Top 100 Redneck Quotes
#1. You might be a redneck if when you leave your house, you are followed by federal agents of the Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms, and the only thing you worry about is if you can lose them or not.
Jeff Foxworthy
#2. You might be a redneck if your momma tore her best dress coon hunting.
Jeff Foxworthy
#3. You might be a redneck if you see a sign that says Say No To Crack and it reminds you to pull your jeans up.
Jeff Foxworthy
#4. Graduation breathes on us, redneck lady," he said. "Now is the time to make sure we have the strings to all the balloons we want to keep before they all float away.
Maggie Stiefvater
#5. You might be a redneck if your house doesn't have curtains, but your truck does.
Jeff Foxworthy
#6. You might be a redneck if going to the bathroom involves shoes and a flashlight.
Jeff Foxworthy
#7. You might be a redneck if somebody hollers ho-down and your girlfriend hits the floor.
Jeff Foxworthy
#8. You might be a redneck if you have every episode of Hee Haw on tape.
Jeff Foxworthy
#9. You might be a redneck if your kids are going hungry tonight because you just had to have those Yosemite Sam mud flaps.
Jeff Foxworthy
#10. He was a moth to her flame, a marshmallow to her campfire, a redneck to her bottle rocket ...
Nine Naughty Novelists
#11. I've been a radical for a long time. I guess it's too bad. I'd be more marketable as a right-wing redneck.
Kris Kristofferson
#12. People look at you, and they've got just the perfect little box for you, the perfect category. Call you a redneck. Call you a hillbilly. Like those were insults.
Travis Tritt
#13. You might be a redneck if ... you bought a VCR so you could tape wrestling while you are at work.
Jeff Foxworthy
#14. I met a redneck on a Grecian isle who did the Goat Dance very well.
Joni Mitchell
#15. I like to say, in Hollywood, you can't make a redneck movie without me. That doesn't happen. You better not do it.
David Koechner
#16. You might be a redneck if during your senior year you and your mother had homeroom together.
Jeff Foxworthy
#17. If you have ever spray-painted your girlfriends name on an overpass, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#18. There's an intelligent redneck in all of us somewhere.
Rodney Atkins
#19. You might be a redneck if you need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos.
Jeff Foxworthy
#20. You might be a redneck if you have a very special baseball cap, just for formal occasions.
Jeff Foxworthy
#21. Eleven on a scale of ten, honey, let me introduce you to my redneck friend.
Jackson Browne
#22. You might be a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a chance to meet 'Ms. Right
Jeff Foxworthy
#23. Any questions I had about whether a redneck from Oklahoma could become a Brown Classical Philosophy professor ended when I met Tim [Blake Nelson].
Edward Norton
#24. You might be a redneck if you have flowers planted in a bathroom appliance in your front yard.
Jeff Foxworthy
#25. You might be a redneck if you think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs.
Jeff Foxworthy
#26. You might be a redneck if you prominently display a gift you bought at Graceland.
Jeff Foxworthy
#27. Jerry Springer' is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.
Hal Sparks
#28. You might be a redneck if someone tells you you have something in your teeth, and you take them out to see what it is.
Jeff Foxworthy
#29. Having a little pee in your pants had to be better than being dinner for some redneck.
Christopher Paul Curtis
#30. You might be a redneck if your coffee table used to be a telephone cable spool.
Jeff Foxworthy
#31. If you have more fish on your wall than pictures, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#32. I'm from West Virginia. If you didn't know what was happening in NASCAR, you were on the outside. NASCAR is a big league sport, but it's still also country and redneck.
Randy Moss
#33. If you think the last four words to the national anthem are " gentleman, start your engines", You might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#34. You might be a redneck if you hammer bottle caps into the frame of your front door to make it look nice.
Jeff Foxworthy
#35. Hunting humans for sport? Eating them?" the bitterness in his voice cut through me. "Yeah, I caught that part."
"That doesn't have anything to do with you?
He lifted his eyes, gaze shuttered. "No?"
"Not unless being a werewolf transforms you into a wolf AND a redneck moron.
Kelley Armstrong
#36. Well, I quit those days and my redneck ways.
Elton John
#37. These inbred pinheads are the only people you could find in the world to agree with your philosophies. (In reference to Wally George's largely redneck audience.)
Nikolas Schreck
#38. You might be a redneck if more than one living relative is named after a Southern Civil War general.
Jeff Foxworthy
#39. You might be a redneck if your dog can't watch you eat without gagging.
Jeff Foxworthy
#40. You might be a redneck if taking a dip has nothing to do with water.
Jeff Foxworthy
#41. You might be a redneck if the Home Shopping Channel operator recognizes your voice.
Jeff Foxworthy
#42. If you have a complete set of salad bowls and they all say Kool Whip on the side, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#43. You might be a redneck if you are still holding on to Confederate money because you think the South will rise again.
Jeff Foxworthy
#44. If you ahve ever unloaded your pickup by backing up really fast and slamming on the brakes, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#45. You might be a redneck if an expired license plate means another decoration for your living room wall.
Jeff Foxworthy
#46. You might be a redneck if your father encourages you to quit school because Larry has an opening on the lube rack.
Jeff Foxworthy
#47. You might be a redneck if you won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.
Jeff Foxworthy
#48. You might be a redneck if you're still scalping tickets after the concert is over.
Jeff Foxworthy
#49. You might be a redneck if you've ever hauled a can of paint to the top of a water tower to defend your sister's honor.
