Top 100 Moustache Quotes
#1. How are you, Watson?" said he, cordially. "I should never have known you under that moustache,
Arthur Conan Doyle
#2. Did you ever hear him in Lohengrin?' demanded Pardoe, taking the ends of his own moustache with both hands, as if about to tear it off and reveal himself in a new identity.
Anthony Powell
#3. They wrote it that my moustache was insured for 13 million.
John Newcombe
#4. I suggested that it was not enough to add a moustache to the Mona Lisa: it should simply be destroyed.
Pierre Boulez
#5. But all this was nothing compared to the face which I regret to say vaguely resembled my own, less the refinement of course, same little abortive moustache, same little ferrety eyes, same paraphimosis of the nose, and a thin red mouth that looked as if it was raw from trying to shit its tongue.
Samuel Beckett
#6. The girl with a moustache" they called me every now and then
"It's about time you wax your arms" those who "cared" said
I faced the fears of the dreaded thread on my face
To succumb every other week to the world's ways
Sanhita Baruah
#7. For whatever reason, I decided: 'I'm 18, I'm a man, I'm going to grow a moustache' - and it was pathetic for years - it was awful.
Chris Hadfield
#8. You'd be surprised how many kings are only a queen with a moustache.
Moss Hart
#9. This man bore no resemblance to the bearded, grizzled Akeley of the snapshot; but was a younger and more urban person, fashionably dressed, and wearing only a small, dark moustache.
H.P. Lovecraft
#10. I've started films like Miami Vice where I'm in really good shape and I look back on that film and see the moustache is bigger as I've got a larger face.
Colin Farrell
#11. A moustache to a man is the same as a fringe is to a woman. When you've got it, you want to grow it out; when you've grown it out, you want to cut it.
Billy Childish
#12. Not having a moustache, he was in the habit of twirling his eyebrows. "Why do you keep twirling your eyebrows?" a young lady asked him one day. "We all twirl the hairs we have, depending on our age and sex," Tito replied. The young lady thought him very witty and fell in love with him. She
Pitigrilli
#13. Maybe if I completely shaved my head and get the frost out of my moustache, maybe I could get one of those serious acting jobs.
Laila Ali
#14. A decent moustache can intimidate a man, while a great moustache can frighten an army.
Anya Wylde
#15. Anyway, that's how it is! Either they obey the law, or they're expelled!! And make sure they wear their veils correctly ... " - "If hair is as stimulating as you say, then you need to shave your moustache!" My father actually said that.
Marjane Satrapi
#16. Twenty minutes later, waiting for our luggage
I haven't seen anyone who hasn't got a moustache yet.
And frankly that is not attractive in a woman.
Louise Rennison
#17. It was a strange thing to behold a whore in mourning - rather like seeing a dandified cleric, or a child with a moustache; it gave one a sense of confusion.
Eleanor Catton
#18. He wore a gleaming top hat. He had a pomaded, uptwirled black moustache. He looked like a first-class funeral.
Joseph Roth
#19. The difference between Nazism and Communism is just the size of the leader's moustache.
Adriano Bulla
#20. Then came the deglutition of saliva, and the old lady instinctively wiped the stubble of her toothbrush moustache with her handkerchief.
Marcel Proust
#21. Life is like a moustache. It can be wonderful or terrible. But it always tickles.
Nora Roberts
#22. I have been growing this moustache, a budding Burt Reynolds number, for a good cause known as Movember.
David Sax
#23. No one should ever have to justify a fake moustache.
Tom Taylor
#24. Lastly he looked at the face so caved and drawn among the folds of funeral cloth, the yellowed moustache, the eyelids paper thin. That was not sleeping. That was not sleeping.
Cormac McCarthy
#25. I'm not a good hipster - if I let my moustache grow for weeks, it just looks like I have dirt on my face. I'll never have a glorious handlebar moustache.
