Top 57 Quotes About Dark Humour
#1. Whenever dark things happen in my life, there is always some dark humour.
Ken Bruen
#2. My favourite writer is Beckett and I keep going back to wallow in his work like a deep pool of dark humour or like an oxygen tank when you can't breath in a world consumed by piety, hypocrisy and self-satisfaction.
Simon Critchley
#3. Don't mourn me", he said. Because it was a joke, a sick joke and because - at the end - he needed a little dark humour to sustain him.
Stephen Lloyd Jones
#4. They both looked younger than him, as well as taller, better built and undoubtedly more schooled in the noble art of punching fuck out of people. Nonetheless, younger doesn't necessarily mean faster or fitter, and Parlabane was highly schooled in the arguably less noble art of running away.
Christopher Brookmyre
#5. Great book stands the test of time unlike my good self ...
Douglas Adams
#6. She's kind of like a Mary Poppins just before she turns to the dark side of the Force," Oberon said. He was still behind the counter, but he had a good lok at her as she exited. "Let go of your anger, Malina! There's still good in you! The Emperor hasn't driven it from you fully!
Kevin Hearne
#7. For 3 million you could give everyone in Scotland a shovel, and we could dig a hole so deep we could hand her over to Satan in person. (on Margaret Thatcher)
Frankie Boyle
#9. You will suffer, son of Hades!'
What else is new? Nico thought.
Rick Riordan
#10. Suddenly he caught his reflection in the mirror behind her. His face was twisted into a dark scowl, and he was standing there naked, with a boner, and another man's business card in his hand.
He looked like a dick.
Sarah Mayberry
#12. He had followed the calendar, the years, time-
Bird farted.
And it came to me, as though it were riding one moment of the gusting wind, as though bird had had it in him all the time and had passed it to me in that one moment of instant corruption.
James Welch
#13. For the moment we might very well can them DUNNOS (for Dark Unknown Nonreflective Nondetectable Objects Somewhere).
Bill Bryson
#14. Two minutes worth of signal analysis told me all I needed to know. This station "talks" to the dark matter universe about what goes on inside."
"How did you cobble together a jammer so quickly?"
"I had one on me.
Howard Tayler
#15. Killing me still on the agenda, tough girl?"
I walked over to the desk. "Yup, right here next to buy Brendan a leash."
"Glad to know you have a sense of humour."
"I wasn't joking." I mumbled, knowing he would be able to hear me.
Elizabeth Morgan
#17. It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye. Then it's fun and games you can't see anymore.
James Hetfield
#18. Its deadpan and her sarcasm sailed straight on past each other, strangers passing on a dark road in the night.
Nicole Kornher-Stace
#19. I knew today was gonna be bad, but I never got close to this
Ian Ayris
#20. Madmen, criminals, and rapists! Isn't it fantastic? All the romantic proposals I've ever got from anybody. Somebody up there has an extremely dark sense of humour.
Olga Nunez Miret
#21. My wife was saying to me just the other day how she's noticed a spring in my step lately. That was because I thought you were gone forever.'
'I missed you too, Thurid.
Derek Landy
#22. I've always been a monster,' Scapegrace told her, 'but now, finally, my physical for reflects my inner darkness.'
'You smell terrible.'
'That's the smell of evil.'
'It's like rancid meat and bad eggs.'
'Evil, Scapegrace insisted.
Derek Landy
#23. You're not very nice," I say, grinning.
"You're one to talk."
"Hey, I could be nice if I tried."
"Hmm." He taps his chin. "Say something nice, then."
"You're very good-looking."
He smiles, his teeth a flash in this dark. "I like this 'nice' thing.
Veronica Roth
#25. Do you ever think you might be a different species of human, knitted out of raw DNA in a laboratory like in The Island of Doctor Moreau, and then turned loose to see if you can pass yourself off as normal or not?
David Mitchell
#26. Some guys step on a rake in the dark, and get mad and go punch somebody. Others step on a rake in the dark and fall down laughing at themselves. I know which kind of guy I'd rather be. So do my friends.
Spider Robinson
#27. To speak of them out loud, to speak of their hunger and pain and loneliness and humour, to make them visible so that can not be ravaged in the dark without great consequence.
Eve Ensler
#28. If the US is a human melting pot, then Eastern Europe is a scrap yard.
