Morning Sex Funny Quotes

#1. You better preach the Gospel like their life depends on it, because it does!

Joe Joe Dawson

#2. Believing passionately in the palpably not true ... is the chief occupation of mankind.

H.L. Mencken

#3. I warn people, your 40s will require massive amounts of humor and humility.

Henry Rollins

#4. In this life, you should read everything you can read. Taste everything you can taste. Meet everyone you can meet. Travel everywhere you can travel. Learn everything you can learn. Experience everything you can experience.

Mario Cuomo

#5. Tod crossed his arms over his snug white T-shirt, silently giving me the floor. Fortunately, I was prepared.
"Sabine ambushed me in the hall this morning and gave me a lecture on sex."
Tod's brow's rose halfway to his hairline.
"I hope you took notes ...

Rachel Vincent

#6. He smiles a lot. But I think there might be worms inside him making him smile.

Stephen King

#7. You're the average of the five people you spend your time with.

James Altucher

#8. It doesn't seem fair," he murmured, once again smoothing out her messy bed head. "You get all the morning sickness, the kicks in the ribs and the bloated stomach and swollen ankles, and I get nine months of sex without condoms.

Linda Kage

#9. In time you will see that you were exactly where you were supposed to be.

L.J. Vanier

#10. I tell ya, I knew my morning wasn't going right. When I put on my shirt the button fell off, when I picked up my briefcase, the handle fell off, I tell ya, I was afraid to go to the bathroom.

Rodney Dangerfield

#11. I woke up the Following morning with the Kings of Leon telling me that "my sex was on fire." I shut off my alarm and that's when all of the memories of the previous night came rushing back.

Kristen Middleton

#12. I always find people who are unique very attractive.

Gina Gershon

#13. Sex when you're married is like going to the 7-Eleven: There's not much variety, but at three in the morning, it's always there.

Carol Leifer

#14. That's probably the most sincere thing that I've ever heard come out of your mouth."

Logan lowered his eyes to Tate's hand. "Now, that's not true. I was very sincere this morning when I told you that I loved sucking your - "

"Don't ruin it," Tate interrupted.

Ella Frank

#15. One should part from life as Ulysses parted from Nausicaa
blessing it rather than in love with it.

Friedrich Nietzsche