Top 72 Most Amusing Quotes
#1. Curious," it said. "What you call your decent self doesn't dare look me in the eye! What a mistake people make who say that the man who won't look you in the eye is not to be trusted! As if mere brazenness were a sign of honesty; really, the theory of decency is the most amusing thing in the world.
John Kendrick Bangs
#2. What is most amusing and can happen only in India is that the most posh and big households that I've seen in Mumbai, the 'big city', will have their balconies and windows festooned with rows of baniyans and tauliyas hanging on them.
Kailash Kher
#3. The most amusing thing about a pantomime horse is the necessity of having to shoot it twice.
Steve Aylett
#4. Teaching, I find, is not the most amusing thing on earth; in fact, with a stupid lump for a Pupil, it is about the most irksome.
Jane Welsh Carlyle
#5. I think Lilyan (Tashman) is one of the most amusing people I know but I believe she dresses in too flamboyant a manner. Where some women wear one or two diamond clasps, she wears four!
Hedda Hopper
#6. This is one of his most human and most amusing and witty novels. The characters are very Indian. I decided that I wanted to do a comedy, so this was just the right one.
Ismail Merchant
#7. The Blue Hose of Presbyterian College and the Ichabods of Washburn University are perhaps the most amusing nicknames in collegiate sports; Blue Hose refers to stockings, not to melancholy courtesans.
Gregg Easterbrook
#8. It is my belief, you cannot deal with the most serious things in the world unless you understand the most amusing.
Winston Churchill
#9. I've always thought that my children were the most beautiful, most talented, most amusing people to ever grace the planet, and I felt so lucky every day that I got to be your mom.
Jenn McKinlay
#10. As for the fan, she agreed that it was a most amusing trifle: just what she would wish to buy for herself, if it had not been so excessively ugly!
Georgette Heyer
#11. It's obvious you think this is incredibly amusing but allow me to educate you. Men do not like to be teased.
Kristen Ashley
#12. Finn regarded pesky little things like wedding bands, engagement rings, and jealous, hulking menfolk more as amusing challenges than immovable obstacles that could be hazardous to his health.
Jennifer Estep
#14. I do not wish to help Jeremy Clarkson be amusing in the event of my death.
James May
#15. All really frank people are amusing, and would remain so if they could remember that other people may sometimes want to be frank and amusing too.
Ada Leverson
#16. You know it feels good. I can hardly geta ... I don't even ...
There was something amusing about watching him trying to form a coherent sen-tence. Amusing, but arousing at the sametime.
Charlotte Stein
#17. I thought the two ugly ones were sisters, but they got very insulted when I asked them. You could tell neither one of them wanted to look like the other one, and you couldn't blame them, but it was very amusing anyway.
J.D. Salinger
#18. These days, all I ask Fate is that the people she hurls into my life, whether they are evil or good, or morally bipolar, should be amusing to one degree or another.
Dean Koontz
#19. I love funny people, and when I'm with funny people, or people who are amusing in their weirdness, I love it. Because that to me is funny, as opposed to someone who stops and says, 'Hey let me tell you a joke.'
Paul Feig
#20. "Lily and Lo f**k a lot," Ryke says, each f-bomb bleeped accordingly ... "If we had to rank who's getting the most, it'd be my brother, his girlfriend, then maybe Connor Cobalt and his hand."
Beside me, Connor grins and sips his wine, finding Ryke's comment more amusing than I would.
Krista Ritchie
#21. Me, as myself, I don't think I'm particularly funny. But I've noticed that people in my life always have found me amusing. Which, when I was little, really bothered me.
Madeline Kahn
#22. To live simply to die is by no means amusing, but to live with the knowledge that you will die before your time, that's really is idiotic
Anton Chekhov
#23. Anybody, providing he knows how to be amusing, has the right to talk about himself.
Charles Baudelaire
#24. You didn't kill him. He would have killed you, but you didn't kill him."
"So? He was stupid. If I killed everyone who was stupid, I wouldn't have time to sleep.
