Top 50 Small Things Funny Quotes
#1. That big guy, Winfield, at 6'6, can do things only a small man can do.
Jerry Coleman
#2. My dick twitched, and my hand drew up to the small of his back. I was sure he could feel my heart thump with an erratic rhythm while I wondered how it would feel to push my swelling dick into his ass. I swallowed hard, and David leaned back to give me a funny look.
Santino Hassell
#3. A horse blanket, Mel?
I remembered what I was wearing. 'It tore in half when Hrani tried washing it. She was going to mend it. This piece was too small for a horse, but it was just right for me.'
Bran laughed a little unsteadly. 'Mel. A horse blanket.
Sherwood Smith
#4. Pray for the love which allows you to see the good in your companion. Pray for the love that makes weaknesses and mistakes seem small. Pray for the love to make your companion's joy your own. Pray for the love to want to lessen the load and soften the sorrows of your companion
Henry B. Eyring
#5. I don't think that [Hillary Clinton] can turn around her honesty and trustworthiness problems with one speech, but she could present herself tonight as more relatable, give people a glimpse of that warm, funny woman the people who meet her in small groups and one-on-one say that she is.
Tamara Keith
#6. I looked around the tiny bathroom, at the three of us crammed in. A billionaire, a movie star, and a small town girl. It was some sick lesbian twist on Gilligan's Island. I would have laughed but none of it was funny.
Giselle Fox
#7. I'm a cat person. I have two giant cats [Harry and Arturo] that I call the small panthers. They're like 17 pounds each-they're big boys! Every photo on my phone is of them doing something funny.
Dave Franco
#8. It sounds like a horse,' Alice thought to herself. And an extremely small voice, close to her ear, said, 'You might make a joke on that - something about "horse" and "hoarse," you know.
Lewis Carroll
#9. You asked what is the secret of a really good sketch. And it is a sketch is a small play. It's got a beginning, and a middle and an end. It should have a plot; it should have the characters, conflict. It is a little play. And in it, will be funny stuff.
Harvey Korman
#10. I have given my all Funny how you could always make me feel small
Nicki Minaj
#11. How did I prepare for night shifts? When I was a small, anxious kid, I checked my mom in her sleep to make sure she was still breathing.
Joyce Rachelle
#12. Comedy is learning to be funny, and you learn to be funny in small rooms with young audiences.
Joan Rivers
#14. My town's quite small and you kinda recognize everyone when you see them, so I definitely get funny looks from people.
Birdy
#15. Dog owners are out in all kinds of weather. They tell you it's small payment for the love their dogs bear them. Some love. If that dog weren't on a leash, he'd be off after another dog, a cat, or any stranger walking along the street with a wet bag of meat.
Selma Diamond
#16. You know, the funny thing about Lorne and that show is that, you can go over one million things, but in a business of bean counters, he still likes to laugh at small things and creates a show around it.
Colin Quinn
#17. You're doing this for Kimmie for free."
"I'd do anything for Kimmie."
"Including bury a body?"
"Especially bury a body.
Jamie Farrell
#18. It's a very small object to be capable of doing many wonderful things, don't you think?"
"It does much more that that," Valkyrie said, opening up a game and showing it to him.
His eyes widened. "What wonder is this?"
"It's called Angry Birds. Now do you believe me?
Derek Landy
#19. I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!
Kristen Schaal
#20. *Appendix usually means "small outgrowth from large intestine," but in this case it means "additional information accompanying main text." Or are those really the same things? Think carefully before you insult this book.
Pseudonymous Bosch
#21. All the things I thought I was - simple and plain and sometime funny - are very small words. They do not begin to describe me. They do not begin to express what is inside of me. I have value, and I have worth. I cannot be replaced like old shoes or taken for granted like tap water.
Adriana Trigiani
#22. I find that very appealing: the blurring of the lines between what's funny and what's tragic. And what's ordinary and what's not - the big things in the small things.
Rachel Joyce
#23. It's funny how, when you look back on the big things that have happened in your life, you realize that there were small things you might have done which would completely have changed the course of events.
Stuart Prebble
#24. You can be a lot more subtle on TV, which is funny because I feel like TV is known for being the opposite of that. The thing we experience in life is that things are not overly dramatic, and things often happen in really small ways.
