Top 100 Cow Quotes
#2. I write in order to attain that feeling of tension relieved and function achieved, which a cow enjoys on giving milk.
H.L. Mencken
#3. Ever consider what pets must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul - chicken, pork, half a cow. They must think we're the greatest hunters on earth!
Anne Tyler
#4. Forty minutes later, I leaned back in my chair, and looked at the thousand or so pages of manuscript towering on my desk. It hit me. Holy cow. This author had total control over this book. Total. And it was one of seven. One. Of. Seven.
Carla Bolte
#5. It is remarkable what fine hands men of genius write, even when they are as awkward in all other uses of the hand as a cow with a musket.
Sara Coleridge
#6. To give your sheep or cow a large, spacious meadow is the way to control him.
Shunryu Suzuki
#7. Lobsters one of the only animals that have to put up with being alive in the restaurant. If you go to a steakhouse, folks - no cow tank.
Richard Jeni
#8. My feeling is, we ran from animals for three million years. It's our time now. If a cow could eat you, it would. And it wouldn't care how comfortable your truck ride over was, either.
Greg Proops
#9. Purple Cow (SETH GODIN) - Your Highlight on page 68 | location 1042-1042 | Added on Friday, 6 June 2014 10:00:32 Assume that what was remarkable last time won't be remarkable this time. ==========
Anonymous
#10. It's all right to pull the cow out of the mud on Sunday, provided that you don't push him in on Saturday night.
Harold B. Lee
#11. It is important to use
your hands, that is what distinguishes
you from a cow or a computer operator.
Paul Rand
#12. Jenny felt that her education was merely a polite way to bide time, as if she were really a cow, being prepared only for the insertion of the device for artificial insemination. Her
John Irving
#13. Cow protection to me is one of the most wonderful phenomena in the human evolution.
Mahatma Gandhi
#14. Do you ride?"
She smiled, her fingers lightly sliding around his ear. "Not since I hit that barn"
Zach's hands paused on her flesh. "You hit a barn?"
"I had to avoid the cow
Shelly Laurenston
#15. We have travelled a long distance from the cow with a bucket of raw milk under its udder. We are a long way from home.' This
Deborah Levy
#16. Steller's sea cow, named after the German naturalist Georg Steller, who discovered a small community of them living on Bering Island, off the coat of Siberia, in 1741. Hunted mercilessly by humans, within thirty years of its discovery by Steller this remarkable species was extinct.
Bill Bryson
#17. Every species, human and subhuman, has some distinguishing mark, so that you can tell a man from a beast, or a dog from a cow.
Mahatma Gandhi
#18. Green tea?"
"You can't be serious."
The old woman nodded her approval. "I wasn't."
"Because you know when a cow chews grass? And he or she chews and chews and chews? Well, green tea tastes like French-kissing that cow after it's done chewing all that grass.
David Levithan
#19. Science is not a sacred cow-but there are a large number of would-be sacred cowherds busily devoting quantities of time, energy and effort to the task of making it one, so they can be sacred cowherds.
John W. Campbell
#20. A painting is more than the sum of its parts,' he would tell me, and then go on to explain how the cow by itself is just a cow, and the meadow by itself is just grass and flowers, and the sun peeking through the trees is just a beam of light, but put them all together and you've got magic.
Wendelin Van Draanen
#21. Cheese, where you takes liquid from a cow lady's business parts, mix it with a bit o' juices from a baby cow's fourth stomach and then let it grow all fuzzy-moldy for a few years, eh?
Jeffery Russell
#22. I don't know what Alex did to piss this poisonous cow off, but now I want blood.
Cheree Smith
#23. Parties who want milk should not seat themselves on a stool in the middle of the field in hope that the cow will back up to them.
Elbert Hubbard
#24. I don't want any vegetables, thank you. I paid for the cow to eat them for me.
Douglas Coupland
#25. He hated YouTube. He wishes it would die of mad cow disease.
Andrea Speed
#26. It's no good crying over spilt milk; all we can do is bail up another cow
Ben Chifley
#28. I was an "Omnivore." Like a lot of people, I didn't know any better. Then I read a couple of books. One of them was called How Chickens Are Raped Before You Eat Them. Another was called Hotdogs and Fingertips. I also read The Cow Feces Dilemma as well as Barf, STDs and Veal.
Demetri Martin
#29. I'd rather eat a cow-pat on a bun than a bloody McDonalds.
Alex Kapranos
#30. Then a neighbor, Mr Smith, had a dairy cow and an couple bulls. He showed me how to bluff a bull.
Jim Fowler
#31. Moo may represent an idea, but only the cow knows.
Mason Cooley
#32. I want a horse and plough, Chickens too, Just one cow, With a wistful moo.
Noel Coward
#33. Bessie- A man picking out a wife is like asking a cow to pick out a farmer.
Margaret Brownley
#34. People have SMS, right? It stinks. It's a dead technology, like a fax machine left over from the Seventies, sitting there as a cash cow for carriers.
