Quotes About A Straight Face

#1. Need help washing other places?"
"Yeah. I'm really dirty."
"I can't believe you said that with a straight face."
"I can't believe you'll do it anyway.

S.E. Jakes

#2. You thought wrong. I'm a new man, bein's I'm in lurve and all. I'm a softer, more understanding man. A kinder, gentler - " Deacon snorted. "Fuck. I couldn't even say that shit with a straight face.

Lorelei James

#3. I have always believed that the key to a happy marriage was the ability to say with a straight face, 'Why, I don't know what you're worrying about. I thought you were very funny last night and I'm sure everybody else did, too.

Judith Martin

#4. Fantasy is an area where it is possible to talk about right and wrong, good and evil, with a straight face. In mainstream fiction and even in a good deal of mystery, these things are presented as simply two sides of the same coin. Never really more than a matter of where you happen to be standing.

Robert Jordan

#5. Former President George W. Bush has hired a man to lead his presidential think tank in Dallas. The man was hired because he was the only candidate who could say the words, 'George W. Bush think tank' with a straight face.

Conan O'Brien

#6. I haven't had to do too many, or many explicit ones. Everybody feels weird, and everybody is trying to tiptoe around and make you think they're not there. The last time I did a love scene, I couldn't keep a straight face.

Gretchen Mol

#7. I grind so fine, I'm practically coffee, he says with a straight face, then busts out a grin.

Jillian Dodd

#8. Then she turned, punched me in the arm, and ran in her
bunk. I said with a straight face.

Phil Wohl

#9. Is this some exercise in keeping a straight face?

Neal Stephenson

#10. What are you cooking this night, wife?" One of the crepes picked that moment to dislodge itself from the ceiling. It landed at her feet with a plop as if on cue. "Crepes." She kept a straight face and tried to look like this was the normal way to make crepes.

Shelly Thacker

#11. If enough money is involved and enough people believe that two plus two equals five the media will report the story with a straight face always adding a qualifying paragraph noting that mathematicians however say that two plus two still equals four.

Susan Jacoby

#12. It is day after day in this institution, borrow money, run up the debt, run up the deficits and then with a straight face say, we are going to repeal a tax that affects 1 percent of the American people, just 1 percent of the American people.

Richard Neal

#13. You can be our critic. Would you dig that? (Yes, he was the last Man in America who could say "dig" with a straight face without referring to the process of using a tool to remove dirt from the ground.)

Jordan Sonnenblick

#14. I'm trying to tell him everything will be all right, but how can I say it with a straight face? My son's no idiot. He knows when I'm lying.
The medicine won't taste bad.
The bath is not hot.
Daddy will be safe.
Lies.

Suzanne Hayes

#15. How can I say, with a straight face, you can be anything you want in this world - when I struggled and studied and excelled and still wound up on trial for something I did not do?

Jodi Picoult

#16. No one in their right mind can say to me with a straight face that the Patriot Act has not aggregated the Fourth Amendment.

Peter Camejo

#17. I tend to stay in character between scenes ... to be rather serious on set, but here's why, and I think people will find it surprising. I'm one of the worst 'corpses' on a movie set, which means you can't keep a straight face. You start to get the giggles and you can't stop.

Christian Bale

#18. Very bad joke," Obi-Wan muttered. "D'you know, there are times when you and Bail Organa are uncannily alike."
Anakin kept a straight face, just. "Thank you."
"That wasn't a compliment," growled Obi-Wan,

Karen Miller

#19. I kept a straight face while my inner Neanderthal spluttered and then went on a mental rampage through a hypothetical produce section, knocking over shelves and spattering fruit everywhere in sheer frustration, screaming, 'JUST TELL ME WHOSE SKULL TO CRACK WITH MY CLUB, DAMMIT!

Jim Butcher

#20. If a guy's ever telling you a four-hour sex story with a straight face, just feel sorry for him. Not for lying to you, but for lying to himself. As a matter of fact, stop him right in the middle of the story and just hug him. Nine times out of ten he'll just break down and cry. He knows you know.

Ray Romano

#21. I don't know if I'd do an action movie because I don't know if I could keep a straight face; honestly, I just think it's so silly. Like, I love watching them but I can't imagine me doing one.

Chris O'Dowd

#22. I proved him a liar but John made him look like a fool. All the time Ewell was on the stand I couldn't dare look at John and keep a straight face. John looked at him as if he were a three-legged chicken or a square egg. Don't tell me judges don't try to prejudice juries.

Harper Lee

#23. No matter how you cut them, paste them, rotate them, or distort them, lip syncing and air-guitar playing are fundamentally foolish activities, and anyone seen to be engaging in them with anything approaching a straight face is, by definition, taking herself or himself much too seriously.