Win Butler
#26. He hams his Brummie accent, I tell myself, the way so many ex-pats ham their lost identity. The moustache is a pose. Yet, he hams this unpredictable matey belligerence, this curiously Midlands attitude. Colin is home away from home, I reflect, even if not the home you ever really liked.
Tim Parks
#27. In 'Pacific Rim' I had to have a haircut I wouldn't usually rock. However, the moustache I had in the film - that might have to come out again. It was a good moustache. Good times.
Idris Elba
#28. Were the beaux less generous over time? Her assets less marketable? If she had lived to be old, would she have resided in a teacup, to be sipped at intervals beneath some gray moustache?
Barbara Kingsolver
#29. I could see it under the heavy moustache, was fixed and rather cruel-looking, with peculiarly sharp white teeth; these protruded over the lips, whose remarkable ruddiness showed astonishing vitality in a man of his years.
Bram Stoker
#30. I will never shave off my beard and moustache. I did once, for charity, but my wife said, 'Good grief, how awful, you look like an American car with all the chrome removed.'
Rolf Harris
#31. I'm an actor, in particular, that likes to have a mask or something that can help me distance myself from the character. Like the moustache or an accent.
Corey Stoll
#32. It might have been the seventies, but if you're old enough for a moustache you're too old for strawberry-patterned trousers.
Jo Wood
#33. INCOMPATIBILITY, n. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination. Incompatibility may, however, consist of a meek-eyed matron living just around the corner. It has even been known to wear a moustache.
Ambrose Bierce
#34. It's true that people were told facial hair was not appreciated by the British public, but I just decided to keep the moustache.
Bob Ainsworth
#35. I was born with my moustache and, no, I've never been tempted to shave it off. I don't spend a lot of time worrying about my face and, like Gilbert and Sullivan's Katisha, my best feature is my left shoulder-blade.
Robert Winston
#36. Dude, we gotta work on your material. Hell, all you need is a little black moustache to twirl and go 'Muahahahaha' while you're at it.
Tessa McFionn
#37. He wore a heavy black moustache and the backs of his hands on the rail were matted with black hair. Bond guessed that hair covered most of his squat body. Naked, Bond supposed, he would be an obscene object.
Ian Fleming
#38. Never put anything on paper, my boy, and never trust a man with a small black moustache.
P.G. Wodehouse
#39. No one was standing in the shadows smoking a cigarette or looking about with a shifty-eyed gaze. I couldn't see anyone quickly hiding a bloody knife behind his back or twirling a moustache, either. That ruled out the Dudley Do-Right approach to finding the killer.
Jim Butcher
#40. I've had a beard a fair few times and, like most guys, when I shave the beard off I experiment with a few different facial hair styles on the way down to clean shaven. But I've never actually had a moustache for any longer than about 10-15 minutes - during the process of shaving off the beard.
James Magnussen
#42. But how a man like you, who looks so wise
And wears a moustache of such splendid size,
Can be so foolish as to ...
Moliere
#43. When people say 'Charlie Chaplin' I still think now of the guy in the moustache and bowler hat and funny walk - I don't think of an old man who was my grandfather.
Oona Chaplin
#44. The train is roaring toward you and the villain is twirling his moustache and you're fussing that he's tied you to the tracks with the wrong kind of rope.
Robin McKinley
#45. Edie Banister, wearing a false moustache which tastes of tiger flank and erotic dancer, sitting six storeys up on the windowsill of the aged mother of a renownedly murderous prince, takes a few seconds to contemplate the unusual direction of her life.
Nick Harkaway
#46. They insist upon the shaving of the moustache, I think, in order that they may accustom the young men to obedience in the most trifling matters.
Plutarch
#47. If Grogssson's got the case, you might as well rifle the body, rob the place and draw a moustache on the corpse; he wouldn't mind.
G.S. Denning
#48. When I was presenting 'Animal Hospital,' the grey started to creep into my beard and moustache. I used my wife's mascara to darken it.
Rolf Harris
#49. A portrait of a muscular grey-haired man with a grim, almost demented gaze and the sort of moustache that could beat you in an arm-wrestling contest.