Jan Koum
#35. Polite Conversation Why, everyone one as they like; as the good woman said when she kissed her cow.
Jonathan Swift
#36. Many of the presidents have sworn themselves in to similarly foolish titles: Governor of Cow Pastures, Commanding General of Standing Chickens.
Karen Russell
#37. without warning, the thermometer disappeared from my fingers. Some sudden suction had drawn it inside the cow. I ran my fingers round just inside the rectum - nothing; I pushed my hand inside without success; with a feeling of rising panic I rolled up my sleeve and groped about in vain.
James Herriot
#38. I would like to thank the incomparable William H. Macy for taking a chunky 22-year-old with a bad perm and glasses out into a cow pasture and kissing me and making me his wife.
Felicity Huffman
#39. There are idle spots on every farm, and every highway is bordered by an idle strip as long as it is; keep cow, plow, and mower out of these idle spots, and the full native flora, plus dozens of interesting stowaways from foreign parts, could be part of the normal environment of every citizen.
Aldo Leopold
#40. Sure, I'd love to beat Notre Dame, don't get me wrong. But nothing matters more than beating that cow college on the other side of the state!
Bear Bryant
#41. Mother cow is in many ways better than the mother who gave us birth.
Mahatma Gandhi
#42. A new cologne is coming out. It's for cowboys, and it's made from cow's manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!
Bill Maher
#43. But why, she thought wryly, did a man seem more attractive as he became less available? How humbling to think one had so much in common with a cow stretching its neck through a gate for better grass.
Mary Jo Putney
#44. The TSA must think we're mushrooms. You know, the way they are trying to keep us in the dark, and the way they keep feeding us a fertilizing agent that comes from the south end of a north-bound cow.
Douglas Wilson
#45. I got a cow that went dry and a hen that won't lay, a big stack of bills that gets bigger each day.
Ray Charles
#46. You oughtn't to go in swimming when you're alone," Freddy said. "You might have drowned." "I suppose I might have, at that," said the cow. "But it's such fun when I think I'm going to float, and then I just sink.
Walter R. Brooks
#47. Mint-street and Kent-street--those old plague-spots that disgrace and disfigure the fair face of the Borough of Southwark--teem with blackguardism and vice; but here, too, you find that the birds who here flock are strictly of a feather. Cow-cross,
Henry Mayhew
#48. Life has got a habit of not standing hitched. You got to ride it like you find it. You got to change with it. If a day goes by that don't change some of your old notions for new ones, that is just about like trying to milk a dead cow.
Woody Guthrie
#49. An odor of June mud, backwashed with essence of meadow-grass and a whiff of cow.
Gregory Maguire
#50. I do believe sometimes discipline is very important. I'm not just lying around like a lazy cow all the time.
Bjork
#51. Growing up in eastern Turkey, I was not really involved with the family business - sheep and cow farming, yogurt and cheese making. But I think I learned from my father the unspoken business language or instincts that go back thousands of years.
Hamdi Ulukaya
#52. If you want milk, don't sit on a stool in the middle of a field in the hope that a cow will back up to you.
Richard Branson
#53. Now from where I sit this whole thing smells like its downwind from a cow barn on a hot June day!
Waylon Jennings
#54. Behind the semi-elliptical bar four cowboys who had never been near a cow sang western songs which sounded as if they had originated in the far east.
Ross Macdonald
#55. Driving most supercars is like trying to manhandle a cow up a back staircase, but this is like smearing honey onto Keira Knightley.
Jeremy Clarkson
#56. First of all, you're improvising through a puppet, so you're not always yourself: you're a cow or you're a pig or you're an old woman, you know, whatever puppet you pick, or you're a demon, you know, whatever you pick up, that's what you get to be in the scene.
Brian Henson
#57. She said that what was in the past was best left there and that talking about it was like stirring a fresh cow pile with a wooden spoon. Didn't accomplish a thing, and only made the stink and the flies worse and the spoon useless for anything else. Then
Carolyn Brown
#58. On the third day of their honeymoon, infamous environmental activist Stewie Woods and his new bride, Annabel Bellotti, were spiking trees in the forest when a cow exploded and blew them up. Until then, their marriage had been happy.
C.J. Box
#60. The young were all fleeing the countryside to work in the city. Nobody seemed to want to live any more between the soil and the cow pats. [Italy in 1960s]
Marco Vichi
#61. Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.
Ambrose Bierce
#62. Heifer cow is better than none, but this is no time for puns
Groucho Marx
#63. I was thinking about the cow thing. About how hanging on to an ex-boyfriend is like chewing your cud until somebody drops a fresh bale of hay in front of you. Or something like that.
Dandi Daley Mackall
#64. Dogma is less useful than cow dung. One can make whatever one likes out of it, even revisionism ...
Mao Zedong
#65. Annie Taliaferro had that hammerhead look about her, like a breachy range cow, or a bunch-quitting steer.
Clifton Adams
#66. Change is like a charging cow. Don't ignore it - milk it
Andrew Leigh
#67. You are making me something, cow-woman, or is that just make believe and pretend, like your sex life?'
