Top 100 Straight Man Quotes
#1. One should never lose hope. Homosexuality can strike any straight man at any age.
Roger Peyrefitte
#2. Drag shows are one of my favorite things in the world. As a straight man I love going to gay bars. People at gay bars just love to dance.
Steve Kazee
#3. I've been a straight man for so many years that from force of habit I repeat everything. I went out fishing with a fellow the other day and he fell overboard. He yelled, Help! Help! Help! so I said, Help? Help? Help? And while I was waiting for him to get his laugh, he drowned.
George Burns
#4. A gay man can be friends with a straight man. That can happen.
Steve Guttenberg
#5. I have nothing to complain about.. except maybe people wondering if a queen like me can be butch-it-up enough to play a convincing straight man.
Rupert Everett
#6. All men are homosexual, some turn straight. It must be very odd to be a straight man because your sexuality is hopelessly defensive. It's like an ideal of racial purity.
Derek Jarman
#7. Said the straight man to the late man
Where have you been
I've been here and I've been there
And I've been in between
I talk to the wind
My words are all carried away
I talk to the wind
The wind does not hear
The wind cannot hear
King Crimson
#8. I'd love to do a comedy. I'd love to do a two-hander like the old Leathal Weapon movies. I love those, like an action comedy with the straight man and the funny man. I'd love to do one of those. Just got to find one, find a funny man that wants to do one with me.
Jason Statham
#9. Religion theme aside, most of the time I'm in some sort of comedy and I'm a straight man and it's really just, let's wind this guy up and see him explode.
Colin Hanks
#10. Why are all gay men understanding and compassionate?"
"Pfft." I arced an eyebrow at her. "They're not, trust me. Its a myth."
"A straight man wouldn't understand cramps, mood swings, backaches, not to mention the price of tampons ...
Zathyn Priest
#11. It's not common for a woman on television, especially if she's the mom of the family, to be funny. She's usually a straight man or foil.
Martha Plimpton
#12. Because Buffy really has become the straight man, every once in a while it's nice to be the one that tells the joke and it's nice to be the one that is the joke and it's nice to do something that's a little bit different.
Sarah Michelle Gellar
#13. Every sitcom needs their straight man or straight woman.
Aarti Mann
#14. Straight Man: But my daughter belongs to a talk show generation that seems to be losing the ability to discriminate between public and private woes.
Richard Russo
#15. Above these universal themes 'Truth Will Set U Free' is also a song composed for those who were born gay. I am a straight man so I do not profess to understand or know what a LGBT person experiences but I do recognize injustice when I see it.
Corey Hart
#16. The last time a straight man worked in the fashion industry, we got a fanny pack.
Chelsea Handler
#17. Chris O'Dowd is a very special talent. He's one of those very, very rare actors who can be the clown, or he can be the straight man playing off the clown, in a scene.
Jim Piddock
#18. The idea of the straight man is very important. But I'd rather it be somebody else, because it's not as fun. And when I say somebody else, of course I mean Jason Bateman. He's born to play boring characters because he's such a bore. He's one of the most boring human beings.
Will Arnett
#19. I just think that gay men have much better taste than any straight man I have met. I have never gotten any grief about having a good time, being unapologetic, and irreverent from a gay man.
Kesha
#20. A lot of comedies are based on the reaction shot. You have one person doing something stupid and one person is generally the straight man, and the laughs generally come on the reaction of the straight man to the funny thing the other person has done.
Richard Ayoade
#21. The best cure for a hangover is something one straight man can't do for another straight man.
Ben Affleck
#22. The dykes versus the fags, but every straight man in the U.S who watched porn wanted to see two women getting off together. Lesbians held a unique place in the intolerant American psyche: it was the men who lay with men who challenged the words of the Holy Bible
Jenna Hilary Sinclair
#23. I'm not a straight man, but I play one on television.
Dan Butler
#24. My roles in comedies from 'Austin Powers' to 'Tommy Boy' to 'Wayne's World,' were sort of comedic 'straight man' parts. My character on 'Parks & Recreation' is the comic relief in a comedy. To play a character that appears strictly for laughs is sort of new for me and really fun.
Rob Lowe
#25. I watched 'Ghostbusters' from the age of four. It's my favorite movie, still. Bill Murray's, like, the weirdest straight man that you've ever seen. He's convinced that he's the normal one, even though he's definitely not.