Tamora Pierce
#25. surrounding yourself with what makes you laugh. Be intentional about hanging out with people you find amusing. Make a point to immerse yourself in media that generates positivity. Start conversations with people who smile a lot. Do something that makes you feel like yourself. You
Tom Shepherd
#26. Harper said, "But Snuffleupagus was real."
"That is the most wonderful sentence I have ever heard. I want that on my gravestone. Snuffleupagus was real. No more. Just that.
Joe Hill
#27. A grandmother pretends she doesn't know who you are on Halloween.
Erma Bombeck
#28. It's amusing to me that we refer to people who live in their heads as detached, disturbed, or mad, when reality for anyone is actually a matter of the individual's state of mind. The mad truth - all people live in their heads. Whatever you think life is, it is.
Richelle E. Goodrich
#29. Nothing is so perfectly amusing as a total change of ideas.
Laurence Sterne
#30. I confess I enjoy democracy immensely. It is incomparably idiotic, and hence incomparably amusing.
H.L. Mencken
#31. Telly never has any smart, amusing intellectuals living on a council estate.
Caitlin Moran
#33. A species that can blind itself to truth, that can plunge so enthusiastically along roads that lead nowhere but to tragedy, is sometimes amusing in its recklessness...
Dean Koontz
#34. That the young rich smell the stink of the poor and learn to find it a bit amusing. They had to laugh, otherwise it would be too terrifying.
Charles Bukowski
#35. When he bowed his head to hide his grin, she stiffened. "This is most certainly not amusing."
He looked up, the humor still glittering in his eyes, and spoke one word. "James."
"Pardon me?"
"James Lamont. It's my name. You'll need it if you're to curse me properly.
Tamara Hughes
#36. You know, when most girls say they want a big rock, they don't mean, you know, literally a big rock."
"Very amusing, my sarcastic friend. It's not a rock, precisely. All Shadowhunters have a witchlight rune-stone.
Cassandra Clare
#37. The last story you should write is the most important story. You should start with a story that is just an amusing, entertaining, fun story to write and learn your writing chops with the least important things before you start applying them to the most important things.
Chuck Palahniuk
#38. These days, all I ask of Fate is that the people she hurls into my life, whether they are evil or good, or morally bipolar, should be amusing to one degree or another ... Most good people have a sense of humor. The problem is finding smile-inducing evil people, because the evil are mostly humorless.
Dean Koontz
#39. It is to such sufferings that we attach the pleasure of loving, of delighting in the most insignificant remarks of a woman, which we know to be insignificant, but which we perfume with her scent.
Marcel Proust
#40. He remembered the gravestone of a woman parishioner in the churchyard of St. John's in the Grove. DEMURE AT LAST, it read. He thought that the single most definitive and amusing epitaph he'd ever come across.
Jan Karon
#41. No one knows Anne's better side, and that's why most people can't stand me. Oh, I can be an amusing clown for an afternoon, but after that, everyone's had enough of me to last a month.
Anne Frank
#42. A joke is a witticism or play on words that's meant to be funny. I say 'meant to be' because most jokes aren't funny. They range between mildly amusing and grimace-inducingly annoying.
Michael Monroe
#43. Paul Lucas had a particularly amusing accent, so I chuckled. That was terrible; I shouldn't have done that, but he took it too big. He got up and said he couldn't work with people who laughed at him!
Fay Wray
#44. Every people is a chosen people in its own mind. And it is rather amusing that their name for themselves usually means mankind.
Joseph Campbell
#45. He slammed the door shut in Ian's face, the lock clicking into place. Ian hit it again with his fist before roaring, If I were a pervert, I'd be looking for something a damn bit more attractive than you, jackass. And definitely someone that smelled alive.
Rose Wynters
#46. You are paralyzed by the fact that cruelty is often amusing.
Douglas Coupland
#47. St. Michaels Mount is a favourite place of mine; people will walk across to the Mount all day and assume they will be able to walk home. The spectacle of hundreds of people realising that the path they walked over on is disappearing under several feet of water is very amusing.
John Dyer
#48. No, amusing me only, I wonder if they realize how they are used?"
"Not a bit. They think they are the emperors of creation."
"Poor lambs."
"That's not how I'd describe them."
