Top 55 Retriever Quotes
#1. You're supposed to be a Labrador retriever!" I shouted. "Not a Labrador evader!
Anonymous
#2. Dwayne's only companion at night was a Labrador retriever named Sparky. Sparky could not wag his tail - because of an automobile accident many years ago, so he had no way of telling other dogs how friendly he was. He had to fight all the time. His ears were in tatters. He was lumpy with scars. ***
Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
#3. Such a better world it would be if we all had the morals of a Golden Retriever; butt sniffing notwithstanding.
A.A. Bell
#4. The voice in my head is is fond of upper-case. It's like having a sub-cranial golden retriever.
Tabitha McGowan
#5. Okay, you drive," she said. "I'll sit with m head hanging out of the window like a golden retriever.
Kim Harrison
#6. The little ball went up, then down, then up in his palm. My inner golden retriever couldn't look away.
Jennifer L. Armentrout
#7. Art is like an ill-trained Labrador retriever that drags you out into traffic.
Annie Dillard
#8. I am very benign-looking. I'm somewhat like a golden retriever: It's not hard to look at me. I'm perfectly fine. It's not like things jut out and make you nervous. But the lovely thing about being so pale and having such pasty features is that I can look like pretty much anything, which is nice.
Elizabeth Mitchell
#9. I'd thought Clarice's smile was both too dim and friendly and too wide and white, so that she looked to me like the love child of a cannibal and a Labrador retriever.
Joshilyn Jackson
#10. I've watched goldfish make babies, and ants execute earwigs. I've seen a fly deliver live young while having its head eaten by a mantis. And I had a golden retriever behave like one.
N.D. Wilson
#11. We don't even have a goldfish." "You've got to think toward the future." My dad smiled at me. "Maybe one day you'll move out and your mom and I will get a golden retriever to replace you.
Robin Benway
#12. A.E. Matthews ambled through This Was a Man like a charming retriever who has buried a bone and can't quite remember where.
Noel Coward
#13. Thanks a lot. You could have cut the girl some slack. We haven't had anything pretty to look at around here since Bradley's old golder retriever died died last fall.
Robyn Carr
#15. My libido was like a Golden Retriever puppy, ready to jump all over him and lick his face.
Down, girl.
Sarina Bowen
#16. Kilgore Trout owned a parakeet named Bill. Like Dwayne Hoover, Trout was all alone at night, except for his pet. Trout, too, talked to his pet. But while Dwayne babbled to his Labrador retriever about love, Trout sneered and muttered to his parakeet about the end of the world.
Kurt Vonnegut
#17. Capo, my first golden retriever, so loved to swim she once jumped off a cliff to get into Lake Superior.
Sara Paretsky
#18. My friend Phil has a theory that the Lord, having made teenagers, felt constrained to make amends and so created the golden retriever.
Mary McGrory
#19. There was a golden retriever who saved countless lives on September 11 by going back in to find people. His companion was in a wheelchair. He got him out and kept going back in to save others.
Linda Blair
#20. Once someone has had the good fortune to share a true love affair with a Golden Retriever, one's life and one's outlook is never quite the same.
Betty White
#21. If Levi were a dog, he'd be a golden retriever. If he were a game, he'd be a Ping-Pong, incessant and bouncing and light.
Rainbow Rowell
#22. So when the moon's only partly full, you only feel a little wolfy?"
"You could say that."
"Well, you can go ahead and hang your head out the car window if you feel like it."
"I'm a werewolf, not a golden retriever.
Cassandra Clare
#24. Mike, who was taking on the qualities of a golden retriever, walked faithfully by my side to class.
Stephenie Meyer
#25. I love everybody. I think my totem animal is a Labrador Retriever.
Abigail Disney
#27. Mousse was a Labrador retriever, which is a large enthusiastic bulletproof species of dog made entirely from synthetic materials. This is the kind of dog that, if it takes an interest in your personal regions (which of course it does) you cannot fend it off with a blowtorch.
Dave Barry
#28. I am the planet's most affectionate life-form, something like the cross between a golden retriever and a barnacle.
Elizabeth Gilbert
#29. I've been surrounded by dogs my whole life. I got a golden retriever a year after I was born.
Jon Hamm
#30. Noah appeared beside Blue. He looked joyful and adoring, like a Labrador retriever.
Maggie Stiefvater
#31. Well, you can go ahead and hang your head out the car window if you feel like it."
