Top 71 On Your Birthday Quotes
#1. Do something special on your birthday. Whatever you do, celebrate the fact that you're here, and that people love you and you love them. We only do this once.
Billy Crystal
#2. Consider this on your birthday
You've got life's struggle beaten
For 60 years you've ate
And avoided being eaten
John Walter Bratton
#3. On your birthday ... Have a cuppa, kick off your shoes, sit back and relax ? you deserve it! Best Wishes for a Very Relaxing Birthday.
Margaret Jones
#4. Get it wrong, and we call it a cult. Get it right, in the right time and the right place, and maybe, for the next few millennia, people won't have to go to work on your birthday.
Robert M. Sapolsky
#5. I wish you many congratulations on your birthday.
Auliq Ice
#6. Every year on your birthday, you get a chance to start new.
Sammy Hagar
#7. Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.
Menachem Mendel Schneerson
#8. Best wishes to you on your birthday
may the day be filled with happiness,
a day that's so special for you
and memories you will cherish.
Susan Smith
#9. If your parents are still alive, call them today and ask them to describe the day you were born. Write the details down here, on the following pages. Tell the story every year on your birthday until you know it by heart.
Amy Poehler
#10. Thanks to you, I always am so happy. Now I want to give you all the happiness on your birthday.
Richard Bach
#11. On your birthday today, don't
Look up 'Life Expectancy' coz I suspect
As you've reached 60, you want to be happy,
Trust me, you'll be depressed.
John Walter Bratton
#12. Hud? Back here? Oh, man, what a birthday present," Hilde said, giving her another hug. "I'm so sorry, sweetie. I can imagine what seeing him again did to you."
"I still want to kill him," Dana whispered.
"Not on your birthday." Hilde frowned.
B. J. Daniels
#13. Kissing you is.. I tried so had for so long to deny myself. I tried to do tho right thing. But ever since we kissed on your birthday I knew once i started I'd never be able.. even through we can't..
Jessica Shirvington
#14. I'm sorry I tried to burn you in the flames of Hell on your birthday." She actually looked repentant. "It's ok." I patted her small back. "I'm sorry I made all those birds poop on your head." Her eyes narrowed for a moment. Perhaps she hadn't known I was responsible for that.
Nicole Grane
#15. Enjoy how sweet, how thoughtful, how kind I'm being on your birthday. Because tomorrow it's back to the same old crap.
Melvin Helitzer
#16. At 50, if you are on a diet on your birthday, you can't eat a piece of your birthday cake. So grab two, a piece in each hand and, lo and behold, you will be on a balanced diet! Happy birthday, old chum!
Abraham Lincoln
#17. If you want to look young and thin on your birthday. Hang around a bunch of old fat people.
Anthony
#18. On your birthday thank your parents and celebrate with them. They are the reason you are here and it is their day too.
Robert Cheeke
#19. Something to remember on your birthday..Forget the past, it can't be changed..And, forget the present because I didn't get you one.
Brian Jones
#20. And of course, I had to see you today, on your birthday." "You remembered?" He turned to her, expression earnest. "I remember everything about you, Miss Macy. Every moment between us - the good and the bad.
Julie Klassen
#21. Today you have added another candle of knowledge and wisdom to your life. May it give you the power to enlighten the whole world. On your birthday, I wish you joy and happiness.
Debasish Mridha
#22. Always act like you are the king of your own world that you created on the day of your birth. Enjoy your kingdom.
Debasish Mridha
#23. 196. "Look on the bright side, suicide
Lost eyesight I'm on your side
Angel left wing, right wing, broken wing
Lack of iron and/or sleeping
Protector of the kennel
Ecto-plasma, Ecto-skeletal
Obituary birthday
Your scent is still here in my place of recovery!" ~
Kurt Cobain
#24. "I hope, sir, that I will shoot your picture on your hundredth birthday." I don't see why not, young man. You look reasonably fit and healthy.
Winston Churchill
#25. But if you don't decide what needs to be done about your secretary's birthday, because it's "not that important" right now, that open loop will take up energy and prevent you from having a totally effective, clear focus on what is important.
David Allen
#26. This is Bayle's meeting, isn't it?" Kennet asked, looking over his shoulder at the large bronze clock hanging on the wall. "Doesn't he know it's rude to arrive late to your own party?"