Walter Kirn

#24. So, what do you think? Better than four years with Byron?"

"Are you kidding?" I kept a straight face. "Those were the best days of life.

Rachel E. Carter

#25. My greatest qualification for writing fiction was my ability to lie with a straight face as a child.

Ashwin Sanghi

#26. No one can make the album they made 10 years ago with a straight face. There are two reasons: one is you change as a person. To be a true artist, I have to be true to who I am now and write that way. And the second thing is these are different times.

Brad Paisley

#27. Great. Now I knew what his penis looked like. I could never have breakfast with the Paulson Pack again. Eating sausage with a straight face would be impossible.

Roxy Mews

#28. Although 'to paint' means something like "to cause to be covered with paint," one does not 'paint a brush' when one dips it in the can, and it is hard to say with a straight face that "Michelangelo painted the ceiling" when he caused the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel to be covered with paint.

Steven Pinker

#29. We lost the crickets," she said. "Even you can't make that sound tough."
... "I am Butler," he said with a straight-face. "Everything I say sounds tough. Now, get out of the lake, fairy.

Eoin Colfer

#30. (Personal Note: I'm trying really hard to keep a straight face at this point)

Kieran Scott

#31. I'm never wrong? Who besides Republican presidents and evil masterminds can say that with a straight face?

Josh Lanyon

#32. How would you like it if I poked you?" he asks, trying to keep a straight face. "You already did, you asshole! That's how I got pregnant!" I yell in his face.

Chantal Fernando

#33. It's painful to believe that the would-be 'public servants' you're forced to choose between are all phonies whose only real concern is their own care and feeding and who will lie so outrageously and with such a straight face that you know they've just got to believe you're an idiot.

David Foster Wallace

#34. Ingra just kept a straight face he hoped Vilenthe was joking. "Anyway." Ingra tried to bring the topic full circle

Charon Lloyd-Roberts

#35. Well, even if she does get her way, we can keep it small. Just us. Emmett can get a clerical license off the Internet."
I giggled. " That does sound better." It wouldn't feel very official if Emmett read the vows, which was a plus. But I'd have a hard time keeping a straight face.

Stephenie Meyer

#36. I don't know how anyone can keep a straight face and say they are for deficit reduction while they insist on a permanent tax cut for the wealthiest Americans, completely unpaid for.

Claire McCaskill

#37. Doctors estimate that seventy to eighty percent of their business is non-health-related. People aren't sick, they're self-dramatizing. Sometimes the hardest part of a medical job is keeping a straight face.

Steven Pressfield

#38. A straight face is an ignorant man's attempt to appear knowledgeable.

Mokokoma Mokhonoana

#39. How do you know she had sex?" Dallas asks.
"Every time a penis touches Britain, I receive a telepathic notification."
"Oh," Dallas says with a straight face. "Well that explains a lot.

Iris Blaire

#40. I watch the man place the collar on Tuck and tighten it so much that I worry he's not getting enough oxygen. But if that's the case, Tuck doesn't let on. He keeps a straight face. No anger, no sorrow, no fear. The definition of Tuck.

Kaitlyn Deann

#41. I don't think I could, with a straight face, describe myself as a completely positive person, but I'm not overly negative, either. On the whole, most writers think plots through to their consequences, and it's not always a sunny place. I have an occupational temperament for anxiety.

James Lasdun

#42. You know,' Wraith muttered, 'life was a lot easier when we hated all humans and didn't give a shit what happened to the lot of them.' He laughed. 'Okay, I couldn't say that with a straight face. I still don't give a shit'.

Larissa Ione

#43. When asked about how he could have offered the Warren Report, full of inconsistencies, to the American people with a straight face, Dulles is reported to have said, "The American people don't read.

Michael C. Ruppert

#44. Time flies, dreams die, people lose faith,
Tryna hide behind a lie with a straight face.

Xzibit

#45. See? This is the type of fuckery I have to listen to (with a straight face) for hours on end.

Whitney G.

#46. Once you confessed to someone that you had been very depressed when dining with her several months earlier. She was stunned, discovering her blindness like a time bomb. And you, faithful, kept a straight face. You

Edouard Leve

#47. Kristin Bauer is so funny. Half the time I'm working with her I'm just trying to keep a straight face.

Rutina Wesley

#48. You can get away with saying much more with humor than you can with a straight face

Sherry Argov

#49. When people warned me there would be long periods out of work if I became an actor, I couldn't keep a straight face because that was exactly what I had in mind.

Bill Nighy

#50. I guess us folks in California are kind of straitlaced and old-fashioned.
Hahaha, I thought on the way downstairs. I never thought I'd say those words with a straight face ...

J.R. Rain

#51. All lies are told with a straight face. It is truth that's said with a dismissive giggle.

