Top 42 Rain Humor Quotes
#1. Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you.
Langston Hughes
#2. They've never known a time when people drank rain water because it was pure, or could eat snow, or swim in any river or brook. The last time I drove to Washington the traffic was so bad that I could have made better time with a horse.
Madeleine L'Engle
#3. I am Apollo," I announced. "You mortals have three choices: offer me tribute, flee, or be destroyed."
I wanted my words to echo through the alley, shake the towers of New York, and cause the skies to rain smoking ruin. None of that happened. On the word destroyed, my voice squeaked.
Rick Riordan
#4. I like one hair, tuna fish, the smell of rain and things that are pink. I hate pimples, baked potatoes, when my mother's mad, and religious holidays.
Judy Blume
#5. Does she realize she looks like a sunflower, ready to rain sunlight on all who look down upon her?
Simone Elkeles
#6. Some mate," Karl Framm said with contempt. "Hell, that little stern-wheeler we're chasin' don't draw nothin'. After a good rain, she could steam halfway across the city of N'Orleans without ever noticin' that she'd left the river.
George R R Martin
#7. As rain began to fall, Aldric worried the old machines would not be able to survive the weather. "Hand me that oil can!" he shouted to Siomon.
Magic machines need oil?" asked Simon.
Of course they need oil. They're not perfect.
Jason Hightman
#8. In life there are going to be some things that make it hard to smile. Through all the rain and pain you got to keep your sense of humor and smile for me now. Remember that.
Tupac Shakur
#9. Never dance in a puddle when there's a hole in your shoe (it's always best to take your shoes off first).
John D. Rhodes
#10. They watched the rain and downed their Cokes like a pair of diabetics in a suicide pact.
Paco Ignacio Taibo II
#11. Some days I tell myself that my mission is to say something about the art and sometimes the bliss of limitation. And the legibility of landscape. Other days are more dismal. As if I were queueing in the rain outside confessional literature's nudist colony, mirrors everywhere, blue with cold.
Fredrik Sjoberg
#12. When people try to rain on your parade, ... pee on theirs
Josh Stern
#13. I spent six hours becoming one with a shrubbery last night. There were three cloudbursts and a rain of small and very confused frogs
Charles Stross
#14. I caught his drift, but I wasn't going to argue for a single second. Just get me to the Hampshire House, that's all I cared about. Besides, how could I say, "No, I'm not a prositute. I'm Mrs. Frank Sinatra out for an early morning walk in the rain"?
Ava Gardner
#15. He then departed, to make himself still more interesting, in the midst of an heavy rain.
Jane Austen
#16. Humor is to the soul, what rain is to the earth
Gerry Hopman
#17. Meg's face clouded, and I wondered if she was going to rain the way people do sometimes.
Ray Rhamey
#18. My grandmother used to say, "Into everyone's life a little rain must fall---rain, assholes, and assorted bullshit .
Jenny Lawson
#19. When it rains it pours and when it shines you get melanoma.
Sol Luckman
#20. Swap out one of these men with the mute, and I'll be right as rain," Randy said from his spot near the kitchen entrance.
"Thought we were besties," Bride mumbled into the shot of rum she'd pilfered from Randy's cabinet.
Shay Rucker
#21. Dance in the rain, follow the path of lovely lanes, you are what you always wanted to be, so chill out, dear friend!
Santosh Kalwar
#23. It was the kind of storm that suggests the whole sky has swallowed a diuretic.
Terry Pratchett
#24. It rained toads the day the White Council came to town.
Jim Butcher
#25. There are many things evil people can take from you. However, they can never steal your ability to laugh and laugh loud.
Shannon L. Alder
#26. I decided we should get married no more of this running-through-the-rain shit. We should live in the same place, sleep in the same bed at night, wake up together in the morning, and whenever there's a tornado, I can take care of you and watch Baseball at the same time.
Curtis Sittenfeld
#27. It was pretty miserable wretches that minded at all whether they were wet or dry. He could not understand why such people had been born. "It's nothing but damned eccentricity to want to be dry" he would say. "I've been wet more than half my life and never been a whit the worse for it.
Halldor Laxness
#28. There's gon' be some stuff you gon' see
that's gon' make it hard to smile in the future.
But through whatever you see,
through all the rain and the pain,
you gotta keep your sense of humor.
You gotta be able to smile through all this bullshit.
Remember that.
Tupac Shakur
#29. A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain.
Robert Frost
#30. I will give you the sun and the rain, and if they are not available, I will give you a sun check and a rain check.
Elizabeth Gilbert
#31. A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.
Mark Twain
#32. He was sunset against the mountains, strong, vibrant, dangerous, and yet somehow sheltering, protective. And married.
Picnic, meet rain.
Devon Monk
#33. Sopping, and with no sign of stopping, either- then a breather. Warm again, storm again- what is the norm, again? It's fine, it's not, it's suddenly hot: Boom, crash, lightning flash!
Old Farmer's Almanac
#34. Nothing goes so well with a hot fire and buttered crumpets as a wet day without and a good dose of comfortable horrors within. The heavier the lashing of the rain and the ghastlier the details, the better the flavour seems to be.
Dorothy L. Sayers
#36. If rain is God crying, I think God is drunk and his girlfriend just slept with Zeus.
Chuck Klosterman
#37. Are you telling me Kara Orris is afraid of rain?" Hunter's grin twisted into a smirk as his eyes lit up, relishing his new discovery with absolute delight. "Why, that's adorable!
Katherine McIntyre
#38. Only part you have to apologize for is getting me all horned up and then passing out, but I'll take a rain check
Curtis Sittenfeld
#40. You're missing the point! ... We could make it rain cupcakes from the sky! Raspberry-jam pies would grow on trees, and chocolate rabbits would poop chocolate buttons!
Lisa Mantchev
#41. Let a smile be your umbrella, and you'll end up with a face full of rain.
George Carlin
#42. Sex on a rainy afternoon is like getting all the gloom and wetness to go away for a while. And afterwards you don't even notice if the rain's still falling.
Elizabeth Jane Howard
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