"When you arrived late to your own birthday party, you told me that was arriving in style," Linnea reminded him.
Amanda Hocking
#27. Old age is the time when birthday candles cost more than the birthday cake itself, and half of your urine is wasted on medical testing.
Faina Ranevskaya
#28. I'm sorry Mr Lichtenstein, but your January birthday means only one thing and that's you're probably conceived
on April Fools Day.
Olivia Lichtenstein
#29. I clear my throat. You deserve to be taken out for your birthday. And ... I want to be the guy who takes you on your first date.
Becca Ann
#30. Sausages sizzling on the bar-b-cue the sun is shining bright, today's your birthday, so we celebrate from morning, noon and night.
Susan Smith
#31. Old age breeds the miracle of recall. You have no short-term memory atall; you can't remember what you did minutes ago, but you can recall with exquisite clarity what you did on your fifth birthday and how it all felt.
Vicki Covington
#32. Wish on everything. Pink cars are good, especially old ones. And stars of course, first stars and shooting stars. Planes will do if they are the first light in the sky and look like stars. Wish in tunnels, holding your breath and lifting your feet off the ground. Birthday candles. Baby teeth.
Francesca Lia Block
#33. Child: Why on this night do we eat Hot Fudge Sundaes? Adult: To remind us that being Jewish is like having your birthday every day!! Plus they're delicious!
Jon Stewart
#34. On Sofia Coppola's 16th birthday, way back in 1987, I stole a lip gloss from her Sistine Chapel of a bedroom. Years later, I left a Chanel lip gloss in the reception of the Mercer Hotel for her. You know why? I believe that you've got to fix your karma.
Courtney Love
#35. I wanted to tell you that it's my birthday on Thursday and I would have wanted you to give me the gift of your guts on the floor, one last time,
to see if you still had it in you.
Lucas Regazzi
#36. Made this card especially for you
because today's a special day,
I wanted it to be wonderful
I wanted it to say,
hope everything you wish for,
comes true on this your birthday.
Susan Smith
#37. Why is it that, next to the birthday of the Savior of the world, your most joyous and most venerated festival returns on this day (the 4th of July)? Is it not that, in the chain of human events, the birthday of the nation is indissolubly linked with the birthday of the Savior?.
John Quincy Adams
#38. Dad had once said, Trust your mind, Rob. If it smells like shit but has writing across it that says Happy Birthday and a candle stuck down in it, what is it?
Is there icing on it? he'd said.
Dad had done that thing of squinting his eyes when an answer was not quite there yet.
George Saunders
#39. True Friends are the bacon bits
In the salad bowl of life. How true
I read that and straight away,
My thoughts turned to you
And especially today on your 60th
These special wishes I send
Have a really wonderful birthday
My special "bacon flavored" friend
John Walter Bratton
#40. Being vintage like a fine wine
Should make you proud of being old
And being mature like a cheese
Certainly explains the mould!
Fester on undaunted into your 7th decade
John Walter Bratton
#41. On your 60th, here's something philosophical
To give the old grey matter a stir
How old would you be
If you didn't know how old you were?
John Walter Bratton
#42. Happiness is being served with a paternity suit on your 75th birthday.
Johnny Carson
#43. It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm.
Sam Levenson
#44. As humans, reality for us is largely based on other people's perceptions. If there's 20 bodies in your crawl space but you haven't been caught yet, you tell yourself you're still a birthday clown, and that's how you keep doing it.
Dan Harmon
#45. I wish but to share your gifts as a young boy on his birthday would excitedly rip open his packages to the view of others.
Dan Groat
#46. We had talked about taking a bus to Cincinnati on your eighteenth birthday. It was the only connection any of the three of us had to anywhere and we knew we needed to leave town. He probably didn't even have time to tell you that plan.
Mia Sheridan
#47. Birthday Alarm was a very simple site based on being reminded of your friends' birthdays.
Michael Birch
#48. As it's your 40th birthday
This, we'd like to say
May you be bathed in goodness, happiness and sunshineness
On this, your special day.
John Walter Bratton
#50. As my nostrils filled with the stench of burnt hair and my friends scurried to clean up the mess, I thought, 'If your hair catches on fire while you're making a wish, does that mean it isn't coming true?