Jake Lacy
#26. In the history of show business, there probably never was a straighter straight man than banana-yellow Bert, the paper clip collector and pigeon fancier.
Michael Davis
#27. My comedic instinct, is a little bit more rooted in - my mother's British so I've always been more of the dry receiver of the crazy as opposed to the initiator of the crazy. I'm kind of predisposed to be the straight man.
Jason Bateman
#28. Well, anybody can be a straight man if he hears well. You just have to wait for laughs. A straight man just repeats the questions and the comedian gets the laughs and you just wait for them and don't let them die completely at the tail end of the laugh.
George Burns
#29. Bonner leans his forehead against hers. Zig when they think you'll zag. Creation's Rule Number Two.
What's Number One? Els asks, willing to be this bent soul's straight man.
Zag when they think you'll zig.
Richard Powers
#30. I see my role in the Bonzos as being the straight man, in many ways.
Neil Innes
#31. You've got to be a really straight man to write a song like 'It's Raining Men.'
Paul Shaffer
#32. They spent the rest of that afternoon together. Maybe he felt guilty for giving Quentin the cigarette, or maybe Eliot had decided that the tedium of solitude was ever so slightly greater than the tedium of Quentin's company. Maybe he just needed a straight man. He
Lev Grossman
#33. The brilliance of Adam Scott is that he is so damn funny in a straight man role.
Rob Thomas
#34. For a straight man, I seem to have to kiss an awful lot of men!
Dominic West
#35. I was an only child and I had a mother and father who were just - there wasn't a straight man in the house, and I mean that in a very nice way. They were fun, and we would laugh a lot.
Betty White
#37. Every straight man I know is a feminist. They wouldn't be my friends if they weren't.
Ronee Blakley
#38. One of my favorite comedy performances of all time is Charles Grodin in 'Midnight Run,' and in a lot of things he's done. I think he's hilarious as the straight man, playing it real.
Andy Daly
#39. The closest he comes to explaining why he found it gay is to say that like "Virginia Woolf", it showed a woman defeating a man. Presumably a straight man could never imagine such a thing.
Christopher Bram
#40. I was a straight man long before I knew what it was called. I was just the boring one.
Jason Sudeikis
#41. Tighter than a straight man's butt cheeks in prison
Kim Harrison
#42. Although in Abbott and Costello, and straight man was first. That's a very interesting concept.
Harvey Korman
#43. A poet might die at twenty-one, a revolutionary or a rock star at twenty four. But after that you assume everything's going to be all right. you've made it past Dead Man's Curve and you're out of the tunnel, cruising straight for your destination down a six lane highway whether you want it or not.
Haruki Murakami
#44. The old white man didn't look into your eyes, he looked clear through your eyes, and straight to the inside of the back of your head. 'Instead of runnin from pain, which is the natural thing in life, in boxing you step to it, get me?
F.X. Toole
#45. The anarchic is the true divine state of man in the end as in the beginning; but in between it would lead us straight to the devil and his kingdom.
Sri Aurobindo
#46. But what [Gansey] said was, "I'm going to need everyone to be straight with each other from now on. No more games. This isn't just for Blue, either. All of us."
Ronan said, "I'm always straight."
Adam replied, "Oh, man, that's the biggest lie you've ever told."
Blue said, "Okay.
Maggie Stiefvater
#47. I realize that I am powerless to resist him. There's nothing I can do; this man has a GPS navigation system that takes him straight to the center of my heart.
Carole Matthews
#48. According to Herodotus, the ancient Persians felt that what was necessary in the background of a young man entering adulthood was his ability to ride, shoot straight, and speak the truth. Perhaps we should now grant our college degrees to young men who measure up to that standard.
Jeff Cooper
#50. Never has man reached his destination by persistence in deviation from the straight path.
Mahatma Gandhi
#51. I have never seen a man lost who was on a straight path.
Saadi
#52. A man may be as straight as an arrow, but even then he will have some critics.
Umar
#53. It is not the right angle that attracts me, nor the straight line, hard and inflexible, created by man. What attracts me is the free and sensual curve - the curve that I find in the mountains of my country, in the sinuous course of its rivers, in the body of the beloved woman.
