Shaving Humor Quotes

#1. I had only four hairs worth shaving, but I managed to inflict five cuts attempting to remove them.

Troy Soos

#2. Whosoever shall not fall by the sword or by famine, shall fall by pestilence so why bother shaving?

Woody Allen

#3. After someone's death, how strange to see the value drain away from his or her possessions; useful objects such as clothes, or dish towels, or personal papers become little more than trash.

Gretchen Rubin

#4. You may need help or information from some nongovernmental organization, and the local person heading that NGO may be some West Coast, liberal-educated, no-leg-shaving, Birkenstock-wearing female uniform-hater. And you gotta deal with her.

Dick Couch

#5. Harry moved the tip of his eagle-feather quill down the page, frowning as he looked for something that would help him write his essay, Witch Burning in the Fourteenth Century Was Completely Pointless - discuss.

J.K. Rowling

#6. What were parents anyway, except two people who had once thought they were the smartest people in the world? They were a delusional species, as tiny-brained as dinosaurs.

Emma Straub

#7. I hate cutting my wrists while shaving

Josh Stern

#8. I don't think jogging is healthy, especially morning jogging. If morning joggers knew how tempting they looked to morning motorists, they would stay home and do sit-ups.

Rita Rudner

#9. ,dying seems like the greatest weakness, and in a world where people say you're lazy for not shaving your legs, then being dead seems like the ultimate character flaw.
Chapter I.

Chuck Palahniuk

#10. I couldn't have loved her more if she was my own child. But sometimes I considered shaving her eyebrows off while she slept.
For the sake of developing her character.

Molly Harper

#11. This has been the freakin' longest night of my life," I said with dismay. "Yeah," he replied. "And it's not over yet.

D.J. MacHale

#12. I've had so many bikini waxes, I cry every time I see a Popsicle stick.

Libba Bray