Sarah Thebarge
#51. Greg had been nearly out the door, on his way next door to Shari's birthday party, when the phone rang.
"Hi, Greg. Why aren't you on your way to my party?" Shari had asked when he'd run to pick up the receiver.
"Because I'm on the phone with you," Greg had replied dryly.
R.L. Stine
#52. When you're an expert in a subject, you can retain new factoids on your favorite topic easily. This only works for the subjects you're truly passionate about, though. Baseball fans can reel off stats for their favorite players, then space out on their own birthday.
Clive Thompson
#53. Throw all caution to the wind, today, on your 40th
No need to have wisdom and sage
But tomorrow, as you start your 5th decade
Do try to act more your age
John Walter Bratton
#54. So it's your death suit."
"Correct. Don't you have a death outfit?"
"Yeah," I said. "It's a dress I bought for my fifteenth birthday party. But I don't wear it on dates."
His eyes lit up. "We're on a date?" he asked.
I looked down, feeling bashful. "Don't push it.
John Green
#55. Happy birthday, Bright Side. I hope you're in charge of showtime tonight. I'm expecting nothing short of fucking incredible on behalf of your big day, just so you know. No pressure, but you'd better step up and do epic.
Kim Holden
#56. You could hollow out a big pumpkin and wear it on your head for the entire week of your birthday. This will allow you to get in touch with your Halloween emotions.
Jade Puget
#57. May the love in your heart overshadow any sorrows, and may you always know with a deep inner certainty, how loved you truly are.
Jodi Livon
#58. It's my wife Ruth's birthday soon. I said to her: "What would you like for your birthday?" She said: "I want a divorce." I said: "I wasn't planning on spending that much."
Frank Carson
#59. Of course she is. Because she's eight kinds of wonderful, and that's just her legs." Jeb furrows his brow. "What's that supposed to mean?" "Taelor has all the diplomacy of a black widow spider. Garnet's her birthstone. You're wearing her birthday on your lip. Talk about spinning you up in her web.
A.G. Howard
#60. I timed my previous wife's pregnancy to the moment to have my son born on Bob Dylan's 50th birthday. There is no bigger Bob Dylan fan than me. You don't just time the day and impregnate your wife to get your kid to be born on Bob Dylan's 50th birthday.
Charlie Trotter
#61. Then I reached down into myself and managed to say, 'you should celebrate, your birthday should be celebrated, because the world's a better place with you in it.' May you continue to pile on the years, but with more pleasure from now on.
Helen Simpson
#62. If you have older children who avoid you like the plague, buy yourself some expensive bath salts, run a hot tub, and settle in for a long soak. Teenagers who haven't talked to you since their tenth birthday will bang on the door, demanding your immediate attention.
Teresa Bloomingdale
#63. If you are an actress in L.A., on your 40th birthday they should just hand you the keys to the lunatic asylum.
Romola Garai
#64. I remember for my 18th birthday, I was going to get a tattoo, and I made the mistake of thinking I was a man and telling my father, and he was like, 'Oh yeah? You better tattoo a new address on your arm, because you're not living here!' And that was the end of that discussion.
Adam Ferrara
#65. I read one psychologist's theory that said, "Never strike a child in your anger." When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he's recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?
Erma Bombeck
#66. Valentine cards and birthday wishes?
Please ... be on another level of planning, of understanding
The bond between man and woman and child.
The highest elevation, cause we above
All that romance crap, just show your love.
Method Man
#67. Time marches on and sooner or later you realize it is marching across your face.
Dolly Parton
#68. I'm sorry to inform you that your 50 year warranty has expired on your back, knees, and memory. Luckily your lifetime warranty on your heart is still in effect. Of course, that becomes void and expires when you do.
Kin Hubbard
#69. Love, light & blessings be On this day I wish to say 'Health & Happiness to come your way' Happy Birthday
Billie Jean King
#70. When I was six, my best friend's parents bought him a piano. My mother noticed that every time I would go to his house, the first thing I would say to him was 'Levester' - His name was Levester - I said, 'Levester, can I go play your piano?' So, on my 7th birthday, my parents bought me a piano.
Herbie Hancock
#71. The awkward moment when Santa accidentally leaves the price tag on your present.
Eddy Sims