'I'm making you a gag, Mickey, so I can knit in fucking peace.
Amy Lane
#68. All anyone really needs to know about barbed wire is that it can tear the arse out of your trousers, give a cow a good fright, entangle a Yorkshire terrier for life, and is nasty stuff made by greedy men.
Billy Connolly
#69. The crop always seems better in our neighbor's field, and our neighbor's cow gives more milk.
Ovid
#70. You are not a cow, and I am no apostle of cud chewing.
Irvin D. Yalom
#71. Parties that ended with stabbing weren't part of the long term plan. Neither was being tied to a man in prison, working as a stripper, or worrying about whether or not I was safe without a goddamned brand across my back like a fucking cow.
Joanna Wylde
#72. There's a Buddhist story about the guy who wants to be enlightened, and then he gets a cow and a wife and a child, and all these things get in the way of his enlightenment. So, yeah, I have no chance of being enlightened.
Larkin Grimm
#73. Diclofenac, cow aspirin, given to cattle as a muscle relaxant, to ease pain and increase the production of milk, works - worked - like nerve gas on white-backed vultures. Each chemically relaxed, milk-producing cow or buffalo that died became poisoned vulture bait.
Arundhati Roy
#74. HOLY COW!
Wrinkles only go where smiles have been.
Jimmy Buffett
#75. You stupid cow!" He laughed at her behind those icicle eyes. "You really think anyone is better than you? Everyone's a thief, woman! Waiting for the next terrible thing to do to get ahead of their neighbor. Forty of us around a table weren't enough to convince you of that?
Devon Trevarrow Flaherty
#76. Grandchildren can be annoying - how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo and the pig goes oink"? It's like talking to a supermodel.
Joan Rivers
#78. So you fixing to turn farmer on me?" "I'm fixing to do what it takes to win her. And now I come to think on it, right before we met Tamsen, that day in Morganton, weren't you the one talking about planting more corn, getting that cow? Sounded to me like you were the one thinking on turning farmer.
Lori Benton
#79. The only sacred cow is an organisation should be its basic philosophy of doing business.
Thomas Watson Jr.
#80. Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes.
Tommy Douglas
#81. When I took my clothes off in Blue Velvet, I wanted to convey the brutality of sex abuse. I wanted to look like a quartered cow hanging in a butcher shop as well as disturbingly appealing.
Isabella Rossellini
#83. Why writers write I do not know. As well ask why a hen lays an egg or why a cow stands patiently while an underprivileged farmer burglarizes her.
H.L. Mencken
#84. On the farm, I had chores. I had a calf. We had a herd of cattle in the pasture. We'd go and get me a calf at a cow auction with Amish people, which I would raise. I gave it a bottle every day, in this cute little coop, like a giant dog coop almost. I've always been a big animal person.
Krysten Ritter
#85. Smoking I find the most ridiculous of all the varieties of human behavior and practically the only one that is entirely against nature. Can you imagine a cow or any animal taking a mouthful of smoldering straw then breathing in the smoke and blowing it out through its nostrils?
Ian Fleming
#87. There were several packages waiting for me at the post office
and I only barely squealed. They were advanced reader copies
from other bloggers passing them along for review. And I was,
like, whatever. Sure evidence I was coming down with mad cow
disease.
Jennifer L. Armentrout
#88. Mad cow disease? A crazy hunger for blood. There had to be a reasonable explanation for all of this. And there's no such thing as vampires, right?
Alisha Costanzo
#89. Their (Council of Dads) wisdom reads like a psalmbook of living:
Approach the cow
Pack your flip-flops
Don't see the wall
Tend your tadpoles
Live the questions
Harvest miracles
Always learn to juggle on the side of a hill
Take a walk with a turtle
Bruce Feiler
#90. Writing does for me what giving milk does for a cow.
H.L. Mencken
#91. You're a cow
Give me some milk
Or else go home
Bob Dylan
#92. The key to success is to find a way to stand out
to be the purple cow in a field of monochrome Holsteins.
Seth Godin
#93. You should never hesitate to trade your cow for a handful of magic beans.
Tom Robbins
#95. A small cow walked toward him and meowed. What on earth is - Stanhill mentioned you brought your cat. He failed to mention the creature is the size of an SUV.
Kristen Painter
#96. No one would barbecue their family dog. Why is a cow or a pig or a chicken different?
Mike Ness
#97. He doesn't look like a CEO - he looks like a bad boy from the wrong side of town. Holy cow, he's so fucking sexy.
E.L. James
#98. I am really rather like a beautiful Jersey cow, I have the same pathetic droop to the corners of my eyes.
Deborah Kerr
#99. The average man is a conformist, accepting miseries and disasters with the stoicism of a cow standing in the rain.
Colin Wilson
#100. I find books in used-book stores, chain and independent stores, on friends' shelves and being read by some woman sitting opposite me on the subway. I find books the way a cow finds a new pasture, by looking to see where the other cows are headed.
Walter Mosley
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