Jeff Foxworthy
#50. You might be a redneck if ... Your only condiment on the dining room table is the economy size bottle of ketchup.
Jeff Foxworthy
#51. You might be a redneck if your parakeet knows the phrase Open up, Police!
Jeff Foxworthy
#52. You might be a redneck if you have a color coordinating rope that ties down your car hood.
Jeff Foxworthy
#53. In a badass, beer-glass brawl, would you rather have an academic liberal covering your back or a hobnailed redneck?
James Lee Burke
#54. You might be a redneck if your local ambulance has a trailer hitch.
Jeff Foxworthy
#55. You might be a redneck if you work with a shirt off ... and so does your husband.
Jeff Foxworthy
#56. You might be a redneck if your bumper sticker says, My other car is a combine.
Jeff Foxworthy
#57. If you watch the 'Blue Collar Tour,' I was probably the least redneck of everybody.
Bill Engvall
#58. Get in here and make me some dinner - now, woman."
"News flash, Michael, you're supposed to be evil, not redneck!
Rachel Caine
#59. This so called 'Home of the Brave'
why isn't anybody Backing us up!
When they c these crooked ass Redneck cops
constantly Jacking us up
Tupac Shakur
#60. If your mother doesn't remove the Marlboro from her lips before telling the State Trooper to kiss her ass, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#61. You might be a redneck if you own at least 20 baseball hats.
Jeff Foxworthy
#62. You might be a redneck if your wheelbarrow breaks and it takes four relatives to figure out how to fix it.
Jeff Foxworthy
#63. You might be a redneck if you missed 5th grade graduation because you had jury duty.
Jeff Foxworthy
#64. You might be a redneck if the richest member of your family bought a house and you have to help take the wheels off of it.
Jeff Foxworthy
#65. If the gas pedal on your car is shaped like a bare foot, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#66. There's the old joke, "What's the difference between country and redneck? Well, that's three hundred dollars."
Larry The Cable Guy
#67. I always found strange comfort that the American propensity for mixing alcohol and firearms cut across racial, socioeconomic, and cultural divides, from rural redneck to ghetto gangbanger to skeet-shooting blue blood.
Brad Parks
#68. You might be a redneck if taking your wife on a cruise means circling the Dairy Queen.
Jeff Foxworthy
#69. You might be a redneck if your pocketknife has ever been referred to as Exhibit A.
Jeff Foxworthy
#70. You might be a redneck if you need an estimate from your barber before you get a haircut.
Jeff Foxworthy
#71. You might be a redneck if your primary source of income is the pawn shop.
Jeff Foxworthy
#72. You might be a redneck if ... the most serious loss from the earthquake was your Conway Twitty record collection.
Jeff Foxworthy
#73. You might be a redneck if you can amuse yourself for more than an hour with a fly swatter.
Jeff Foxworthy
#75. You might be a redneck if people hear your car long before they see it.
Jeff Foxworthy
#77. You might be a redneck if the dog catcher calls for a backup unit when he visits your house.
Jeff Foxworthy
#78. I had a black belt in redneck pissed off bitch dirty fighting.
Diana Rowland
#80. You might be a redneck if your Momma would rather go the racetrack than the Kennedy Center.
Jeff Foxworthy
#81. You might be a redneck if the best way to keep things cold is to leave'em in the shade.
Jeff Foxworthy
#82. Let's all sing the redneck national anthem: Settle for what you can get.
Barbara Kingsolver
#83. You might be a redneck if a full-grown ostrich has fewer feathers than your cowboy hat.
Jeff Foxworthy
#84. If your wife's hairdo has ever been ruined by a ceiling fan, you might be a redneck.
Jeff Foxworthy
#85. You might be a redneck if you think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
Jeff Foxworthy
#86. You might be a redneck if the tobacco chewers in your family aren't just men.
Jeff Foxworthy
#87. I don't know any redneck that's not into fun. That's their middle name: Red-Fun-Neck.
Si Robertson
#88. You might be a redneck if the highlight of your parties is when you flip out your false teeth.
Jeff Foxworthy
#89. You might be a redneck if you wish your outhouse was as nice as those at the state park.
Jeff Foxworthy
#90. You might be a redneck if your anniversary present was getting the septic tank pumped.
Jeff Foxworthy
#91. You might be a redneck if you give your dad a gallon of Pepto-Bismol for his birthday.
Jeff Foxworthy
#92. You might be a redneck if you've ever worn a dress that is strapless with a bra that isn't.
Jeff Foxworthy
#93. The grand irony, however, is that Southern segregation was not brought to an end, nor redneck violence dramatically reduced, by violence.
Stanley Crouch
#94. You may be a redneck if ... you have spent more on your pickup truck than on your education.
Jeff Foxworthy
#95. You might be a redneck if your 'huntin dog' cost more than the truck you drive him around in.
Jeff Foxworthy
#96. You might be a redneck if you think Silence of the Lambs is what happens when Larry walks out to the barn.
Jeff Foxworthy
#98. You might be a redneck if you entire family has ever sat around waiting for a call from the governor to spare a loved one.
Jeff Foxworthy
#99. You might be a redneck if you celebrate Groundhog Day because you believe in it.
Jeff Foxworthy
#100. Conservatives are routinely pilloried on television. A&E likely greenlit 'Duck Dynasty' in the first place because executives believed Americans would laugh at the redneck antics of the self-described 'white trash' family.
Ben Shapiro
Famous Authors
Popular Topics
Scroll to Top