Peter Zilahy
#29. Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke.
Joss Whedon
#30. Holy shit," somebody muttered in the dark.
"A virgin," sputtered another.
"I didn't know they still made them."
"He just did.
Larry Kramer
#32. Where's Kraven? Is he stalking me too?"
His mouth went tight. "I'm not stalking you.
Michelle Rowen
#33. My sister has mistaken me for a mushroom. She keeps me in the dark and feeds me shit.
George R R Martin
#34. Are you following me?" He asked.
"Us?" I was the first to speak. "Um, maybe. Hi there. How are you tonight?"
He looked at me like I might be a bit crazy.
Michelle Rowen
#35. Mum just laughed gleefully at his mounting frustration, like the villainous matriarch in a Roald Dahl story. I suspect a TV guide would describe her idea of comedy as 'dark', or, at very best, 'alternative'.
Matthew Crow
#36. Can you stop calling me kid?" I snapped. "It may have escaped your attention, but I am not actually a child."
The left corner of his mouth crept upward. "It hasn't escaped my attention.
Elizabeth Morgan
#37. I like someone with a really good and dark sense of humour.
Paloma Faith
#38. People always say humour helps to avoid the dark things in life. I think it's the opposite. Humour helps us understand and partner with the sadness and beauty of life. And sometimes, because we're bathed in laughter, we are protected. Or at least, humour can help us see the world differently.
Bruce McCulloch
#39. She was damned if she was going to let a little thing like decapitation stand in the way of keeping him.
Jane Timm Baxter
#40. It would be best to stride in with a cheer "hello!", but she wasn't the cheery sort; she was the "lurking in dark corners" sort. She found a dark corner, behind the Stalker-cases, and lurked.
Philip Reeve
#41. As if reading her mind, he leaned into her again, pupils dark, irises glowing like a forest caught in the last rays of sun before dusk ... "Do you want me to make you come?"
"Is that a trick question?
Dianna Hardy
#42. Huh."
"Huh what?"
"Would you look at this?" he asked, examining a small box. "It says it glows in the dark."
"So?"
"So, what use is that to anybody? I mean, what am I supposed to do? Write her name in
the air with it?
Karen Chance
#43. If you want to know the Correct term for me, I'm a Dark-Hunter."
Nick digested that word slowly. "Which means what? You hunt darkness?"
"Yes, Nick. That's exactly what I do. There's just not enough of it." Now, there was some sarcasm you could cut with a knife.
Sherrilyn Kenyon
#44. Moreover, man carries in his heart the desire always to wield his scientific knowledge in service of the greater good. He would of course never use it for destructive purposes. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! ...
Jacques Tardi
#46. However, for all his affection and loyalty towards the animal, the dog would soon be leaving him - they would both be present at a celebratory dinner when they reached the roof, he reflected with a touch of gallows-humour, but the poodle would be in the pot.
J.G. Ballard
#47. A sly smirk curled at the corner of his mouth as he peered into the trunk. "Why do you have Robin Hood's toy chest?"
- Brendan Daniels
Elizabeth Morgan
#48. Enjolras caught glimpses of a luminous uprising under the dark skirts of the future.
Victor Hugo
#49. Skul-man!' he exclaimed as he rushed forward to shake his hand. 'Last I heard you were trapped on a dead world overrun by evil trans-dimensional superfiends!'
Skulduggery nodded. 'Just got back.
Derek Landy
#51. He liked murder. Murder and long walks had been two of his favorite things when he was younger.
Derek Landy
#52. In fact,' said Poirot, 'she stabbed him in the dark, not realising that he was dead already, but somehow deduced that he had a watch in his pyjama pocket, took it out, put back the hands blindly and gave it the requisite dent.
Agatha Christie
#53. No one believes that the world can come to an end, therefore no one believes it can be saved.
Peter Zilahy
#55. How was your afternoon?"
"No one died, so it was a big improvement on my morning.
Will Kostakis
#56. Light and dark ain't supposed to mix. They're like broccoli and chocolate - just nasty when you put them together - but that appears to be what's happening with you
H.M. Ward
#57. The concrete floor beneath the airbed was hard and uncompromising, digging into her back and making it difficult to breathe. The stale air reeked of disinfectant and shit. And something else that she couldn't quite place. Death, perhaps?
Mark Tilbury
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