Boat Humor Quotes

#1. Lechery?" he asked with a wink, guessing from the hour that I had been with some palace kitchen-maid.
"Oh aye, most vile," I said cheerfully, and jumped into the boat.

Philippa Gregory

#2. The urge to change my mind and not go at all is enormous. I'm absolutely terrified to leave on that boat. But, if I don't go, there'll be one more broken person in this world who gave up a dream to sit in a chair, pick up the TV remote and shrink.

Lexis De Rothschild

#3. It takes a lot of wind to sail a leaky boat.

Tom Morrison

#4. Hale!' Kat cried, but the boy only stared at her. 'Fine,' she conceded. 'I love your boat.'
'Ship.'
'Ship ... Your ship is beautiful.

Ally Carter

#5. Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.

Mark Twain

#6. I could totally be a ...
whatever."
"Sailor?"
"On a boat?"
"Yep."
"Yeah." He'll sigh all wistfully. "I could be a sailor. But I'm too busy being a fish.

Hannah Moskowitz

#7. Hitch up your magic fishing panties and get on the boat.

Kimberly J. Dalferes

#8. Alright, good night," he said, his words a little slurred. "But before I pass out, I want you to know that you're the hottest biscuit this side of the gravy boat.

Erin McCarthy

#9. A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could have only one book, what would it be? I always say, How to Build a Boat.

Stephen Wright

#10. The Captain's boat inspections were always pretty slapdash, because they mainly just involved him looking at the ropes and planks and barnacles and then nodding to show that he approved of whatever they happened to be doing.

Gideon Defoe

#11. It's you," she murmured, staring at his eyes, a fine, dove gray.
He smiled. "Of course, it's me. Let's get you back to your boat.

Cheryl Sterling

#12. The boat was so old; it must have been launched when Long John Silver had two legs and an egg on his shoulder.

Chic Murray

#13. I would describe the size and style of our vessel, but I don't know anything about sailing, so I'm trusting you to picture a boat.

Anna Kendrick

#14. Your boat's not like to sink, I don't think. Boats only sink when I'm aboard.

George R R Martin

#15. I thought instead of a good rule for survival on Wall Street: Never agree to anything proposed on someone else's boat or you'll regret in in the morning.

Michael Lewis

#16. Do they allow tipping on the boat? - Yes, sir. Have you got two fives? - Oh, yes, sir. Then you won't need the ten cents I was going to give you.

Groucho Marx

#17. His boat sank. They were all on his side.

Ljupka Cvetanova

#18. They cursed us - not with a common cursory curse, but with long, carefully-thought-out, comprehensive curses, that embraced the whole of our career, and went away into the distant future, and included all our relations, and covered everything connected with us - good, substantial curses.

Jerome K. Jerome

#19. This was Jonan's boat. She had helped Nan Seller dose his entire crew against the annual diarrhea outbreak known as the winter runs

Sarah Zettel

#20. Grampie's boat was a little double-ender, a model not built nowadays. She was narrow, so that she pitched and rolled something wicked in almost any sea. He could handle her, but he said she was probably the boat Christ got out of and walked away from on the water.

Ruth Moore

#21. Look at the limes in this drink, how they float. That's good news. Next time I'm on a boat, and it capsizes, I will reach for a lime. I'm saved by the buoyancy of citrus.

Mitch Hedberg

#22. If life were a sea adventure, I knew: I wouldn't be sailor, pirate, or cabin boy but more likely a barnacle clinging to the side of the boat.

Sara Levine

#23. They were all on his side. Hi boat sank.

Ljupka Cvetanova

#24. Damn, this op has been like a fucking Love Boat episode.

Suzanne Brockmann

#25. The Kerguelen Islands in the southern Indian Ocean are a six-day boat ride from Madagascar, and their only inhabitants are French scientists.

Cary McNeal

#26. Well, I still don't like him! What kind of a man doesn't name his boat?

Amber Silvia

#27. The shark's just a shark, right? No one calls it Jaws. It doesn't call itself Jaws. The film is called Jaws, the shark is just a fucking shark. So how can you say, "I like the bit where Jaws bites the boat"?

Jonathan Trigell

#28. Ah, I know that," said Tiffany, as the boat rocked on the swell. "Whales aren't dangerous, because they just eat very small things ... "
"Row like the blazes, lads!" Rob Anybody yelled.

Terry Pratchett

#29. Parallel tough-guy nods. Man fix boat! Man be strong!
"What now?" I asked, hoping to divert the two from actually beating their chests.

Kathy Reichs

#30. It was guarded by a few demons, but most of Set's forces were running towards our boat, screaming and throwing rocks (which tended to fall back down and hit them, but no one says demons are too bright)

Rick Riordan

#31. I thought you said you dislocated Selene's shoulder!"" Sonny called to Cait, who'd tumbled for safety into the black water behind the stern of the boat.
""I did! I guess someone elserelocated it!"" she shouted back.

Lesley Livingston

#32. If you asked why the post had not come, or why the boat did not sail for England, or why your coffee was cold, or why your boots were not cleaned, or why your window was shut, or why the canary didn't sing,-you would always be sure to be told, c'est la guerre!

Louise Mack

#33. You greedy schmuck!" Denise burst out.
Ian cast a leisurely glance in her direction. "And now my feelings are hurt. That'll cost you the boat, too.

Jeaniene Frost

#34. Tolstoy carelessly neglects to include a boat race.

Mark Twain

#35. We didn't stow away!" Dan protested. "You sunk our boat and pulled us out of the canal!"
"Good point," Ian agreed. "Return them to the canal. Roughly, please.

Gordon Korman