Oscar Niemeyer
#54. The Pawn moves only one square at a time, and that straight forward, except in the act of capturing, when it takes one step diagonally to the right or left file on to the square occupied by the man taken, and continues on that file until it captures another man.
Howard Staunton
#55. When you're a young man, Macbeth is a character part. When you're older, it's a straight part.
Laurence Olivier
#56. You thought wrong. I'm a new man, bein's I'm in lurve and all. I'm a softer, more understanding man. A kinder, gentler - " Deacon snorted. "Fuck. I couldn't even say that shit with a straight face.
Lorelei James
#57. When the virus of restlessness begins to take possession of a wayward man, and the road away from Here seems broad and straight and sweet, the victim must first find himself a good and sufficient reason for going.
John Steinbeck
#58. I, I am my own woman. I have not been, quote, 'bred' to look the other way. I look at that man back there in the green room straight on, eyes wide open, and I look at him with an open heart.
Maria Shriver
#59. A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line.
C.S. Lewis
#60. Former President George W. Bush has hired a man to lead his presidential think tank in Dallas. The man was hired because he was the only candidate who could say the words, 'George W. Bush think tank' with a straight face.
Conan O'Brien
#61. Feel no fear before the multitude of men, do not run in panic,
but let each man bear his shield straight toward the fore-fighters,
regarding his own life as hateful and holding the dark spirits of death as dear as the radiance of the sun.
Tyrtaeus
#62. GRANDMA: Are you a gay?
ORPHEUS: I am straight. I'm definitely dating a girl, gran. Do you think she's a man?
*She laughs*
ORPHEUS' BRAIN: Thank god she took it as a joke. I would have been executed on the town square for such a rude back answer.
Scarlett Brukett
#63. I am willing to remain and play the man's game if there are not enough boats for more than the women and children. Tell my wife I played the game straight out and to the end. No woman shall be left aboard this ship because Ben Guggenheim is a coward.
Benjamin Guggenheim
#64. Here is the real domino theory - gay man to gay man, bisexual man to straight woman, addict mother to newborn baby, they all fall down and someday it will come to you.
Anna Quindlen
#65. We didn't ever want 'Tarzan' to feel like he was just a man. We didn't want him to stand up straight or wave good-bye. We wanted to make sure he always had that piece of gorilla in him, that he always had an animal attitude about him.
Kevin Lima
#66. I think every rapper should know how to sing, like a little bit. I mean common man it'll make your rapping better straight up.
SonReal
#67. From such crooked wood as that which man is made of, nothing straight can be fashioned.
Immanuel Kant
#68. To the man-in-the-street, who, I'm sorry to say, is a keen observer of life. The word Intellectual suggests straight away. A man who's untrue to his wife.
W. H. Auden
#69. I've learned when you drink Absolut straight, it burns enough to give my chest hairs a perm.
Method Man
#70. This boy - this man - was asking for the moon and the stars. And I was willing to shoot us straight off the map. And offer him the entire universe.
Christina Lee
#71. It is not proper for man's life to be a circle, she thought, or a string of circles dropping off like zeros behind him - man's life must be a straight line of motion from goal to farther goal, each leading to the next and to a single growing sum.
Ayn Rand
#72. I know you love how I make it all go away:
all the joy, all the pain, all thoughts in your brain.
For the price of your soul, I will hold your heart in my talons.
For three summers straight you've been my sweet eye candy;
and no one will ever, ever, take you away from me.
Say Anything, Skinny Mean Man
#73. The Wise Man is square but not sharp, honest but not not malign, straight but not severe, bright but not dazzling.
Lao-Tzu
#74. Don't let these tattoos fool you. I'm straight edge. I'm a man of great discipline; I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs ... my addiction is wrestling - my obsession is competition. Discipline. My name is C ... M ... Punk.
CM Punk
#75. Theo McLean, fact examiner. If I were harsh, I'd say he was a nerd, but it's not cool to put someone down with labels. But man, he was a nerd. He was smart too. Straight-A smart. Except for gym.
D.J. MacHale
#76. Straight men need to be emasculated ... Every straight guy should have a man's tongue in his mouth at least once.
Madonna Ciccone
#77. My argument against God was that the universe seemed so cruel and unjust. But how had I got this idea of just and unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line. What was I comparing this universe with when I called it unjust?