P. J. O'Rourke

#52. It's hard to keep a straight face when I just wanna smile- Fun.

Fun

#53. In the end, all that time I spent in the 'Star Wars' universe fostered galaxies of creativity and made me a better person here on Earth, because it taught me that everyone counts. That's why I can sincerely and with a straight face say: 'May the Force be with you.'

Chris Hardwick

#54. My name is Samhain Corvus LaCroix. I am a necromancer.
Now, if only I could say that with a straight face.

Lish McBride

#55. Scarlett Johansson has a smile she tries to suppress in every movie she makes. She's been trying to keep a straight face since she appeared with Bill Murray 11 years ago in her breakthrough, 'Lost in Translation.'

Steve Erickson

#56. The image of Mac standing in front of a selection of penises, like a witness picking a criminal out of a line-up, was more than Rachel could bear with a straight face.

Suzie Quint

#57. On solemn asses fall plush sinecures, So keep a straight face and sit tight on yours.

X.J. Kennedy

#58. Whatever, Sam.
Whatever! Sam laughed, a booming guffaw. I love this word. It is my favorite from your generation.Decker smiled, unable to keep a straight face when Sam looked so awkward laughing.

Lizzy Ford

#59. I ought to be able to invent words capable of blowing the odor of corpses in a direction other than straight into mine and the reader's face.

Franz Kafka

#60. It's easier to construct a more palatable life story-where I can draw straight lines from each hurt of the past to the healing I later experienced-than to face the raw truth.

Lysa TerKeurst

#61. Men fuck up, you know. Except for Damien," she adds with a completely straight face. "He's perfectly perfect." She manages to hold it together for a minute, and then we both laugh.

J. Kenner

#62. Then why have you been talking about her for the past half hour straight?" His friend glanced over at him, a cheeky grin on his face, and the rockstar glared exaggeratedly.
"I have not."
"You definitely have. I missed an entire episode of Cupcake Wars because you've got a crush.

Andrea D. Smith

#63. I close my eyes, back straight, face impassive. When I look, I will see someone capable and composed, a warrior and a leader all in one.

Sara Raasch

#64. Faith which refuses to face indisputable facts is but little faith. Truth is always gain, however hard it is to accommodate ourselves to it. To linger in any kind of untruth proves to be a departure from the straight way of faith.

Albert Schweitzer

#65. Everybody always laughs because I feel so much more comfortable with, like, a giant paper bag on my whole body and paint on my face. Sometimes I try really hard to take it all off. But inevitably what's underneath is still not a straight edge. And I don't think it ever will be.

Lady Gaga

#66. A bat flies straight towards my face. it gives me a perfect view of of possibly one of the ugliest creatures alive. It has long ears and what looks like a piece of salad on the end of its nose. I'm being attacked by Master Yoda with wings!

J.E. Fison

#67. I know I can never work in a comedy because I can't keep a goddamn straight face.

Evangeline Lilly

#68. Shino looked at me straight in the eye and smiled, her face brimming with a kind of inner strength. That strength seemed to gather the beads of perspiration that glistened on her brow, then sprang from her face and leapt across to my heart with a rhythm like ripples on water.

Tetsuo Miura

#69. With a perfectly straight face he said, "If I need an item, I go into the store and buy it. Why would I waste time going into a store if I didn't need to buy anything?" "For sheer shopping pleasure? The joy of being a consumer?" she offered. Ronin continued to give her a blank stare.

Lorelei James

#70. Her face felt like it was scattered in pieces and she could not keep it straight. The feeling was a whole lot worse than being hungry for any dinner, yet it was like that. I want
I want
I want
was all that she could think about
but just what this real want was she did no know.

Carson McCullers

#71. I don't think he likes girls", I said. "Or boys. Look at the horror on his face. He doesn't look like a people person.

Sarah Rees Brennan

#72. Baby, I'm the oldest of three boys. I can handle a fist to the face, an elbow to the ribs, even a flying tackle. But a woman's tears? They scare me, straight to the bone.

Samanthe Beck

#73. The vocation of putting people straight, of tearing off their masks, of forcing them to face the repressed truth, is a highly dangerous and destructive calling,

Melody Beattie

#74. I don't say things straight into the other person's face. I kind of like to make a joke or a remark and make it digestible or just give a little comment that voices my concern, but is not meant to be a critique, but just a comment so that he understands that I am thinking.

Christoph Waltz

#75. He came up straight to her father, whose hands he took and wrung without a word - holding them in his for a minute or two, during which time his face, his eyes, his look, told of more sympathy than could be put into words.

Elizabeth Gaskell

#76. A hound will die for you, but never lie to you. And he'll look you straight in the face.