Jay Duplass
#25. A woman gets stretch marks from one of two things. Either she was big and got small or she was small and got big.
Katt Williams
#26. My dad hasn't said much about his college days. Oh, a few times, he might start telling stories. And I've seen some highlight film of him from college. I remember thinking he looked really small. Which is funny, because growing up, I thought he was a pretty big guy.
Andrew Luck
#27. It's funny how some distance makes everything seem small, and the fears that once controlled me can't get to me at all.
Idina Menzel
#28. It takes the same effort to dream small or dream big. Dream big!
Mani Maran
#29. If my mom sees you here, she'll ---"
"Paper the walls with my innards while the innocents watch?
Jamie Farrell
#30. She promised herself that from now on she would try to sit as close to Neal as possible. She could not kick someone eight chairs away.
Tamora Pierce
#31. I bought an ant farm. I don't know where I am going to get a tractor that small!
Steven Wright
#32. Well sue me for staring. I'd be willing to scrub away my shame on his washboard abs.
Tia Giacalone
#33. Instead of heading for a big mental breakdown, I decided to have a small breakdown every Tuesday evening.
Graham Parke
#34. I have little sister Lola, she is small and very funny.
Lauren Child
#35. I've never directed before, so I need to make sure that people know that I can. The movie that I've written, 'The Sophisticates,' is a ... small ensemble comedy and I hope it's charming and funny.
Lena Headey
#37. Toto was not gray; he was a little black dog, with long silky hair and small black eyes that twinkled merrily on either side of his funny, wee nose.
L. Frank Baum
#38. It's funny. I used to look up at the stars and feel so small and unimportant. But I've come to realize that the only thing that can ever make you feel alive and important is the one person who takes you for you.
Tillie Cole
#39. It was a small town: Ferguson, Ohio. When you entered there was a big sign and it said, "Welcome to Ferguson. Beware of the Dog." The all-night drugstore closed at noon.
Jackie Vernon
#40. This is where you all live?" Asked John as they ascended the stairs. "It's small."
"This is just our Thanksgiving house," Scott muttered. "We have a house for every day of the year.
Adam Rex
#41. How are you feeling?"
"Like I fell out a burning building onto pavement, you?" I grumbled.
"Like I was pushed out of a burning building by a maniac," she retorted, a small smile playing across her face.
R.R. Virdi
#42. Josh squeezed her arm. "I'll behave," he murmured. "For now."
She's going to pickle your cucumbers."
"He has more than one?" Natalie whispered.
"That's between me and Kimmie," Josh replied.
Jamie Farrell
#43. Right on time, sugar." Josh draped his arm around her shoulders and steered her through the lobby. "Traffic okay?"
"Yeah, except when that alien spaceship landed on I-90 and then all those crickets jumped out to perform Beethoven's Fifth on kazoos. Otherwise, clear sailing.
Jamie Farrell
#44. Yeah? Rock 'n' Roll is fast, you know. If all goes according to plan I could be in rehab next thursday. Tuesday week I'll be living on an island with a small Indian boy.
Noel Fielding
#45. A new baby! Why, Scarlett, this is a surprise!" he laughed, leaning down to push the blanket away from Ella Lorena's small ugly face." - Rhett Butler
Margaret Mitchell
#46. Pete Davidson - he's in the movie 'Trainwreck.' He has a small part in it. I told Lorne Michaels about him, said he was really funny.
Bill Hader
#47. It's funny because Hollywood is such a small place that everyone really is less than 6 degrees of separation.
Kevin Connolly
#48. With these Funny or Die videos, I do everything for them. I write them, act in them, and co-direct them with my buddy Brian McGinn, who I grew up with. We also edit them together. We're working on a small scale of Internet videos, but we're slowly trying to make them become a bigger thing.
Dave Franco
#49. Condoms should be marked in 3 sizes: jumbo, colossal and super colossal, so that men do not have to go in and ask for the small.
Barbara Seaman
#50. The small things of life were often so much bigger than the great things ... the trivial pleasure like cooking, one's home, little poems especially sad ones, solitary walks, funny things seen and overheard.
Barbara Pym
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