Ned Beauman
#50. There was only one thing about his own appearance which really pleased Hercule Poirot, and that was the profusion of his moustaches, and the way they responded to grooming and treatment and trimming. They were magnificent. He knew of nobody else who had any moustache half as good.
Agatha Christie
#51. A cinema villain essentially needs a moustache so he can twiddle with it gleefully as he cooks up his next nasty plan.
Mel Brooks
#52. I think there is nothing sexier than a handlebar moustache.
Isla Fisher
#53. Zachary's partner, a younger man with a moustache named Freedly - Well, no. The man was named Freedly. Zachary's partner, a younger man named Freedly with a moustache - Zachary's partner, a moustached younger man named Freedly - Freedly said, "Have you got the ring on you?
Donald E. Westlake
#55. They chose me for Lawrence of Arabia because I spoke English, had black hair, black eyes and a moustache. It was all luck.
Omar Sharif
#56. Tell me immediately who those people are in that glass capsule!' 'Ah-ha,' said the Chief Spy, twirling his false moustache.
Roald Dahl
#57. If only-if only, Hastings, you would part your hair in the middle instead of at the side! What a difference it would make to the symmetry of your appearance. And your moustache. If you must have a moustache, let it be a real moustache-a thing of beauty such as mine.
Agatha Christie
#58. They say it's good but I didn't know what I was doing until I got into the suit and they put the moustache on me, and somehow, when I got all the drag on, it came out. It was the most amazing thing. I'm truly extraordinary.
Harvey Korman
#59. Of the opposite sex, I have the moustache and, in general, the face.
Frida Kahlo
#60. [Elizabeth Moon's] antagonists are always evil moustache-twirlers. She could write a book about a golf open and the main rival to the hero would turn out to have clubs made from compressed kittens.
James Nicoll
#61. A kiss without a moustache, they said then, is like an egg without salt; I will add to it: and it is like Good without Evil.
Jean-Paul Sartre
#63. I was very excited to hone in on John Goodman. Casting John first really set the tone. He's very good at being terrifying and being hilarious, and I loved the idea of that character not being merely 'moustache-twirly'. I enjoyed being scared by him.
Dan Trachtenberg
#64. Jeff Foxworthy is a legend. Every time I see his moustache it reminds me to wax my lip and every time I hear his jokes it reminds me to wipe my ass.
Lisa Lampanelli
#65. I don't have the confidence to pull off a moustache.
Rich Sommer
#66. My 'Movember' moustache was never going to be as big as Nigel Mansell's, but I tried my best. The amazing thing is that when you try to grow a moustache, you notice everyone else's. There are some amazing moustaches on the grid.
Jenson Button
#67. Being kissed by a man who didn't wax his moustache was-like eating an egg without salt.
Rudyard Kipling
#68. Height, five feet four inches, egg-shaped head carried a little to one side, eyes that shone green when he was excited, stiff military moustache, air of dignity immense!
Agatha Christie
#69. There was a time I could have been mistaken for Burt Reynolds. I had a moustache and so did he. But he was the number one star in the world, so there wasn't really much confusion.
Tom Selleck
#70. The judge in the Saddam trial appears to be wearing comedy specs and moustache.
Eddie Mair
#71. No, she doesn't know it's me. I'm in disguise. Look, I know someone who does this with just a pair of glasses. And I have glasses AND a moustache.
Dan Slott
#72. He had a long thin nose, a moustache like flock wallpaper, sparse, carefully combed hair, and the complexion of a Hovis loaf.
Len Deighton
#73. Tell me bout this caveman with the clam moustache been barkin speeches all over Germany.
Esi Edugyan
#74. Your moustache," I continue. "It's kind of like me wanting to be a writer. It's part of me. I don't know who I'd be if I didn't want to be a writer.
Candace Bushnell
#76. He still kept smiling. And his moustache was definitely plotting something.