George R R Martin

#77. Glitch will go straight to the queen, and she is not going to be happy. With either of us. And if Ash decides to pursue ... For the first time, a worried look crossed his face.

Julie Kagawa

#78. Mr Warty's face swelled up like a puffer fish - all his whiskers standing straight out like poison spikes.

Ferguson Fartworthy

#79. Edna looked straight before her with a self-absorbed expression upon her face. She felt no interest in anything about her. The street, the children, the fruit vender, the flowers growing there under her eyes, were all part and parcel of an alien world which had suddenly become antagonistic.

Kate Chopin

#80. I like dogs better than knights. A hound will die for you, but never lie to you. And he'll look you straight in the face." He cupped her under the jaw, raising her chin, his fingers pinching
her painfully. "And that's more than little birds can do, isn't it? I never got my song.

George R R Martin

#81. No picture I saw online truly captured the effect of that tanned, well-structured face in person. Absolutely none. His face is walk-straight-into-a-wall stunning, and I won't even dwell on his body, but now I understand why his bed is the most coveted spot in town.

Katy Evans

#82. You're right, man! These
corndogs are crap! Drew yelled,
launching a corndog straight at JJ's
face.

Miranda Kenneally

#83. Not that it was Twiggy's fault, but the ubiquity of her image created a sense in young women that to be stylish meant to be skinny, flat-chested with an ingenue face and straight hair.

Susie Orbach

#84. I believe I've got it covered," Malik said with an admirably straight face and smooth tone. "But I wouldn't mind taking a break before getting to the next round. Grabbing a bite to eat."
Ethan glanced at me, questioning eyebrow arched. Have you infected him?
You're hilarious, I said.

Chloe Neill

#85. A good poem looks life straight in the face, unflinching, sincere, equal to revelation through loss or gain.

David Whyte

#86. Instead of trying to fit an impossible ideal, I took a personal inventory of all my healthy body parts for which I am grateful: Straight Greek eyebrows. They start at the hairline at my temple and, left unchecked, will grow straight across my face and onto yours.

Tina Fey

#87. His straight face was disrupted by a smile that disappeared almost as quickly as a box of chocolates in my kitchen.

Katherine Bayless

#88. Because Scientology is perceived and conceived by Scientologists as being this salvation for mankind, you can have people that lie with a very straight face if they believe that what they are doing is protecting the Church of Scientology.

Mike Rinder

#89. Men who hurt Women are my favorite men to kill. Touch her and I'll send you straight to hell - with a smile on my face!

Pamela Clare

#90. I can respect a murderer, and a thief, but I have no respect for someone who lies straight to my
face.

J.M. Darhower

#91. You don't recognize the actor, because he's not from Hollywood's generic teen male pool; the director hat to go off-Broadway, off-off-Broadway, to the little back stages to find this guy, olive-dusted skin, straight black hair, face that looks like he's never cracked a smile on his life.

Shukyou

#92. HD is not forgiving. Once you see your face for the first time in a movie cinema, you run straight to the gym.

Sondra Radvanovsky

#93. Instead of shunning the darkness, we can face straight into it with an open mind. When we do that, the unknown changes. Fearful things become understandable and a truth is suggested: the enigmatic presence of the human mind winks back from the dark. WHITLEY STRIEBER, COMMUNION

Whitley Strieber

#94. He alienated his friends in the sciences by thanking them extravagantly for scientific advances he had read about in the recent newspapers and magazines, by assuring them, with a perfectly straight face, that life was getting better and better, thanks to scientific thinking.

Kurt Vonnegut

#95. My best friend is straight and we sleep together." Jace blurted out.
"Sounds like you should be on a talk show."
Jace's face started to burn. "Not like that. I mean we share the bed.

Jay Bell

#96. So let me get this straight."I rub my nose."You've brought me out to hunt and kill animals with my bare hands?"A smile ghosts his face. He scratches his cheek. "Well teeth, but basically, yes."Oh God. This is his idea of going out? No wonder he hasn't got a girlfriend.

Samantha Towle

#97. Then, as the priest was emerging somewhat uneasily from his lair, he went straight up to him, looked deep into his eyes, and growled into his face: 'If you weren't wearing skirts, what a punch I'd give you right on your ugly snout, wouldn't I just!

Guy De Maupassant

#98. Even before phones and e-mail this county could spread a story faster than a hooker could spread K-Y Jelly," Tessa added with a perfectly straight face.

Linda McMaken

#99. Some people say they have a thirst for life. They're excited about every day and they're prepared to look the bad and the good straight in the face and greet it all with a smile. I like to think I'm one of those people.

Amy Jo Martin

#100. It's a remarkable experience to ask yourself identity-crisis questions from a comic book movie with a mostly straight face, but I don't recommend it.

Jonathan Talat Phillips