Luke laughed. "I'm a werewolf, not a golden retriever."
-Clary & Luke, pg.415-
Cassandra Clare
#32. And evolution wasn't even properly invented until the late 1800s. Is that enough time to get a Labrador retriever from a dire wolf? I think not.
Bobby Henderson
#33. We threw chew toys to Misty, Mom's golden retriever that she bought two years ago secondhand. Misty was supposed to be a seeing-eye dog, but she failed her exam because she's too affectionate. It's a flaw we don't mind.
Douglas Coupland
#34. The best long range shotgun load to have in one's boat for mallards is a fine retriever.
Nash Buckingham
#35. I'm a natural golden retriever at heart. I'm fine with that now, but there was a time when I tried to keep myself from jumping up on people. I had to make myself sit.
Sigourney Weaver
#36. Try throwing a ball just once for a dog. It would be like eating only one peanut or potato chip. Try to ignore the importuning of a Golden Retriever who has brought you his tennis ball, the greatest treasure he possesses!
Roger Caras
#37. I call my golden retriever Cara my 'white wolf.' She's changed my attitude and made me write this book where the wolf is the hero, not the villain.
Debi Gliori
#38. There is something about the human condition. I don't think dogs are like "If only I was a poodle instead of a golden retriever, I'd be totally happy." Dogs are happy with who they are.
Michael Ian Black
#39. Hey, do you know what you call a blond with a brain?" I asked, and the continued on the same breath, "a golden retriever."
I've heard that one, too," she said, no longer smiling.
I'll keep trying." I promised.
Stephenie Meyer
#40. If a demon and a vampire mated, their offspring would be unique but in harmony, like a Labrador retriever crossed with a poodle. Voila, labradoodle!
Kresley Cole
#41. The big one was at least cute, and as annoying as she was, you couldn't get mad at a golden retriever.
Chelsea Handler
#42. I opened both eyes. Dread was sitting on my chest as if it were an animal. I mean, dread so real it had physical presence, like a Labrador retriever I could teach tricks to. Here, Dread. Sit, Dread. Roll over, Dread. Play dead, Dread.
Claire Cook
#43. I've often been described more than once in my life as very much like a golden retriever. Just sort of happy and excited to do whatever it is even if it's as simple as retrieving a ball and bringing it back ad nauseum.
Chris Carmack
#44. The ball retriever is not long enough to get my putter out of the tree.
Brian Weiss
#45. I have my golden retriever now, Pontiac. He's a career-change guide dog from Guide Dogs for the Blind.
Betty White
#46. A few weeks after my surgery, I went out to play catch with my golden retriever. When I bent over to pick up the ball, my prosthesis fell out. The dog snatched it, and I found myself chasing him down the road yelling "Hey, come back here with my breast!"
Linda Ellerbee
#47. Fatty, a bearded collie-terrier mix, is the kindest, cuddliest dog. And Oliver, a white golden retriever, even looks like me! My dogs have taught me to be more loving, more nurturing, and happier.
Nicollette Sheridan
#48. The theory is simple.
Every boy, every man, is really
a bit of a golden retriever
or a big chocolate Lab.
Watch any man's eyes
at the bounce of a ball.
His head tilts slightly sideways, just a hair,
as a primitive focus
comes to life.
Toby Barlow
#49. He actually felt as if God had sent the retriever to intrigue him, to remind him that the world was full of surprises and that despair made no sense when one had no understanding of the purpose - and strange possibilities - of existence.
Dean Koontz
#50. I got a new dog. He's a paranoid retriever. He brings back everything because he's not sure what I threw him.
Steven Wright
#51. My golden retriever, Callie, is so easy to please. She finds great pleasure in our day-to-day routine, which helps me to enjoy the simple things. She loves to jump on the couch with her favorite toys and roll around while I clap my hands.
Kristin Davis
#52. Considering what a hot, wed dog smells like, dog stew has a surprisingly savory odor To tell the truth, it tastes pretty good, like oxtail. To be perfectly honest, it's delicious. (Anything about this to my golden retriever, and I'll punch your lights out.)
P. J. O'Rourke
#53. I also go on long walks with my dog, a golden retriever named Breeze-and I work out with weights at a health club a couple of times a week.
Karen Hughes
#54. There was no way a mass murderer would own a golden retriever.
Nicki Edwards
#55. There is hope for you yet.
-Einstein the Labrador Retriever via scrabble tiles
Dean Koontz
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