C.S. Lewis
#78. I've worked in television for 10 years straight. If I were a man, it wouldn't be considered strange [to have confidence] at all.
Mindy Kaling
#79. The first man stepped up to the open door. All the men had been ordered to look out at the horizon, not straight down, for obvious psychological reasons.
Stephen E. Ambrose
#80. You're Mara, you're sweet, you're beautiful and I will not forget until the day I die how beautiful it felt to slide inside you with you wrapped around me, see your eyes get wet and know straight in my gut that you felt how beautiful it was too.
Kristen Ashley
#81. Cat, gray tabby, calm, watches large, black ant. Man, rapt, stands staring at cat and ant. Ant advances along path. Ant halts, baffled. Ant back-tracks fast - straight at cat. Cat, alarmed, backs away. Man, standing, staring, laughs. Ant changes path again. Cat, calm again, watches again.
Lydia Davis
#82. On a pitch black, starless night, a solitary man was trudging along the main road from Marchiennes to Montsou, ten kilometres of cobblestones running straight as a die across the bare plain between fields of beet.
Emile Zola
#83. And that's what's wrong with the world.." "Man, woman, straight, gay. There's nothing wrong with wanting someone. We're all adults.
Lindsey Kelk
#84. To stand up straight and tread the turning mill,
To lie flat and know nothing and be still,
Are the two trades of man; and which is worse
I know not, but I know that both are ill.
A.E. Housman
#85. It was the first smile of my life. Of course, that is a ridiculous thing to say; I had been smiled at often, the big man had smiled at me not a minute since. And yet I say: it was the first smile, because it was the first that ever went straight into me like a needle too thin to be seen.
Carol Birch
#86. What do you most wish for, Izzy?"
"Herbs and salads, and fish straight from the river. A man needs no more than such pleasures.
Mary Novik
#87. I have two sons now. And just being on the road all the time - I was on the road for about five years straight, and at some point, something clicks inside your head and you think, "Man, I've got to figure out what's going on inside myself," as far as my personal faith.
Mason Jennings
#88. I've given up on trying to explain myself, or trying to set the record straight, or trying to get people to understand what I'm really like as a man, outside of my acting, outside of my job.
Bruce Willis
#89. Whether we are rich or poor, young or old, man or woman, straight or gay: all of us are called to our own brand of personal holiness.
James Martin
#90. Can you tell a plain man the road to heaven? Certainly, turn at once to the right, then go straight forward.
William Wilberforce
#91. You can be our critic. Would you dig that? (Yes, he was the last Man in America who could say "dig" with a straight face without referring to the process of using a tool to remove dirt from the ground.)
Jordan Sonnenblick
#92. The straight line, a respectable optical illusion which ruins many a man.
Victor Hugo
#93. Armor is heavy, yet it is a proud burden, and a man standeth straight in it.
Mark Twain
#94. PICKERING:Excuse the straight question, Higgins. Are you a man of good character where women are concerned?
HIGGINS [moodily]:Have you ever met a man of good character where women are concerned?
George Bernard Shaw
#95. If there is confusion in your head and in your heart, what more do you want! A man who no longer loves and no longer errs should have himself buried straight away.
Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
#96. One day is enough for a man to know all happiness. My dear ones, why do we quarrel, try to outshine each other and keep grudges against each other? Let's go straight into the garden, walk and play there, love, appreciate each other and glorify life.
Fyodor Dostoyevsky
#97. We cannae just rush in, ye ken."
"Point o' order, Big Man. Ye can just rush in. We always just rush in."
"Aye, Big Yan, point well made. But ye gotta know where ye're just gonna rush in. Ye cannae just rush in anywhere. It looks bad, havin' to rush oout again straight awa'.
Terry Pratchett
#98. A man who prides himself on going in a straight line through life is an idiot who believes in infallibility.
Honore De Balzac
#99. The man was the finest preacher. He could make a frog stand up straight and get happy with Jesus.
James McBride
#100. Look into the world
how often do you behold a sordid wretch, whose straight heart is open to no man's affliction, taking shelterbehind an appearance of piety, and putting on the garb of religion, which none but the merciful and compassionate have a title to wear.
Laurence Sterne
