Stupid Drunk Quotes

#1. I'm sorry, what did you say? I'm not fluent in stupid drunk slut

Christine Zolendz

#2. Your Grace," he said, when he and Cersei were alone, "I was wondering. Are you drunk, or merely stupid?

George R R Martin

#3. I have nothing I want to ask you, and if I did, you would probably lie anyway."
"I'm drunk. Drunk people tell the truth."
"Like hell they do. Besides you're not that drunk."
"Then dare me something."
I snorted. "No, because I'm not that drunk, or stupid.

Elizabeth Morgan

#4. The basic function of a comic is stand-up because it's so straightforward and simple. If the audience don't laugh, you didn't do your job. I've had some audiences where I didn't care if they laughed or not because they were either too drunk or stupid.

Marcus Brigstocke

#5. I may be loaded. I may be drunk. But I ain't stupid.

Phil Anselmo

#6. Your critics are the ones telling you they still love you and care. Worry when you do something badly and nobody bothers to tell you.

Randy Pausch

#7. They've drunk everything in the house, including a pitcher of African violet plant food I'd just mixed up and was stupid enough to leave on the counter."
Tremaine punched Eddie in the shoulder. "I told you it tasted weird."
Eddie shrugged. "Tasted okay to me.

Susan Elizabeth Phillips

#8. A lot of people think that since I'm drunk in my stories, I must be drunk 24 hours a day. What kind of stupid logic is that? It'd be like if you saw Michael Jordan at a restaurant and were like, "Why aren't you in your basketball uniform?" I leave out way more than I put in.

Tucker Max

#9. No one really needs to defend drinking. That's something that frustrates me as a comic: I have to play clubs where selling booze runs the business, so crowds get drunk and yell out a bunch of stupid stuff at me.

Doug Benson

#10. Hey, if you decided to tear up the town, you can always use the leftover bread from my breakfast in place of your cane. I'm pretty sure it's hard enough to bust heads.

Jennifer Rardin

#11. Being drunk leads smart people to do stupid things, which is what is so interesting.

Kit Williamson

#12. I never was in love - yet the voice and the shape of a woman has haunted me these two days.

John Keats

#13. It's for Carson. (Margery)
And I repeat what I said. Just what I need, a bunch of drunk fucks working on me. Remind me not to do anything stupid tonight. Oh wait, I'm here. Too late for that warning, huh? (Fury)

Sherrilyn Kenyon

#14. I swear to you, I am the cheapest drunk on the planet. It takes nothing to get me loopy and doing stupid stuff. Yeah. Some of you like that? Well ... like riding an electric floor buffer for a shot of tequila. Did it!

Bill Engvall

#15. Fred put away the phone, finished off his bourbon, and resumed watching the couple suck on the combined mass of their two tongues. He wasn't as drunk as them. Or as young. Or as stupid. He envied them on every score.

Alex Shakar

#16. I remember meeting a mother of a child who was abducted by the North Koreans right here in the Oval Office.

George W. Bush

#17. If you're going to succeed, you've got to be like one of those punch-drunk fighters in the old Warner Bros. boxing pictures: too stupid to fall down, you just keep slugging and stay on your feet.

Frank Darabont

#18. That was a stupid idea I made up while drunk. Why did someone build that?

Warren Ellis

#19. There were two kinds of stupid. Stupid people that got drunk and humped trees, and stupid people that just humped trees.

Penelope Douglas

#20. Only the faithful God knows the future.

Lailah Gifty Akita

#21. And sometimes drunk women aren't raped; they just make stupid choices
and to say we deserve special treatment when we're drunk because we're women, to say we need to be looked after, I find offensive.

Gillian Flynn

#22. Unfortunately, a lot of people are stupid. They take drugs. They get drunk and do all the wrong things in life. I just played it straight.

Bobby Vinton

#23. If you expect me to read your mind you're going to have to think more clearly.

Spuds Crawford

#24. I don't have a favorite author; I have favorite books. 'Moby Dick' is a favorite book, but Melville was a drunk who beat his wife. 'Moveable Feast' by Hemingway, but I would not like him personally. He was a stupid macho person who believed in shooting animals for fun, but that book was incredible!

Gary Paulsen