Top 26 Toilet Paper Roll Quotes
#1. If you want to avoid heated arguments, never discuss religion, politics, or whether the toilet paper roll should go over or under.
Al Yankovic
#2. But it has perks -- personal pride, financial security, and the feeling of accomplishment and control that comes when you just swap in a new toilet paper roll rather than resorting to fast-food napkins.
Kelly Williams Brown
#3. You know it's the 21st Century when someone TEXTS you from the washroom to ask you to bring them a roll of toilet paper.
Tanya Masse
#4. I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
Andy Rooney
#5. Don't let yourself fall into 'empty.' Keep cash in the house. Keep gas in your tank. Keep an extra roll of toilet paper squirreled away. Keep your phone charged.
Gretchen Rubin
#6. Does not-your boyfriend realize I'm Mormon?"
I nod. "It turns out, Holder doesn't have an issue with Mormons at all. He just has an issue with assholes.
Colleen Hoover
#7. Toilet paper unrolled and slithered
then wrapped around my tummy.
That paper tried to roll me up
into an Egyptian mummy.
Melinda K. Trotter
#8. Everyone seemed to want a piece of Ronald Reagan. It was maddening.
Michael Reagan
#9. You're the man who stands on the street corner with a roll of toilet paper, and written on each square are the words, 'I love you.' And each passer-by, no matter who, gets a square all his or her own. I don't want my square of toilet paper.'
I didn't realize it was toilet paper.
Kurt Vonnegut
#10. Life in battle is like a roll of toilet paper....the more you use it, the less you have left.
Charles A. Krohn
#11. The wide screen reminds me of a roll of toilet paper.
Yasujiro Ozu
#12. I'd appreciate if you'd grow the hell up and stop walking around like the world crapped on your only roll of toilet paper.
Tahereh Mafi
#13. War ... a reversal of the rules where a man is permitted to kill all the humans he can.
John Steinbeck
#14. Also, there had been a period of about ten years when Scott had somehow gotten larger than life - to others, and sometimes to himself. (Not to Lisey; she was the one who had to fetch him a fresh roll of toilet paper if he ran out while he was on the john.)
Stephen King
#16. You know you're lazy when you run out of toilet paper and use the cardboard roll to wipe with.
Dane Cook
#18. A long white ribbon shot out of the crack in the wall. The ribbon just kept coming, weaving itself into some kind of shape next to Anubis, and my first thought was, My god, he's got a magic roll of toilet paper.
Rick Riordan
#19. In life, every ending is just the start of another story.
Julian Barnes
#20. Most people die, living their life paycheck to paycheck,trying to stretch out each dollar, as like a roll of toilet paper. Toiling each tissue, never quite wiping away all the shit from their asses, where the world always takes what little they flush, back into its deprived system, always hungry.
Anthony Liccione
#21. The concerto's beauty was even more impassioned than he remembered, and also more piteous and quiet and restrained, and he clasped his hands together to absorb both the grief and joy in his body.
Madeleine Thien
#22. Look for your choices, pick the best one, then go with it.
Pat Riley
#23. Nothing reminds one of how shitty inequality is more often than the fact that there are companies who make and people who use 1-ply toilet papers.
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
#24. Some kid asked what a dilemma is. And I replied: When a starving man has to choose between a plate of food, and, a roll of toilet paper.
Mokokoma Mokhonoana
#25. I came here to be happy, and I'm going to be happy. If I smile, then maybe I can convince my body just how happy I am.
Lisa See
#26. And I'd really appreciate it if you'd grow the hell up and stop walking around like the world crapped on your only roll of toilet paper. Because it's stupid,
Tahereh Mafi
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