Top 30 Sarcastic Ex Quotes
#1. No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.
Groucho Marx
#2. I am surprised you didn't whack your head on an overhanging branch back there. I have never seen anyone leap straight up off the ground the way you did when you saw that snake! It would make a good move for our next dance. Do you think you could teach the others? The snake jump?
Jennifer Frick-Ruppert
#3. Yes, you'd make a great partner for him. What with the embezzling and the adultery and the drinking. That's what every man wants in a wife - a vaguely alcoholic, fornicating thief.
Eleanor Brown
#4. ...and yes that was meant to be interpreted in a sarcastic bubblegum tone complete with clapping and jazz hands.
K.R. Grace
#5. No, and I don't like mornin' people... or mornin's... or people."
"Wow, I'm a lucky guy to have you, baby."
Sarcastic pig!
L.A. Casey
#6. It's a sort of piss-take on culture, because a drag queen is a clown - a parody of our society. It's a sarcastic spoof on culture, which allows us to laugh at ourselves - but in a way that is inclusive of everyone.
RuPaul
#7. Christians rejected the need for proof to support belief in God, yet dismissed proof altogether when it was there.
Kira Peikoff
#8. I can't go to a bad movie by myself. What, am I gonna make sarcastic remarks to strangers?
Jerry Seinfeld
#9. In my deepest parts of sadness, I'm always making a joke or being sarcastic.
Lea Thompson
#10. So, you're telling me the zoo commissioned you to make a zombie panda in order to avoid a potential international incident.
Lish McBride
#11. I don't fancy myself as a very sarcastic person in real life.
Reggie Lee
#12. Really?"
"No. I'm being ironic. Or is it sarcastic? I can never remember."
"Irony's cleverer, so you're probably being sarcastic.
Jonathan Stroud
#13. You're one of those people who fall off a tree and never quite reach the ground.
Carlos Ruiz Zafon
#14. Everyone knows what a hypocrite is. That's the guy who gripes about the sex, violence and nudity on his VCR.
Zig Ziglar
#15. My mom was sarcastic about men. She would tell me Adam was the rough draft and Eve was the final product. She was a feminist minister, an earth mom who wore a bra only on Sundays.
Daphne Zuniga
#16. I thought I could make a sarcastic joke about it. But it's based on my own struggle with how much to give, how much it's really helping or not, and how foolish or not I feel. Giving sometimes backfires ...
Nicole Holofcener
#17. She was a sarcastic bitch and when she was pissed off the sarcasm took on a life of it's own.
Suzanne Wrightt
#18. She has been kissed as often as a police-court Bible, and by much the same class of people.
Robertson Davies
#19. CALVIN:
Our hero regains consciousness at the feet of a sarcastic alien.
Bill Watterson
#20. I appreciate thieves who do their research, but at least you recognize worth when you see it.
M.L. LeGette
#22. His face is livid, gaunt his whole body, his breath is green with gall; his tongue drips poison.
John Quincy Adams
#23. EVANGELIST, n. A bearer of good tidings, particularly (in a religious sense) such as assure us of our own salvation and the damnation of our neighbors.
Ambrose Bierce
#24. We went to Mexico, had some tequlia, eloped with a pair of drug smugglers, and took part-time jobs as exotic dancers. You know, same old, same old.
Jennifer Lynn Barnes
#25. It's not because John McCain doesn't care. It's because John McCain doesn't get it.
Barack Obama
#26. Manuel will show you to your rooms - if you're lucky.
John Cleese
#28. You take the lies out of him, and he'll shrink to the size of your hat; you take the malice out of him, and he'll disappear.
Mark Twain
#29. Some of us are looking at the stars, but all of us are living in the gutter.
Vann Chow
#30. The service in L.A. is the best. You don't get sarcastic, surly, fed-up waiters and waitresses like you do in England. They're good at their job and they're there for the customer. The only depressing thing is a lot of them have written more screenplays than me.
Ricky Gervais
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