I Will Eat You Baby Quotes

#1. I used to walk into a party and scan the room for attractive women. Now I look for women to hold my baby so I can eat potato salad sitting down.

Paul Reiser

#2. I fuckin eat silence of crickets for fun. I got life after
life and a name like Baby. Every time I try to cry a tear
a new kittenhead grows out of me.

Patricia Lockwood

#3. The only legitimate excuse you could have for having a baby in those dire, war torn, famine struck conditions - would be to eat it.

Doug Stanhope

#4. The whole world always burns," said Loaf. "Or it floods. Or some insect eats the crop and you starve. Or a disease ravages the wallfold, killing nine out of ten, and the survivors eat the dead. Every baby you have dies eventually, no matter what you do. Yet we have babies and we try to go on.

Orson Scott Card

#5. (Talon pulled another beignet from the sack and held it up for her to eat.)
That stuff is hazardous to your health. (Sunshine)
Baby, life is hazardous to your health. (Talon)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#6. I eat vegetarian a lot. I buy only fresh ingredients and cook from scratch - that way, when I feel like snacking and look in my fridge, it's: 'Oh, baby carrots or chocolate soy pudding. Take your pick.'

Nadia Giosia

#7. When I was a baby I had no teeth. I couldn't get a job and I couldn't eat meat.

Bobcat Goldthwait

#8. You know, you the worst kind, you want to marry the artist and live like squalor, but you wait, in five years you be like, Baby Jake why we eat ramen noodles every night? You a hustler, don't blind me, I see.

Stephanie Danler

#9. Eating a peach is like eating a newborn baby's head. In that it's all soft and fuzzy. Not that peaches taste like babies. I don't eat babies. Or peaches, actually. Because they remind me of eating babies. Vicious circle, really.

Jenny Lawson

#10. Hawke didn't bother to respond to that - he'd eat the baby cat alpha for breakfast.

Nalini Singh

#11. Colette picked up a piece of the bread and stared at it suspiciously. "This toast feels raw," she said. "Is it safe to eat raw toast?" "Of course not," Hugo said. "I bet that baby is trying to poison us." "Actually,

Lemony Snicket

#12. I used to imagine the spider creeping down, crawling into my mouth, sliding down my throat, and laying loads of eggs in my belly. The Baby spiders would hatch after a while and eat me alive, from the inside out

Darren Shan

#13. What do you do for fun in this town?
Well, you know. Wash dishes. Wipe up baby drool, put a new quart of oil in him once in a while. Watch the Weather Channel to see if any of the neighbors have been blown away by a tornado. Eat too much cheese and get cheese farts.
Keeps you busy, huh?

Nick Wilgus

#14. Paris Hilton is one of the hosts for Nicole Richie's baby shower, and they're serving sushi. Awesome, Paris - sushi, the one thing pregnant women are forbidden to eat. Thanks for the mercury.

Chelsea Handler

#15. A baby-sitter is a teenager who gets two dollars an hour to eat five dollars' worth of your food.

Henny Youngman