wife and betrays not arrogance surely;
Who never commits any theft or never shows ingratitude certainly,
And never indulges in drinking is a person who is always happy.
[99] - 33 Mahatma Vidur

Munindra Misra

#30. A woman should say: 'Have I made him happy? Is he satisfied? Does he love me more than he loved me before? Is he likely to go to bed with another woman?' If he does, then it's the wife's fault because she is not trying to make him happy.

Barbara Cartland

#31. As long as it makes you happy. For the rest of my life, I will do whatever it takes to ensure it. As my wife, you will not want for anything. What you desire, I will provide.

Renee Vincent

#32. We live in a flat; my wife would be happy if we had a house with stairs. Or a little cottage in the country.

Fergus Henderson

#33. I had to be naked [in Vinyl], but I was almost more nervous about having to be drunk. The director wasn't going to yell, "Too big!," during the nude scene. For the drunk scene, you can be bad drunk or good drunk. We'll see. My wife was not happy, hearing about it.

Ray Romano

#34. Let us say your wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend makes you happy. If they leave, you're bound to be unhappy. You are the slave of the thing that makes you happy. You are a junkie and human relationships can be expensive habits.

Frederick Lenz

#35. Jay became an adult. He got a job, married a wife, and they had a child. Now he had so many things to take care! Like all other grown ups, he talked more of being busy than of being happy. He completely forgot the little bird singing beautiful songs in his heart.

Ilchi Lee

#36. Growing up, I used to watch 'Happy Days,' 'Laverne & Shirley,' 'All in the Family.' Those were the shows I watched growing up with my family. And, believe it or not, 'McMillan and Wife' and 'Columbo.'

Mark Pellegrino

#37. I had a realization in the midst of my happy marriage that I had kind of lost most of my friends - my male friends in particular. And I started wondering if my wife, who was certainly my best friend, supplanted those relationships.

Matthew Weiner

#38. I've won a lot of times with my wife and son here, and I've won solo. I don't think there's a formula for when the come out and when they don't I'm simply happy to win.

Vijay Singh

#39. Happiness does not come from football awards. It's terrible to correlate happiness with football. Happiness comes from a good job, being able to feed your wife and kids. I don't dream football, I dream the American dream - two cars in a garage, be a happy father.

Barry Sanders

#40. Let's just say I can never be cast again after Ron Swanson. Then I have a life of theater and woodworking and my wife to look forward to, and that doesn't make me anything but very happy.

Nick Offerman

#41. If I tell a man he needs to quit his soul-sucking job, he has to go home and fight with his wife or fight with his parents and fight with his in-laws and fight with everybody, because men aren't supposed to be happy; they're supposed to do well.

Martha Beck

#42. A wife's faithful to her husband, subject to him. It's in the bible.

Elmore Leonard

#43. He knew that his father had finally run hard enough and long enough to wear down the frontiers between the worlds, he had run clear out of his skin and into the arms of his wife, to whom he had proved, once and for all, the superiority of his love. Some migrants are happy to depart.

Salman Rushdie

#44. My mission is not to make him happy and bear his children and be his wife. My mission is to kill him.

Amy Engel

#45. Maybe he'd been mistaken, trying so hard to make his wife and young children happy. Maybe it's always a mistake, trying to assure the happiness of others.

Joyce Carol Oates

#46. I mean, I'm happy to see you, but why aren't you home?"
"Wherever my wife sleeps is my home.

Olivia Parker

#47. This would be a perfect day if Ray were here with us, but he's not far away. He's doing well, and I know he'd like to enjoy yourself, Ana. To all of you, thank you for coming to share my beautiful wife's birthday, the first of many to come. Happy birthday, my love. - Christian Grey

E.L. James

#48. Valentine's day has gotten blown way out of proportion. Valentine's Day just used to be for your girlfriend or your wife but now everyone's like 'Oh, happy valentine's day!' I even got a Valentine's Day card from my grandmother. How ridiculous is that? We stopped having sex years ago!

Greg Giraldo

#49. My wife and I were never happy here. Spain can be narrow-minded, and provincial. In LA you don't have to justify yourself. I think I will leave here again soon and move back there.

Carlos Ruiz Zafon

#50. Happy wife, happy life. I think every man learns that quick. Really quick.

Chad Kroeger

#51. How happy is the sailor's life, from coast to coast to roam; in every port he finds a wife, in every land a home.