"I was thinking of animal sacrifice."
"Ah. That's closer.
Lois McMaster Bujold
#49. Most of the time, because of their failure to fasten on to words, my thoughts remain misty and nebulous. They assume vague, amusing shapes and are then swallowed up: I promptly forget them.
Jean-Paul Sartre
#50. How predictable, how perfectly average, how amusing.
Gillian Flynn
#51. [A]n Obama presidency would be an amusing approximation of the Carter administration, complete with vaporous moralizing and foreign policy bungling.
Emmett Tyrrell
#52. As an occupation in declining years, I declare I think saving is useful, amusing and not unbecoming. It must be a perpetual amusement. It is a game that can be played by day, by night, at home and abroad, and at which you must win in the long run ... What an interest it imparts to life!.
William Makepeace Thackeray
#53. She shuddered. Little frightened her as much as the unholy canines. But she did find it amusing that the souls of evil humans who had tortured animals and were sent to Sheoul-gra got to spend a lot of time in the pits with the beasts. She'd always loved the whole an-eye-for-an-eye thing.
Larissa Ione
#54. Long story short: I don't know shit about whatever dancing monkey of the moment is amusing the plebes.
Antonio Garcia Martinez
#55. I find it amusing that those who helped to authorize and engineer the biggest foreign policy disaster in our generation are now criticizing me for making sure that we are on the right battlefield and not the wrong battlefield in the war against terrorism.
Barack Obama
#56. Simeon Potter notes that when James II first saw St. Paul's Cathedral he called it amusing, awful, and artificial, and meant that it was pleasing to look at, deserving of awe, and full of skillful artifice.
Bill Bryson
#57. There are few things more amusing in the world of politics than watching moderate Republicans charging to the right in pursuit of greater glory.
Mario Cuomo
#58. Robert Johnson invented the blues, at midnight, at a crossroads, after selling his soul to the devil. Dorothy Parker invented amusing women, at 2 p.m., in New York's best cocktail bar, after tipping a busboy 50 cents for a martini. It's hard not to draw conclusions as to which is the brighter sex.
Caitlin Moran
#59. The little black dress must be luxurious, rich, sensual, diaphanous, exotic, severe, lush, demure, demanding, frivolous, amusing, and it must linger in memory, but above all, it must be simple and little and black.
Carolina Herrera
#60. Re: Full Disclosure
Sharing with parents all the ways we tricked them as a child is no more amusing to them when we are in our fifties than it would have been had they caught us in the act.
Ron Brackin
#61. The Reacher brothers' need for caffeine makes heroin addiction look like an amusing little take-it-or-leave-it sideline.
Lee Child
#62. An idea sparked in the 1960s, a thought experiment, an amusing haiku, is now a thing of metal and glass.
Janna Levin
#63. Unconsciously, I fell in love with the small round sphere, with its amusing and capricious rebounds which sometimes play with me.
Fabien Barthez
#64. It is not a very difficult task to make what is commonly called an amusing book of travels. Any one who will tell, with a reasonable degree of graphic effect, what he has seen, will not fail to carry the reader with him; for the interest we all feel in personal adventure is, of itself, success.
James Fenimore Cooper
#65. The playful kitten, with its pretty little tigerish gambols, is infinitely more amusing than half the people one is obliged to live with in the world.
Sydney, Lady Morgan
#66. The implication that there was something wrong with the war plan is amusing.
Donald Rumsfeld
#68. I don't know that she is as amusing as she was when she was a child, but she makes me love her and I like people who make me love them. It saves me so much trouble in making myself love them.
L.M. Montgomery
#70. At first, I only laughed at myself. Then I noticed that life itself is amusing. I've been in a generally good mood ever since.
Marilyn Vos Savant
#71. I was the youngest of my entire family so you are tap-dancing to try to get the attention of your older cousins. I really hit my social stride in 6th grade, but before that I was a pretty big dork. You learn how to be amusing and how to work for it.
Sloane Crosley
#72. To spend your days on such work when the world is chockful of amusing things. Life goes roaring by and you only hear the echo in your stuffy rooms.
John Buchan
