To Your Ex Quotes

#1. You don't particularly want to stay close to your ex-wife. Or why would she be your ex-wife?

Ian McShane

#2. Your allegiance is with your spouse; you cannot break that by showing allegiance to your ex-spouse.

Connie Sellecca

#3. Going back to your ex is like taking back your spit from the ground.

M.F. Moonzajer

#4. One of the benefits of being divorced is that you no longer need to listen to your ex's assessment of the appropriateness of your actions.

Amy Dickinson

#5. I said, "It seems like you have fond feelings towrd your ex-wife. Are you two still close?" "Nah," he said casually. "She thinks I changed my name to motherfucker.

Elizabeth Gilbert

#6. He stepped on it. Squished it. Squashed it. Killed it. Cut it down in its prime. It kicked the bucket, turned up its toes, shuffled off this mortal coil. It was ... an ex-rabbit."
"He's a dangerous man, your father."
"The baby better learn to dodge.

Derek Landy

#7. It has taken me a long time to work out the function of ex-boyfriends, at least for me: how they can help you work out what you want from life and from a partner by showing you what you don't. If a man is your ex, it's better all round if he was not Mr. Right.

Nicola Monaghan

#8. ..reading your ex's horoscope every week isn't going to help you control his life. No, you need to hide in his bushes, break into his email, or kidnap his dog if you want to effect any real change.

Jenny Mollen

#9. I was thinking about the cow thing. About how hanging on to an ex-boyfriend is like chewing your cud until somebody drops a fresh bale of hay in front of you. Or something like that.

Dandi Daley Mackall

#10. Let us end this farce, observer! Give me your final, most beloved act of "will"... The one you most wish to believe was your own idea!
"My own... will... I... I believe that this love for Yukiteru-kun... is real!

Sakae Esuno

#11. But if there was a protocol for how to say goodbye to your newly ex-boyfriend's brother, right after you kissed him and probably sent your ex into the arms of his willing ex-girlfriend, I didn't know what it was.

Rachel Vincent

#12. I can't promise I'll never kill anyone again," he once said, strapping a refrigerator to his back. "It's unrealistic to live your life within such strict parameters

David Sedaris

#13. When you gotta go out and make a movie to pay for the kid's private school and for the three ex-wives, don't talk to me about your artistry. It's their job. It's not my job. It's my calling.

Quentin Tarantino

#14. You want to know what it feels like to be castrated? Try having your nine-year-old brother protect you from your ex-girlfriend after you've told her you're in love with a man.

T.J. Klune

#15. It's like I'm married to the silencer,
Until I file for divorce and release my ex-calibers.
Do art with your arteries, place that for my adversaries,
Put your snap back cap back, cap your capillaries.

Pharoahe Monch

#16. I quickly learned that as the ex-whatever, you only get so many golden opportunities to keep your mouth shut, and you should take advantage of every single one.

Chris Hadfield

#17. Thank you so much for the rude know-it-all attitude while also having to look at your ridiculously colored hair and obnoxious facial and chest piercings. I am very fortunate to have just been schooled by someone who looks like they graduated from Care Bear Carnage University.

Heather Chapple

#18. Fletcher was always going to be your ex-boyfriend, from the moment you met him. He's just finally caught up with where he's supposed to be.

Derek Landy

#19. Darlin', you can't tell me your ex wasn't adventurous and not expect me to see it as a challenge.

Leah Braemel

#20. Some men get the world, some men get ex-hookers and a trip to Arizona. You're in with the former, but my God I don't envy the blood on your conscience.

James Ellroy

#21. I'm in love with your ex-wife," ... "I've loved her since high school, man. She means everything to me. You gotta drag her down, that'll suck, but I'll pick her back up. You gotta rip her apart, I'll fuckin' hate watchin' it, but I'll put her back together.

Kristen Ashley

#22. Christiana as much as I still love you and never wished for our marriage to end, you were, you are and will always be a Barrington. Your father has seen to that her ex-husband bristled

Peggy Hattendorf

#23. The Orwellian vision was about state-sponsored surveillance. Now it's not just the state, it's your nosy neighbor, your ex-spouse and people who want to spam you.

Howard Rheingold

#24. If you have been harboring anger or bitterness or jealousy in your heart toward someone - a parent, an ex-spouse, a boss - hand it over to Christ, and ask Him to help you let it go.

Billy Graham

#25. If you're walking down the street and you smell a scent, it can take you right back to a memorable time in your life, whether it's a moment with an ex-girlfriend or a childhood event.

Chris Evans

#26. In my day we used to have pray to run into an ex looking great, but now you just post a selfie in your underwear.

Heather McDonald

#27. Get Your Ex Back: The 4 Things Your Ex Needs You to Do Before You Get Back Together

Clay Andrews

#28. It was funny how all the useless knowledge you accumulated when you're in love with someone could sit for years gathering dust in the back of your mind, only to spill out at the slightest reminder.

Blakney Francis

#29. There's a guy out there who's going to be really happy that you didn't get back together with your crappy ex-boyfriend.

Greg Behrendt

#30. I know why you do what you do, and I get it. But from one ex-martyr to a current martyr ... get over your bullshit and ask for help.

Samantha Young

#31. These days, though, he was as unpredictable as an alley cat. One minute, he's purring on
your lap. The next, he's scowling at you from the window sill, and you're left wondering if he's plotting your demise over there, just waiting for you to fall asleep. That's Will.

Laura Miller

#32. Politicians are really getting desperate. In fact, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid sent out a final fundraising email to Democrats with the subject line, 'I'm begging.' Because what better way to show you're a strong leader than acting like you're drunk and dialing your ex?