Isaac Bickerstaffe

#52. A man who is a good lover to his wife is his children's best friend. ... Child care is play to a woman who is happy. And only a man can make a woman happy. In deepest truth, a father's first duty to his children is to make their mother feel fulfilled as a woman.

Barbara Ehrenreich

#53. I would love to have the power to be the just eternally perfect husband so my wife would always be happy; that would take me to heaven if I could figure that one out.

Robert Knepper

#54. My wife is the boss at home, and my daughters are the bosses. I am just the worker. We are a very warm family and very happy.

Jet Li

#55. I like it in Manchester. I thought it was going to be much colder, but it is not too bad. And my wife and son are happy here, too.

Sergio Aguero

#56. My wife is very happy about me keeping all my music in my pocket.

Craig Finn

#57. Can the believing husband in Heaven be happy with his unbelieving wife in Hell? Can the believing father in Heaven be happy with his unbelieving children in Hell? Can the loving wife in Heaven be happy with her unbelieving husband in Hell? I tell.

Jonathan Edwards

#58. Recipe for a happy marriage: My wife and I always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

Red Skelton

#59. I would watch the remaining 12 or so episodes of 'Breaking Bad' I haven't seen by noon tomorrow, but my wife would kill me. I watched all five seasons of 'The Wire' in a month, and she was not happy about it.

D. B. Weiss

#60. The myth of 'You have to be a tortured artist' is a myth," says Lin. "You can have a happy, healthy life and still go to all these crazy dark places in your writing, and then go play with your child and hug your wife.

Jeremy McCarter

#61. She expressed an opinion that the happiness of a woman in Paradise is beneath the soles of her husband's feet,' he enlightened humorously, seemingly not at all averse to her obvious desire to be comforted.

Margaret Rome

#62. I am tired of all these golfers who are happy with second place. The only one who will like you if you come in second place is your wife and your dog. And that is only if you have a good wife and a good dog.

Gary Player

#63. My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

#64. Zach kissed her forehead. I'm not going to let anything like that happen to you again. You're going to live out your days as the cosseted and cherished wife of a chief deputy U.S. Marshal.

Pamela Clare

#65. Winning is the only thing that makes me happy. Ask my wife. I don't get happy about anniversaries or birthdays. I don't care about that. Just winning.

Jeff Kent

#66. They had stood against all adversity to be together, and now they would forge their own path to love. She would be Kai's wife. She would be the Commonwealth's empress. And she had every intention of being blissfully happy for ever, ever after.

Marissa Meyer

#67. Man up and settle down. The sooner a man can gain control, identify his wife, and be faithful to her, the more successful, and happy you will be in life. Being with one woman in a faithful relationship will cause you to be the happiest version of yourself.

Tony Gaskins

#68. I am happy! I'm leaving on a trip and my wife is staying in Bulgaria.

Ivan Slavkov

#69. I would rather be a fairly happy wife and mother.

Mary MacLane

#70. To be happy, a man must love his wife as she chooses to be loved.

Honore De Balzac

#71. If I win, I'll take my wife and buy her a whole new wardrobe. If she's happy then I'll be happy.

Chris Daughtry

#72. It is hard for me to believe that any husband and wife are really happy together. And to have thee say you are is an unspeakable comfort.

Hannah Whitall Smith

#73. I think there are pluses and minuses to being simpleminded. The minus is not having any sort of vision for the future. But on the plus side, my wife and I have really been happy through all of the ups and downs.

Ty Burrell

#74. I had a happy marriage and a nice wife. I accomplished everything you can. What more can you want?

Max Schmeling

#75. I, Kotoko Aihara ... Now Kotoko Irie ... have finally become Irie-kun's wife. And though this may seem like a happy ending, it is actually more of a happy beginning.

Kaoru Tada

#76. Happy is that family where both the husband and wife are mutual members of Christ's body

William Gouge

#77. We owe it to our husband or wife, our fellow workers, our children, our friends, indeed to everyone who comes into our lives, to be as happy as we can be.

Dennis Prager

#78. She put on her lace collar. She put on her new hat and he never noticed; and he was happy without her.

Virginia Woolf

#79. Happy wife, happy life.

Paul Orfalea

#80. I made an impulse buy of a house in Maine to make my wife happy and now have gone back into debt and it's all started over for me.

John Hodgman

#81. Being a wife and a mother is very gratifying, but it's not a creative expression and that's something I need to be happy.

Genie Francis

#82. I've been sober for two-and-a-half years, My children are happy. In August, my wife and I will celebrate our fifteenth wedding anniversary. My band is back together with a sold-out tour.

Trey Anastasio