Sonya Lano
#77. I don't think I'd rock a moustache. I don't mind growing a beard. I think it's just a guy thing. We like to nurture a beard, see what we can grow and sort of test our own patience with how long we can let it grow out. However, I'm not really as keen on moustaches as I am on beards.
James Magnussen
#78. When you're famous you can't go to Topshop. Even when I disguise myself in a moustache, baseball cap, sunglasses - the full Madonna kit - it doesn't work: my stupid face is too big
Noel Fielding
#79. Really, for an actor, it's all about remembering a lot of stuff - and keeping the moustache on.
Martin Clunes
#80. I had Hallowe'en parties every year, as it was my birthday five days before. My parents would actually put prosthetic noses on, and my dad would wear a top-hat and tails, put on a fake curly moustache, and hold a pipe.
Bat For Lashes
#81. No intelligent man wears a moustache voluntarily - you can write that down.
Sam Neill
#82. I always looked up to my grandfather. He wore Italian zip-up CAT boots, and he had a moustache which he waxed into a twirl - now that is worth looking up to.
Brandon Boyd
#83. Some of my best friends are tattooed from head to toe. Some would never think of it. Some are rocking a mullet and a moustache and others are clean cut. It's funny that you don't need to speak the same language or look like someone to fit in.
Travis Pastrana
#84. A lesser moustache, under the impact of that quick, agonised expulsion of breath, would have worked loose at the roots.
P.G. Wodehouse
#85. I'm happiest on set because I'm not myself. I'm someone else. The moustache, the dinner jacket. It's not me. You're always this sort of double, and it's liberating. Imagine being stuck with yourself ... all those doubts.
Jean Dujardin
#87. I was sweating like Christy Moore at a Feis Ceol, so badly, in fact, I looked like I was sporting a finger moustache as I attempted to rescue suicidal perspiration drops from my upper lip. Classy.
Annmarie O'Connor
#88. The writer, an old man with a white moustache, had some difficulty getting into bed.
Sherwood Anderson
#89. His name was Reepicheep and he was a gay and martial mouse. He wore a tiny little rapier at his side and twirled his long whiskers as if they were a moustache.
C.S. Lewis
#90. He could do nothing but twist his moustache, drink, and chatter the most inept nonsense that can possibly be imagined.
Fyodor Dostoyevsky
#91. A mate of mine has just told me he's shagging his girlfriend and her twin, I said how can you tell them apart, he said "her brothers got a moustache!"
Billy Connolly
#92. I go home and stay there. I wash and scrub up each day, and that's it. One month I actually grew a moustache, just so I could say that I'd done something.
Bill Murray
#93. Seeing you with a face would be weird. Do you think you'd have hair?"
"Oh yes. Hair is a must."
"Would you have a moustache?"
"Why would I have a moustache?"
"I'm not sure. What about your ears?"
"I'd have ears too, yes."
"I can't imagine you with ears.
Derek Landy
#94. The curious thing about that moustache and goatee is that when you look at the Mona Lisa it becomes a man. It is not a woman disguised as a man; it is a real man, and that was my discovery, without realising it at the time.
Marcel Duchamp
#95. Our family car was the antithesis of designs and desirability. It was like driving Hitler's moustache.
Samantha Bee
#96. He had a fund of small talk, a pleasant voice, a caressing glance and his moustache was irresistible. Crisp and curly, it curved charmingly over his lip, fair with auburn tints, slightly paler where it bristled at the ends.
Guy De Maupassant
#97. I haven't got an opportunity to experiment with the dimensions of my moustache much. But yes, if the role demands, I'm ready to shave it off. I feel it's good to have moustaches for South films, but I'd love to remove my moustache; why not?
Ravi Teja
#98. I'm a big fan of moustaches. I think it's because - and this is not Freudian innuendo at all - my father has a moustache.
Amanda Seyfried
#100. [in regards to Chad's Nifty Over Fifty Moustache and Beard Darkener] "'Dark Bravado Blonde, Number 143.' The name alone makes my loins all aquiver."
Amber
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