Jimmy Fallon

#33. Maybe she'd ended up going to Ireland because whilst visiting her father she'd bumped into an old love from her youth, perhaps even her ex? Such spontaneous acts really only worked with men left over from earlier in your life.

Eva Heller

#34. If you try to send a clear signal to and call your SoulMate into your life, having unfinished business with your ex is like static on the line.

Annette Vaillancourt

#35. I know you lost your partner in crime, but ... I want YOU to be MINE. Maybe WE should travel the world together, Camryn ... I know I can't replace your ex
"
"Andrew ... it was always you.

J.A. Redmerski

#36. It's a mood record. Like one night you're going to be down in the dumps depressed because you're thinking about your ex-boyfriend and the next moment you're gonna be like screw him you know? And the next one you're saying to yourself 'God I'm in love.'

Willa Ford

#37. Stop trying to make an X-men out of an Ex man. If he was meant to be super he would have been, leave the past in the past and look to your future. - AHC III

A.H. Carlisle III

#38. A relationship is NOT about your new partner to hear the things you didn't tell your ex's and for you to live on the fear of past relationship(s) ... BUT sometimes the person cannot love you as much as you appreciate yourself.

Coco Nicole Estef

#39. Personally, I think there's a lot to recommend being friends with your ex, and I'm glad to admit that I'm living proof of its possibility.

Mariella Frostrup

#40. What are you gonna say?" Emma asked. " 'I'm not sure I want you back, but I'm sure I don't want your ex-con ex-girlfriend to have you, either'? Yeah. That'll start this little triangle off on the right foot.

Rachel Vincent

#41. He laughed again. "Not boring and not dumb. That's so much better than your boyfriend who both bored me and was dumb. To be honest I don't
know what you saw in him."
"Ex. Ex-boyfriend " she said. "I swear to God I'm never going to live that down.

Thea Harrison

#42. One of my mother's friends said to me, 'Your ex-boyfriends didn't stand a chance with you and your mother.' And I think I probably was unfair to them because she was the first person and the last person I called about every single thing. Sorry, ex-boyfriends.

Lily Rabe

#43. I think when you get older, things come along that you know are a test in some way of your ability to stay with it. And when e-mail came along, I was just going to fall in love with it. And I did. I can't believe it now - it's like one of those ex-husbands that you think, 'What was I thinking?'

Nora Ephron

#44. Violence is one way to silence people, to deny their voice and their credibility, to assert your right to control over their right to exist. About three women a day are murdered by spouses or ex-spouses in this country. It's one of the main causes of death for pregnant women in the United States. At

Rebecca Solnit

#45. I'm going after your ex-husband," I heard him say softly. "And when I finish, there won't be enough left of him to fill a fucking matchbox.

Lisa Kleypas

#46. I think that my regrets mostly have to do with my relationship with my ex-girlfriend. Every once in a while, you get those flashback memories of conversations you had with your exes, and you just, like, wince when you're walking down the street. Something occurs to you, 'Oh, no, I said that.'

Mike Birbiglia

#47. Some ex-lovers you see from time to time, and it's great to run into them; and some you'd like to run into, but they seem to avoid the stretch of road you're on when you put your foot down...

Bronwyn Angela White

#48. My ex-husband happens to be one of the most gifted moviemakers. And what is so bizarre about working with someone like that? I guess it is bizarre to be good friends with your ex-husband.

Ali MacGraw

#49. You should change your Password"
"not exactly a priority so I haven't got'round to it"
"I'll do it for you"I offered.
His arms gave me a squeeze and he grinned.
"What'll you chose?"
before I could stop my mouth from forming the words, I said "Shebitchfromhell666

Kristen Ashley

#50. Which is where I met my my husband. Not currently my husband. My ex. Though he wasn't that then. I never know how to say that."
"Allow my copydesk expertise to intervene: your then-pre-husband, later-to-be-post-husband in his prior-to-ex-husband status.

Tom Rachman

#51. I'm sensin' we're comin' to a positive end to this discussion so I don't wanna piss you off, but I'm not your counselor. I'm your ex-wife's man. You need to process shit, do it with one of your boys. I got shit to do.

Kristen Ashley

#52. In your ex-wife's stingy, slutty pussy, is the subtle point I'm trying to portray.

R.K. Lilley

#53. It's been so many years since I actually had a date that I've forgotten how to act. You don't mention your ex when you've finished fucking your date; it's poor protocol

Scarlet Blackwell

#54. You actually fucked her? What, did her forked tongue feel exceptionally good on your dick or something? - Keely to Jack after meeting his ex-girlfriend.

Lorelei James

#55. So are we stalking your ex-husband?"
"I'm a licensed private investigator," I said. "I'm licensed to stalk."
"Really?"
"In most cases."
"What about this case?"
"In this case," I said. "We're stalking the hell out of him.

J.R. Rain

#56. When your ex says "I miss you", that means the person they tried to replace you with has failed.

Manasa Rao

#57. When I'm ninety-five and it's 'This is Your Life' time, they'll still be referring to me as 'ex-Beatle' ... it does have it's advantages. It's still the best way to get a good table at a resturant.

Ringo Starr

#58. Gentlemen. You are looking at the true Abraham Lincoln of Arabia. And in order to end our internal bickering - our civil war, if you will - I have solicited your aid.

Leonard Leventon

#59. So you're going shopping with your ex-boyfriend to find an outfit to snare your next boyfriend? Oh, what a tangled web you weave.

Jillian Dodd

#60. Divorce isn't the child's fault. Don't say anything unkind about your ex to the child, because you're really just hurting the child.

Valerie Bertinelli